The Man Using Equations To Find Love

The Man Using Equations To Find Love

(Link): All you need is maths? The man using equations to find love

Mathematician Bobby Seagull has tried to use numbers to solve his romantic difficulties. Is he on to something?

by Ellie Hunt

They say love is a numbers game. Bobby Seagull – the mathematician who rose to fame as a finalist on University Challenge in 2017 – took them literally.

A few years ago, he sat down to try to work out why he had been so unlucky in life. “I was 32 or 33, I was single, I loved maths and science – I thought: ‘Can I use maths and science to help me?’ It was a genuine, earnest attempt.”

Inspired by Peter Backus – a Manchester University economics lecturer who in 2010 wrote a paper titled Why I Don’t Have a Girlfriend – Seagull used the Drake equation, developed to estimate how many intelligent alien civilisations there might be in the galaxy, to determine his number of potential partners. “You start by assuming there’s infinitely many, then you keep on making the pool smaller and smaller.”

….Numbers have long factored into the dating game, even for those who have a ropey grasp on them. We might wonder, of a couple’s particularly serendipitous origin story: “What are the chances?” Or we might console someone who is unhappily single that “it only takes one”.

Continue reading “The Man Using Equations To Find Love”

New York City Woman Turns 107: ‘The Secret’ Is ‘I Never Got Married’

New York City Woman Turns 107: ‘The Secret’ Is ‘I Never Got Married’ 

(Link): New York City Woman Turns 107: ‘The Secret’ Is ‘I Never Got Married’

Louise Signore celebrated her birthday on Wednesday and credited her long life to staying single

August 1, 2019

A New York City woman celebrating more than a century of life has some advice for other women looking to someday do the same: Don’t become a bride!

“I think the secret of 107 [is] I never got married. I think that’s the secret,” Louise Signore told WCBS with a laugh. “My sister says, ‘I wish I never got married!’ ”

Continue reading “New York City Woman Turns 107: ‘The Secret’ Is ‘I Never Got Married’”

Thoughts Regarding ‘Both Purity Culture and Hook-Up Culture Failed Me’ by A. Murrish

Thoughts Regarding ‘Both Purity Culture and Hook-Up Culture Failed Me’ by A. Murrish

First, here is a link to the page I will be discussing:

(Link): Both Purity Culture and Hook-Up Culture Failed Me

I don’t care for this editorial.

For one thing it sort of spiritualizes the status of singleness, which is grating to any adult over the age of 35, who had hoped to marry, but is still single.

Next, the author points to the church as a solution for singles.

She is essentially telling marriage-desiring singles to lose themselves in church, to find belonging in church groups.

The problem with this is that for many never-married adults (and some divorced and widowed) over the age of 30, most churches either ignore adult singles, or they insult adult singles, because they are too preoccupied with promoting marriage and catering to the needs of married couples.

Continue reading “Thoughts Regarding ‘Both Purity Culture and Hook-Up Culture Failed Me’ by A. Murrish”

Letter to Advice Columnist: ‘I’m A Virgin Age 55 and I Worry My Life is Wasted’

Letter to Advice Columnist: ‘I’m A Virgin Age 55 and I Worry My Life is Wasted’

I’m less perturbed by this guy’s homosexual orientation and more by his ageism. What is it with older men (LGBT or hetero) who insist on only boinking or dating and marrying much younger people?

And by the way: it’s a sad, sad misunderstanding and misconception by a lot of people that all people (or most) who are virgins or never-married by the age of 30 or 40 are all LGBT. That is not true! I too am a never married adult, am still a virgin, yet I am a hetero. I am NOT LGBT.

(Link): Dear Coleen: I’m a virgin age 55 and I worry my life is wasted

by C. Nolan
July 2019

Growing up in a small village community, I never felt comfortable declaring how I felt and only two or three people know the truth about me

Dear Coleen
I’m a 55-year-old gay man and I’ve known about my sexuality since my teens, but I’ve never had any sexual experiences or relationships with anyone.

I’m still a virgin and I keep my sexuality a closely guarded secret.

Continue reading “Letter to Advice Columnist: ‘I’m A Virgin Age 55 and I Worry My Life is Wasted’”

The War Over Marriage Is Raging; Single People Are Winning by B. DePaulo

The War Over Marriage Is Raging; Single People Are Winning by B. DePaulo

(Link):  The War Over Marriage Is Raging; Single People Are Winning

Excerpts:

Once again, the claim that marriage is greedy has people riled up

July 11, 2019

To everyone who has been rooting for, and working on, the telling of a more accurate and affirming story about single people, and the shattering of myths about married people, there is good news: We are winning.

Continue reading “The War Over Marriage Is Raging; Single People Are Winning by B. DePaulo”

Study Says More American Couples Meet Online and in Bars Now than Through Family, Friends (2019)

Study Says More American Couples Meet Online and in Bars Now than Through Family, Friends (2019)

I think it’s sad, frustrating, and unfortunate for Christian singles who’d like to marry that so many churches and Christians do NOT want to take practical steps to help marriage-desiring singles to get married.

And as this study shows, when that happens, when friends, family, and church community refuse to get involved, people use bars and dating sites.

I don’t understand the Christians who promote the “Equally Yoked” rule and yet won’t help Christian singles who’d like to marry – if you’re an “Equally Yoked” advocate (I am not one), wouldn’t you want to ensure that your Christian single friend marries another Christian, rather than take her chances and dates Non-Christians she meets on dating sites and at night clubs?

(Link): Our Deepest Fears Realized: Most Couples Meet Online Now

Meeting online is trending upward, and fewer and fewer people are meeting at work, school, or through friends or family.

Continue reading “Study Says More American Couples Meet Online and in Bars Now than Through Family, Friends (2019)”

What Christians Really Think About the Church’s Relationship Advice by Anna Broadway

What Christians Really Think About the Church’s Relationship Advice by Anna Broadway

The following article (book review) from Christianity Today covers several topics about singleness and the church I’ve been pointing out on this blog for literally years now.

One big point it brings up that I have: there are more single Christian women in the church than there are single Christian men. This means if a Christian single female insists upon following the “equally yoked” rule (that states a Christian may only marry another Christian), she will remain single.

If you are a single Christian woman who desires marriage, it is imperative you ditch the ‘equally yoked’ rule. You must learn to judge men based on their character, not what their stated religious beliefs are.

(Link): What Christians Really Think About the Church’s Relationship Advice by Anna Broadway

Excerpts:

New survey research sheds light on how believers navigate the stickier matters of dating and marriage.

July 10, 2019

Over the years, Christians have produced and read far more books on how relationships and singleness should work than on how these things actuallydo pan out. Vicky Walker’s new book Relatable: Exploring God, Love, & Connection in the Age of Choice, based on a survey of more than 1,400 people, aims to change that.

Walker writes from a more-or-less Protestant British perspective, but American Christians will find much they recognize.

Over the course of 12 chapters and several appendices, Relatable covers everything from the history of marriage to typical teachings on gender roles to, of course, sex. But she also gets into stickier matters like the role of technology and the church’s significant sex-ratio gap—the latter a topic that raises questions of dating outside the faith.

Continue reading “What Christians Really Think About the Church’s Relationship Advice by Anna Broadway”

Missing Tinder Date Woman Found Cut Into 14 Pieces, As Murder Suspect Blames ‘Rough Consensual Sex’ – by S. Lock

Missing Tinder Date Woman Found Cut Into 14 Pieces, As Murder Suspect Blames ‘Rough Consensual Sex’ – by S. Lock

(Link): Missing Tinder date woman found cut into 14 pieces, as murder suspect blames ‘rough consensual sex’

July 2019

A WOMAN who was murdered and found dumped in garbage bags after failing to return home from a Tinder date was cut up into 14 pieces, a court has heard.

Sydney Loofe, 24, was savagely murdered and dismembered before she was found dead and dumped in a field in December 2017 near Edgar, south-west of Omaha, about a month after she disappeared.

Aubrey Trail, 52, and his girlfriend Bailey Boswell, 25, have been chargedwith her murder.

Continue reading “Missing Tinder Date Woman Found Cut Into 14 Pieces, As Murder Suspect Blames ‘Rough Consensual Sex’ – by S. Lock”

People Using Tinder and Other Dating Apps Are ‘More Likely to Develop Eating Disorders, Take Laxatives or Use Steroids’ To Get Bodies Like ‘Unrealistic’ Celebrities

People Using Tinder and Other Dating Apps Are ‘More Likely to Develop Eating Disorders, Take Laxatives or Use Steroids’ To Get Bodies Like ‘Unrealistic’ Celebrities

(Link): People Using Tinder and Other Dating Apps Are ‘More Likely to Develop Eating Disorders, Take Laxatives or Use Steroids’ To Get Bodies Like ‘Unrealistic’ Celebrities

Excerpts:

May 2019

People who use dating apps such as Tinder may be up to 27 times as likely to use drastic or unhealthy techniques to try and stay slim.

Deliberately vomiting, taking laxatives and even using anabolic steroids is more common among dating app users, a study found.

Researchers found ‘unrealistic’ desires to look like celebrities on television and social media are driving people to damaging behaviour.

Continue reading “People Using Tinder and Other Dating Apps Are ‘More Likely to Develop Eating Disorders, Take Laxatives or Use Steroids’ To Get Bodies Like ‘Unrealistic’ Celebrities”

Unmarried and Childless Women Are the Happiest: 2019 Study

Unmarried and Childless Women Are the Happiest, Happiness Expert Claims

(Link): Women are happier without marriage and children, says new study

Behavioural scientist Paul Dolan says it’s time we reevaluated what success really means

(Link): Wondering why unmarried women without children are happiest? Listen to mothers and wives

Child-free women know that expecting something outside of yourself to bring happiness is a sure-fire way to end up disappointed

Continue reading “Unmarried and Childless Women Are the Happiest: 2019 Study”

It’s Not Too Late, And You’re Not Too Old

It’s Not Too Late, And You’re Not Too Old

I saw a Tweet by a lady the other day who said she is in her late 50s, that she would very much like to be in a serious relationship (she’s tired of being single, I think), and she was feeling discouraged because her friends are telling her that she is ‘too old to have a serious relationship at her age.’

No, she isn’t, and no, it’s not.

First of all, may I suggest that if you are constantly surrounded by recurrently negative friends and family, and ones who complain a lot and are fault-finders, who do things like talk negatively about your hopes, dreams, and goals, who tell you that your dreams will never come to pass, that you begin by limiting your time with these people?

Research has shown that it’s better for your mental health and increases your chances of success at whatever your goal is if you more often than not surround yourself with regularly positive people, and ones who support you and your goals.

If you are someone going through a difficult time right now, whatever your situation is, it’s not true that “you are too old” or “it’s too late” for your goal or dream in life.

This is for you.

(Link): Don’t Give Up On Your Dream

(Link): This Bride Found Love and Got Married At Age 93

(Link): 80 Year Old Bride Marries for First Time in Nursing Home

Continue reading “It’s Not Too Late, And You’re Not Too Old”

What Happened When Chonda Pierce Tried Online Dating

What Happened When Chonda Pierce Tried Online Dating

Pierce is a Christian stand-up comic.

There is an embedded audio file on the web page I am linking you to:

(Link): What Happened When Chonda Pierce Tried Online Dating

When it comes to comedy and faith, Chonda Pierce is unashamed.

Her bold, tell-it-like-it-is style has audiences begging her for more stories, and she delivers in the new documentary, Unashamed, in theaters May 7 and 9.

“It’s interesting, my life right now,” Pierce shares in a new interview. “I have my third documentary, and I’m still alive. You know, usually they do documentaries for dead people.”

Continue reading “What Happened When Chonda Pierce Tried Online Dating”

Problems With the Article ‘Tony Evans warns Satan attacking biblical manhood; society on ‘precipice’ of disaster’

Problems With the Article ‘Tony Evans warns Satan attacking biblical manhood; society on ‘precipice’ of disaster’

The article I will be addressing in this post:

(Link): Tony Evans warns Satan attacking biblical manhood; society on ‘precipice’ of disaster

Excerpt:

Evans told CP that until manhood is properly defined, culture cannot be saved.
—///—

I am a (Link): former gender complementarian, so I understand the outlook of a Tony Evans and guys like him, and many of the assumptions that are made about culture and gender roles, but these are views that I no longer share.

Gender Role malarky aside, one of my biggest problems with the views of Tony Evans brought forth in this article is that he is of the mindset -like many Christians are- that culture can or should be saved.

He further thinks that teaching Christian gender roles is the way to go about it.

As I’ve stated many times previously in other posts, the Bible says that Jesus Christ alone saves, and he saves on the individual level.

He doesn’t save groups or cultures.

Continue reading “Problems With the Article ‘Tony Evans warns Satan attacking biblical manhood; society on ‘precipice’ of disaster’”

Conservatives Have Now Abandoned All Pretense of Advocating For Sexual Abstinence and They Actually Lament the Lack of Fornication – The Bradford Wilcox Piece, 2019

Conservatives Have Now Abandoned All Pretense of Advocating For Sexual Abstinence and They Actually Lament the Lack of Fornication – The Bradford Wilcox Piece, 2019

The following piece at The Atlantic (“The Happiness Recession”) was written by marriage-idolater and anti-singleness bigot of The Institute for Family Studies, W. Bradford Wilcox, and co-writer Lyman Stone.

I’d like to remind any new-comers to this blog that I am a life long conservative. I am not a liberal.

Marriage Is Not A Guarantee For Good or Regular Sex

This moronic essay actually suggests that single adults having less sex is what has led to them reporting higher rates of unhappiness, if I’m understanding things correctly.

This, astonishingly, from a right wing organization, (Link): The Institute For Family Studies, that claims to promote “strong families,” and good Lord knows they are obsessed with promoting marriage, even if that comes at the expense of singleness.

The members of this organization regularly publish materials intended to scare, guilt, shame, or pressure single adults into getting married, because this organization exists to promote the nuclear family: hetero-marriage where the couple have children.

Continue reading “Conservatives Have Now Abandoned All Pretense of Advocating For Sexual Abstinence and They Actually Lament the Lack of Fornication – The Bradford Wilcox Piece, 2019”

Another Christianity Today Magazine Editorial Expects Single Women To Meet the Needs of Married Women – Christians Never Ask the Reverse

Another Christianity Today Magazine Editorial (2019) Expects Single Women To Meet the Needs of Married Women – Christians Never Ask the Reverse

I am a never-married woman who is over the age of 45, and I am childless. I had wanted to be married but never found the right guy, so I remain single.

I was a very devout Christian for many years, until a few years ago.

I did a blog post about (Link): another editorial on Christianity Today’s site, where a married woman with small children wrote a long piece extolling the virtues of single, childless women:
but only in the context of how she found single, childless women useful to her because they could provide her with free babysitting services that she could not obtain from her biological family, who lived 1,000 miles away.

Here again, in April 2019, is another editorial in the same vein: a piece that extols the wonders and virtues of how single, childless women can or should meet the needs of married women, especially married ones who have children and need free babysitting services and emotional support.

Now, if you’re the sort of single, childless woman who sincerely enjoys babysitting married women’s children, that is fine by me. But I am not one of them.

I’m not opposed to single, childless women caring for, or taking an interest in, other people’s children, if they so desire.

I am opposed to this when this is one of the only options presented to Christian women, however.

Continue reading “Another Christianity Today Magazine Editorial Expects Single Women To Meet the Needs of Married Women – Christians Never Ask the Reverse”

Actress Charlize Theron Says She’s Been Single For a Long Time and is Shockingly Available

I have older posts on this blog pointing out that just because a person is considered Marriage or Dating Material by American cultural standards – thin, pretty, wealthy – does not mean she (or he) will have success at dating (or marriage).

Here we have Charlize Theron, who I’d think most people would agree is a very beautiful woman, AND, she has a successful career, is probably very financially secure (due to her movie making career), yet, she’s not had a date in ten years, she says!

(Link): Charlize Theron Says She Wants Someone to ‘Step Up’ and Date Her (Exclusive)

Excerpts:

April 2019

Charlize Theron is ready for her next relationship.

ET’s Kevin Frazier spoke with the actress and her Long Shot co-star, Seth Rogen, at CinemaCon in Las Vegas on Thursday, where she revealed that she’s waiting for someone to “step up” and date her.

Continue reading “Actress Charlize Theron Says She’s Been Single For a Long Time and is Shockingly Available”

Dating App Horror Stories That Will Make You Feel Thankful You Are Single on Valentine’s Day by D. Cho

(Link): Dating App Horror Stories That Will Make You Feel Thankful You Are Single on Valentine’s Day by D. Cho

Excerpts:

As if dating wasn’t hard enough, dating apps have found a way to turn things from hard to damn near impossible. Between dodging catfishes to praying your date is a real person and not a bot, the odds of finding love through an app can feel pretty low.

But there’s no reason to give up — dating can help build character … right? Fortunately for you, these online daters have decided to share their worst dating app experiences so you don’t have to feel alone, reminiscing about the times you wish you never swiped right.

Robin, 37

“After going on too many first dates that weren’t panning out, including one where I drove 40 minutes to hear a guy brag about illegally squatting in a foreclosed house for a year, I decided to filter the guys I date like I do for work. (I sometimes cast guys for dating shows.)

Continue reading “Dating App Horror Stories That Will Make You Feel Thankful You Are Single on Valentine’s Day by D. Cho”

In Which U.S. Cities Do The Majority of Single Christians – Specifically Those Who Regularly Attend Church – Live? by B. Showalter

In Which U.S. Cities Do The Majority of Single Christians – Specifically Those Who Regularly Attend Church – Live? by B. Showalter

There have been so many articles released this past week pertaining to the topics I normally blog about here, I can barely keep up. Here’s another one.

The second article below is from The Christian Post (as I said below the Tweet of this that was put out by The Christian Post: “Does it really matter since most churches do not have over 30s age singles groups and/or they insult singles for being single?”)

(Link): Single Practicing Christians Tend to Be in Big Cities – via Barna

(Link): In which U.S. cities do the majority of single Christians – specifically those who regularly attend church — live?

Excerpts:

by B. Showalter, Feb 2019

Which U.S. cities do the majority of Christian singles call home?

The majority of Christian singles tend to dwell in large East Coast cities, according to Barna.

In a study (Link): released this week, researchers unpacked how much the dating and relationship landscape has changed in the U.S. Barna has consistently tracked for many years the relationship status of practicing Christians — defined as those who attend a religious service at least once a month, self-identify as Christian, and say their faith is important to them.

Continue reading “In Which U.S. Cities Do The Majority of Single Christians – Specifically Those Who Regularly Attend Church – Live? by B. Showalter”

What Divorce Lawyers Really Think About The Concept Of Soulmates by K. Borresen

(Link): What Divorce Lawyers Really Think About The Concept Of Soulmates By Kelsey Borresen

Excerpts

They’re not all as pessimistic about love as you might assume.

We asked divorce attorneys if they believe in the concept of soulmates, how they define the term, and how their personal and professional lives have influenced those beliefs. Here’s what they told us:

People can have multiple soulmates throughout their lives.

“I do not think soulmates are preordained or that there’s only one soulmate per person. But I do think there are people that are absolutely perfect for each other. I just don’t think everyone finds that person or any of the few that may be their perfect soulmate.

Continue reading “What Divorce Lawyers Really Think About The Concept Of Soulmates by K. Borresen”

Christians In Love With Non-Christians (and Their Christian “Friends” Who Object) by John Shore

Christians In Love With Non-Christians (and Their Christian “Friends” Who Object)

(Link): Christians In Love With Non-Christians (and Their Christian “Friends” Who Object)

Excerpts:

[The author reproduces some correspondence from Christian women who say they are or were dating Non-Christian men, but their Christian friends objected]

…You know what else is not a Christian thing to do (or what shouldn’t be, anyway)? Putting religious dogma ahead of being a friend.

Continue reading “Christians In Love With Non-Christians (and Their Christian “Friends” Who Object) by John Shore”