This is Why You’re Single – The Top Dating App Dealbreakers Revealed, by M. Notkin

This is Why You’re Single – The Top Dating App Dealbreakers Revealed, by M. Notkin

(Link): This is why you’re single — the top dating app dealbreakers revealed

by Melanie Notkin
May 5, 2023

…A sizable number of single females have had their fill of tofu nibblers. A new study on dating app dealbreakers reports that 1 in 5 women will summarily reject a man who indicates he’s a vegan on his dating profile.

The study was conducted by Alexander, also known as @Datepsych on Twitter, a behavioral and cognitive neuroscience graduate student with a passion for information gathering. He keeps his last name private, he told The Post, due to his sometimes controversial research into topics like incel culture, promiscuity and facial attractiveness.

For this study, Alexander collected 130 different dealbreakers from his 18,500 Twitter followers, coding them into a survey for a social media “convenience sample” — meaning easily accessible dating app users on Twitter — of 438 men and women, with a mean age of 32.

He then asked participants to imagine a dating profile with a photo they found physically attractive enough to consider accepting. (Or, in app speak, swiping right.)

Next, the respondents scored each dealbreaker from one to five, with one being something they could overlook, and five being an absolute no-no that would lead to an immediate rejection, or a swipe-left, no matter how attractive the profile photo. Alexander then shared the absolute 5/5 guaranteed dealbreakers in his report.

The dealbreakers with the highest percent of fives were not shockers. For example, the overwhelming majority of women say they reject male profiles that exhibit violence, or sexual and bigoted content.

Men, on the other hand, were highly unlikely to want a date with a woman who uses her dating profile to promote her OnlyFans.

But that’s where the survey responses stopped being predictable. Turns out, when it comes to dating apps, the dealbreakers are not always the ones you’d expect.

Continue reading “This is Why You’re Single – The Top Dating App Dealbreakers Revealed, by M. Notkin”

Nearly Half of Single People Receive Unsolicited Nudes, Get Ghosted: Poll – and a Few Dating Tips

Nearly Half of Single People Receive Unsolicited Nudes, Get Ghosted: Poll – and a Few Dating Tips

The page I’ve linked to below has some “first date dating tips,” a few of which I’ve included in my post.

May I add another tip or two (this is especially for single women), and this is also applicable to friendships, family relationships, and any job you have (your co-workers or bosses):
Please spend time researching Narcissistic Abuse and Cluster B personality disorders (which includes but is not limited to Narcissism and Sociopathy).

Particularly if you are a woman, and you’re a shy, people pleasing or codependent woman, you may be prone to over-sharing when you meet someone new (whether a date, a co-worker, etc) because you mistakenly think that sharing personal details when you first meet someone will establish intimacy.

You need to throw that thinking, assumption, and behavior into the trash can immediately.

One reason you do NOT want to overshare early in a relationship (as one of the tips gets into below – and remember, this is applicable to friendship and co-workers too, not JUST dating) is that the person you are dating might be a Cluster B,
and a Cluster B person will exploit any personal information or weaknesses you admit to, or that they can pick up from observing you, to control or manipulate you as the relationship progresses.

Such persons (especially Vulnerable Narcissists) will get you to talk about yourself WAY too much on a first or second date (and of course psychopaths and sociopaths will use this strategy too, but it seems to be a little more of a classical move that Vulnerable Narcissists play).

They may start out acting very, very interested in you, asking you all sorts of questions about what makes you “tick,” about your background, what kind of family you come from, etc.

You need to be careful how much or what type of that information you share.

You can also choose to refuse to answer any questions out-right, just tell the person, “I choose not to answer that question.” If they keep pressing or nagging you into giving an answer, just keep repeating over and over (however many times necessary), “I decline to answer that question.”

You do not always owe other people answers (not all the time with all people in every situation – this is highly context specific, but on a first, second, third, fourth, etc., date, NO, you do NOT owe your date answers to any or all questions!), nor do you owe people justifications or explanations for whatever choices you make in life, either.

Vulnerable (also known as Covert) Narcissists (and other Cluster B persons) try to pry into your personal business and learn about weak areas and regrets as much as they can, not because they truly care about you or your background, or your likes, your triggers, or your vulnerabilities, but they want that information so that they can use it to exploit and control you with later on.

They will eventually intentionally bring up your triggers, your weak spots, and/or shame you with painful or embarrassing things you admitted to them on a first or second date.

For example, if you admit early on in a relationship to always having had body issues and insecurities, to feeling embarrassed about not being stick thin, then as time moves on, they will more than likely start mocking you about your weight, or making thinly veiled insults
– like if they walk in seeing you eating a slice of pie, they may make a low key snide dig like, “Oh, is that your second piece of pie today?,” or, “Do you really think with your weight issues you should be eating that?”

They are doing that kind of thing on purpose. It’s calculated to make you feel shame. It is deliberate.

They want to chip away at your self esteem so that you are easy to control, abuse, and manipulate.

Some of them, especially the Covert Narcissists, will sometimes feign innocence and act as though they really and truly DO care about your weight and your health when they make comments about you eating another piece of pie. But they don’t actually care about your health or your weight.

Their end goal is to shame you more so they can control you, and you unknowingly tipped them off early in the dating stages that they can use your sensitivity about your body image / weight to clobber you with down the road.

One good book on this topic to get you started, what to look for early on in dating (or in forming friendships, or what to look for on job interviews to make sure you’re not walking into a toxic work environment with an abusive boss or co-workers),
and to learn about some of the typical emotionally manipulative games Cluster B persons play on their targets, is this book:
“Psychopath Free” by Jackson MacKenzie.
The book “The Gift of Fear” by Gavin DeBecker also offers a few similar insights. 

(Link): Nearly half of single people receive unsolicited nudes, get ghosted: poll

by Jack Hobbs
March 28, 2023

Single people who’ve been ghosted or sent an unsolicited nude photo — you’re not alone.

A new poll revealed that nearly half of the single people asked have been victims of nasty dating etiquette.

The dating app Plenty of Fish created a survey along with a dating guide in partnership with life coach Michelle Elman to help single people avoid “undesirable dating behaviors and engineer more positive experiences.”

“Helping daters understand and navigate different behaviors on their dating journey is something I’m really passionate about, which is why I’ve partnered with Plenty of Fish to create the Desirable Dating Guide,” Elman told the Sun. “The guide highlights some of the negative behaviors and experiences that can occur in the dating world, while also shining a light on how singles can enact some positive change.”

According to the survey, which sampled nearly 4,000 British singles, 48% of respondents said that they received unsolicited nude photos from a match or date — with 45% of the 48% revealing that it made them feel disgusted.

Continue reading “Nearly Half of Single People Receive Unsolicited Nudes, Get Ghosted: Poll – and a Few Dating Tips”

Horrible Dating Experiences Leave 44% of Single Adults Doubting They’ll Ever Meet ‘The One’

Horrible Dating Experiences Leave 44% of Single Adults Doubting They’ll Ever Meet ‘The One’

(Link): Horrible dating experiences leave 44% of single adults doubting they’ll ever meet ‘the one’

March 31, 2023
by Study Finds

LONDON — More than half of single adults feel empowered to call out bad dating behavior, as they find it frustrating and exhausting. A poll of 4,000 British singletons, who are actively dating, reveals that 28 percent are tired of negative experiences when looking for love, while 33 percent get easily irritated.

Being ghosted without explanation (43%), getting stood up on a date (40%) and receiving unsolicited nude pictures (40%) are some of the main irks of those polled.

This has led to 44 percent doubting they will ever meet that someone special, while 35 percent say their confidence is negatively impacted.

…And 26 percent will be un-matching or unfollowing any potential love interests if they don’t fit the bill.

Continue reading “Horrible Dating Experiences Leave 44% of Single Adults Doubting They’ll Ever Meet ‘The One’”

Well Known Trans Buffoon Who Makes Mockery of Womanhood Wonders Why Nobody Wants to Date Him

Well Known Trans Buffoon Who Makes Mockery of Womanhood Wonders Why Nobody Wants to Date Him

Dylan  Mulvaney, a biological man who LARPs as a woman,  who has been consistently mocking womanhood for some time now, who was also granted spokeswoman role (though he’s, again, a man) for feminine products – such as Tampax Tampons, if I recall correctly – recently got FFS (female facial surgery) and was wondering online why nobody wants to date him.

I have to at least give Mulvaney a point or two for not screaming in anger, demanding that women (or men?)  date him, but some of this other behavior or comments have been obnoxious.

And no, referring to Mulvaney as “he” or “him” is not misgendering. He’s a natal male who wears dresses and got some cosmetic surgery.

He’s not a woman because he says so, because he says he feels like one, or because he’s not comfortable being in a man’s body.

(Link): Dylan Mulvaney Can’t Get a Date

March 8, 2023
by Lincoln Brown

Dylan Mulvaney wuz robbed. After undergoing multiple drastic and probably painful surgeries to make him look more like a woman, Mulvaney is discovering that no one is interested in going out with him. According to the Daily Caller, Mulvaney told People in March that he feels like someone who should not be single. Well, we’re all entitled to feel how we want. Reality frequently has other plans.

According to Mulvaney, “I’m getting a little impatient because, especially when you’re feeling yourself and even looking at that Grammys picture, I’m like, that’s somebody who should not be single. But then you’re like, wait, why is no one in the DMs?”…

Continue reading “Well Known Trans Buffoon Who Makes Mockery of Womanhood Wonders Why Nobody Wants to Date Him”

Beware Men (especially Hetero): Men Masquerading as Women are Lying to Have Sex with You – A Few Tips on How Men Can Spot the Imposters

Beware Men (especially Hetero): Men Masquerading as Women are Lying to Have Sex with You – A Few Tips on How Men Can Spot the Imposters

 ⚠️ The following blog post contains some very vulgar language and frank discussion of sex and sex acts.  ⚠️

I follow a few social media accounts whose owners lurk at Transgender forums, Reddit areas, and so on.

Most of these Transgender spaces discussed on those social media accounts are MtF (male to female – biological males – people who were born male – who want to transition to be women, mostly by wearing dresses; these would be “transwomen”).

From what I’ve seen, there is a percentage of these men (I’m not going to call them women) who want to have relationships and sex with hetero, natal men, and most of them claim in their forums that they do not divulge upfront to the men they approach in bars or over dating apps that they too are men (transwomen).

Many of these guys seem to be homosexuals – they are men who are attracted to other men. They should’ve just stayed as regular men, skipped the mascara and skirts, and tried to date other homosexual males.

Then there is a smaller percentage of these guys who seem to be hetero – they’re normally attracted to biological women, but their desperate, pathological need for validation, to be seen as a ‘real’ woman (something they will never, ever be) runs so disturbingly deep that they think the only way they can receive validation is if a straight, biological man will have sex with them, and/or date them and view them as being the same as what they call “cis” (biological) women.

Some of these trans deviants are admitting in their online spaces to one another to already having engaged in one night stands with a lot of straight men already.

Some of them get quite descriptive with all the kinky, weird sex acts they performed on the straight, biological men they fooled into having sex with them.

Continue reading “Beware Men (especially Hetero): Men Masquerading as Women are Lying to Have Sex with You – A Few Tips on How Men Can Spot the Imposters”

Police Warn That Elderly People Are Getting Scammed On Dating Sites – 2023 – Perennial Problem Gets Reported Like It’s New Every Other Year, Weird!

Police Warn That Elderly People Are Getting Scammed On Dating Sites – 2023 – Perennial Problem Gets Reported Like It’s New Every Other Year, Weird!

I’ve been running this blog for 13 years now. And I can say that this is a thing and has been a thing for a long time – that is to say, at least once a year, or every other year, I see headlines in the news heralding that senior citizens are being scammed on dating sites, and they’re being scammed more than ever.

This is not new information.

I don’t know why almost every year (to two years) police start announcing to the world that elderly people are getting ripped off on dating apps and sites. This is like telling the public every year that water is wet or the sky is blue.

Elderly people getting scammed on dating sites and apps goes together like peanut butter and jelly or salt and pepper. pbJelly

We’re now in 2023. Who are these elderly people being scammed these days, older Baby Boomers – I doubt it’s Silent Gen? At this time of writing, most of Gen X is not old enough to have dementia yet, so it’s definitely not Gen X, and most of Gen X is still considered middle-aged, not “elderly.”

I’m sorry if I sound victim blame-y here, but I don’t understand how in this day and age there are still some people who do not understand that you never, ever give or send money to anyone you meet online, especially not via a dating site.

I would maybe understand Silent Gen doing this, but most of them are octogenarians and are probably not dating, or even know what a dating app is.

I would assume that Baby Boomers would not be naive or foolish enough to fall for dating scams, so who are these elderly people these days being duped?

Public Service Announcement to anyone currently over age of 64:
You should already know this: if anyone asks you for money on any site, especially a dating site, even if they claim to be a Prince from Nigeria or a famous movie actor, do NOT send them any money! It’s a SCAM!

This type of news story is so common any more, that for however long I continue to run this blog, if I see any more of these “Elderly Folks Getting Scammed on Dating Sites” news headlines, I may not blog on them further.

Yes, elderly people get scammed on dating sites and apps, see also: the sun rises in the east, grass is green, and cats cough up fur balls. We know.

(Link): Police Warn That Elderly People Are Getting Scammed On Dating Sites

by J. Clinton
Feb 2, 2023

Oklahoma City Police reported that elderly people are more likely to be scammed than ever before.

Scams always start out with the scammer asking for money, (Link): Oklahoma News 4 reported.

“There’s so many scammers out there that will get online and many of them tell very believable stories and they will meet people on these dating sites in hopes that they’re lonely and they will do just about anything to keep a connection with someone, including send them cash and you really fall right into their hands,” Gary Knight, an employee of the Oklahoma City Police Department, explained.

One victim in particular, an elderly woman, reportedly paid $56,000 through cashier checks, cash, and gift cards to an anonymous scammer she never met, the outlet noted.

Many are reportedly approached by scammers on online services like Facebook Dating.

Continue reading “Police Warn That Elderly People Are Getting Scammed On Dating Sites – 2023 – Perennial Problem Gets Reported Like It’s New Every Other Year, Weird!”

For Valentine’s Day, 5 Facts About Single Americans – from Pew Research

For Valentine’s Day, 5 Facts About Single Americans – from Pew Research

(Link): For Valentine’s Day, 5 facts about single Americans


By Risa Gelles-Watnick

With Valentine’s Day around the corner, single Americans have a range of hopes when it comes to their romantic lives. Some dream of serious relationships, some are looking for casual dates and some are avoiding dating altogether.

valentines2023 Here are five findings about single Americans, based on a Pew Research Center survey of U.S. adults conducted July 5-17, 2022.

2. The majority of single adults are not interested in being struck (or even grazed) by Cupid’s arrow. Among Americans who are single, the largest share – 57% – say they are not currently looking for a relationship or casual dates.

(In a February 2022 Center survey, single adults who were not looking for a relationship or dates identified a variety of reasons as to why, but enjoying being single and having other priorities topped the list.)

Even among adults who are “single and looking,” not everyone is interested in the same type of relationship.

Continue reading “For Valentine’s Day, 5 Facts About Single Americans – from Pew Research”

Almost 20% of Singles Run a Background Check on Their Dates: Poll

Almost 20% of Singles Run a Background Check on Their Dates: Poll

(Link): Almost 20% of singles run a background check on their dates: poll

by B. Kato

Better safe than sorry.

Around one in five people run background checks on their online dates before meeting them, a new survey says — but who has time for all that rigmarole? Some 38% of respondents say they simply “stalk” their first dates online instead.

The survey of 1,000 singles, conducted in December by the Thriving Center of Psychology, comes as 127 million adults report being unattached.

Despite an astounding 91% insisting they find solace in their independence, one in three admit they are not content as a singleton. Half confessed to missing physical connection, while others feel like they are being left in the dust by friends who are married or taken.

For some, the online dating pool is desolate — and they’ve flocked to local haunts in an attempt to meet someone the ol’ fashioned way.

Continue reading “Almost 20% of Singles Run a Background Check on Their Dates: Poll”

Female TikTok Users Ditch Dating Apps, Go Husband-Hunting at Home Depot

Female TikTok Users Ditch Dating Apps, Go Husband-Hunting at Home Depot

Well this is bizarre.

I don’t know how men feel about being flirted with when they’re out on tasks like shopping, but most women hate this. Most women don’t want men staring at them or flirting with them if they’re shopping or at a gym.

Considering that churches have gender imbalances that favor single men, if you’re a single Christian woman, you may have more luck meeting a single guy at a Home Dept – God knows you won’t meet many eligible single men at any churches. The men who do attend churches are pedophiles or perverts or abusers.

(Link): Hilarious social media challenge has women ditching dating apps to find love at Home Depot

(Link):  Female TikTok users say they’re deleting their dating apps and heading to Home Depot

Jan. 23, 2023
by Ben Tobin

…Could Home Depot be the destination to meet your future husband? If some TikTokers are to be believed, the retailer’s over 2,000 locations have become an unlikely spot to look for dates.

Of the many women on TikTok who say they’re “deleting the dating apps in 2023,” some say they’re looking for love in a surprise location. “I’m headed to Home Depot to look confused in the lumber aisle.”

The humorous trend has been building for almost two years.

“Ladies, no joke, Home Depot is where you go if you want to meet a man,” TikTok user meganlouise217 said in a video in March 2021.

(Link): How doers get more done: Female TikTok users ditch dating apps, go husband-hunting at Home Depot

January 24, 2023

A recent fad has some young, single women on TikTok using their phones for more than just swiping right on dating apps like Bumble and Tinder. Instead, these girls are heading to home improvement stores like Home Depot to find a husband — and using the camera on their phone to chronicle their experiences.

Continue reading “Female TikTok Users Ditch Dating Apps, Go Husband-Hunting at Home Depot”

Oregon Torture Suspect Using Dating Apps to Lure New Victims, Police Warn (Update: Police Caught the Guy)

Oregon Torture Suspect Using Dating Apps to Lure New Victims, Police Warn (Update: Police Caught the Guy)

Updates Below

(Link): Man accused of torturing woman he held captive is using dating apps while on the run, police warn

(Link): Oregon torture suspect using dating apps to lure new victims, police warn

January 28, 2023
By Patrick Reilly

Oregon police have warned the public that an attempted murder suspect accused of holding a woman hostage is using dating apps to potentially lure new victims.

Benjamin Obadiah Foster, the subject of a multi-agency manhunt, could also be using the apps to recruit others who will help him evade capture, the Grants Pass police department said Friday.

The search for Foster, who was convicted in Nevada of keeping another woman in captivity, comes after he allegedly bound and severely beat a woman into unconsciousness near Grants Pass, Oregon on Tuesday, police said.

Continue reading “Oregon Torture Suspect Using Dating Apps to Lure New Victims, Police Warn (Update: Police Caught the Guy)”

Man Caught Up in Online Romance Scam is Robbed of $6,000 and His Cellphone

Man Caught Up in Online Romance Scam is Robbed of $6,000 and His Cellphone

(Link): Man caught up in online romance scam is robbed of $6,000 and his cellphone

Dec 27, 2022

A Los Angeles man fell victim to an online romance scam after Colombian woman he met online and traveled to meet robbed him of $6,000 and his cellphone.

Eduardo Villareal flew to the northern Caribbean coast city of Santa Marta before Christmas to meet the woman, who has not been identified, after chatting to her online for three months.

But his search for love unraveled when she and another female mugged him for his cash and cellphone at their first meeting.

Continue reading “Man Caught Up in Online Romance Scam is Robbed of $6,000 and His Cellphone”

I Liked A ‘High-Value’ Man’s Photo on a Dating App – He Rejected Me Because I’m ‘Fat’ by A. Diaz

I Liked A ‘High-Value’ Man’s Photo on a Dating App – He Rejected Me Because I’m ‘Fat’ by A. Diaz

I feel for this lady. This man who contacted her on this dating app sounds like a narcissistic, arrogant, entitled douche.

This woman doesn’t strike me as being like the entitled, obese, progressive “body positivity” or “fat acceptance” women who say bizarre things – like dieting is a part of white supremacy – and who demand that thin men date them.

The woman in the story below does appear to be on the large size (there were photos of her on the page), but she doesn’t have an entitled “attitude,” so, IMO, the guy who texted her back was being unnecessarily rude about the whole thing – he’s also a flaming A-hole and someone should kick him in the balls repeatedly for how he thinks about women, and how he treated this particular woman.

Amended this post to add the following observations:
The article says she met this guy on a “Christian” dating app (Plenty of Fish). I want to educate the married Christians out there, who keep hyping “Christian dating sites” to their lonely heart single friends: stop doing it because “Christian dating sites” are also filled with jerks, abusers, and rapists.

Years ago, I was on a few dating web sites, one of which was considered to be “Christian,” and the so-called self professing Christian men on those sites who approached me were gross, their profiles were peppered with inappropriate sexual talk
– I may blog here about sexual topics (and get quite frank about it), but when I’m on a dating site, I don’t want to see sex jokes or smutty humor on a guy’s profile, nor do I openly and frankly discuss sex-related stuff on any of my old dating site profiles, nor did I engage in “smutty” humor talk with any of the men who contacted me (I kept things clean).

There have been news stories in the last ten years of MARRIED Christian men (with HIV and AIDS) who lie and say they’re single and then meet single women on dating sites, some of which are “Christian” dating sites.

There was a serial rapist who said he was a Christian to women he met on dating sites, but once he’d get to know them and then meet them in person, he’d rape them (here’s one post on my blog about that).

So… secular and “Christian” dating sites and dating apps are not guarantees for meeting quality, up-standing, loving men. Meaning, you idiot Christian married couples out there need to stop dishing out the simplistic advice of “Just join Plenty of Fish or eHarmony to get a Christian spouse!” – we singles have tried that, and for a lot of us, those sites have NOT worked.

(Link): I liked a ‘high-value’ man’s photo on a dating app — he rejected me because I’m ‘fat’

Dec 8, 2022
By Adriana Diaz

A plus-size mom claims she was harassed last month by a man on a dating app with self-proclaimed “above average” looks and “high values.”

“It was so ridiculous that it was comical,” Krista Brown told Kennedy News.

Brown, 36, said she downloaded the Christian dating app Plenty of Fish in November after being single for three years. She was unprepared for the cringeworthy communications she said she received from a match who turned out to be a mismatch.

The Minnesota budget support specialist recalled thinking the cyberspace Casanova was “kind of cute” despite his “pathetic mustache.” She claims she swiped right, but didn’t message him. She says the unidentified man reached out to her — in a big way.

“He sent me a whole huge, long paragraph asking why I think I’m worthy of dating him, and what do I bring to the equation? He had a very condescending tone. He was so absolutely ridiculous,” she lamented.

Continue reading “I Liked A ‘High-Value’ Man’s Photo on a Dating App – He Rejected Me Because I’m ‘Fat’ by A. Diaz”