A Guide to Gynecological Exams: What Should — and Shouldn’t — Happen

A Guide to Gynecological Exams: What Should — and Shouldn’t — Happen

(Link): A Guide to Gynecological Exams: What Should — and Shouldn’t — Happen

Excerpt

By Pam Belluck and Jennifer Medina

The recent cases of Dr. Lawrence G. Nassar, the physician for the U.S. women’s gymnastics team, and Dr. George Tyndall, the gynecologist at the University of Southern California student health center, involve allegations that they inappropriately touched young female patients, often while doing a pelvic exam. Here’s what women should know about gynecological exams, including what to expect and what is out of bounds.

What happens during a routine gynecological visit?

Gynecological visits cover a wide range of topics, especially because many women do not regularly see any other physicians. “For most women, I am functioning as a primary care doctor,” said Dr. Iffath Hoskins, a clinical professor and director of safety and quality in obstetrics and gynecology at New York University. “A gynecology visit is much more than putting fingers in the vagina and doing a Pap smear. I want to make sure you’re O.K. overall before I make you take your clothes off.”

Continue reading “A Guide to Gynecological Exams: What Should — and Shouldn’t — Happen”

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Why Doesn’t Your Husband Want to Have Sex? by E. Bernstein

Why Doesn’t Your Husband Want to Have Sex? by E. Bernstein

(Link): Why Doesn’t Your Husband Want to Have Sex?

Excerpts:

May 12, 2018

Despite the conventional wisdom, sometimes it’s the man who loses sexual desire

Contrary to conventional wisdom, sometimes it’s men who first lose sexual desire in a long-term relationship, a new study finds.

Men’s desire for sex can be as tricky as women’s, according to researchers at the University of Kentucky.

Men often lose interest when they feel insecure, when they worry they are losing autonomy in a relationship, or when physical changes cause embarrassment. Pressure to be the initiator compounds the stress.

Continue reading “Why Doesn’t Your Husband Want to Have Sex? by E. Bernstein”

Millennial Explains Why She’s Still A Virgin at 27 Years Old: “It’s Partly Circumstance, It’s Partly Choice’

Millennial Explains Why She’s Still A Virgin at 27 Years Old: “It’s Partly Circumstance, It’s Partly Choice’

(Link):  Millennial Explains Why She’s Still A Virgin at 27 Years Old: “It’s Partly Circumstance, It’s Partly Choice’

Some of my comments about that article:

I don’t agree with all the views of the woman named Kenney who is quoted in this. Kenney wrongly assumes that being a virgin, or choosing to be one due to religious reasons or what have you, makes you repressed, or she assumes you have been brain-washed by the patriarchy.

The article makes a point that people who read about her story on social media were “divided” about it.

If people are touchy about virginity and celibacy it’s because most of the culture is extremely sexualized, puts far too much weight on sex, assumes that having sex is necessary to be “normal” or to be mature. Further, any and all forms of sexual acts have been normalized by broader culture now to the point that anyone who chooses not to partake in the hedonistic sexual free-for-all is thought to be a weirdo, loser, or wet blanket.

I’m expect to support and respect the behavior of people who have kinky sex, homosexual sex, promiscuous sex, etc and what all, but all the people who demand me expect that refuse to respect adult virginity or adult celibacy.

Millennial Explains Why She’s Still A Virgin at 27 Years Old: “It’s Partly Circumstance, It’s Partly Choice’

Excerpts:

“I think it’s partly circumstance and partly choice,” she told hosts Holly Willoughby and Phillip Schofield.

“I think when it comes to losing your virginity there are two camps of thought, when one wants it to mean something and wait for the right person, and obviously some people don’t care.

“I guess I was in the first category, I wasn’t looking for the man I was going to marry, but I wanted something that wasn’t going to be a one night stand, a connection more than sex. I guess I just never found the right person.”

Continue reading “Millennial Explains Why She’s Still A Virgin at 27 Years Old: “It’s Partly Circumstance, It’s Partly Choice’”

Thoughts on the NRO Essay “Advice For Incels” by Kevin D. Williamson

Thoughts on the NRO Essay “Advice For Incels” by Kevin D. Williamson

About me and this blog:

If you are new to my blog: I have been a conservative my entire life. I’ve never voted Democrat. I was a Republican until a few years ago. I am no longer in any political party.

I sometimes critique secular, left wing feminists on my blog (such as but not limited to (Link): this post and (Link): this one), but there are times when I believe other conservatives get feminists wrong, and feminists are actually correct on some issues.

I was brought up in a traditional values, conservative, Christian family where my parents brought me to Southern Baptist churches as I was growing up, where I was taught to believe in gender complementarianism, which I did for many years, until I finally realized how (Link): wrong and sexist complementarianism is.

Because I grew up as a complementarian, I am quite familiar with what they think and why they think as they do.

My current religious beliefs are somewhat “up in the air,” as I am waffling between being agnostic, (or a deist), and the Christian faith. (Note: I am not an atheist.)

I am by no means anti- Nuclear Family, anti- motherhood, or anti- marriage, though I do posit that many to most conservatives – especially the religious ones – have gone to un-biblical lengths and have turned the Nuclear Family, marriage, natalism, and motherhood and fatherhood into idols which is wrong of them.

— end introduction to me and this blog —

I saw a link to this essay go through my Twitter feed today:

(Link): Advice for Incels by Kevin D. Williamson

On one level, this essay – “Advice for Incels” was okay.

However, I think that while the guy who wrote it has his heart in the right place, I think he gets a lot of things wrong and is naive about how Baptist and conservative Protestant and evangelical churches are for adult singles.

I’ve spent the last several years on this blog covering these topics – I’d encourage Williamson and anyone who read his NRO piece to read the books  (Link): “Singled Out” by Field and Colon and  “Quitting Church” by Christian author Julia Duin for even more information.

Continue reading “Thoughts on the NRO Essay “Advice For Incels” by Kevin D. Williamson”

Sexual Consent Apps

Various articles about consent apps for sex.

(Link): Sexual Consent Apps Aim to Start Conversations, Prevent Assaults

(Link): The Problem with Sexual Consent Apps

Not only are they far from sexy, which can hamper use, they miss the mark on discussing what consent actually is.

(Link): Saying OK to Sex? There’s an App for That – WSJ

(Link):  People are talking about sexual consent. Would an app help?

Excerpts:

Smartphone apps We-Consent and Sa-Sie were among the first to attempt a digital solution with apps that allowed partners to check “yes” when they agreed to sex.

Now, LegalFling is joining the consent-by-click market, with the added cachet of being blockchain-based. The company says it will be available for download in the Apple and Android app stores in the next month.

Sure, it can be awkward to stop and talk about consent in the heat of the moment, which is why partners rely on non-verbal cues to give and interpret it.

Continue reading “Sexual Consent Apps”

The Sexless Life When Sex Is God by D. French

The Sexless Life When Sex Is God by D. French

(The link to the editorial by D. French is farther below)

Overall, it’s a good essay, though I can’t say as though I totally agree with this author’s suggestion, which involves teaching people to put faith in God, or a god, because, he believes, one issue with incel men is that they have turned sex into a deity.

And that may well be true – perhaps incels have turned sex into a deity, but I’m not sure asking them to turn to God will necessarily fix this issue.

Why? Because more and more Americans are post-Christian, or, if they still believe in God, they now regard themselves as “nones” or “dones” and have been leaving churches in droves.  There is little to no respect by such people for what churches or pastors are saying or preaching.

Not only that, but a lot of Christians, as I have blogged about repeatedly on this site, have also turned sex into a deity themselves.

I have many examples on my blogs of pastors who mock and disparage singleness, celibacy, and adult virginity, who go on and on in their sermons about how great marriage is and how great sex is.

One of a few solutions I put forth is this: since our (secular) culture esteems choice so highly, remind the third-wave feminists and the sexist bro-dudes who worship sex, that if they expect everyone to respect their choice to have, or to want, pre-marital sex, that they need to return that favor and respect those, who by choice or circumstance, are virgins into adulthood, or who practice celibacy.

Some feminists yell, scream, and complain about “slut shaming,” but some of them (and the wider culture) likes to practice Celibate Shaming and Virgin Shaming, which I’ve blogged about many times before (with some examples).

Continue reading “The Sexless Life When Sex Is God by D. French”

Actually We Don’t Owe You Sex, and We Never Will by M. Donegan

Actually We Don’t Owe You Sex, and We Never Will by M. Donegan

(Link to the Donegan editorial is farther below)

As I’ve mentioned on older posts on this blog, not only do women not owe men sex, we don’t owe them smiles, dates, attention, emotional support, or companionship, but some of them are under the very misguided notion that we do.

According to this article, some of these bitter sexist ass hat male incels feel that women have a moral obligation to have sex with them – no, we do not. One of the incels quoted argued that people (or is it just men?) have a “right” to sex – no, wrong again.

If you are a sexless man, I am under no obligation to have sex with you. I do not owe you sex.

Continue reading “Actually We Don’t Owe You Sex, and We Never Will by M. Donegan”

Who Are “Incels” (Involuntary Celibates)? Behind the Misogynistic Ideology That Inspired The Toronto Suspect by T. Merrigan

Who Are “Incels”? Behind the Misogynistic Ideology That Inspired The Toronto Suspect

Much farther below, in this post: link to an article hosted on The Lily, about Alex Minassian, who was apparently influenced by online “incel” (women-hating) groups.

I’ve actually already done a post or two about these misogynists before, such as (Link): this one – they refer to themselves as “Involuntary Celibates” and blame women for their problems and lives, rather than taking responsibility for themselves. (They also like to live in a fantasy world where women have lives so much easier than men, and, women are supposedly to blame for the problems of men.)

These bitter men exude hatred of women but then have the audacity to bleat on Reddit threads and elsewhere that “women don’t like nice guys,” and they cannot comprehend how it is no woman wants to date or have sex with a “nice guy” (who is actually a big, sexist, woman-hating jerk) such as themselves.

It’s no mystery – well, not to the rest of us.

One problem of posting about these sexist douche canoes is that they will at times want to leave a comment under any posts you make about them.

According to some of these articles I’ve read about Incels, they celebrate every time an Incel kills women. If Incels kill all the women, there won’t be any women for them to have a chance of having sex with – they’d have to have sex with other men.

Other than being immoral, killing women is counter-productive to their goals of having sex with a real living woman. But I guess not only do they lack in looks, incels also aren’t very intelligent.

Continue reading “Who Are “Incels” (Involuntary Celibates)? Behind the Misogynistic Ideology That Inspired The Toronto Suspect by T. Merrigan”

It’s Not Sex That Makes You Healther and Happier – It’s What You Do Before and After by L. Fessler

It’s Not Sex That Makes You Healther and Happier – It’s What You Do Before and After

(Link): It’s Not Sex That Makes You Healther and Happier – It’s What You Do Before and After

Excerpts:

People who have sex more frequently report a greater sense of general happiness, according to numerous studies. One even found that having sex once a week, as opposed to monthly, boosts spirits more than earning an extra $50,000 per year.

Yet the sex-happiness association means nothing if we don’t know why it exists. (Link): New research published in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin sheds some light on the matter: Sex itself isn’t what makes us happier, it’s about the snuggles we share before, during, and after.

“We demonstrated that an important reason why sex is associated with well-being is that it promotes the experience of affection with the partner,” says University of Toronto postdoctoral fellow Anik Debrot, the study’s co-author. “Thus, the quality of the bond with the partner is essential to understand the benefits of sex.”

… Both [studies] confirmed that more sexual activity correlates with increased positivity and life satisfaction. However, the association between sex and general happiness was dependent on affectionate touching, meaning that when the researchers accounted for for affectionate touching in their predictive model, the association between sex frequency and life satisfaction was insignificant. These results held steady regardless of participants’ age, relationship duration, and relationship status.

Woman, 26, Cut Off Her 40-year-old Boyfriend’s Penis With Garden Shears ‘Because He Shared Their Sex Tape With His Friends’

Woman, 26, Cut Off Her 40-year-old Boyfriend’s Penis With Garden Shears ‘Because He Shared Their Sex Tape With His Friends’

(Link): Woman, 26, Cut Off Her 40-year-old Boyfriend’s Penis With Garden Shears ‘Because He Shared Their Sex Tape With His Friends’

Brenda Barattini, 26, allegedly attacked her 40-year-old lover Sergio Fernandez

She is accused of chopping off 90 per cent of his penis with some garden shears

A woman accused of cutting off her boyfriend’s penis with a pair of garden shears said she did it because he shared their sex tape with his friends.

Continue reading “Woman, 26, Cut Off Her 40-year-old Boyfriend’s Penis With Garden Shears ‘Because He Shared Their Sex Tape With His Friends’”

Teaching Consent: Could Oklahoma Lead a New Wave in Sex Education?

(Link):  Teaching Consent: Could Oklahoma Lead a New Wave in Sex Education?

How one teenager turned the worst night of her life into ‘Lauren’s Law’ – a state bill that could change the way high schoolers are taught about sex

April 2018
by Glyn Peterson

Lauren Atkins has had to repeat the story of the worst night of her life so many times that she can now tell it in three sentences.

So, when an Oklahoma legislator asked Lauren to share it at a recent committee hearing, she was nervous but prepared.

Sentence number one: she went to a party last spring. Number two: she was incapacitated and a boy at the party told her friends he would take care of her. Three: after she finished throwing up, she recounts, he helped her onto a bed and raped her. “The word rape is hard for some people to hear,” Atkins says, “but I feel like me saying it is what actually catches their ear.”

If passed, Oklahoma House Bill 2734, nicknamed “Lauren’s Law” after Atkins, would provide high school teachers with the training and resources required to have nuanced, evidence-based conversations with their students about consent.

Continue reading “Teaching Consent: Could Oklahoma Lead a New Wave in Sex Education?”

CDC Turns to GOOGLE, Socials to Predict Syphilis Outbreaks…

CDC Turns to GOOGLE, Socials to Predict Syphilis Outbreaks…

(Link): Artificial intelligence used to predict STDs

 By Laura Kelly – The Washington Times – Monday, April 9, 2018
Syphilis has made a comeback in the U.S., and health researchers are using Google searches and tweets in an effort to predict the next outbreak.

After decades of steady decline, infection rates for the sexually transmitted disease started to rise after hitting a historic low in 2000 — from 2.2 cases per 100,000 people to 8.7 cases per 100,000 in 2015 and 2016, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

Continue reading “CDC Turns to GOOGLE, Socials to Predict Syphilis Outbreaks…”

Grieving for My Sex Life After My Husband Died by A. Radosh

Grieving for My Sex Life After My Husband Died by A. Radosh

One minor theme I sometimes bring up on this blog is that getting married is not a recipe for ever-lasting happiness: your spouse, should you marry, can develop early on-set dementia, or die from cancer, a car accident, etc. Or, maybe your spouse turns out to be abusive or so self-centered that he doesn’t care to meet your emotional needs.

So, here we have an article by a lady whose husband died, so she’s not having sex.

I’ve mentioned before in a few other posts on this blog that married people should not think they’re off the hook just because they have a spouse and a spouse is providing companionship – because if your spouse dies before you, you will be single again and find yourself lonely.

In this case, if you know and believe sex outside of marriage is morally wrong you’re not going to start having sex with other people after your spouse dies. This should be another reason why Christians teach that sexual purity, chastity, and celibacy are for all people, not just teens or single adults.

(Link): Grieving for My Sex Life After My Husband Died by A. Radosh

Excerpts:

…Bart and I never bought into that stereotype. We were septuagenarians now, and the sex was still fun. It bound us together.

When Bart was diagnosed with multiple myeloma in his mid-70s, we were both stunned. He had always been strong, athletic, energetic, and healthy; but now the cells in the marrow of his bones were being destroyed by cancer. Within a few months, our hikes up the Catskill high peaks were replaced with quiet walks along the stream near our house.

Continue reading “Grieving for My Sex Life After My Husband Died by A. Radosh”

After Threatening Suicide, Pastor Ronnie Gorton (Married to a Woman and a Father) Indicted on 47 Charges of Sexually Assaulting Boys

After Threatening Suicide, Pastor Ronnie Gorton (Married to a Woman and a Father) Indicted on 47 Charges of Sexually Assaulting Boys – Ditch the Equally Yoked Teaching, Christian Single Women!

I believe the article, which is linked to much farther below in this post, says that this child- raping pastor is married to a woman, and he and the woman have two or three of their own children.

Once more, contrary to what many to most conservative Christians and conservative think tanks teach, marriage does not make people more godly, loving, or mature. Being married to a woman did not stop this guy in this article from sexually assaulting boys.

Once more, the “equally yoked” teaching as applied to dating and marriage is detrimental and irrelevant: if you are a single Christian woman, you need to get past this mindset of “I can only date or marry another Christian” because many Christian men will abuse you, or they turn out to be perverts.

Continue reading “After Threatening Suicide, Pastor Ronnie Gorton (Married to a Woman and a Father) Indicted on 47 Charges of Sexually Assaulting Boys”

‘My sex addiction almost killed me’: Woman confesses compulsive pursuit of anonymous hook-ups nearly drove her to suicide

(Link): ‘My sex addiction almost killed me’: Woman confesses compulsive pursuit of anonymous hook-ups nearly drove her to suicide

Jace Downey, 30, before she sought help the sex she was having was becoming increasingly dangerous, risky and painful

A woman who claims to be addicted to sex says her compulsive pursuit of anonymous hook-ups almost made her take of her own life.

Continue reading “‘My sex addiction almost killed me’: Woman confesses compulsive pursuit of anonymous hook-ups nearly drove her to suicide”

Saving Our Sexuality: Is #MeToo Enough? by A. Arndt

Saving Our Sexuality: Is #MeToo Enough? by A. Arndt

(Link): Saving Our Sexuality: Is #MeToo Enough? by A. Arndt

Excerpts:

…Is #MeToo Enough?

“Carelessness” and “brutality” are two words that certainly typify the sexual “moment” we are in as a culture. How we expect to live in a 50 Shades sexual fantasy world while also managing to avoid it’s unintentional (but by no means unforeseen) ugly consequences totally escapes me.

…I rejoice that with the #MeToo movement we are seeing at least the beginnings of a reckoning—of society’s attempt to say, with a unified voice, “This we will not tolerate.”

But is #MeToo enough? It seems obvious to me that it is not.

As long as the roots of the problem are left unaddressed, the same ugly fruit will continue to spring up from polluted earth—now in one way, now in another. We will keep recycling brutality and abuse.

Continue reading “Saving Our Sexuality: Is #MeToo Enough? by A. Arndt”

How A Rare Poison Could Help Bring The First Male Birth Control Pill to Market

(Link): How A Rare Poison Could Help Bring The First Male Birth Control Pill to Market

After decades of research, development of a male birth control may now be one step closer. My colleagues and I are working on a promising lead for a male birth control pill based on ouabain—a plant extract that African warriors and hunters traditionally used as a heart-stopping poison on their arrows.

…Today, men have just two choices when it comes to birth control: condoms or a vasectomy.

Continue reading “How A Rare Poison Could Help Bring The First Male Birth Control Pill to Market”

Male Sex Robots With Unstoppable Bionic Penises Are Coming This Year

Male Sex Robots With Unstoppable Bionic Penises Are Coming This Year by R. Waugh

(Link): Male Sex Robots With Unstoppable Bionic Penises Are Coming This Year

Excerpts:

January 8, 2018

…But don’t despair, ladies – RealDoll (maker of those alarming plastic sexbots for men) is making one for women too.

….Matt McMullen of RealDoll said that the company’s currently tweaking the sexbot’s voice and personality – and says that users will be able to choose any penis size that suits them.

‘We’re working on a male version of the robot AI,’ McMullen told the Daily Star. ‘We’ll eventually have a male and a female platform available.’

David Levy, author of Love and Sex With Robots, says, ‘I’m sure women will find robots equally appealing as men.

Fewer High School Students Are Having Sex (Time magazine – 2018)

(Link): Fewer High School Students Are Having Sex (Time magazine – 2018)

Across the U.S., the number of high school students who report having sex has dropped, according to new federal data.

The report, based on a nationwide self-reported survey of high school students and published by researchers at the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), found that the proportion of students who said they had ever had sexual intercourse dropped from 47% in 2005 to 41% in 2015, the latest data available.

Continue reading “Fewer High School Students Are Having Sex (Time magazine – 2018)”

How Important Is Sex In A Marriage? Relationship Experts Weigh In by Cat Bowen

(Link): How Important Is Sex In A Marriage? Relationship Experts Weigh In

Excerpts:

Dr. David Ley, author of Insatiable Wives: Women Who Stray and the Men Who Love Them, tells Romper, “I take the tact that it’s incredibly important for people in a marriage to have shared sexual values, levels of desire, or the ability to negotiate this within the relationship. Things are fine when both partners have similar sexual interests and the frequency of sex meets both their desire, but, when that changes, or there’s a discrepancy, most couples don’t know how to negotiate or manage it.”

If you and your spouse have different views of sex and how it relates to marriage, it matters. This can definitely bleed into other areas of your life if you feel unfulfilled or even unwanted by your partner. It’s gutting to your self esteem and difficult to recover from.

Continue reading “How Important Is Sex In A Marriage? Relationship Experts Weigh In by Cat Bowen”