The Horrible, Sexist Advice And Attitude Behind the ‘How Do I Approach A Girl With Headphones In?’ Post from the Absolute Ability Blog

The Horrible, Sexist Advice And Attitude Behind the ‘How Do I Approach A Girl With Headphones In?’ Post from the Absolute Ability Blog

I’m not a feminist.

But if you spend so much as ten minutes skimming over articles and blog posts about women, especially ones by feminists, you will discover on posts about what turns women off when, how, and why men approach them, that 99.9% of women, who are publicly using headphones, do not enjoy being approached when they have headphones or earplugs in.

Many women on forums and blogs have quite plainly said that they put on headphones in public precisely to use as a “Do Not Disturb Me” sign, as in, “I don’t want men to chat with me, ask me out, or flirt with me right now. I want to be left alone.” (I have a list of links to such comments, editorials, and blog posts farther below.)

But do the guys at this “Absolute Ability” blog below, which appears to be some kind of dating advice or P.U.A. (pick up artist) type site care about women’s stated preferences and explanations for their behavior?

Why no, they do not.

These men assume they know better than women what women want.

So, the short answer to the question, “How do I approach a girl wearing headphones” is – you do not.

(By the way, I am a woman. You can take my word over what men on a blog have to say about women.)

Do not take a woman wearing headphones as a challenge to overcome. It is not.

Do not view a woman’s “no” as an invitation to keep trying, to keep pestering her. Back off.

One clue that anyone and everyone should avoid taking dating or relationship advice from Tony D, is this Tweet on (Link): Tony’s Twitter (this is his Twitter linked to from his dating advice blog):

(Link): Tweet source (@TonyDAbsolute)

The Tweet by Tony reads:

I was sexually assaulted by Obama in the early, no mid, no early 90’s. Can’t remember when, where, how I got there, how I got back, and none of my friends I named remember it, or remember meeting him. But he’s definitely guilty. #touchedbyObama #BrettKavanaugh
–(end quote)–

Regardless of where one stands politically (I am moderately conservative), it shows a great deal of immaturity and insensitivity, and some sexism, to mock any woman who comes forward to say she was sexually assaulted – and note that Tony is also misusing the “me too” hash tag in his tweet.

Any man who thinks it’s acceptable to ridicule an alleged sexual assault victim, to mock sexual assault of women generally, is not a man to be taking dating advice from.

He clearly does not respect women, and if a man wants more success in dating, and if a man wants a lasting, healthy relationship with a woman, he will have to at a minimum, generally respect women.

Tony is also apparently a (Link): fan of Jordan Peterson, whom despite what his admirers think (and yes, I am familiar with Peterson’s work in context), holds to some sexist ideals and is in favor of traditional gender stereotypes for men and women, many of which elevate men at the expense of women.

Tony also tweeted on his Twitter (link) that

This is why the left is losing, and will continue to. They’re bullies and morons. twitter.com/SourcedReports–(end quote)–

Mmm. Now, I am a right wing woman (and yes I do believe that some liberals some of the time can behave like bullies), but Tony’s blog, from what I recall, does not say he is in the business of helping right wing men approach right wing women.

Well, considering that a lot of women are liberals and vote Democrat, how does Tony expect a man of whatever political persuasion, being able to approach  liberal or Democrat women for a date, when he holds them in such low esteem, and I’m sure that attitude would likely color his dating advice?

Or is Tony D. expecting male readers on his blog to approach only conservative women for dates? And how are those single men going to know which women are conservatives, if they’re not, for instance, wearing a M.A.G.A. ball cap?

Continue reading “The Horrible, Sexist Advice And Attitude Behind the ‘How Do I Approach A Girl With Headphones In?’ Post from the Absolute Ability Blog”

Man Steals Car From Date To Go On Another Date

Man Steals Car From Date To Go On Another Date

(Link):  Memphis man ‘steals his date’s car’ to go on another one… with her GODSISTER

(Link): Man steals date’s car, then uses it for another date

(Link): Man Steals Care From Date To Go On Another Date

July 2018

A woman in Memphis says her date stole her car so that he could take out another woman.

Faith Pugh says it happened on Saturday when she went to meet Kelton Griffin for dinner.

Continue reading “Man Steals Car From Date To Go On Another Date”

Woman Sues Dating Agency After They Fail to Find Her a Rich Husband

Woman Sues Dating Agency After They Fail to Find Her a Rich Husband

I do think that some dating sites (or agencies) are guilty of what this woman claims – she said before she paid up to join, the dating agency showed her photos of eligible men that she was interested in, but once she paid them money, they didn’t match her up with those men.

Back when a friend talked me into joining dating sites, I joined one and paid for a few months. During that time, I was sent about one match per month. The minute my membership expired, the site stopped sending me matches.

This went on for a few years until I just deleted my profile on there. I think they had plenty of matches for me but didn’t want to set me up with them until and unless I paid up membership fees again.

(Link): Woman Sues Dating Agency After They Fail to Find Her a Rich Husband

June 2018

A woman is suing an ‘exclusive’ dating agency for damages after she failed to find a rich husband to have a child with.

Tereza Burki, 46, went to Seventy Thirty Ltd in a hunt for ‘possibly the man of my dreams, the father of my child’, she told The High Court.

But the divorced mum-of-three claims she was let down by the agency, which she says enticed her with extravagant marketing claims about how many ‘wealthy, eligible, available men’ it had on its books.

The management consultant is now suing the agency for return of the £12,600 membership fee she paid and additional damages for ‘distress, upset, disappointment and frustration.

The Knightsbridge-based agency – which claims on its website to be the ‘ultimate network of influential and exceptional single people’ – is is counter-suing for £75,000, claiming libel over scathing reviews she published online.

They said that out of 9,000 clients they had on their books, 70 of them fit Miss Burki’s criteria. Each of these had a ‘high net worth’ and she was offered six matches, all who were in the same age bracket and were open to having children.

Continue reading “Woman Sues Dating Agency After They Fail to Find Her a Rich Husband”

Tips For Defensive Dating, Including Warning Signs that You Could Be The Target Of An Online Romance Scam – From the WSJ

Tips For Defensive Dating, Including Warning Signs that You Could Be The Target Of An Online Romance Scam – From the WSJ

(Link):  Tips For Defensive Dating, Including Warning Signs that You Could Be The Target Of An Online Romance Scam

Excerpts:

Here are tips for defensive dating, including warning signs that you could be the target of an online romance scam

ByKatherine Bindley

March 15, 2018 11:55 a.m. ET14 COMMENTS

More and more people are looking for love online. A large chunk are those age 50 to 64, and dating services aimed at baby boomers are expected to grow the most over the next five years.

You know who else is prowling around websites and apps, looking to score? Scammers.

Last year, more than 15,000 victims lost some $210 million in “confidence frauds” and romance scams, according to the Federal Bureau of Investigation.

Know Where Scammers Lurk
Scammers don’t limit their hunting grounds to old-school dating sites like Match.com. They’re trolling for victims on any number of apps, even ones that aren’t associated with dating, such as the Scrabble-like online social game Words With Friends, according to the Better Business Bureau’s Scam Tracker.

Continue reading “Tips For Defensive Dating, Including Warning Signs that You Could Be The Target Of An Online Romance Scam – From the WSJ”

Man Sues ‘Luxury’ Dating Service After Shelling Out $71K Per Date

(Link): Man Sues ‘Luxury’ Dating Service After Shelling Out $71K Per Date

By Kathianne Boniello

Jan 21, 2018

A Manhattan man who hired a “luxury” dating service to help him find love instead found a money pit, a lawsuit claims.

The Washington, DC-based matchmaker Taylor Francois-Bodine says she helps the lovelorn “accelerate” their hunt for romance with her “luxury experience” and claims her clientele includes “senators, congress people, ambassadors, well-known sports figures, industry leaders, CEOs and Fortune 500 executives.”

Continue reading “Man Sues ‘Luxury’ Dating Service After Shelling Out $71K Per Date”

Is Your Online Date Deadly? Here’s How To Spot The Red Flags from Infomania

Is Your Online Date Deadly? Here’s How To Spot The Red Flags -from InfoMania

(Link): Is Your Online Date Deadly? Here’s How To Spot The Red Flags

To see the entire list of tips, please use the link above and visit their site. This is only a partial list:

Excerpts:

by H. Redlitz

Did you know that. . .

  • 10% of sex offenders use online dating sites
  • 3% of online daters are psychopaths
  • 51% of online daters are already in a relationship
  • 10% of members on free dating websites are scammers
  • Since 1995, 400 people have been murdered by someone they met online

Considering these stats, the grim reality is that if you date online, you’re likely to run into a few freaky fish before you find a good catch.

But for some women, meeting Mr. Wrong can be the last mistake they ever make. Nadine Aburas, Tori Ann Pennington, Julissa Brisman – these are just some of the women who have been murdered in recent years by men they met online. The list of women who have been raped or sexually assaulted by online dates is even longer.

Online dating is now a normal part of our social lives, but how do you protect yourself or a loved one from the dangers of meeting strangers online? Watch out for these red flags of online dating.

Read Between The Lines Of Their Dating Profile

… (Link): FBI profiler Mary Ellen O’Toole, who worked on notorious cases such as the Green River Killer and the hunt for the Unabomber, advises online daters to pay attention to the wording used in dating profiles.

Continue reading “Is Your Online Date Deadly? Here’s How To Spot The Red Flags from Infomania”

Man Who Tricked Tinder Dates Out of $50,000 With Bogus Sob Stories Jailed

Man Who Tricked Tinder Dates Out of $50,000 With Bogus Sob Stories Jailed

(Link): Man Who Tricked Tinder Dates Out of of $50,000 With Bogus Sob Stories Jailed

I love the sub-heading for this:

They swiped right and he swiped their cash

LOL. Here’s the rest of the article (excerpts from it):

by Chelsea Ritschel

Think your Tinder matches have been bad? They’ve got nothing on Brandon Kiehm, the notorious ‘Tinder Swindler’ who’s now behind bars.

The sentence comes after Kiehm pleaded guilty to conning three women he matched with on the dating app into handing over £50,000 ($37,000)

Continue reading “Man Who Tricked Tinder Dates Out of $50,000 With Bogus Sob Stories Jailed”

Woman Who Paid $150K for Dating Service Sues After Meeting ‘Married Men And Criminals’

Woman Who Paid $150K for Dating Service Sues After Meeting ‘Married Men And Criminals’

This does sound like a very crummy dating service.

(Link): Ex-QVC honcho shopped for love, then sued her matchmaker

(Link):  Woman Who Paid $150K for Dating Service Sues After Meeting ‘Married Men And Criminals’

by McAteer

August 2017

A retired corporate executive claims a high-end matchmaking service set her up with a string of highly unsuitable men, according to a lawsuit.

Darlene Daggett, former president for US commerce for the home shopping channel QVC, says she paid $150,000 for the service but was set up with married or mentally unstable men. Some were even convicted criminals, reports philly.com.

Continue reading “Woman Who Paid $150K for Dating Service Sues After Meeting ‘Married Men And Criminals’”