Mom Blows $10K on Veneers, Botox While Refusing Kids’ Christmas Gifts

Mom Blows $10K on Veneers, Botox While Refusing Kids’ Christmas Gifts

And yet, in spite of headlines I see like the one below, via the New York Post, the Al Mohlers, Bradford Wilcoxes, and other Christian and conservative marriage and parenthood promoters keep on peddling these lies about marriage and parents, such as (but not limited to),
marriage and parenthood makes people more ethical, godly, responsible, giving, and loving, and marriage (Link): and parenthood makes people humans (we’re not human until we procreate – Jesus never procreated, so I guess he was an in-human, sub-species loser by those standards).

(Link): Mom Blows $10K on Veneers, Botox While Refusing Kids’ Christmas Gifts – New York Post

Dec 17, 2020
By Lia Eustachewich

A self-obsessed mom in the UK is making Christmas jingle hell this year by blowing $10,000 on herself — and refusing to spend a single penny on her two children.

Carla Bellucci, 38, boasted about using a stocking full of cash for new veneers, Botox, manicures, facials and brand new duds ahead of Christmas Day, while demanding that her kids, Tanisha, 15, and Jayden, 13, make their own money if they want gifts under the tree.

Continue reading “Mom Blows $10K on Veneers, Botox While Refusing Kids’ Christmas Gifts”

Man Accused of Dismembering, ‘Boiling’ Parents Who Cut Him Off Financially

Man Accused of Dismembering, ‘Boiling’ Parents Who Cut Him Off Financially

The phrase “family values” many not be necessarily un-biblical or anti-biblical, but it’s not taught in the Bible.

So many Christian persons or conservative organizations keep promoting this idea that Nuclear Families are necessary for a society to thrive. I’m not opposed to the Nuclear Family, I don’t want to abolish the Nuclear Family, but I don’t agree with the idea that the Nuclear Family is necessary for a culture, or that it (and marriage and parenthood) are necessary to make a person good or mature.

I see news headlines like the one below, and I realize that belonging to a Nuclear Family doesn’t make a person good, ethical, or wonderful.

A person can be a part of a Nuclear Family and still be a cold-blooded killer. So obviously, something else is going on here – the Jesus of the Bible said it has to do with individual sin – not marital or family status.

The Jesus of the Bible did not teach that the Nuclear Family will save a person or a culture. But Christians sure do keep behaving as though it will.

Did being a member of a Nuclear Family make this man in this news story, Joel Guy Jr, more loving, ethical, responsible or godly? Nope, it sure did not.

If you kill your mom over financial grievances and boil her head in a pot, I think it’s fair to say you’re an evil piece of garbage and that being in a “nuclear family” did nothing to instill character in you.

(Link): ‘Flush chunks down toilet not garbage disposal and blast heat to melt off fingerprints’: The chillingly detailed notebook of US son accused of dismembering his parents and boiling his mother’s head in a pot

(Link): Man Accused of Dismembering, ‘Boiling’ Parents Who Cut Him Off Financially

(Alternate news source: (Link): KNEWZ)

by WND News Services
Sept 28, 2020

‘The most horrific thing I’ve ever encountered in police work – in my life’

(KNEWZ) — A trial has begun for Joel Guy Jr. — a man accused of murdering and dismembering his parents for cutting him off financially, then trying to chemically dissolve their bodies to cover up the crime.

According to the Knoxville News Sentinel, a jury has been seated for the trial of Joel Guy Jr., who stands accused of murdering his mother Lisa Guy, 55, and his father Joel Guy Sr., 61.

Authorities claim that Guy Jr’s parents told him during the 2016 Thanksgiving holiday that they would be cutting him off financially. The son denies the charges and has pleaded not guilty.

Continue reading “Man Accused of Dismembering, ‘Boiling’ Parents Who Cut Him Off Financially”

Mega Church Preacher Bill Hybels in Trouble Again For More Sexual Harassment

Mega Church Preacher Bill Hybels in Trouble Again For More Sexual Harassment (2018)

I don’t think I ever blogged about this Hybels guy before.

He was first in the news many months ago for sexually harassing several different women in his church years before, who had worked as church staff.

His church first denied that this was true, and they attempted to say the women who stepped forward to discuss their harassment or abuse by this guy were lying.

There are so many of these pervy pastors it’s hard to keep up with them all. If all I ever did was blogged about perverted pastors, it would be a full time job, and I’d never have a break from this blog!

I’m pretty sure that Hybels is a married guy, too. Christians keep teaching that marriage is necessary to make a person a godly, responsible adult, and to keep them out of sexual sin, but as we see (yet once again!) marriage does not necessarily instill character into anyone, nor does it keep anyone from sexual sin or from sexually abusing others.

Let this story also go to show that a person does NOT have to become perfect, godly, or sinless to “earn” a spouse from God.

Yes, there are some Christians out there who teach that if you are single and want to get married, God will with-hold your spouse from you unless you become more godly, mature, or whatever quality. As  you can see from news reports such as this one, that is total bunk.

God did not withhold a spouse from Hybels (again, I’m fairly certain he has a wife), even though God had to know what a pervert the man is.

(Link): He’s a Superstar Pastor. She Worked for Him and Says He Groped Her Repeatedly.

Excerpts:

Bill Hybels built an iconic evangelical church outside Chicago. A former assistant says that in the 1980s, he sexually harassed her.

SOUTH BARRINGTON, Ill. — After the pain of watching her marriage fall apart, Pat Baranowski felt that God was suddenly showering her with blessings.

She had a new job at her Chicago-area megachurch, led by a dynamic young pastor named the Rev. Bill Hybels, who in the 1980s was becoming one of the most influential evangelical leaders in the country.

Continue reading “Mega Church Preacher Bill Hybels in Trouble Again For More Sexual Harassment”

Focus on the Family Defends IRS Classification as a ‘Church,’ Says It’s Meant to Protect Donors

Focus on the Family Defends IRS Classification as a ‘Church,’ Says It’s Meant to Protect Donors

While I am not against the “nuclear family” per se, I am very much in opposition to how Christians and other conservatives have turned the nuclear family into an idol.

Conservatives revere the nuclear family (as well as natalism, motherhood, and marriage) to the detriment and exclusion of the childless, the infertile, the child-free, the widowed, the divorced, and the never married – anyone who does not fit their nauseating, preferred structure of society.

Christians don’t just “focus” on the family, they WORSHIP it – which is a sin. The Bible tells you not to put anything or anyone above your devotion to Jesus Christ, not even your flesh and blood family, but Christians ignore this.

(Link): Focus on the Family Defends IRS Classification as a ‘Church,’ Says It’s Meant to Protect Donors

By Michael Gryboski , Christian Post Reporter | Apr 20, 2018 11:39 AM

Focus on the Family is defending its decision to have the Internal Revenue Service officially reclassify the Christian nonprofit as a “church,” denouncing the efforts of some to ascribe “sinister” intentions to the change.

An article published in February by the liberal group People for the American Way’s Right Wing Watch site documenting Focus on the Family’s reclassification has been getting extensive attention in recent weeks.

Continue reading “Focus on the Family Defends IRS Classification as a ‘Church,’ Says It’s Meant to Protect Donors”

The Dangerous Risks of Putting Motherhood on a Pedestal by C. Millard

The Dangerous Risks of Putting Motherhood on a Pedestal by C. Millard

The Dangerous Risks of Putting Motherhood on a Pedestal by C. Millard

Excerpts:

…Note the double-edged sword of motherhood here. Attracting the praise of being a “good mother” was always accompanied by the threat that you might fall from the perch at any moment and cause devastating harm to your child.

Hence the amplification of mechanisms of control, censure, and punishment that go hand in hand with the valorization and surveillance of parenting. Deep within the medical and psychological frameworks promoting motherhood in this period, there lurks male anxiety over female power and influence.

Continue reading “The Dangerous Risks of Putting Motherhood on a Pedestal by C. Millard”

Exploding the Myth of the Traditional Family by E. Hines

Exploding the Myth of the Traditional Family

(Link): Exploding the Myth of the Traditional Family by E. Hines

Excerpts

  • ….But today, most families hardly fit that [nuclear family] mold. Fifty percent of American adults are unmarried and 41 percent of children in America are born to unmarried parents.
  • That is an indication that the very concept of family is evolving, as more and more people realize that there are any number of ways to build good and functioning familial units.

Continue reading “Exploding the Myth of the Traditional Family by E. Hines”

James Dobson’s Flawed Take on Population Decline (no.1: We’re Not in Decline) by T. Grant

James Dobson’s Flawed Take on Population Decline (no.1: We’re Not in Decline) by T. Grant

As this report notes (link is much farther down this blog page), more pressure is placed on WOMEN to marry and have children than is placed on MEN.

I know that culture and Christians can treat single / celibate / childless men like trash, but they are TEN TIMES worse on Christian WOMEN in these regards.

Women get far more pressured to marry and have kids than men do or ever will.

Women get more shamed and insulted by Christians (and at times, secular culture) for staying single, celibate, and childless than males ever are.

Just because most women are capable of carrying a baby inside them, society and churches think it’s their DUTY to have a baby (as though women serve no other purpose in life), and if they choose to opt out (or cannot have a kid), they are still marginalized or insulted for it.

Men don’t face nearly as much insult or pressure to have kids as women do.

I am right of center – but I agree with this left wing (liberal) guy that other right wingers such as Dobson’s real goal is to be against what he perceives as liberal threats to the church or culture. That is one very real motivator some right wingers have, in why they do things like harass women to have children.

I also want to say how utterly moronic I find this approach by Dobson.

Continue reading “James Dobson’s Flawed Take on Population Decline (no.1: We’re Not in Decline) by T. Grant”

Ten Worst Sex and Romance Tips from the Christian Right

10 Worst Sex and Romance Tips from the Christian Right

I take it that this is a left wing site (I’m right wing). But some of their points are right on the money, at least on this page. Some of the points it touches on are the “equally yoked” belief among Christians, but I didn’t include the “equally yoked” parts of the list..

(Link): 10 Worst Sex and Romance Tips from the Christian Right by Katie Halper

Here are a few excerpts from the page, with a few comments be me far below all this:

  • 3. Understand That Men Have This Thing Called Sex Drive
  • Another gem from Focus on the Family is the Jill Slattery essay (Link):Sex Is a Physical Need,” which should really be called “Sex Is a Physical Need for Men.”
  • She explains to her female readers, “One of the biggest differences between you and your husband is the fact that he experiences sex as a legitimate physical need. Just as your body tells you when you’re hungry, thirsty, or tired, your husband’s body tells him when he needs a sexual release. Your husband’s sexual desire is impacted by what’s around him but is determined by biological factors, specifically the presence of testosterone in his body.”
  • So, imagine if your vagina were hungry. That’s what it would feel like.

Continue reading “Ten Worst Sex and Romance Tips from the Christian Right”

New Study (2014) Says Women More Stressed By Home Than Work

New Study (2014) Says Women More Stressed By Home Than Work

But so many Christians portray stay at home wife and motherhood as being bliss for women. Come to find out, women don’t always enjoy being SAHMs.

(Link): Why You’re More Stressed by Home Than Work

Excerpt:

    by Belinda Luscombe
    May 22, 2014

    A new study out from the Council on Contemporary Families suggests that contrary to most surveys, people are actually more stressed at home than at work.

    Three Penn State researchers measured people’s cortisol, which is a stress marker, while they were at work and while they were at home and found it higher at what is supposed to be a place of refuge.

    “Further contradicting conventional wisdom, we found that women as well as men have lower levels of stress at work than at home” writes one of the authors, Sarah Damaske, assistant professor of labor and employment relations, sociology and women’s studies at Penn State (the italics are hers).

    In fact women even say they feel better at work, she notes. “It is men, not women, who report being happier at home than at work.”

    Another surprise is that the findings hold true, says Damaske, for both those with children and without, but more so for nonparents. This is why, the authors conclude, people who work outside the home have better health.

    What the study doesn’t measure is whether people are still doing work when they’re at home, whether it’s household work or work brought home from the office. For many men, the end of the workday is a time to kick back. For women who stay home, they never get to leave the office.

    And for women who work outside the home, they often are playing catch up with household tasks.

    With the blurring of roles, and the fact that the home front lags well behind the workplace in making adjustments for working women, it’s not surprising that women are more stressed at home.

    But it’s not just a gender thing. At work, people pretty much know what they’re supposed to be doing: working, earning money, doing the tasks they have to do in order to draw an income.

    The bargain is very pure: employee puts in hours of physical or mental labor and employee draws out life-sustaining moola.

———————–
Related posts:

(Link): The Changing American Family (article)

(Link): The Jetson Fallacy – Much longer lifespans could explode the nuclear family (article)

(Link): Widows and Childless and Childfree Have Better Well Being Than Married Couples and Parents says new study

(Link): 5 Scientifically Proven Reasons It’s Better To Be Single

(Link): More single dads than ever head US households

(Link): Remarriage rates plunge as divorced Americans have doubts – and about Christian culture and divorce and remarriage vs singleness

(Link): (Articles) Marriage Rate At All Time Low

(Link): False Christian Teaching: “Only A Few Are Called to Singleness and Celibacy” or (also false): God’s gifting of singleness is rare – More Accurate: God calls only a few to marriage and God gifts only the rare with the gift of Marriage

(Link) Family Is Not a Norman Rockwell Painting, Christians: Man kept dead mom in freezer for 3 years, cashed her Social Security checks: cops

Guest on Christian Radio Show, Focus on the Family’s Mr. Daly, Claims Churches and Culture Don’t Spend Enough Money and Attention on Marriage and Family – Should I Laugh or Cry?

Guest on Christian Radio Show, Focus on the Family’s. Mr. Daly, Claims Churches and Culture Don’t Spend Enough Money and Attention on Marriage and Family – Should I Laugh or Cry?

I was listening to the Janet Mefferd radio program a few days ago, and she interviewed a Christian man from some family values group, I think Focus on the Family.

Mr. Daly sounds like a nice gentleman, but he is living in an alternate reality.

I meant to blog on this earlier but pushed it aside. I think this was the show:
(Link): Janet Mefferd – Jim Daly as guest, “The Good Dad”

Daly – if I heard correctly and understood correctly said that marriage or married couples do not get enough support from churches and/or the culture.

Daly (if I recall correctly) said churches/society need to devote more time and more resources to marriage and married couples.

I just re-listened to the show.

Yes, starting at the 18:50 mark, Daly tells Ms. Mefferd (this is a paraphrase),

    Why should society cater to the one to two percent of the culture? 80 to 90% of us will marry and have children. We are the core of culture. What about us?

I’m not sure what he means by the “one or two percent.”

Does he mean never married adults? Does he mean childless married couples? Or widowers? The divorced? Homosexuals, especially the ones insisting on the legalization of homosexual marriage?

As to his 80 to 90 percent figure: I don’t think that is correct. I don’t know where he is getting that from.

Even if 80% of the American population gets married at some point, they are bound to be single again via our high divorce rates or via widowhood. But I don’t think the 80% number is correct.

Edited to add this link:

Here’s why I think his figures may be incorrect:

    According to census data released in 2005, only 23.7 percent of all Americans households are married couples with children.

  • “Faith and Family in America,” a 2005 analysis by University of Akron sociologist John C. Green, says only 18.5 percent of all families meet the traditional nuclear family ideal: married, never divorced, with children at home.
  • The largest demographic (25.6 percent) is childless couples.
  • Church leaders uphold the former model as the ideal Christian family, but the statistics indicate they are chasing the wind.
  • In some denominations, such as the Episcopal Church, fully half of the members are single. (p 93)
    ____________________________
    Source: Duin, Juila. Quitting Church.

And from census.gov,

  • Single Life
    103 million
  • Number of unmarried people in America 18 and older in 2012.
  • This group made up 44.1 percent of all U.S. residents 18 and older.
  • Source: America’s Families and Living Arrangements: 2012
    (Link): Source
  • See also
    (Link): The Changing American Family (article)

    (Link): Single? You’re Not Alone (date of article: 2010)

    Excerpt:

      There are 96 million people in the United States who have no spouse.

    • That means 43 percent of all Americans over the age of 18 are single, according to the U.S. Census Bureau.

    Continue reading “Guest on Christian Radio Show, Focus on the Family’s Mr. Daly, Claims Churches and Culture Don’t Spend Enough Money and Attention on Marriage and Family – Should I Laugh or Cry?”

    Mefferd Guest Focus on the Family Spokesperson Stanton Incredulous that Preachers Push Kids To Marry Early

    Mefferd Guest Incredulous that Preachers Push Kids To Marry Early

    I will be tweeting a link to this to Janet Mefferd.

    Mrs. Mefferd (if she is reading this at all!), I realize this post is way long.

    However, I would appreciate it if you would read it and really take to heart and consider what it is saying, and maybe take the time to look over the links to other materials I’ve provided. The evangelical and Baptist and Reformed churches are alienating and hurting a lot of celibate, single adults.

    And for anyone else reading, today, I am blogging about this:
    (Link): (Janet Mefferd Show) Hour 2- Glenn Stanton from Focus on the Family discusses divorce rates. AUDIO.

    Today, at least 44% of the American adult population is single [Sept 2016 update: as of 2014, according to various news sources, that figure is now 51% or higher]. This includes a big chunk of Christian women over 30, 40 who would like to marry, but marriage is not happening for them.

    Evangelicals, however, continue to ignore these singles to harp on (nuclear) family, marriage, and babies.

    And yes, Evangelicals are pushing for Early Marriage. They are not helping the over-30 singles, but ignoring them and advising 18 year olds to marry now.

    I sent Janet Mefferd (Christian radio show host) an e-mail several months ago alerting her to some of the un-biblical, strange, and insulting views of adult, celibate, Christian singles that are held and taught by married Christians – even by famous Christians, such as Southern Baptist Al Mohler – but I got no reply from her.

    I have no idea if Mrs. Mefferd read my e-mail or saw it. I used the “contact form” at her site to send her the message.

    I don’t always agree with Mrs. Mefferd on all issues, but I do like her on a personal level, I sometimes feel a bit grouchy with her if I feel she’s falling into the “family idolatry” trap that is so pervasive among evangelicals and other Christians…
    But I do appreciate that Mefferd thinks Christians should actually expect other self professing believers to walk the Christian walk.

    Because when it comes to virginity and sexual purity – though I myself am an ACTUAL virgin past my 40s (since I have not married) – I am now seeing a Christian culture that runs from ‘Laissez-faire’ on sexual ethics to bashing and attacking the concept of virginity and adult virgins themselves. Here are just a link or two (more links at end of this post):

      (Link):

    No Christians and Churches Do Not Idolize Virginity and Sexual Purity – Christians Attack and Criticize Virginity Sexual Purity Celibacy

    (Link): The Christian and Non Christian Phenomenon of Virgin Shaming and Celibate Shaming

    One of several reasons I am drifting towards agnosticism after having been a devout Christian since youth has to do with this very topic: Christians being hypocrites, especially on these sexual issues.

    Here I stayed a virgin into adulthood, trying to stay true to the faith and the Bible’s teachings (that is, I am a LITERAL virgin, not one of those fornicators who calls herself a “born again” or “spiritual” or “secondary” virgin, puh-leaze).

    And instead of getting acknowledged for remaining sexually pure into middle age (notice that mothers in churches get carnations, they get recognized, on Mother’s Day, etc, what do virgin, adult women get? Nothing, that’s what, no sermons, no flowers, nothing), nor do I get support (emotional, practical, or financial support) from Christians during my celibate, adult singleness.

    I am getting blamed and bashed for being a virgin past 40, or totally ignored (links about this below).

    False teachings about celibacy, adult singleness, and sex abound in Christendom these days, even among conservative evangelicals, but not many Christians care or even notice.

    Even when I alert other Christians to this information, they do not seem to care.

    Evangelical, Reformed, Fundamentalist, and Baptist Christians do NOT esteem virginity or celibacy for anyone who is over 25 years of age but actually attack both concepts. (Keep reading, I explain more below, with links to proof.)

    In this audio (see link to audio below), where Janet Mefferd interviews Stanton of Focus on the Family, Stanton disputes some recent findings by some study about divorce rates being higher among Protestant Christians.

    (I blogged about that study a few days ago, (Link): here).

    In this interview with Mefferd, Stanton says the researchers concluded that one reason for higher divorce rates among Protestant Christians is that Preachers encourage young people to marry early (ie, very young).

    Stanton laughed this claim off and said, “I have never heard such a thing, ha ha ha.”

    (Link): (Janet Mefferd Show) Hour 2- Glenn Stanton from Focus on the Family discusses divorce rates. AUDIO.

    But, the claim is TRUE.

    Just about a week ago, this young preacher named Deeter wrote a post encouraging people to marry young, and I wrote this rebuttal:

      (Link):

    Christian Early Marriage Position Advocates A Low View of Celibacy and Virginity and Adult Singleness – another example: Justin Deeter Blog about Early Marriage

    Yes, some preachers and branches of Christianity are most certainly advocating Early Marriage, to the point it has been editorialized about on “Christianity Today,” see:

      (Link):

    A Case Against Early Marriage by Ashley Moore (editorial from Christianity Today, excerpts on my blog)

    Other Christians, some of whom are authors, have commented on the phenomenon of preachers and churches advocating Early Marriage.
    Here are some examples (some of these pages are by me):

      (Link):

    A Response by (Christian author) Colon to (Christian) Regnerus Re: Misguided Early Marriage Propaganda

    (Link): Marrying Young – from “Stuff Christian Culture Likes,” by Stephanie Drury
    – Drury is, if I understand correctly, a former conservative evangelical, a “preacher’s kid,” who is now very liberal in her views of Christianity, but even she picked up on the “Early Marriage” trend among Christians

    (Link): The Nauseating Push by Evangelicals for Early Marriage
    (blog post by me, I think not too long after I began noticing the trend)

    Even right wing, Non Christians have jumped on the “kids should marry young” band wagon:
    (Link): Secular Media Also Pushing Early Marriage

    The reason some pastors are advocating Early Marriage is that they see high rates of fornication going on among self professing evangelical youth.

    Evangelicals, Reformed, Baptists, and other sorts of Christians, assume if they can get a teen Christian to marry at age 21, that pre marital sex will not be an issue, and that the rates or pre-marital sex among youth can be lowered.

    Continue reading “Mefferd Guest Focus on the Family Spokesperson Stanton Incredulous that Preachers Push Kids To Marry Early”

    Smalley (Focus on the Family Talking Head) Gives Interview about Talking to Children About Sex on Mefferd Show

    Smalley (Focus on the Family Talking Head) Gives Interview about Talking to Children About Sex on Mefferd Show

    The interview (given by G. Smalley from Christian group “Focus on the Family”) is rather dull, and Smalley gives rather vague, intellectual-sounding responses, none of which I perceive as being sufficient enough to convince most people to abstain from sex prior to marriage.

    One of the first falsehoods I spotted is that both Mefferd and her guest, Smalley, assume these teens they are talking about will get married one day. You know, I had hoped to be married. I assumed as young as age ten, eleven, that I’d be married by 30. I’m still not married and in my forties.

    Christian parents need to stop assuming that their kids will get married – because they might be 40, 45, 50, and still be single. So it’s not enough to think in terms of, “Oh golly, how do I convince Joe Jr. to wait until marriage for sex.” -What if Joe Jr. never meets the right woman, what if Joe Jr. grows up and never marries?

    Here’s the link to the interview:
    (Link): Greg Smalley from ‘Focus on the Family’ on How to Talk to Kids About Sex

    The part of the interview (around 12.49 – 13.00) where the guy says to the host (Mefferd) that he tells his kids about how hot his wife is (their mother) was strange.

    Smalley was saying he was using this method to model to his children how it’s important to wait ’til marriage to have sex. I’m not sure how emphasizing to your kids, if you are a married parent, how “hot” their mother is can convince them to remain celibate.

    I also believe that Smalley’s view on this matter is unwittingly upholding the Christian falsehood that marriage will always entail regular, hot, satisfying sex (see all the posts on this blog of numerous stories of people who were virgins until marriage, but the sex was either lousy or infrequent, or both lousy AND infrequent).

    Continue reading “Smalley (Focus on the Family Talking Head) Gives Interview about Talking to Children About Sex on Mefferd Show”