Family Values Won’t Stop Mass Shootings – Lawmaker Who Blamed Dayton Massacre on Same-Sex Marriage and Break Down of the Family Urged by GOP Leader to Resign

Family Values Won’t Stop Mass Shootings – Lawmaker Who Blamed Dayton Massacre on Same-Sex Marriage and Break Down of the Family Urged by GOP Leader to Resign

I’m a conservative person and was a life-long Republican until 2014/2015. So, I’m certainly not a left wing, family- or family-values hating person.

However, I do believe that other conservatives over-estimate the importance of, or the effects of, the nuclear family, marriage, and “family values.”

I have (Link): plenty of examples on my blog of self-professing, God-fearing “family men,” who even tout family values, who do things like rape children or beat their wives.

Even if every one in our nation was married with children, and professed belief in Christ, we’d still continue to have sin – we’d have mass shootings, rapes, and the like.

Granted, if people were sincere about following Christ and his teachings, maybe some of those things would decline, but I don’t believe any of those things would give us a crime-free society.

The Bible doesn’t say any where the marriage, the nuclear family, and (Link): being a parent will make people into better, more ethical people. The Bible points people to Christ, not to marriage or pro-creation.

Family values, the family unit, marriage, and natalism have not stopped men from raping children and beating their wives – again, I have plenty examples on my blog of married men who are fathers to children who have been arrested for raping their own children, selling their own children to other men for sex, for beating and murdering their wives (see here and here).

And, by the way, I don’t think video games or homosexual marriage causes mass shootings, either. This lady is wrong.

(Link): Ohio lawmaker blames mass shootings on open borders, homosexuality, video games

Excerpts:

Candice Keller is a Republican state representative from Middletown, a small city 30 miles south of Dayton, where a gunman killed at least nine people and wounded 27 others early Sunday. In a now-deleted Facebook post, she wrote: “After every mass shooting, the liberals start the blame game. Why not place the blame where it belongs?”

 The post listed reasons Keller thought the United States is grappling with mass shootings, including “the breakdown of the traditional American family,”…

Thoughts Regarding ‘Both Purity Culture and Hook-Up Culture Failed Me’ by A. Murrish

Thoughts Regarding ‘Both Purity Culture and Hook-Up Culture Failed Me’ by A. Murrish

First, here is a link to the page I will be discussing:

(Link): Both Purity Culture and Hook-Up Culture Failed Me

I don’t care for this editorial.

For one thing it sort of spiritualizes the status of singleness, which is grating to any adult over the age of 35, who had hoped to marry, but is still single.

Next, the author points to the church as a solution for singles.

She is essentially telling marriage-desiring singles to lose themselves in church, to find belonging in church groups.

The problem with this is that for many never-married adults (and some divorced and widowed) over the age of 30, most churches either ignore adult singles, or they insult adult singles, because they are too preoccupied with promoting marriage and catering to the needs of married couples.

I Called Off My Engagement. I Didn’t Feel God’s Peace. by L. Wilbert

I Called Off My Engagement. I Didn’t Feel God’s Peace. by L. Wilbert

I’m not sure I agree completely with this editorial, which I have linked to and excerpted further below. I think it over-spiritualizes things.

When I was engaged, I didn’t feel God’s peace of lack thereof. I had to decide for myself if the guy I was engaged to was right or not. After several years together, I prayed for guidance, because I didn’t know if I should stay or go.

I never did get any guidance from God, not even when I was praying hardest. I ultimately had to make up my own mind.

I really wish that Christians would stop offering this view that if one just trusts God, that God will direct one’s life choices (such as if to marry a certain person or not).

God has never, ever guided me – not when I was engaged, not when I was in my twenties and asking God which college major and career I should pursue. I never felt God’s peace, nor did I feel God saying, “No” to any of those things (and I didn’t feel or hear God saying, “Yes,” either).

I think this article below is just as bad as those articles by Christians who claim God “led them” to their spouse, like the lady who says God sent her a spouse when she went for a walk on the beach (see links about all that at the bottom of this post, under “related”).

Sometimes, the Spirit is going to remain totally silent – the Spirit is not going to give you his blessing or with-hold it.

(Link): I Called Off My Engagement. I Didn’t Feel God’s Peace. by L. Wilbert

Excerpts:

Looking for the right fit in a spouse is often less important than praying for the Spirit’s blessing.

Twisted Rapist Dad ‘Not Satisfied With Sex Attacks’ Turned Into Serial Killer

Twisted Rapist Dad ‘Not Satisfied With Sex Attacks’ Turned Into Serial Killer

Do Marriage and Parenthood, as so many pro-Nuclear Family Christians and conservative think tanks suggest, improve people or make society better, or cause individuals to become more godly, ethical, responsible, and loving? Nope. Here’s another example.

(Link): Twisted Rapist Dad ‘Not Satisfied With Sex Attacks’ Turned Into Serial Killer

Excerpts:

William Choyce raped and murdered three women and sexually attacked several others – he is now on death row

William Choyce seemed like the perfect, middle-class family man – but he was hiding a dark secret behind his respectable facade.

To the outside world, he looked like the perfect husband and father but Choyce is hiding a sinister sexual deviation.

Crime+Investigation’s I Lived With A Killer examines what drove a seemingly devoted dad and partner to become a serial rapist and murder .

Growing up in “good” family, Choyce wanted for little and along with his parents, went along to church every Sunday.

Mother of a Two-Day-Old Baby That Was Burned To Death as Part of a Satanic Ritual Has Been Caught by Police (Child’s Father Also Involved in Baby’s Murder)

Mother of a Two-Day-Old Baby That Was Burned To Death as Part of a Satanic Ritual Has Been Caught by Police (Child’s Father Also Involved in Baby’s Murder)

In light of the appearance of news stories such as this one (link below), I never again want to hear Christians or “pro family” propaganda organizations acting as though single or child-free or childless adults are “less” than married people who have children.

I never again want to see their pro-Nuclear Family, pro-Marriage propaganda spewed, where they frequently argue or suggest that marriage (or parenthood) makes (and is necessary to make) people more godly, responsible, mature, and ethical.

(Link): MOTHER OF BABY BURNED TO DEATH IN SATANIC RITUAL ARRESTED AFTER TWO YEARS ON THE RUN

Excerpts:

July 2019
by A. Joyner

The mother of a two-day-old baby that was burned to death as part of a satanic ritual has been apprehended by police after evading capture for two years.

Mom and Dad ‘Fantasized About Raping Their Own Unborn Baby’ by Debbie White

Mom and Dad ‘Fantasized About Raping Their Own Unborn Baby’ by Debbie White

Ah, tell me again, Southern Baptist talking head Al Mohler and other conservative Christians and secular conservatives how parenthood supposedly makes people more godly, responsible, giving, self-less, and ethical, especially in light of headlines such as this one.

(Link): Mom and Dad ‘Fantasized About Raping Their Own Unborn Baby’

Excerpts:

July 8, 2019

A MUM and dad “fantasised about committing incest with their unborn baby” after sexually assaulting their two-year-old daughter, horrific court papers reveal.

Gerrad Coddington, 25, and Christina Nelson-Coddington, 29, allegedly handcuffed, beat and raped the toddler, says an affidavit lodged in Oklahoma, US.

Mom Accused of Murdering Toddler Son Because He Was Interfering With Extramarital Affair by Harriet Sokmensuer

Mom Accused of Murdering Toddler Son Because He Was Interfering With Extramarital Affair by Harriet Sokmensuer

Are nuclear families and motherhood better for society? Does motherhood make women more godly, loving, and mature, as so many Christians and secular conservative think tanks teach? Why no, no it does not. As this news story clearly illustrates (even more examples of this on my blog (Link): here and (Link): here.

(Link): Mom Accused of Murdering Toddler Son Because He Was Interfering With Extramarital Affair by Harriet Sokmensuer

Excerpt:

June 2019

A New Jersey mother is accused of smothering her toddler son because she saw him as an impediment to the extramarital affair she was having.

On Tuesday, 41-year-old Heather Reynolds appeared before a Camden County judge for a detention hearing. She is charged with murder, endangering the welfare of a child, possession of methamphetamine and hindering apprehension in connection with the May 2018 death of her son, Axel, ABC6, CBS3, NJ.com report.

Text messages recovered from her phone showed Reynolds and a man had been having an affair while her husband was working out of state, Assistant Prosecutor Peter Gallagher alleged in court, NJ.com reports.

Priest Who Urged Women to Cover Their Shoulders To Protect Men’s ‘Purity” Calls Twitter ‘Demonic’ – Wipes Account

Priest Who Urged Women to Cover Their Shoulders To Protect Men’s ‘Purity” Calls Twitter ‘Demonic’ – Wipes Account

When will men – especially conservative, religious, men – stop blaming women for the men’s sexual hang ups and sexual sins? It is not a woman’s responsibility to dress a certain way to keep a man “from stumbling.”

You men are responsible for your own thought lives and actions.

For one man, bare shoulders may be sexy, but to another, no. A woman cannot dress in such a way to please all men all the time. It’s subjective to a large degree.

I thought this sort of sexist kook-ery was the province of Baptists and Protestants only, but no, the Catholics are in on this nonsense as well.

(Link): Priest who urged women to cover their shoulders to protect men’s ‘purity’ calls Twitter ‘demonic’ – wipes account

Excerpts:

Last week a Catholic priest drew nationwide attention – and outrage – after taking to Twitter (Link): to urge women to cover their shoulders to protect men’s “purity.” The responses were what you might expect, mostly outrage and accusations of misogyny.  

Ask E. Jean: My Husband Will Not Shower

Ask E. Jean: My Husband Will Not Shower

So much for the conservative and Christian myth that marriage makes people more mature, godly, and responsible.

(Link): Ask E. Jean: My Husband Will Not Shower

How do I get the guy to be more into hygiene? I’ve tried everything!

Man Accidentally Burns His Wife’s Face Off, So He Divorces Her

Man Accidentally Burns His Wife’s Face Off, So He Divorces Her

The way this article reads, this man accidentally lit his wife’s face on fire – the dumb ass used a can of gas to pour on some camp fire flames to reignite the fire – and after she was hospitalized and came out disfigured, he left her.

What a dick he is.

I’ve heard this is pretty common – that often, in a marriage, if the wife becomes sick in some way, say she gets cancer or what not – most men will divorce the wife.

Most men do not want to act as caretaker to a sick spouse, because unlike women, men are raised and coddled in our society to be selfish (they expect women to wait on them, and dog knows that complementarian Christians in particular really promote this sick teaching), where-as we ladies are raised from the time we are kids to always put ourselves last and to cater to the needs of others no matter what.

I wish this lady well. She seems like she is doing better now.

I don’t want Christians telling me any more – or members of conservative think tanks who publish “studies” on marriage – that marriage makes people or culture better – because it does not.

Marriage does not make people less selfish, more loving, or more responsible – it sure as hell did not cause the man in this story to stand by his wife, even after he set her on fire and she was in enormous physical pain (and I’d imagine mental pain as well) for weeks or months.

Anyway, if I am grasping this correctly, this douche nozzle dumped his wife because she was disfigured because he accidentally set her on fire. He left her over something he was responsible for doing, incredible.

(Link): Georgia Mom, 29, Disfigured in Campfire Accident

by C Keating

It’s been almost three years since Courtney Waldon suffered third- and fourth-degree burns over her entire body from a campfire accident at her Georgia home. Now, she says, life couldn’t be better.

Unmarried and Childless Women Are the Happiest: 2019 Study

Unmarried and Childless Women Are the Happiest, Happiness Expert Claims

(Link): Women are happier without marriage and children, says new study

Behavioural scientist Paul Dolan says it’s time we reevaluated what success really means

(Link): Wondering why unmarried women without children are happiest? Listen to mothers and wives

Child-free women know that expecting something outside of yourself to bring happiness is a sure-fire way to end up disappointed

Problems With the Article ‘Tony Evans warns Satan attacking biblical manhood; society on ‘precipice’ of disaster’

Problems With the Article ‘Tony Evans warns Satan attacking biblical manhood; society on ‘precipice’ of disaster’

The article I will be addressing in this post:

(Link): Tony Evans warns Satan attacking biblical manhood; society on ‘precipice’ of disaster

Excerpt:

Evans told CP that until manhood is properly defined, culture cannot be saved.
—///—

I am a (Link): former gender complementarian, so I understand the outlook of a Tony Evans and guys like him, and many of the assumptions that are made about culture and gender roles, but these are views that I no longer share.

Gender Role malarky aside, one of my biggest problems with the views of Tony Evans brought forth in this article is that he is of the mindset -like many Christians are- that culture can or should be saved.

He further thinks that teaching Christian gender roles is the way to go about it.

As I’ve stated many times previously in other posts, the Bible says that Jesus Christ alone saves, and he saves on the individual level.

He doesn’t save groups or cultures.

Widow Whose Husband Died Sues Over ‘Loss of Sex’

Widow Whose Husband Died Sues Over ‘Loss of Sex’

So, being married does not, contra conservative and Christian propaganda I heard often while growing up, guarantee an end to loneliness (if your spouse dies), and it does not guarantee hot, steady sex.

(Link): Woman whose husband died sues for £650k over ‘loss of SEX’

Jamie Finnegan was left brain-damaged and passed away in 2018 after a procedure at Brisbane Hospital went wrong six years ago

By Jenny Awford

THE widow of a husband who died after a botched medical treatment is suing the Australian government for £650,000 over a loss of sex.

Response to the Alex Parker Piece ‘Feminist Rages Against GirlPal ‘Galentine’s Day,’ Says No Women Are Lonely, Praises Group Vomiting’

Response to the Alex Parker Piece ‘Feminist Rages Against GirlPal ‘Galentine’s Day,’ Says No Women Are Lonely, Praises Group Vomiting’

A conservative editorialist at the Town Hall site, Alex Parker (who I assume is a man), mocks an (Link): anti-Galentine’s Day essay written by a secular, liberal feminist named Rachel Hosie.

“Galentine’s Day” is a new holiday where women friends can celebrate their friendships with each other on February 13th.

The secular feminist that Parker is responding to believes that Galentine’s Day is patronizing to single women, so she is not in support of the holiday.

As a never-married woman who is over 45 years of age who had wanted to be married, but it didn’t come to pass for me, I came to terms with being never-married years ago, so Valentine’s Day no longer bothers me the way it used to.

I don’t have strong feelings for or against Galentine’s Day.

While Hosie’s contention may be true that Galentine’s Day is patronizing towards single adulthood (which is a bad thing), I see it as ultimately a harmless day for women to spend enjoying the friendship of their women friends, so I don’t object to the holiday.

I do however object to a few of the points that Parker made while trying to dismantle Hosie’s arguments.

I will provide excerpts from the Parker editorial and then offer my observations:

(Link): Feminist Rages Against GirlPal ‘Galentine’s Day,’ Says No Women Are Lonely, Praises Group Vomiting

Excerpts:

[Hosie the liberal feminist writes,]

Actually, we don’t need your pity — and the whole concept perpetuates the ridiculous myth of the sad, single woman.

[To which conservative Parker replies,]

The ridiculous myth?? How is it a myth, and how is it ridiculous?

Men want women, and women want men; that’s why we have February 14th … Thursday’s gonna find some people without dates; some portion of those will have ovaries; and some of those are gonna be none too thrilled.

Oh, wait — I forgot; this is 2019.

Okay…women aren’t women and men aren’t men and women don’t have to be like men or women, and there are no men or women…
–(end quotes)—-

My comments regarding this portion of the exchange:

Spinsters and Crazy Cat Ladies

I cannot believe Parker is feigning ignorance of the “sad, pathetic” single woman trope.

Being a conservative who is critiquing a liberal or feminist essay does not mean having to act ignorant of certain societal truths in the process.

Christian School Teacher Whose Spouse Caught Her in Bed With Teen Sentenced by J. Salo

Christian School Teacher Whose Spouse Caught Her in Bed With Teen Sentenced by J. Salo

Does marriage make people more sexually pure, godly, loving, mature, or ethical, as so many Christians and politically conservative talking heads claim?

No, it does not.

This is the 100th millionth example on this blog of a married person who committed a serious sin.

Marriage does not make people more mature, godly, responsible, or ethical; “the family” or “marriage” will not save or fix a society.

Is married Christian sex “mind blowing,” as so much Christian teaching regarding sexual behavior suggests? Apparently not, if Christian wives like this feel the need to have sexual relations with a teen. Her husband wasn’t quite doing it for her.

Does someone have to obtain a standard of moral perfection, or some other criteria, before God will grant that person a spouse, as so many blogs, articles, and sermons by Christians suggest? No, obviously not, otherwise, this woman, who ended up being a skanky pervert, would not have gotten married.

(Link): Christian School Teacher Whouse Spouse Caught Her in Bed With Teen Sentenced by J. Salo

Excerpts:

February 11, 2019

A former Christian school teacher whose husband caught her in bed with a student was sentenced to prison, according to officials.

Andrea Nicole Baber, who taught at Logos Christian Academy, was ordered Friday to serve 20 months in prison for having sex with a student in Springfield, Oregon, (Link): the Register-Guard reported.

The 30-year-old educator pleaded guilty last month to rape and contributing to the sexual delinquency of a minor.

Single Men Are Smellier Than Those Who Have a Partner, Study Claims (And It May Help Signal Their Relationship Status to Women)

Single Men Are Smellier Than Those Who Have a Partner, Study Claims (And It May Help Signal Their Relationship Status to Women)

(Link): Single Men Are Smellier Than Those Who Have a Partner, Study Claims (And It May Help Signal Their Relationship Status to Women)

Excerpts:

By Cheyenne MacDonald, Feb 2019

Single men tend to have stronger body odor than their coupled counterparts, according to a new study.

And, it may actually work in their favor.

Man Arrested For Killing Family, Stealing $210,000 To Send To Woman He Met on Porn Site

Man Arrested For Killing Family, Stealing $210,000 To Send To Woman He Met on Porn Site

I cannot figure out why other conservatives (including Christians) remain so keen on the whole “Defend the Nuclear Family” shtick, when it’s obvious that nuclear families, parenting, or marriage do not make people more moral, kind, responsible, and all the other things they say it will.

(Link): Man Arrested For Killing Family, Stealing $210,000 To Send To Woman He Met on Porn Site

Excerpts:

Grant Amato said he had argued with his parents over his relationship with the woman and that they told him he could have no contact with her if he wanted to continue living at their home.

January 29, 2018

SANFORD, Fla. — A Florida man killed his parents and brother after he was kicked out of his home and accused of stealing $210,000 from his family to send to a woman he had met on a porn website, according to a sheriff’s office.

Grant Amato, 29, has been charged with three counts of first-degree murder in the deaths of his parents, Chad and Margaret Ann Amato, and brother Cody.

 Seminole County Sheriff’s Office deputies found the victims’ bodies Friday in their Chuluota home after a co-worker reported that Cody Amato had not shown up for work.

‘I Almost Drove My Car Off A Bridge Because Of The Strain of Having a Family’

‘I Almost Drove My Car Off A Bridge Because Of The Strain of Having a Family’

I’m not exactly anti-marriage or anti-family, but.

However. I am tired of how other conservatives or how 99% of Christians “hype” marriage, children, and “the family” to the point they act as though everyone should get married and have a kid, and if you do not, they suggest or state point blank, that you have failed culture and society, and you’re a big Loser. Christians especially behave as though getting married and having a kid is a commandment from God (it is not).

Being married and being a mother did not bring happiness to this lady.

And notice how this lady says that she and her husband didn’t have sex for a year.

I bring that up, because one teaching I heard or saw a lot in Christian sermons or books when I was a kid growing up is that if one remains a virgin until marriage, that God will reward you and your spouse with regular, “mind blowing” sex. The reality is, a person can remain chaste but then end up having lousy sex in marriage, or none at all.

(Link): BABY BLUES – We rowed [argued] and hadn’t had sex for a year due to the strain of starting a family… I almost drove my car off a bridge

January 2019

Aimee and Davin Bradley, both 35, were at each other’s throats for the first three years of their daughter’s life

By Hayley Richardson

HAVING a baby can feel like the icing on the cake for some couples but for others the strain of starting a family can push them to breaking point.

Aimee and Davin Bradley, both 35, were at each other’s throats for the first three years of their daughter Autumn’s life and didn’t have sex for a year.

Woman, Age 86, Beats Her 89 Year Old Husband To Death With A Cane

Woman, Age 86, Beats Her 89 Year Old Husband To Death With A Cane

I really do want conservative think tanks, pro-family groups, conservative television host Tucker Carlson, and complementarian or conservative Christians to explain to me how marriage or “the family” makes society better, or how marriage is necessary to make a person mature, godly, or a “true” adult,  when I keep seeing so many news stories of married people who kill each other, or news items about husbands who are caught using child porn, beating their wives, or visiting prostitutes.

Marriage did not do anything to make this woman behave in a godly, mature, kind-hearted nature towards her husband.

I am someone who is over the age of 45, I’ve never been married, and I deeply resent conservative talk show hosts or “pro-family” Christian groups who keep acting as though everyone needs to be married, and if they are not, they are ruining society or are incapable of being godly and mature.

The Bible teaches that being single is fine with God – see 1 Corinthians chapter 7. No where does the Bible teach that marriage is mandatory for any reason – not to “save” culture or to make people more “godly.”

This article says that the wife may have dementia or mental health problems – well, did marriage keep this woman from developing mental health issues? No, it did not.

Christians and conservatives need to stop holding marriage or “the family” up as some kind of magical fix-alls.

(Link): Woman, Age 86, Beats Her 89 Year Old Husband To Death With A Cane

An elderly Florida woman beat her husband to death with a cane on Saturday, police said.

Ramona Maxine Lund, 86, from Pace, is charged with 89-year-old Francis Lund’s murder,the Orlando Sentinel reported. She is the oldest person in the county to be charged with murder, Santa Rosa County Sheriff Bob Johnson said at a press conference Monday.

The Misguided Backlash Against ‘Purity Culture’ by G. Shane Morris

The Misguided Backlash Against ‘Purity Culture’ by G. Shane Morris

I agree with most of this editorial by Morris, but I have one slight area of disagreement, which I will discuss below the link and excerpts.

All in all, this is an excellent editorial, so you will want to click the link below to go to Patheos, where it’s hosted, to read it in its entirety, but please remember to come back to this blog post to read some of my comments much farther below.

(Link): The Misguided Backlash Against ‘Purity Culture’

by G. Shane Morris
December 2018

[Author Morris discusses an anti-Purity Culture, anti- I Kissed Dating Goodbye editorial by Abigail Rine Favale, and refutes some of her arguments.]

…But one thing I’ve noticed is how many of those complaints come from people who admit they never took Harris’ advice in the first place. Favale is one of them.

She confesses: “I opted for more conventional forms of kissing and bade farewell to my virginity instead.” Nevertheless, she claims, “the ideas in Harris’ book influenced me—if not my habits, certainly my sense of self.”

It’s not clear what she means by this, except perhaps that she felt guilty about having premarital sex. No one needs Joshua Harris to experience the prick of conscience, though. Which is why one detects in recriminations against “purity culture” by those who openly engaged in impurity more than a hint of sour grapes.