Why Are So Many Single Women Leaving the Church? by K. Gaddini

Why Are So Many Single Women Leaving the Church? by K. Gaddini

I have been blogging about this topic, and ones pertaining to it, for several years now. It’s no mystery to me why women have been leaving the church in droves the last ten or more years.

(If you’d like to see just a few of my posts explaining why the Christian faith, or more specifically, churches, are a huge turn-off to single women, please see some of the links to my other blog posts below in this post, under the “Related Posts” heading.)

However, most Christians only obsess over smaller numbers of MEN leaving church; they don’t seem to either notice or to care that single women have been dropping out as well.

One of the few things this article highlights is that the “equally yoked” rule is a waste of time for women of faith who’d like to be married.

If you are a Christian woman, and you’d like to marry, it is vital you give up a hope or strict rule of marrying only a Christian man – otherwise, you are more than likely to remain single.

Secondly, and obviously, too many churches have made marriage and parenthood into idols and benchmarks of adulthood, so that any woman who doesn’t marry or have kids is ignored or viewed and treated like a child. That needs to change. Single women should be valued and recognized in their singleness. 

I can also see how gender complementarianism (traditional gender roles) are also keeping these Christian women from getting married: they have internalized the idea that being anything other than the Christian gender complementarian woman (i.e., a passive doormat) hinders them from getting a husband, and worse yet, some of the men they’ve met in church actually do feel that way.

Christians need to toss out the regressive stereotypes (which are snuck into Christian teaching under heretical gender complementarian teachings) if they are truly concerned about declining marriage rates and would like to actually help marriage-minded single women to get married.

Not all women naturally fit into the gender complementarian ideal, which means they may not get married, if everyone insists all women must be gender comp to merit marriage. (The Bible does not hold up women being passive or being gender complementarian to merit a husband; it is church members who promote this false view.)

(Link): Why Are So Many Single Women Leaving the Church? by K. Gaddini

Excerpts:

…. It turns out that in both countries, single Christian women are leaving churches at increasingly high rates. In the UK, one study showed that single women are the most likely group to leave Christianity.

In the US, the numbers tell a similar story.

Of course, there is a distinction between leaving church and leaving Christianity, and these studies do not make the difference clear.

Regardless, leaving – whether it be your congregation or your faith — is a difficult decision. Women stand to lose their friends, their sense of identity, their community and, in some cases, even their family. And yet, many are doing it anyway.

What or who is driving them out?

Continue reading “Why Are So Many Single Women Leaving the Church? by K. Gaddini”

Pat Robertson’s Downer, Bad Advice to Gabby the Mid-30s, Never Married Lady Who’s Not Having Success with Dating Sites

Pat Robertson’s Downer, Bad Advice to Gabby the Mid-30s, Never Married Lady Who’s Not Having Success with Dating Sites

On February 25, 2020, Christian program “The 700 Club” had Pat Robertson answer a question from a mid-30s woman named Gabby who would like to get married, but to summarize her point, she says most of the men who identify as Christian on dating sites are tawdry, gross, etc.

So, she asks Robertson what to do – which is a big mistake.

I’ve said before on this blog that single adults (especially women) should (Link): stop asking Pat Robertson for relationship advice. Because nine out of ten times, his advice will be impractical, insensitive, and/or sexist.

You can listen to the lady co-host read Gabby’s letter, and listen to Pat Robertson’s advice to her around the 45 minute mark (Link): here (CBN’s site)

(They may eventually upload that Feb. 25, 2020 question to their (Link): “Honest Answers” channel on You Tube, I don’t know.)

From what I recall of the segment when I watched it on TV:

Pat Robertson pushes the “be equally yoked” garbage on Gabby, telling her that no matter how desperate she feels, no matter if she worries about becoming “an old maid,” to NOT marry a Non-Christian.

A bit later, Robertson goes on to tell Gabby that maybe God is keeping her single because God wants her all to himself.

I almost barfed and then threw a rock at my television set when I heard that.

Continue reading “Pat Robertson’s Downer, Bad Advice to Gabby the Mid-30s, Never Married Lady Who’s Not Having Success with Dating Sites”

The “Dating Market” Is Getting Worse by A. Fetters and K. Tiffany

The “Dating Market” Is Getting Worse b A. Fetters and K. Tiffany

For anyone who cannot wait to get to it, here’s the link to the piece on The Atlantic:

(Link): The ‘Dating Market’ Is Getting Worse

Some of my comments about that piece before I put in some excerpts from it:

About the only “numbers approach” I have ever mentioned on my own blog here is that Christian women really do unnecessarily limit themselves if they try to live out the “Be Equally Yoked” philosophy in regards to dating and marriage, because the reality is, yes, the math is that there are not enough single, Christian men to go around for all the Christian single women who’d like to marry.

So, it makes sense to forgo the “equally yoked” rule, if one is a Christian, to date outside the Christian faith.

At the same time, though, I have seen other adults singles make much too much out of the “numbers game” philosophy on dating sites or comments sections on blogs about dating, where they make finding a romantic life partner sound so cold, or as though they’re shopping for a car.

There’s nothing wrong with having standards, but I am afraid there is a category of single adult who is too stringent or unrealistic with their lists of “must haves.”

I am personally turned off by anyone dispensing dating or “how to get married” advice who behave  as though there is a sure-fire guarantee way to land a spouse – because (Link): there is no such thing.

So, I’m really turned off by the many (sexist) attitudes and lists out there telling women if only the women do X, Y, and Z, they will absolutely get married to a great guy.

One problem is that most of these lists (which go viral on Twitter) are predicated on the notion that all men want and prefer 1950s, submissive, uber-feminine women.

Well, I lived that way for many decades – I was raised in a very traditional family that was into conservative values – so I had many of those prized traits sexist men online say will grant a woman a husband, but I remain never-married into my late 40s.

I was a very meek, docile, passive, sweet woman with traditional values, and no, it didn’t get me a husband.

(As I’ve aged, I’ve realized that it’s not a healthy or safe dating strategy for a woman to fit the picture of docile, overly feminine, passive, etc, that the “dating advice” gurus suggest on twitter and elsewhere, because many abusive, selfish, or controlling men intentionally seek out women with such qualities so that they can control, abuse, or take advantage of them.)

There are many conservatives – including women authors, unfortunately – who keep writing dating advice books for women, or who go on to FOX cable news morning shows, who keep encouraging women to engage in these dangerous dating strategies (of being a doormat, where being “feminine” is associated with doormat behaviors), which I’ve written about before (Link): here and (Link): here, among other blog posts.

The article below states at one point that men out-number women on dating sites. That may be so on some sites, but certainly not all.

Years ago, I had a paid membership on a dating site, and the site was forever claiming they could find no matches for me, most of the time.

For the four or five month paid subscription I had, I was only linked up to a total of about three men in that time.

My research on that particular online dating company found it’s the same with a lot of women, as it had been for me: that site tends to only “dribble out” a tiny number of matches for women, while they send male members more matches per month, every month.

Here are excerpts from…

(Link): The ‘Dating Market’ Is Getting Worse

The old but newly popular notion that one’s love life can be analyzed like an economy is flawed—and it’s ruining romance.

It’s understandable that someone like Liz [a 30 year old single who is using dating apps to find dates] might internalize the idea that dating is a game of probabilities or ratios, or a marketplace in which single people just have to keep shopping until they find “the one.”

The idea that a dating pool can be analyzed as a marketplace or an economy is both recently popular and very old:
For generations, people have been describing newly single people as (Link): 
“back on the market” and (Link): analyzing dating in terms of supply and demand.

Continue reading “The “Dating Market” Is Getting Worse by A. Fetters and K. Tiffany”

Convicted Child Sex Creep Joined Church to Befriend Young Girls by S. Jackson

Convicted Child Sex Creep Joined Church to Befriend Young Girls by S. Jackson

News stories such as this one are one reason why I’m not entirely enthusiastic to advise Christian single women to look at churches as a venue to meet men to date and marry – there are too many weirdos, perverts, and abusers who attend churches, and you might end up with one, if you use churches are a place to meet other singles.

(Link): Convicted Child Sex Creep Joined Church to Befriend Young Girls

by S. Jackson
Sept 17, 2019

The pervert was caught dancing with a seven-year-old girl

A convicted child sex offender who joined a local church group and befriended young girls has been jailed.

Gordon Sanderson was caught dancing with a child after he became involved with the Baptist Church in Musselburgh, East Lothian, Scotland, last year.

Sanderson picked the child up and swung her around while also encouraging the girl to wrap her legs around his waist and place her arms around his shoulders, the Daily Record reports.

Continue reading “Convicted Child Sex Creep Joined Church to Befriend Young Girls by S. Jackson”

Christian Rock Star Arrested In Connection With Child Sex Assault Probe Before Going on Stage

Christian Rock Star Arrested In Connection With Child Sex Assault Probe Before Going on Stage

The article says that this Christian rock star has a son. So, this guy is a father. I would assume that the rock star was married at one point (unless he had his son out of wedlock).

I point this out to say that a lot of conservative Christians and conservative secular think tanks keep arguing that “family values” and being “pro marriage” and people having children will somehow “fix” the United States. No, it won’t.

First of all, no passage in the Bible argues that the way to “fix” culture is to have more marriage and more natalism – chapter seven in 1 Corinthians actually says it is better to remain single than it is to marry. The Bible says a person must be changed by accepting Jesus as her savior, not by getting married and having kids. The Bible doesn’t talk about cleaning up culture.

Secondly, personal observation. There are way too many married people with children we all know, or have read about who are selfish, rapists, child molesters, or into selling drugs and what all (see some examples of that on this blog (Link): here and (Link): here).

Marriage and parenthood are not guarantees of making a person more mature, ethical, godly, principled, and responsible – but conservatives keep arguing otherwise, and it’s a highly deceitful and unbiblical argument for them to continue to advance.

Please see the bottom of this post for more remarks by me.

(Link): Christian Rock Star Arrested In Connection With Child Sex Assault Probe Before Going on Stage

Excerpts:

By BRIAN NIEMIETZ
NEW YORK DAILY NEWS |
AUG 14, 2019 | 2:48 PM

A Christian rocker had to cancel his performance at eastern Minnesota’s Wood City Music Festival after Cloquet, Minn., cops arrested him on two charges of felony sex assault against a child, according to an ABC News affiliate in Duluth.

Continue reading “Christian Rock Star Arrested In Connection With Child Sex Assault Probe Before Going on Stage”

Study Says More American Couples Meet Online and in Bars Now than Through Family, Friends (2019)

Study Says More American Couples Meet Online and in Bars Now than Through Family, Friends (2019)

I think it’s sad, frustrating, and unfortunate for Christian singles who’d like to marry that so many churches and Christians do NOT want to take practical steps to help marriage-desiring singles to get married.

And as this study shows, when that happens, when friends, family, and church community refuse to get involved, people use bars and dating sites.

I don’t understand the Christians who promote the “Equally Yoked” rule and yet won’t help Christian singles who’d like to marry – if you’re an “Equally Yoked” advocate (I am not one), wouldn’t you want to ensure that your Christian single friend marries another Christian, rather than take her chances and dates Non-Christians she meets on dating sites and at night clubs?

(Link): Online dating, now the most common way for couples to meet, is desegregating America

(Link): Our Deepest Fears Realized: Most Couples Meet Online Now

Meeting online is trending upward, and fewer and fewer people are meeting at work, school, or through friends or family.

Continue reading “Study Says More American Couples Meet Online and in Bars Now than Through Family, Friends (2019)”

Children’s Pastor, Decorated Detective, Commits Suicide After Child Porn Found on Church Computer by L. Blair

Children’s Pastor, Decorated Detective, Commits Suicide After Child Porn Found on Church Computer, by L. Blair

Another example of why single Christian women should give up on the “equally yoked” rule concerning dating and marriage, and why, perhaps, churches are not a good place to find dates.

One of the articles below says that this guy was married – a lot of Christians teach that marriage is necessary to make people mature, godly, and ethical, but did being married make this guy who was caught with child porn any more godly and ethical? Nope.

Also, some “how to get married” type literature I used to read while growing up – stuff that was written by Christians – usually suggested that if you remain single past the age of 25 or 30, it’s because you are “lacking” in some way.

Such Christian authors would suggest that you’re too sinful or too messed up in some way, and God was trying to “clean you up” before “allowing” you to marry.

When you see news articles below, do you really think that rationale is true? If it’s true that God demands about 100% perfection and godliness before he will send someone a spouse, how is it that Christian pedophiles like the man in this article managed to marry, he had children, grandchildren, and he worked in a church?

Obviously, taking such news stories as the one below into account, God does not hold anyone to a certain standards before he “permits” them to marry or “sends” them a spouse.

(Link): Children’s Pastor, Decorated Detective, Commits Suicide After Child Porn Found on Church Computer

Excerpts:

A Florida police detective and children’s minister committed suicide after being investigated for having child pornography.

 

Detective Vernon Allan Richardson, a beloved (List): children’s minister and award-winning veteran officer with the Jacksonville Sheriff’s Office, known for his work in helping to locate missing children, killed himself Tuesday as authorities investigated him for possession of child pornography, some of which was found on his church computer.

Continue reading “Children’s Pastor, Decorated Detective, Commits Suicide After Child Porn Found on Church Computer by L. Blair”

Adult Pervert Ephebophile Preacher to His Teen Victim: “I believe God provided you for me until such time as I find a wife.”

Adult Pervert Ephebophile Preacher to His Teen Victim: “I believe God provided you for me until such time as I find a wife.”

If you’re wondering what the term “ephebophile” in this blog post’s title means, please visit (Link): this page on Wikipedia. (Ephebophiles are like pedophiles, only they prefer their victims to be a little older.)

I used to believe in the “equally yoked” teaching, until several years ago, when it dawned on me, one fact among a few, that many self-identifying Christian men in Christian marriages are (Link): perverts or abusers, so what advantage is there for Christian single women in only dating and marrying Christian men?

Further, there are way more single Christian women than there are single Christian men, so if you’re a single Christian woman who wants to marry, by necessity, you will HAVE TO date outside your faith. The “Equally Yoked” rule is simply not feasible or realistic for single Christian women who’d like to marry.

Anyway, this post below reminds me of (Link): another one I did on this blog a few years back, where a guy who was arrested for pedophilia had told a friend he was “wife shopping” for a new wife at his local church.

(Link): Five decades after alleged abuse, Texas man cheers proposed Baptists’ changes

Feb 21, 2019
By Corky Siemaszko

“Back then, nobody would have believed me. I have been carrying this around with me for a long time.”

Fifty years later, the words still burn in Henry Snow’s memory: “I believe God provided you for me until such time as I find a wife.”

They were uttered, Snow recalled, by the man who he says sexually molested him when he was 17 — and who was driving him home from Sunday services at a large Baptist church in Dallas.

Continue reading “Adult Pervert Ephebophile Preacher to His Teen Victim: “I believe God provided you for me until such time as I find a wife.””

Christians In Love With Non-Christians (and Their Christian “Friends” Who Object) by John Shore

Christians In Love With Non-Christians (and Their Christian “Friends” Who Object)

(Link): Christians In Love With Non-Christians (and Their Christian “Friends” Who Object)

Excerpts:

[The author reproduces some correspondence from Christian women who say they are or were dating Non-Christian men, but their Christian friends objected]

…You know what else is not a Christian thing to do (or what shouldn’t be, anyway)? Putting religious dogma ahead of being a friend.

Continue reading “Christians In Love With Non-Christians (and Their Christian “Friends” Who Object) by John Shore”

Pastor Accused of Choking Woman Pregnant With His Child at Southside Impact Church

Pastor Accused of Choking Woman Pregnant With His Child at Southside Impact Church

Lessons from this news story:

  • Equally Yoked is crap. Christian men are not necessarily more godly, mature, reliable, responsible than Non-Christian men, so single Christian women who’d like to marry should consider marrying Non-Christians
  •  Marriage does not make people more godly, mature, or sexually ethical – as so many Christians teach it does (assuming the guy in the story is or was married)
  • You do not have to obtain perfection or some lofty ideal before God will permit you to get married (many Christians teach if you’d like to marry but still find yourself single, it’s because God is intentionally with-holding a spouse from you because he’s preparing you, getting you ready, making you more Godly – all a bunch of bunk)

Even more atrocious is that this idiot markets himself as a “relationship expert” and has written dating or marital advice books for women! He’s an utter hypocrite.

The article keeps referring to the woman in the story as the “mother of so- and- so’s children,” so I take it they were not married, which I guess, means this preacher was guilty of fornication (sex outside of marriage)?

(Link): Pastor Accused of Choking Woman Pregnant With His Child at Southside Impact Church

Excerpts:

Jan 2019
by L. Blair

Rashan Lamar Wilson, lead pastor of Southside Impact Church in Charleston, South Carolina, was arrested and charged Monday for allegedly strangling the pregnant mother of his children until she passed out.

Wilson is the author of books such as “99 & 1/2 Things A Woman Needs From Her Man: How To Establish and Maintain a Healthy Relationship.”

Continue reading “Pastor Accused of Choking Woman Pregnant With His Child at Southside Impact Church”

Preacher John David Terry Murdered and Beheaded Friend to Fake Own Death (1987) – Equally Yoked Is Pointless

Preacher John David Terry Murdered and Beheaded Friend to Fake Own Death (1987) – Equally Yoked Is Pointless

Some Christians insist that single Christian women can and should marry only Christian men.

But why on earth should any Christian woman bother dating or marrying Christian men, when some of them do things like murder other people? See the news coverage below.

(Link): Trial Begins for Preacher Accused in Decapitation of Handyman – 1988

NASHVILLE, Tenn. (AP) _ A minister went on trial Monday on charges of beheading a handyman and burning down his church in an alleged attempt to assume a new identity and disappear with $50,000 in church money.

Jury selection is expected to take most of the week in the first-degree murder and arson trial of the Rev. John David Terry, who faces the death penalty if convicted.

Terry may take the witness stand to break his yearlong silence in the decapitation of James C. Matheny.

The slaying and fire on June 15, 1987, at Emmanuel Church of Christ Pentecostal Oneness stunned Terry’s parishioners. Some have stuck by him since Matheny’s body was found rolled up in a scorched carpet.

(Link): Preacher John David Terry Murdered and Beheaded Friend to Fake Own Death

This week “Grave Secrets” examines the case of Rev. John David Terry, a pastor who took a very dark path indeed.

Nashville, June 16, 1987, and the 44-year-old pastor is found dead after a fire at the church where he preached but the investigation soon reveals something is amiss.

 Terry’s path to crime partly stemmed from his feeling of having failed in life, a feeling he claimed became stronger after his mother died in 1983.

He then hatched a plan to fake his own death and befriended 32-year-old down on his luck father of one James C. Matheny.

He wanted to fake a robbery that would result in his heroic death and claimed that his plan was to include Matheny in the plot.

However, the detectives believe that he lured Matheny to the church and then shot him in the back of the head.

Continue reading “Preacher John David Terry Murdered and Beheaded Friend to Fake Own Death (1987) – Equally Yoked Is Pointless”

60 Year Old, Never- Married Woman Asks Christian TV Host Pat Robertson If Some Are Just Not Meant to Marry

60 Year Old, Never- Married Woman Asks Christian TV Host Pat Robertson If Some Are Just Not Meant to Marry

Below, in this post, is a video on You Tube, via ‘700 Club,’ uploaded on October 25, 2018, in which a 60 year old woman says she “never found a godly man to marry” and her church never has any men her age there.

She asks Robertson if some people are just never meant to marry.

As I’ve been saying on this blog for ages now, you cannot count on God, prayer, churches or Christians to fix you up with a spouse, because they won’t (churches will even shame and scold you for asking).

The woman says she’s never found a “godly” man to marry – I think that is Christian code-speak for “I haven’t found a Christian man to marry.” This woman has probably been brain-washed into accepting (Link): the “Equally Yoked” teaching.

Single ladies, if you are Christian and want marriage, the numbers are stacked against you, as I’ve explained in numerous posts before. You need to get away from this “I must marry a  Christian and only a Christian” belief, or you will end up in your 40s, never married like me, or like this 60 year old woman.

It’s better to find a kind-hearted, loving Non-Christian man to marry than end up at 60 never having been married because you could not find a compatible Christian man – there are no single Christian men in churches for you to meet and marry who are over age 30 and under age 80. They don’t attend church.

Continue reading “60 Year Old, Never- Married Woman Asks Christian TV Host Pat Robertson If Some Are Just Not Meant to Marry”

Singles Discrimination, Complementarianism, Equally Yoked Teaching, and Spotting Predators in Church Video

Singles Discrimination, Complementarianism, Equally Yoked Teaching, and Spotting Predators in Church Video

Someone in a Christian discussion group posted this video (and I don’t want to link to the group or mention it by name, though you may be able to figure out which one it is, especially if you are already familiar with it), and the Christians on the discussion board talked about it:

(Link): When A Predator Shows Up At Your Church — Here’s What You Do!

That same video has also been making the rounds on other Christian blogs, sites, forums, and on Twitter.

The video is around 18 minutes long. I watched it a few days ago.

The video features a Christian woman who says a 50-something guy showed up at her church, a man who set off red flags for her, due to his weird behavior around the kids who were there at the church, including her own.

The man behaved overly-familiar with her kid, other people’s kids who were there, and he ignored the parents of the kids.

(1) First, I’m going to discuss what I believe this video has to do with complementarianism.

(2) Then I am going to discuss some of the disturbing comments about adult singles that were made in the Christian discussion group where I saw this video posted to, and next,

(3) I’ll move on to discussing, as mentioned by a woman or two in the group, about the creepy behavior single adult women have to put up with, even at church, and what this has to do with the Christian “Equally Yoked” teaching.

Continue reading “Singles Discrimination, Complementarianism, Equally Yoked Teaching, and Spotting Predators in Church Video”

The One Thing Evangelical Leaders Don’t Want Christians to Know about Mixed-Faith Marriages (two links) by C. Cassidy

The One Thing Evangelical Leaders Don’t Want Christians to Know about Mixed-Faith Marriages (two links). by C. Cassidy

I do agree with the author that a lot of Christians demonize all atheists, which they should not do – but to be fair, many atheists I’ve run into online have been either unbearably smug or else they are out-right hostile to anyone who doesn’t share their particular take on theism or atheism.

I grew up in Southern Baptist Churches and was exposed to a lot of conservative Christian content around the home – Christian magazines, books, TV programs, and so on. Most of them went on and on about how sinful, unwise, or wrong it would be for a Christian to marry a Non-Christian, which they refer to as the “Equally Yoked” rule.

I used to be a believer in the “Equally Yoked” rule myself, until several years ago, when I began noticing several problems with it, one being there are more single Christian women then there are single Christian men, and, I’m all the time seeing news stories of Christian men who are jailed for child molesting, wife abuse, or what have you.

So, I realized it’s far more important to judge a man based on his actual actions and how he treats me (and treats other people) as opposed to what he claims to be his religious views.

At this stage of life, I’m more comfortable now with the idea of marrying a kind-hearted atheist man than a sexist or abusive Christian one.

Without further ado, here is the link with excerpts:

(Llnk): The One Thing Evangelical Leaders Don’t Want Christians to Know about Mixed-Faith Marriages.

The follow up post to that:

(Link): The Question that Breaks the Facade (in Mixed-Faith Marriages).

From

(Llnk): The One Thing Evangelical Leaders Don’t Want Christians to Know about Mixed-Faith Marriages.

[Summary: a Christian woman writes in for advice because her Christian husband of 20 years now says he’s an atheist. She’s not comfortable with his atheism but doesn’t want to divorce him]

…The idea of marrying a non-Christian is so far past unacceptable [to many Christians] that it veers into genuine revulsion and anathema.

I’ve got an old binder from a marriage seminar I attended at an SBC church in my mid-teens that painted non-believers as repulsive, ugly, dirty, unkempt people–in one illustration, a hobo-like non-believer is marrying a young woman in a perfect white bridal gown.

I’ve seen countless blog posts from Christian leaders openly wondering if non-Christians have the capacity to love at all, or can even conduct themselves in an honest and compassionate way.

Continue reading “The One Thing Evangelical Leaders Don’t Want Christians to Know about Mixed-Faith Marriages (two links) by C. Cassidy”

Tennessee Pastor Allegedly Rapes Teen at Worship Center

Tennessee Pastor Allegedly Rapes Teen at Worship Center

And it’s precisely news stories like this (and here are even more examples) that changed my mind into dumping the Christian “equally yoked” teaching, and pretty much disregarding my Christian set of parents advice about looking for a spouse in a church.

Why should I bother with either one of those teachings when so many church-attending Christian men are rapists, abusers, or other types of perverts? Here’s another example:

(Link): Tennessee Pastor Allegedly Rapes Teen at Worship Center

July 2018

by K. Lam

A Tennessee pastor was arrested Saturday after he allegedly raped a 17-year-old girl at a worship center, police said.

Continue reading “Tennessee Pastor Allegedly Rapes Teen at Worship Center”

Megachurch Pastor Les Hughey Admits ‘Sinning’ After 4 Women Accuse Him of Back Rubs, Sex

Megachurch Pastor Les Hughey Admits ‘Sinning’ After 4 Women Accuse Him of Back Rubs, Sex

Let us once more, for the millionth time on this blog, point out what Christian – and sometimes secular – conservatives get wrong (I am speaking here as a conservative myself, one who at times disagrees with other conservatives), in lieu of news stories like the one I am copying below:

-Marriage does not make people more godly, responsible, mature, or ethical

-God does not require a single adult who desires marriage to become pure, holy, godly, or perfect before he sends them a spouse

-The Christian “Equally Yoked” rule is unnecessary and too limiting for Christian women who’d like to marry, since there are not enough Christian single men for Christian single women to marry.
Furthermore, many Christian men turn out to be adulterers, pedophiles, wife abusers, and god only knows what else they are guilty of (see (Link): this list for examples), so that Christian single women are better off selecting a man to marry based on his actions and character, rather than his stated religious beliefs.

(Link): Megachurch Pastor Les Hughey Admits ‘Sinning’ After 4 Women Accuse Him of Back Rubs, Sex

Les Hughey, the founder of Highlands Church in Scottsdale, Arizona, has been placed on leave as the megachurch investigates accusations recently made by four women who say that he took sexual advantage of them when they were teenagers.

Hughey responded to the accusations, published in The Modesto Bee, on Saturday by admitting that inappropriate relationships did take place in the past, but insisted that they were of a consensual nature.

Continue reading “Megachurch Pastor Les Hughey Admits ‘Sinning’ After 4 Women Accuse Him of Back Rubs, Sex”

Pastor Greg Laurie’s Promotion of Equally Yoked Rule in Regards to Marriage Plays Role in Why So Many Christian Women Remain Single Over a Life Time

Pastor Greg Laurie’s Promotion of Equally Yoked Rule in Regards to Marriage Plays Role in Why So Many Christian Women Remain Single Over a Life Time

I’ve done more than one post on this blog high-lighting and explaining how and why the Christian insistence on the “equally yoked” rule in regards to marriage leaves many marriage-minded Christian single women single over a life time.

If you are a Christian single woman who wants to marry,  take it from me, who was once a very committed Christian who was “relying on the Lord” for a husband (and yes, I even tried dating sites at one time), you have to take marriage where you can find it, even if that means marrying a Non-Christian.

There are simply not as many single Christian men as there are women, and the Christian single men who exist may (Link): not be marriage material, to under-state things.

You really have to look at a man’s character, not what religious label he slaps on to himself. An atheist man, or a Jewish man, or a guy who practices Wicca, or what have you, may treat you better than a guy who says he’s a Christian and who also attends church regularly.

(Link): Greg Laurie Tells Christian Woman in Long-Term Relationship With Nonbeliever: ‘Break Up With Him!’

April 2018

Pastor Greg Laurie of Harvest Christian Fellowship in California recently advised a Christian woman who’s in a long-term relationship with a nonbeliever that she should break up with him.

Continue reading “Pastor Greg Laurie’s Promotion of Equally Yoked Rule in Regards to Marriage Plays Role in Why So Many Christian Women Remain Single Over a Life Time”

Abusers Hide In Churches – Equally Yoked Does Not Help Single Christian Women Who’d Like to Marry

Abusers Hide In Churches – Equally Yoked Does Not Help Single Christian Women Who’d Like to Marry

The “equally yoked” rule really makes no sense for single adult Christians, especially Christian women who’d like to marry, since (Link): so many self professing Christian men – even ones who read their Bibles daily or attend church weekly or work as pastors – are sexual deviants, wife abusers, or adulterers.

My parents taught me to seek out good mate material at local churches, because they felt the quality of people would be better at a church, as opposed to going to a bar to get dates with men.

However, I’ve seen far too many news stories of self professed Christian men who beat their wives, molest kids, or have been arrested for soliciting sex with animals, to think that Christian men are any more quality or safer than Non-Christian men. I also fail to see how churches are any safer to meet dates than a bar.

The whole post by Deborah Brunt is very good, but I only wanted to quote from part of it in my post:

(Link): Be wary of churches breaking the silence by Deborah Brunt

Excerpts:

[How churches and typical Christian preachers deal with sexual abuse in their churches]

Pastor-Man offers simple solutions for sexual abuse.

He calls men to be pure. He makes no distinction between the temptation to sexual sin, which both genders face, and the lifestyle of strong deception, sexual domination and violence that male abusers deliberately adopt.

Continue reading “Abusers Hide In Churches – Equally Yoked Does Not Help Single Christian Women Who’d Like to Marry”

After Threatening Suicide, Pastor Ronnie Gorton (Married to a Woman and a Father) Indicted on 47 Charges of Sexually Assaulting Boys

After Threatening Suicide, Pastor Ronnie Gorton (Married to a Woman and a Father) Indicted on 47 Charges of Sexually Assaulting Boys – Ditch the Equally Yoked Teaching, Christian Single Women!

I believe the article, which is linked to much farther below in this post, says that this child- raping pastor is married to a woman, and he and the woman have two or three of their own children.

Once more, contrary to what many to most conservative Christians and conservative think tanks teach, marriage does not make people more godly, loving, or mature. Being married to a woman did not stop this guy in this article from sexually assaulting boys.

Once more, the “equally yoked” teaching as applied to dating and marriage is detrimental and irrelevant: if you are a single Christian woman, you need to get past this mindset of “I can only date or marry another Christian” because many Christian men will abuse you, or they turn out to be perverts.

Continue reading “After Threatening Suicide, Pastor Ronnie Gorton (Married to a Woman and a Father) Indicted on 47 Charges of Sexually Assaulting Boys”

Disgusting, Creepy, Married Pervert Youth Pastor Exulted When Girl He was Bedding Turned 18 and ‘Legal’: Cops – Another Example of Why Equally Yoked Teaching is a Waste of Time

Disgusting, Creepy, Married Pervert Youth Pastor Exulted When Girl He was Bedding Turned 18 and ‘Legal’: Cops – Another Example of Why Equally Yoked Teaching is a Waste of Time

This guy was married and raping teen aged girls he met by way of his youth pastor job at a church.

First of all, contrary to what many conservative Christian leaders (such as Al Mohler) teach, marriage does not make anyone more godly, loving, ethical. You either have character and morals, or you do not.

Wearing a gold band on one’s finger, standing in front of a judge or preacher and reciting wedding vows, does not magically instill good character into a person.

Secondly, “equally yoked” is a heap of nonsense. So many perverts masquerade as Christians, or claim to be Christian, I honestly feel if you are a single Christian woman who desires marriage, you’re better off ditching the Equally Yoked rule.

I’d rather be married to, say, an Atheist Non-Raping man than a church-going, self professing Christian Rapist.

And to think my parents told me often when I was a kid that if I wanted to be married to seek a spouse at a church! BAH HA HA HA HAAA, I don’t think so.

In the several years I’ve been running this blog, I’ve seen (Link): far too many of these news stories of Christian men (some who even work as preachers!) who are arrested for rape or child molesting to be able to convince me that “equally yoked” is a wise, good, “biblical” or advantageous philosophy for single women.

(Link):  Youth pastor exulted when girl he was bedding turned 18 and ‘legal’: cops

Excerpts:

by J. Miller, March 2018

A youth pastor in Colorado had a sexual relationship with a high school senior — and gave the teen a card on her 18th birthday that read, “We’re legal,” according to an arrest affidavit.

Joshua Clemons, a former pastor at Cross Roads Community Church in Parker, was arrested Tuesday by Denver police on suspicion of sexual assault on a child by a person in a position of trust. He also faces two of the same counts in Douglas County, police in Parker (Link): told the Denver Post.

Continue reading “Disgusting, Creepy, Married Pervert Youth Pastor Exulted When Girl He was Bedding Turned 18 and ‘Legal’: Cops – Another Example of Why Equally Yoked Teaching is a Waste of Time”