Supreme Court Nominee Kavanaugh and Virginity

Supreme Court Nominee Kavanaugh and Virginity

So, Brett Kavanaugh is Trump’s nominee for Supreme Court Justice.

Apparently Democrats leaked the personal information of Dr. Christine Ford, who claims that when younger, Kavanaugh pushed her on to a bed, put his hand over her mouth, and was attempting to undress her.

It was either Ford or another woman who knew Kavanaugh when he was a teen or young 20-something who claims Kavanaugh exposed his genitals to her.

Kavanaugh was called before a Senate committee last week (great parody (Link): here)

Anyway – I was raised in the Christian faith, and partly due to that and Christian sexual ethics teachings – which stress that sex outside of marriage is sin – I’ve yet to have sex, I am still a virgin, as I’ve never married. I’m in my 40s.

One thing I’ve noticed is that not only does a large swath of secular culture mock sexually abstinent people, but so too does Christian culture and conservatives.

Your average liberal or feminist wants culture to respect any and all sexual actions and choices, yet, they will mock adults who are celibate or are virgins (I have examples of this on previous post on this blog).

Christians and conservatives frequently mock or warn about sexual promiscuity, they like to shame women who have children outside of wedlock., and yet, Christians and conservatives also are un-supportive or adults past the age of 29 who are sexually abstaining.

Yes, Christians and some conservatives will SAY that they respect adult virginity, but in truth, they do not. Some of them openly mock or ridicule anyone who is chaste and/or single past the age of 25, while some of their other attitudes of sex – such as a very “easy forgivism” attitude in regards to fornication or an assumption that every unmarried adult page age 18 is sexually active – belie and contradict their so-called respect for chastity.

So, one topic of several I’ve blogged about here regularly for the last few years have been virginity and celibacy.

I’d say many people in American culture would define or understand virginity, in the context of hetero relationships, to say that one “loses one’s virginity” if one engages in penis- in- the- vagina (or anus) physical contact.

(That’s pretty much my understanding of the word and concept, as well.)

Brett Kavanaugh was defending himself by saying that he was a virgin through high school and during part (or all?) or his college years.

Being a virgin does not prohibit or preclude a man from doing the things Kavanaugh was accused of, such as allegedly exposing his penis to one young lady, and pushing another woman down on a bed and attempting to remove her clothing without her consent.

A virgin can, in fact, expose him or herself and still technically remain a virgin.

A virgin can pin a woman down to a bed, cover her mouth, and paw at her clothing and still remain a virgin, if one understands “virgin” to mean “no penis in a vagina and/or anus” definition.

I notice that nobody in our culture values or respects virginity unless it can “come in handy” like in this very specific case where Kavanaugh is trying to depict himself as an innocent choir boy who was incapable of groping women or exposing himself, all because he never went “all the way.”

Some of the attitudes that secular society has against virginity, which the author, Creech, outlines below in his piece I have copied, are also the same in much of the Christian community, and among secular conservatives.

As I have noted elsewhere on my blog, in blog posts now a few years old, there are well-known Christians, some are pastors, some are book authors and bloggers, who also doubt that anyone can remain a virgin past the age of 18 or 29.

Many Christians and conservatives believe, to use one phrase I’ve seen them use in discussing this subject, that it takes a “Herculean effort” to remain a virgin past one’s twenties.

Yet other Christians assume, quite wrongly, that if someone is a virgin past the age of 18 (or 29), it must be because that person lacks a libido, and/or that God “gifted them with celibacy,” and that God also supernaturally empowers that person to resist having sexual relations – all of which is false.

God does not “gift” anyone with celibacy, or with a supernatural ability to resist sex. The reasons why a person is able to maintain celibacy comes down to self-control, choice, and personal conviction, and it’s something that everyone can accomplish, but most do not want to, because they are too selfish or lazy.

It’s easier for the Christian fornicators out there to assume that anyone who didn’t fornicate like they did must be especially exceptional in some regard, as in, God waved a magic wand and gave that person some super ability to resist sexual temptation, or God removed all sexual desire from the person.

(Link):  Kavanaugh’s ‘Virgin Defense’

By Christian Post Columnist, Rev. Mark H. Creech

 1 Oct 2018

In reference to the allegations of sexual assault against him, Judge Brett Kavanaugh said in an interview with Fox News’ Martha McCallum, “I did not have sexual intercourse or anything close to sexual intercourse in high school or many years thereafter.”

“So you are saying that through all these years in question that you were a virgin?” asked McCallum. “That’s correct,” said Kavanaugh.

Kavanaugh also referenced the same during his latest testimony before the Senate Judiciary Committee on Thursday, saying his abstinence from sex during those years was a matter of “faith, respect, and caution.”

Some now are calling this “The Virgin Defense” and find Kavanaugh’s claim highly suspect and worthy of ridicule.

Continue reading “Supreme Court Nominee Kavanaugh and Virginity”

Millennial Explains Why She’s Still A Virgin at 27 Years Old: “It’s Partly Circumstance, It’s Partly Choice’

Millennial Explains Why She’s Still A Virgin at 27 Years Old: “It’s Partly Circumstance, It’s Partly Choice’

(Link):  Millennial Explains Why She’s Still A Virgin at 27 Years Old: “It’s Partly Circumstance, It’s Partly Choice’

Some of my comments about that article:

I don’t agree with all the views of the woman named Kenney who is quoted in this. Kenney wrongly assumes that being a virgin, or choosing to be one due to religious reasons or what have you, makes you repressed, or she assumes you have been brain-washed by the patriarchy.

The article makes a point that people who read about her story on social media were “divided” about it.

If people are touchy about virginity and celibacy it’s because most of the culture is extremely sexualized, puts far too much weight on sex, assumes that having sex is necessary to be “normal” or to be mature. Further, any and all forms of sexual acts have been normalized by broader culture now to the point that anyone who chooses not to partake in the hedonistic sexual free-for-all is thought to be a weirdo, loser, or wet blanket.

I’m expect to support and respect the behavior of people who have kinky sex, homosexual sex, promiscuous sex, etc and what all, but all the people who demand me expect that refuse to respect adult virginity or adult celibacy.

Millennial Explains Why She’s Still A Virgin at 27 Years Old: “It’s Partly Circumstance, It’s Partly Choice’

Excerpts:

“I think it’s partly circumstance and partly choice,” she told hosts Holly Willoughby and Phillip Schofield.

“I think when it comes to losing your virginity there are two camps of thought, when one wants it to mean something and wait for the right person, and obviously some people don’t care.

“I guess I was in the first category, I wasn’t looking for the man I was going to marry, but I wanted something that wasn’t going to be a one night stand, a connection more than sex. I guess I just never found the right person.”

Continue reading “Millennial Explains Why She’s Still A Virgin at 27 Years Old: “It’s Partly Circumstance, It’s Partly Choice’”

Thoughts on the NRO Essay “Advice For Incels” by Kevin D. Williamson

Thoughts on the NRO Essay “Advice For Incels” by Kevin D. Williamson

About me and this blog:

If you are new to my blog: I have been a conservative my entire life. I’ve never voted Democrat. I was a Republican until a few years ago. I am no longer in any political party.

I sometimes critique secular, left wing feminists on my blog (such as but not limited to (Link): this post and (Link): this one), but there are times when I believe other conservatives get feminists wrong, and feminists are actually correct on some issues.

I was brought up in a traditional values, conservative, Christian family where my parents brought me to Southern Baptist churches as I was growing up, where I was taught to believe in gender complementarianism, which I did for many years, until I finally realized how (Link): wrong and sexist complementarianism is.

Because I grew up as a complementarian, I am quite familiar with what they think and why they think as they do.

My current religious beliefs are somewhat “up in the air,” as I am waffling between being agnostic, (or a deist), and the Christian faith. (Note: I am not an atheist.)

I am by no means anti- Nuclear Family, anti- motherhood, or anti- marriage, though I do posit that many to most conservatives – especially the religious ones – have gone to un-biblical lengths and have turned the Nuclear Family, marriage, natalism, and motherhood and fatherhood into idols which is wrong of them.

— end introduction to me and this blog —

I saw a link to this essay go through my Twitter feed today:

(Link): Advice for Incels by Kevin D. Williamson

On one level, this essay – “Advice for Incels” was okay.

However, I think that while the guy who wrote it has his heart in the right place, I think he gets a lot of things wrong and is naive about how Baptist and conservative Protestant and evangelical churches are for adult singles.

I’ve spent the last several years on this blog covering these topics – I’d encourage Williamson and anyone who read his NRO piece to read the books  (Link): “Singled Out” by Field and Colon and  “Quitting Church” by Christian author Julia Duin for even more information.

Continue reading “Thoughts on the NRO Essay “Advice For Incels” by Kevin D. Williamson”

CDC Turns to GOOGLE, Socials to Predict Syphilis Outbreaks…

CDC Turns to GOOGLE, Socials to Predict Syphilis Outbreaks…

(Link): Artificial intelligence used to predict STDs

 By Laura Kelly – The Washington Times – Monday, April 9, 2018
Syphilis has made a comeback in the U.S., and health researchers are using Google searches and tweets in an effort to predict the next outbreak.

After decades of steady decline, infection rates for the sexually transmitted disease started to rise after hitting a historic low in 2000 — from 2.2 cases per 100,000 people to 8.7 cases per 100,000 in 2015 and 2016, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

Continue reading “CDC Turns to GOOGLE, Socials to Predict Syphilis Outbreaks…”

Saving Our Sexuality: Is #MeToo Enough? by A. Arndt

Saving Our Sexuality: Is #MeToo Enough? by A. Arndt

(Link): Saving Our Sexuality: Is #MeToo Enough? by A. Arndt

Excerpts:

…Is #MeToo Enough?

“Carelessness” and “brutality” are two words that certainly typify the sexual “moment” we are in as a culture. How we expect to live in a 50 Shades sexual fantasy world while also managing to avoid it’s unintentional (but by no means unforeseen) ugly consequences totally escapes me.

…I rejoice that with the #MeToo movement we are seeing at least the beginnings of a reckoning—of society’s attempt to say, with a unified voice, “This we will not tolerate.”

But is #MeToo enough? It seems obvious to me that it is not.

As long as the roots of the problem are left unaddressed, the same ugly fruit will continue to spring up from polluted earth—now in one way, now in another. We will keep recycling brutality and abuse.

Continue reading “Saving Our Sexuality: Is #MeToo Enough? by A. Arndt”

HIV Positive Homosexual Guy Allegedly Cut Tips Off Condoms to Infect His Grindr Dates

HIV Positive Homosexual Guy Allegedly Cut Tips Off Condoms to Infect His Grindr Dates

I most usually focus on hetero-sexuals or heterosexual related issues, but there’s this story (another example of why being celibate isn’t so bad, you don’t have to worry about someone deliberately trying to give you a STI):

(Link):  HIV-positive hairdresser allegedly cut tips off condoms to infect his Grindr dates

Oct 2017

A hairdresser deliberately infected at least four men with HIV after meeting them on gay dating app Grindr — before sending them mocking messages, a court heard.

Daryll Rowe, 26, from Edinburgh, Scotland, is accused of embarking on a “cynical campaign” to infect as many men as he could with the virus.

He texted one of his alleged victims: “Maybe you have the fever cos I came inside you and I have HIV, lol. Whoops!”

The court heard Rowe also called one of his victims and laughed over the phone as he goaded the man about his potential diagnosis.

The victim later tested positive for HIV, with a strain of the virus similar to Rowe’s.

Continue reading “HIV Positive Homosexual Guy Allegedly Cut Tips Off Condoms to Infect His Grindr Dates”

Christian Virginity Peddlers Vs Muslims Who Molest Girls and The Liberals Who Look the Other Way 

Christian Virginity Peddlers Vs Muslims Who Molest Girls & The Liberals Who Look the Other Way 

I intended on making this blog post the other day but forgot. As I noted in one of my (Link): last posts, I have not visited SCCL (Stuff Christian Culture Likes) Facebook group since early June 2017 for reasons that are explained in that post.

A couple of weeks ago, someone in my Twitter shared a link to (Link): this page titled“Jodi Heckert Pledged to Protect His Daughter’s Virginity, Now in Prison For Child Molestation”

If you scroll to the bottom of that page, there is a line that reads:

“H/T Stuff Christian Culture Likes.”

[Hat Tip to Stuff Christian Culture Likes]

So, I take it that Stephanie Drury, maintainer of SCCL Facebook group, posted a link to that news story on her group for her members to mock and cluck in worry over. This same, group, though, which is largely comprised of liberals, does not like for Islam to be called out for infractions against girls, women, or for anyone, really.

When I mentioned in one of (Link): my other posts critical of SCCL that about any time I see a terrorist mentioned on the news, the terrorist almost always turns out to be a Muslim (yes, it’s true, (Link): most of them are), several of Drury’s SCCL readers had temper tantrums.

Before I continue, allow me to quote from liberal, atheist, and Democrat Camille Paglia here:

But today’s liberalism has become grotesquely mechanistic and authoritarian: It’s all about reducing individuals to a group identity, defining that group in permanent victim terms, and denying others their democratic right to challenge that group and its ideology.

… The reluctance or inability of Western liberals to candidly confront jihadism has been catastrophically counterproductive insofar as it has inspired an ongoing upsurge in right-wing politics in Europe and the United States.

Citizens have an absolute right to demand basic security from their government. The contortions to which so many liberals resort to avoid connecting bombings, massacres, persecutions, and cultural vandalism to Islamic jihadism is remarkable, given their usual animosity to religion, above all Christianity.

…Right now, too many secular Western liberals treat Islam with paternalistic condescension…

Source:

(Link): Camille Paglia: On Trump, Democrats, Transgenderism, and Islamist Terror

Paglia is one of the few left wingers I’ve seen who comprehends.

Islam is notorious for sexism. Many of their Imams teach it is acceptable for husbands to beat wives. Honor killings, where Muslim families will stone girls or women to death for being rape victims, are not uncommon.

In some Islamic nations or cultures, women are not allowed to ride bicycles, wear skirts, or obtain educations. (Examples with links to news stories of all those mentioned (Link): here)

Continue reading “Christian Virginity Peddlers Vs Muslims Who Molest Girls and The Liberals Who Look the Other Way “

Christians Are Not Called to Have Amazing Sex by R Pietka, and the SCCL Push-Back

Christians Are Not Called to Have Amazing Sex by R Pietka – via Relevant Magazine, and the SCCL Push-Back

The essay “Christians Are Not Called to Have Amazing Sex” by Rachel Pietka was discussed over at Facebook group SCCL (Link): here a few days ago.

The consensus by the SCCL readership is that the page – by R. Pietka – is that it’s awful. Many in the SCCL thread did not approve of it or agree with it.

I don’t know why the SCCL readership largely condemned the page, because some of it is right in line with the ex-Christian, or liberal Christian views, about sex and sexual purity.

I’ll give you a long excerpt from the page before discussing it a bit more below:

(Link):  Christians Are Not Called to Have Amazing Sex by R Pietka

What Christians need to remember about God’s design for sex.

…While the [Christian based sexual abstinence] movement is great at detailing— and exaggerating—the benefits of saving sex for marriage, it is dishonest about the challenges abstinence presents to couples who eventually tie the knot.

…Jessica Ciencin Henriquez recently detailed how the abstinence movement affected her sex life and marriage in a revealing article titled, (Link): “My Virginity Mistake.”

Henriquez relays how she pledged herself to Jesus at a purity ceremony at age 14, remained a virgin until she married six years later, and wound up divorced after she and her husband could not make things work in the bedroom.

Looking back, Henriquez states if she had not insisted on waiting for sex until marriage, she could have prevented her divorce.

Henriquez’s story is important because it highlights an issue the abstinence movement rarely acknowledges: sexual incompatibility within marriage.

While this issue may seem irrelevant, it is actually fundamental to traditional Christian beliefs about sex. The fact that sexual compatibility does not matter to Christians when choosing a spouse makes the shocking and countercultural statement that sex is not our God.

Continue reading “Christians Are Not Called to Have Amazing Sex by R Pietka, and the SCCL Push-Back”

Single, Virgin Women Do Not Have Another Standard by Which to Be Saved, Contra Complementarian Group CBMW

Single, Virgin Women Do Not Have Another Standard by Which to Be Saved, Contra Complementarian Group CBMW

The Bible does teach that people should remain virgins until marriage, but oddly, some Christians do things like omit men from this teaching (as though virginity applies only to women).

In this case, they seem to be conflating being single, and a virgin, with receiving salvation, as though there’s some other standard by which others are saved. Christians also frequently make much too much out of the marriage analogy, in which they pretty much seem to suggest that a person has to be married (and having sex) to truly know God or be in relationship with God.

Via the Biblical Personhood blog:

(Link): Is “Biblical” manhood and womanhood compatible with the gospel of Christ?

The Biblical Personhood blog reproduces this quote from a Council for Biblical Manhood and Womanhood resource:

[from complementarian, CBMW, material:]

48. How can a Christian single woman enter into the mystery of Christ and the Church if she never experiences marriage?
[Their answer promotes offering your virginity to God. Nothing about becoming a Christian.] – CBMW, “Fifty Crucial Questions, Question 48

… The mystery of Christ and the church, likewise, is not about marriage or celibacy. Jesus loved you – male or female, single or married or divorced or widowed – first. Know you are loved by God, love God back, experience God’s love, and see how it never ends, and how it changes you to live for Him.

Continue reading “Single, Virgin Women Do Not Have Another Standard by Which to Be Saved, Contra Complementarian Group CBMW”

The Rise Of Born-Again Virgins by L. Barr

The Rise of The Born-Again Virgin

This is actually a rather old topic. I’ve discussed it in older posts such as (Link) this one.

I’m not a big fan of this “Born Again Virgin” terminology.

Regarding consensual sex (yes, I said consensual, because anti-Sexual Purity types always want to conflate or confuse consensual sex with sexual assault in order to dismiss the entire concept of sexual purity), either one is a virgin or is not.

If you’ve had consensual sex previously but are abstaining afterwards, I think the word “celibate” would be suitable and acceptable. You’re certainly not a “virgin” and so should not go by the “born again” term.

The Rise Of Born-Again Virgins by L. Barr

Miranda Kerr and Ciara aren’t alone – here’s why more women are skipping sex, pre-marriage.

…We’re not talking surgical reconstruction of the hymen here. Becoming a born again virgin isn’t a physical concept, it’s more a conscious decision to abstain from sex until you’re married. Essentially, it’s free virginity pass, even if you’ve already done the deed a plenty, or in Kerr’s case, had a child.

…Meanwhile back in 2008, Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon also declared their abstinence. “We both have similar beliefs, and I just thought that it would be so much more special if we waited until after we were married,” said Carey at the time. She divorced Cannon in 2014. Plus sized, supermodel Ashley Graham says she’d “sowed her oats” so she decided to wait until after she married her husband, Justin Ervin. When US songstress Ciara, who has a son with the rapper Future, got together with now-husband and Seattle Seahawks Quarterback, Russell Wilson, he proudly told the world they had decided not to have sex before their marriage.

‘I’m happier not hooking up’

However, it is not just celebrities that are abstaining from physical intimacy. Jo, a 28-year-old single, retail manager from Melbourne, relates to their desire to wait.

She has put the breaks on all sexual relationships until she’s found a man whose willing to put a ring on it.

Continue reading “The Rise Of Born-Again Virgins by L. Barr”

Talking With Both Daughters and Sons About Sex – article via NY Times

Talking With Both Daughters and Sons About Sex

You will notice that this study which is mentioned below describes how sexual stereotypes influence how parents teach their kids about sex: daughters (girls) are encouraged to be abstinent and to delay sex, but not boys.

I see this same exact (sexist) pattern among Christian families: Christians buy into secular stereotypes that girls should be as sexually pure as the freshly driven snow and Christians wrongly assume females lack a libido, but males are assumed to be sex-starved horn-dogs who lack control, and boys are not generally expected to remain celibate.

Ergo, females are taught in Christian sermons and other Christian content to sexually abstain. Christian boys don’t generally receive as much pressure or sermonizing on abstaining. There may be something “off” about Christian teachings about sex, since they are mirroring secular cultural assumptions about gender and sex in these matters.

On the other hand, regarding other (non sexual) topics, I can see how Christians might BENEFIT (or, ironically, be MORE in line with the Bible) if they went along with secular mores instead of with their incorrect biblical interpretation of some topics. But on this issue, they sound quite similar to secular culture, and are off they mark, I believe.

(Link): Talking With Both Daughters and Sons About Sex – via the New York Times

Excerpts:

Washington Post Editorial by Ruth Everhart: Virgin Mary Offends Rape Victims By Her Purity – and Re: Internalized Misogyny or Sexism

Washington Post Editorial by Ruth Everhart: Virgin Mary Offends Rape Victims By Her Purity

This anti-Purity Culture crusade has taken on new insane heights.

Sexual assault victims who write anti-Purity editorials keep confusing the issues of consensual sex with rape and wanting to toss out all of sexual purity teachings, which is in error. I have written of this phenomenon before, such as:

(Link): Confusing Sexual Assault and Sexual Abuse with Consensual Sex and Then Condemning Sexual Purity Teachings – and other, related topics

Related content by another author:

(Link):  We’re Casual About Sex and Serious About Consent. But Is It Working? by J. Zimmerman

Whether you like it or not, the Bible does say that Mary was a virgin, and that being a virgin is expected of both sexes unless or until a person marries.

I am over 40 yeas of age and am still a virgin – and I’m a woman. I was engaged to a man for a few years in my early 30s and had an opportunity to fornicate, but I resolved to wait until marriage. I broke things off with my ex and remain single to this day.

I do not appreciate anti-Virginity editorialists besmirching my choice to sexually abstain by belittling virginity itself, or by attributing my choice (made of my own free will) to “patriarchy.”

First, here are the pertinent links with excerpts, and I will resume my commentary below:

(Link): Our culture of purity celebrates the Virgin Mary. As a rape victim, that hurts me by Ruth Everhart, Dec 2016, Washington Post

Some guy wrote a brief rebuttal of sorts to that editorial:

(Link): Washington Post Editorial: Virgin Mary Offends Rape Victims By Her Purity

by THOMAS D. WILLIAMS, PH.D.
8 Dec 2016

In an article (Link): titled, “Our culture of purity celebrates the Virgin Mary. As a rape victim, that hurts me,” Ruth Everhart explains that especially in the Advent lead-up to Christmas, Mary becomes a problem for many Christians because of her pristine purity.

Mary “set an impossibly high bar,” Everhart writes. “Now the rest of us are stuck trying to be both a virgin and a mother at the same time.”

As a rape victim, this has been especially difficult for the author, she says, which led to her becoming a pastor, in order “to come to terms with Mary’s story.”

Everhart writes that she doesn’t blame her sense of ruin “entirely” on the Virgin Mary. In fact, it isn’t really Mary’s fault, she states; it’s the Church’s for manipulating Mary into a model of purity.

Continue reading “Washington Post Editorial by Ruth Everhart: Virgin Mary Offends Rape Victims By Her Purity – and Re: Internalized Misogyny or Sexism”