Debunking Eros: Why Romantic Love Isn’t the Only Love Worth Having by Mimi Haddard

Debunking Eros: Why Romantic Love Isn’t the Only Love Worth Having by Mimi Haddard

This raises several points I’ve been pointing out here on this blog for years:

(Link): Debunking Eros: Why Romantic Love Isn’t the Only Love Worth Having

Excerpts:

by Mimi Haddard
June 4, 2019

Recently, my graduate students discussed how US culture sometimes idolizes sex. Citing a friend, one said, “the orgasm has replaced the cross as the place of transcendence in 21st century American culture.”

A recent study suggested that, though casual sex is more accepted than ever, loneliness is too.

 Twenty-seven percent of Americans feel isolated, but loneliness is far worse among eighteen to twenty-two year-olds, followed by Millennials. The least lonely were Americans aged seventy-two and older—those having fewer sexual encounters.

Western culture often celebrates eros (romantic or sexual love) exclusively, but Scripture speaks of four distinct types of love: storge (love for those who are familiar, such as family, neighbors, coworkers, etc.), agape (God’s love), philia (love between kindred spirits), and eros.

Continue reading “Debunking Eros: Why Romantic Love Isn’t the Only Love Worth Having by Mimi Haddard”

 The New Summer of Love: ‘People are Desperate to Have Sex – It’s Been A Long Year’ by A. Jones

 The New Summer of Love: ‘People are Desperate to Have Sex – It’s Been A Long Year’

Why are people so sex obsessed?

I’m not going to copy the whole article here to my blog, but one thing I noticed about it is that a lot of people quoted in the article are women – and they are women who talked about how much they miss having sex and would like to be having sex again.

That is definitely against moronic Christian gender complementarian teachings and assumptions that only men want sex. Complementarians assume all women lack a libido.

(Link):  The New Summer of Love: ‘People are Desperate to Have Sex – It’s Been A Long Year’

Whether single, curious or just plain horny, many people are planning to make the most of life after lockdowns. Are we ready to get up close and personal?

by A. Jones
June 5, 2021

he past year has changed 35-year-old Georgie’s outlook on dating. Several disappointing socially distanced dates and limp text exchanges meant she stopped using dating apps at the beginning of 2021.

And now her parents have been vaccinated, she feels confident about returning to physical dates, “but not to the apps”, she says. “As things open up, I’m going to lean into spontaneity; I’m going to say yes to every invitation and seize every opportunity. If I feel a connection with someone at a social gathering, a festival or even a bus stop, I’ll go and talk to them. I’m going to be way more carpe fucking diem about it.”

Continue reading ” The New Summer of Love: ‘People are Desperate to Have Sex – It’s Been A Long Year’ by A. Jones”

Why Are Young Men So Afraid of Sex? by Zoe Stimpel

Why Are Young Men So Afraid of Sex? by Zoe Stimpel

(Link): Why Are Young Men So Afraid of Sex? by Zoe Stimpel – American Spectator site – partial copy here

Excerpts:

… [After having been single again for two years (unclear if due to divorce or breakup with a boyfriend), the author of this piece decided to try various dating sites and apps and to date men ages 20 – 25; she was 38 at the time. She discusses how her conversations with these younger men start out and then end.]

…In these conversations [with younger men on dating apps], messages veer from requests for info on what you did on the weekend to requests for your life story.

Without the prospect of a drink, the conversation then dies. Or they hang forever in the ether.

On Christmas Day, no fewer than eight twentysomething men got in touch, most of them men I had met on dating apps. I’d only met three.

The rest had been kicking around in my DMs, as they say, for up to a year and seemed suddenly keen for a chat.

The third path is sexting. This is the most depressing, and fast becoming the most uncontrollable and ubiquitous, aspect of dating young men.

Continue reading “Why Are Young Men So Afraid of Sex? by Zoe Stimpel”

Abstinence and ‘Purity Culture’ Are Often Conflated but Aren’t The Same, Tim Keller Explains, by B. Showalter

Abstinence and ‘Purity Culture’ Are Often Conflated but Aren’t The Same, Tim Keller Explains 

I’m not totally in agreement on Keller (Link) on everything, but he is correct that too many believers (Link): falsely conflate the concepts of being sexually abstinent outside of marriage with the faults in purity culture and unfortunately ditch the concept altogether.

Yet other Christians (Link): falsely believe and teach that the Bible does not support the practice of remaining a virgin until marriage.

The progressive Christians (and (Link): occasionally, doofus conservatives) try to ease the guilty consciences of fornicators (Link): by downplaying fornication.

(Link): Abstinence and ‘Purity Culture’ Are Often Conflated but Aren’t The Same, Tim Keller Explains 

April 17, 2021

by Brandon Showalter

What’s often referred to as “purity culture” is not the same thing as remaining sexually abstinent outside of marriage, though many conflate the two, according to Tim Keller, founder and former pastor of Redeemer Church in New York City.

Keller explained in a Facebook post that in the early church, the Christian sexual ethic — that “sex was only for within a mutual, whole-self-giving, super-consensual life-long covenant” — was “revolutionary,” given the prevailing Greco-Roman ethic of the day.

Continue reading “Abstinence and ‘Purity Culture’ Are Often Conflated but Aren’t The Same, Tim Keller Explains, by B. Showalter”

Young Adults Are Having Less Casual Sex. A New Study Found 3 Reasons Why by Ross Pomeroy

Young Adults Are Having Less Casual Sex. A New Study Found 3 Reasons Why by Ross Pomeroy

(Link): Young Adults Are Having Less Casual Sex. A New Study Found 3 Reasons Why 

Excerpts:

By Ross Pomeroy
March 08, 2021

Young American adults are not as frisky as they used to be. Between 2000 and 2002, 18.9% of men aged 18 to 24 were sexually inactive. Between 2016 and 2018, that tally climbed to 30.9%. Over that same time period, the rate of sexual inactivity among young women grew from 15.1% to 19.1%.

Continue reading “Young Adults Are Having Less Casual Sex. A New Study Found 3 Reasons Why by Ross Pomeroy”

Why Are We Cheapening Women, Marriage, and Sex? (via PragerU and Candace Owens)

Why Are We Cheapening Women, Marriage, and Sex? (via PragerU and Candace Owens)

Disclaimer: I don’t agree with all views expressed by the PraguerU site (including on their social media), and I’m not sure I agree with all of the content in the video (with Candace Owens) in the tweet embedded in this page below.  I do agree with much of the sentiments expressed, but perhaps not all.

(The tweet with the video should be embedded below; or click here to view it on Twitter’s site)

What you see in the Tweet is a clip taken from a longer video with Candace Owens on You Tube (Link): here.

Owens spends a lot of time in that video discussing why men today aren’t as manly today as they were 80 years ago, then the topic moves on to climate change
– but then, around the 29 minute mark, the conversation turns to the dangers of pornography, and how so many women dress too skanky on social media to get male attention, how the over sexualization of culture and the widespread availability of porn cheapens marriage, sex, and women.

(Link): on You Tube: The Candace Owens Show: Jacki Deason (relevant portion starts around 29, 30 minute mark)



Related:

(Link): We’re Casual About Sex and Serious About Consent. But Is It Working? by J. Zimmerman

(Link):  CDC Report: Virgin Teens Much Healthier Than Their Sexually Active Peers (2016 Report)
(Link):  I Shouldn’t Need An Excuse To Be A Virgin – (Secular Editorial Defends Virginity – More Rare Than a Unicorn Sighting)

(Link):  Why are young feminists so clueless about sex? by M. Wente

(Link):  Woman Says She Refuses to Hook-up with Men ‘For Fun’ – Says Most Men She’s Met Are Willing to Wait

Super. COVID May Be Leading To More Resistant STDs by J. Shaw

Super. COVID May Be Leading To More Resistant STDs by J. Shaw

(Link): Super. COVID May Be Leading To More Resistant STDs

This story actually broke earlier in the week, so if you haven’t thrown out your 2020 bingo cards yet and you had “super gonorrhea,” break out your daubing pen because this is your lucky day.

The World Health Organization is warning the public that certain measures taken to combat the COVID pandemic may already be resulting in mutations of some sexually transmitted diseases that are highly resistant to antibiotics.

This is of particular concern in the case of gonorrhea because there have been significant surges in new cases around the world in the past couple of years, particularly in parts of Africa. But the United States has been seeing similar increases in new infections.

Continue reading “Super. COVID May Be Leading To More Resistant STDs by J. Shaw”

Pastor Quits Church To Become a Stripper and Now Sells X-Rated Pics and Videos Online

Pastor Quits Church To Become a Stripper and Now Sells X-Rated Pics and Videos Online

Before I get to the link about the woman pastor who left pastoring to be a sex kitten on line:

I never, ever want to hear another Christian woman complain on a blog, in a book, a podcast, or on social media that the church “values virginity or sexual abstinence too much,” nor do I need or want to hear any more women talk about how much Christian sexual abstinence pep talks comparing non-virgins to “used chewing gum” made them feel icky.

Because the times have changed.

It’s hard for me to pinpoint exactly when the change happened, but sometime in the last 10 to 20 years, the Christian community stopped supporting sexual abstinence, and they’ve never truly supported adult virgins who remain single over the age of 30.

(They only gave lip service to supporting anyone who is a virgin / celibate, but in practice, they aren’t there for the sexually abstinent; they’re only there to serve the married-with-children people.)

We are living in quite the opposite age now.

The culture has changed. Most people, including Christians and churches, no longer support celibacy and virginity – but rather mock or insult these things. 

In light of the news stories like the one below, or about how, what is it, 70% of (Link): Christian American women comprise abortion seekers, or how up to half or more of the church see (Link):  nothing wrong with unmarried sex, any Christians out there (especially women – it’s usually women, seldom men) who complain that the church emphasizes virginity or sexual purity too much – are quite full of sh*t and have things totally backwards.

The church now openly supports sexual hedonism, and they shame or question adults who remain virgins until marriage.

Are there double standards, sexism, and problems within “Purity Culture” and how sexual purity is taught, or are there problems with the content of it? Yes, certainly.

But none of those issues suddenly excuse extra-marital sex as being fine and dandy.  And the Bible does not support extra-marital diddling.

You can criticize some of the excesses, sexism, or weirdness of Purity Culture and its teachings without completely tossing aside the principles of sexual propriety or without criticizing, shaming, or mocking those adults who are still virgins or celibate.

A word of warning: I am an (Link): ex-complementarian. But as someone who realized complementarianism was false and abandoned it, I did not become a liberal or embrace sexual hedonism as a result.

I disagree with this woman’s lifestyle who is mentioned below. Rejecting complementarianism does not automatically or necessarily turn a woman into a liberal, feminist, bimbo harlot.

I’m putting this warning in here, because the article mentions the woman in the article became a stripper after joining a church that was more egalitarian in regards to gender roles.

I would imagine a lot of complementarians would see that part of the article and say, or reason to themselves, “A-ha, this is what happens when a woman rejects Christian gender complementarianism!” – but alas, no, it is not.

Again, I rejected complementarianism many years ago, but I did not turn into a sexual hedonist or a bi-sexual stripper.

Another warning: If you’re a Christian, stop assuming that the reason why some leave the Christian faith is because they want to live in sexual hedonism.

Some people leave the faith not to indulge in sexual sin, which is a common and false assumption a lot of Christians have, but due to other reasons, ones having nothing to do with sexual sins, or going after some goal or dream in life that may be considered incompatible with the Bible.

People do have legitimate reasons for questioning the faith, ones that don’t have to do with wanting to be kinky. 

There may be some people for whom wanting to be lascivious is one (or a main) motive in leaving the faith, but that is not true for all.

Additional comments by me are below this:

(Link): Pastor Quits Church To Become a Stripper and Now Sells X-Rated Pics and Videos Online 

Nikole Mitchell, a mum-of-three, said she has always wanted to become an erotic dancer but she was brought up in a strict Christian family which put a damper on her dreams

by L. King

She has now come out as bisexual and carved a new career as a stripper, model and erotic dancer.

Continue reading “Pastor Quits Church To Become a Stripper and Now Sells X-Rated Pics and Videos Online”

It Took A Pandemic to Get Yale to Endorse Abstinence

It Took A Pandemic to Get Yale to Endorse Abstinence

This is hosted on HotAir’s blog and is a “VIP” article. I do not pay a monthly fee, so I am unable to read the entire article. 

(Link): It Took A Pandemic to Get Yale to Endorse Abstinence

Excerpts:

….At Yale, however, one of the nation’s allegedly most prestigious Ivy League institutions, the faculty has been working on ways to keep all of their charges safe from COVID even when they’re not engaged in scholastic activities with their professors.

Continue reading “It Took A Pandemic to Get Yale to Endorse Abstinence”

Deep Friendships and Other Asexual Connections Can Feel Romantic, Even Without The Sex. Here’s Why. by R. C. Savin-Williams

Deep Friendships and Other Asexual Connections Can Feel Romantic, Even Without The Sex. Here’s Why. by Ritch C Savin-Williams Ph.D.

(Link): Deep Friendships and Other Asexual Connections Can Feel Romantic, Even Without The Sex. Here’s Why.

Research demonstrates that sexual and romantic desire are not necessarily linked
Posted Aug 19, 2020

A sexologist argued a decade ago that “sexual interest is necessary for the development of romantic feelings.” Many appear to agree.

By contrast, if he had argued the reverse—that romantic feelings are necessary for the development of sexual desire and behavior—no one would have believed him.

….Romantic Asexuals vs. Aromantic Asexuals

An exception is recent research by Amy Antonsen and colleagues who combined data from seven previous studies to net over four thousand asexual participants.

Continue reading “Deep Friendships and Other Asexual Connections Can Feel Romantic, Even Without The Sex. Here’s Why. by R. C. Savin-Williams”

Half of U.S. Christians Say Sex is Sometimes, Always OK in Dating Relationships (2020)

Half of U.S. Christians Say Sex is Sometimes, Always OK in Dating Relationships by A. Kumar (2020)

I am not surprised. This is actually similar to another survey I saw a few years ago, and I may have covered it here on this blog (I don’t remember).

It’s disappointing, frustrating and bewildering how so many Christians are not only living in sexual sin – and sex prior to marriage is in fact sin – but that they think it’s just fine. 

The Bible does speak against fornication, and even if it is not or was not mentioned specifically (as some like to argue), it was still the societal expectation – it didn’t need to be stated specifically in the Bible, since it was already understood in the culture the Bible came from, that God was not okay with people having sex outside of marriage.

There are not, that I can recall, any Bible verses specifically condemning infanticide, child molesting, or bank robbing, but that does not mean that the Bible is okay with any of those behaviors.

I think a case can be made against those behaviors – and against fornication – by pointing to other biblical principles.

In light of the fact that Christians (Link): don’t even make a pretense at living by sexual ethics as taught in the Bible, or in defending them these days, I really do not need to see another Christian woman on another blog or on social media saying how harmful “purity culture” teachings were to women (depending on the context of their arguments. Are some facets of Christian purity culture sexist against women? Yes – but that does not negate that fornication remains a sin).

The pendulum regarding sexual behavior and attitudes held by Christians has now swung too far in the other direction – to pure hedonism and “don’t judge me, I’ll have sex with whomever and whenever I want to.”

And folks like me who actually “walked the walk” and did not have sex outside of marriage are shamed for it, or insulted for it, by Christians and conservative groups (see more about that under “Related Posts” at the bottom of this page).

(Link): Half of U.S. Christians Say Sex is Sometimes, Always OK in Dating Relationships (2020)

Excerpts:

by A. Kumar
September 2020

Half of Christians say sex between consenting adults who are in a committed dating relationship is sometimes or always acceptable, and over half — with the exception of evangelical Protestants — say casual sex is OK, according to a survey by the Pew Research Center.

Some 62% of Catholics, 56% of Protestants in the historically black tradition, 54% of mainline Protestants, and 36% of evangelical Protestants say casual sex between consenting adults is sometimes or always acceptable, according to the survey.

Among those who are religiously unaffiliated, as many as 84% say

Continue reading “Half of U.S. Christians Say Sex is Sometimes, Always OK in Dating Relationships (2020)”

Female Komodo Dragon Conceives Without A Male Partner

Female Komodo Dragon Conceives Without A Male Partner

(Link): Female Komodo Dragon Conceives Without A Male Partner

By Melissa Malamut

Sorry, Kadal, you are not the father!

When the Chattanooga Zoo announced last September that Charlie, the zoo’s female Komodo dragon, birthed three hatchlings, zoo staff weren’t exactly sure how Charlie conceived.

Did she breed with Kadal, the zoo’s male dragon, with whom she was placed in the hopes that they’d mate? Or would she reproduce all on her own?

Turns out, Charlie doesn’t need a man, thank you very much.

Continue reading “Female Komodo Dragon Conceives Without A Male Partner”