Woman Cancels Dream Wedding to Her ‘Best Friend’ After Discovering He Watches Lots of Porn

Woman Cancels Dream Wedding to Her ‘Best Friend’ After Discovering He Watches Lots of Porn

Christian sociologist Mark Regnerus would guilt trip or shame this woman into (Link): marrying the dirt bag anyway, because he, like a lot of Christian, does not value singleness, and he doesn’t respect women’s boundaries.

I assume this guy is looking at adult- on- adult porn. I think the only thing worse than that are, as I’ve read of, Christian women who discover the guy they married is a pedophile who looks at child porn.

Of course all the porn-viewing horn dogs are chiding this woman below the article on the site, and under the Tweet.

(Link): Woman cancels dream wedding to her ‘best friend’ after discovering he watches lots of porn

August 2018

Claire Dalton had just a week to go until her dreams came true and she got married, but her whole world came crashing down before she made it down the aisle

….In a blog post written for (Link): Love What Matters , 21-year-old Claire revealed that since she was a young girl she had been dreaming of a love that was “true and pure” and “governed by God’s law”.

This is what she thought she’d found with her fiancé.

Continue reading “Woman Cancels Dream Wedding to Her ‘Best Friend’ After Discovering He Watches Lots of Porn”

The Soul Mate Myth by B. Kristian

The Soul Mate Myth by B. Kristian

I don’t know if I agree or disagree with this.

(Link): The Soul Mate Myth

I have been married six years, which is not very long, but long enough to get me out of newlywed territory and into the conviction that I can speak with some authority on the subject. So let me tell you: Your soulmate does not exist. (And even if they did — which they don’t — you would almost certainly never find them.)

I mention this for those who remain single to search for their mythical soulmate. Yet it is maybe even more important for others who have dated for years, deferring marriage indefinitely in favor of cohabitation in an effort to be sure their partner is really and truly perfect for them.

But no one is perfect — for you or anyone else.

Continue reading “The Soul Mate Myth by B. Kristian”

How Sex Robots Could Revolutionize Marriage—for the Better by M. Adshade

(Link):  How Sex Robots Could Revolutionize Marriage—for the Better

Excerpts

Some elements of that social change might be easier to anticipate than others. For example, the share of the young adult population that chooses to remain single (with their sexual needs met by robots) is very likely to increase.

Because social change is organic, however, adaptations in other social norms and behaviors are much more difficult to predict. But this is not virgin territory.

New technologies completely transformed sexual behavior and marital norms over the second half of the 20th century. Although getting any of these predictions right will surely involve some luck, we have decades of technology-induced social change to guide our predictions about the future of a world confronted with wholesale access to sexbots.

Continue reading “How Sex Robots Could Revolutionize Marriage—for the Better by M. Adshade”

Man Ordered to Tell Police Before Having Sex Infects Two Women With HIV

Man Ordered to Tell Police Before Having Sex Infects Two Women With HIV

(Link): Man Ordered to Tell Police Before Having Sex Infects Two Women With HIV

Zoe DrewettWednesday 15 Aug 2018 6:23 pm

A man who has been told to tell police if he wants to have sex with someone has admitted infecting two women with HIV.

Aaron Sutcliffe, 29, today pleaded guilty to unlawfully and maliciously inflicting grievous bodily harm by having sex with a woman between January and May 2016.

He previously pleaded guilty to the same offence at an earlier hearing in June for having sex with another woman between January 2009 and September 2010.

Continue reading “Man Ordered to Tell Police Before Having Sex Infects Two Women With HIV”

Why You Will (Eventually) Marry the Right Person by D. Teller

Why You Will (Eventually) Marry the Right Person by D. Teller

(Link): Why You Will (Eventually) Marry the Right Person by D. Teller

Excerpts:

As 2016 drew to a close last month, I opened my newsfeed with dread, braced for more gloomy tidings. Sure enough, amidst the news round-ups and “best of” lists was The New York Times’ most popular article of the year: “Why You Will Marry the Wrong Person.”

…For readers not familiar with the article, written by best-selling philosopher Alain de Botton, allow me to summarize. The author begins with the perceptive, if bleak, observation that humans are terrible at choosing good mates.

Continue reading “Why You Will (Eventually) Marry the Right Person by D. Teller”

The Study of Why Men Stay Single: What No One Is Telling You by B. DePaulo

The Study of Why Men Stay Single: What No One Is Telling You by B. DePaulo

According to DePaulo, aspects of this study are very victim-blaming and tell single men, ‘the reason you’re still single is that you are a big, fat, loser.’ (This is the sort of rhetoric that single women usually receive.)

(Link): The Study of Why Men Stay Single: What No One Is Telling You by B. DePaulo

Excerpts:

… If you are not familiar with Reddit, take a look at Andrew Marantz’s New Yorker (Link): article. He notes, for example, that on Google, three of the top auto-completions for Reddit are “toxic,” “cancer,” and “hot garbage.”

Presumably not all the Reddit threads are terrible, but the one in which users answered the question, “Guys, why are you single?”, drew comments such as:

-“Jesus titty-fucking Christ, this whole thread is depressing as fuck. If you like being single you can stop reading.”
-“This thread is Reddit at it’s finest.” [sic]

…The answer he expected to find came from his evolutionary perspective: In the past, marriages were arranged, so men did not have to have any social skills to have a mate.

Now, however, “men who have difficulty flirting or are unable to impress the opposite sex may remain single because their (Link): social skills have not evolved to meet today’s societal demands.”

Also important to Apostolou’s perspective is the assumption that men generally do not want to be single.

The entire empirical test of those ideas was that one Reddit thread [that asked men of that site why they think they are single].

In what strikes me as a very poor decision, the journal Evolutionary Psychological Science published Apostolou’s article. The title is, “Why men stay single? Evidence from Reddit.”

Continue reading “The Study of Why Men Stay Single: What No One Is Telling You by B. DePaulo”

When You Fall in Love, This Is What Facebook Sees by R. Meyer

When You Fall in Love, This Is What Facebook Sees by R. Meyer

(Link): When You Fall in Love, This Is What Facebook Sees

Excerpts:

Feb 2014

“During the 100 days before the relationship starts, we observe a slow but steady increase in the number of timeline posts shared between the future couple.”

Facebook might understand your romantic prospects better than you do.

In a blog post published yesterday, the company’s team of data scientists announced that statistical evidence hints at budding relationships before the relationships start.

Continue reading “When You Fall in Love, This Is What Facebook Sees by R. Meyer”

Society Has It Wrong: Married People Shouldn’t Get Benefits That Single People do Not by V. Larson

Society Has It Wrong: Married People Shouldn’t Get Benefits That Single People do Not by V. Larson

(Link): Society Has It Wrong: Married People Shouldn’t Get Benefits That Single People do Not by V. Larson

Excerpts:

….It seems, then, that single people have finally arrived [judged by all the attention adult singleness has received in the media in the last few years], poised to take their rightful place alongside married couples when it comes to status, power, and respect.

Except for one thing: single people still don’t have access to the legal benefits and protections the government grants to those who get married. In the US, there are more than (Link): 1,100 laws benefiting married couples, and that’s just at the federal level; many states offer perks and protections as well.

Continue reading “Society Has It Wrong: Married People Shouldn’t Get Benefits That Single People do Not by V. Larson”

A Stanford psychologist just disproved the oldest love advice in the book

A Stanford psychologist just disproved the oldest love advice in the book

(Link): A Stanford psychologist just disproved the oldest love advice in the book

Both science and intuition suggest that we choose our friends and romantic partners because we share things in common, such as age, educational level, race, religion, attitudes, and general intelligence.

But what role does personality play in attraction? Are conscientious people drawn to conscientious people? Extroverts to extroverts?

Until recently no one really knew, says Michal Kosinski, an assistant professor of organizational behavior at Stanford Graduate School of Business.

Continue reading “A Stanford psychologist just disproved the oldest love advice in the book”

Country and Classic Rock Music Fans Get The Most Action on Dating Site, A New Survey Finds

Country and Classic Rock Music Fans Get The Most Action on Dating Site, A New Survey Finds

(Link): Country and classic rock fans get the most action on Plenty of Fish, a new survey finds

Excerpts:

by Nicole Lyn Peace

…Men who list country music as an interest on their Plenty of Fish dating profile receive 32% more messages from singles looking to mingle, while women who let their hair down to classic rock like Led Zeppelin, Queen and The Rolling Stones are 68% more likely to strike a chord with someone special, according to a new survey.

The online dating service scrolled through more than 9 million POF profiles to study the dating success of musically-minded singles on the app.

And it found male country music lovers have something to sing about.

Not only do they receive more in-app messages, but they are also 65% more likely to find their match on the app — perhaps because potential partners recognize that these cowboys are 49% less likely to be looking for just a quick hookup. (No wonder Blake Shelton is People’s Sexiest Man Alive for 2017; hold onto him, Gwen Stefani.)

Continue reading “Country and Classic Rock Music Fans Get The Most Action on Dating Site, A New Survey Finds”

Online Dating Study Says You’re Aiming Out Of Your League

Online Dating Study Says You’re Aiming Out Of Your League

This has always been more of a problem with men than with women.

I disagree with their study – the study, according to one article, says men have some success if they approach women out of their league.

Oh good lord no, don’t publish that – it will only encourage the losers, weirdos, or physically undeseireable to approach women more than they already do by giving them some kind of false hope. And that’s annoying.

This was especially a problem for me when I was college-aged – all the dorky guys who I had no interest in dating at all who would approach me thinking they had a shot, and they would not take “no” for an answer. They thought my “no” meant “try again, you can wear me down, and I’ll go out with you.”

(Link): Dude, She’s (Exactly 25 Percent) Out of Your League

Excerpts:

A massive new study of online dating finds that everyone dates aspirationally—and that a woman’s desirability peaks 32 years before a man’s does.

by Robinson Meyer

At this point, Elizabeth Bruch, a professor of sociology at the University of Michigan, crashes in to your thought process (and this news article).

Yep, she says. Leagues do seem to exist.

But you’re not alone in trying to escape yours: “Three-quarters, or more, of people are dating aspirationally,” she says. And according to a new study, users of online-dating sites spend most of their time trying to contact people “out of their league.”

In fact, most online-dating users tend to message people exactly 25 percent more desirable than they are.

Continue reading “Online Dating Study Says You’re Aiming Out Of Your League”

Majority of Heterosexuals Say They Won’t Date Trans Folk and That’s Discrimination Somehow – by Brett T.

Majority of Heterosexuals Say They Won’t Date Trans Folk and That’s Discrimination Somehow – by Brett T.

(Link): Majority of Heterosexuals Say They Won’t Date Trans Folk and That’s Discrimination Somehow – by Brett T.

Zhana Vrangalova late last month wrote a piece for Them about the results of a study by two Canadian researchers that showed that the vast majority of cisgender people (those who identify as their biological sex) would not consider dating a trans person, and that is just another example of the discrimination trans people suffer.

Of 958 participants in the study, only 12 percent said they would consider dating a trans woman or trans man.

Continue reading “Majority of Heterosexuals Say They Won’t Date Trans Folk and That’s Discrimination Somehow – by Brett T.”

Learning to See Your Single Neighbor by H. Stallcup

Learning to See Your Single Neighbor by H. Stallcup

(Link): Learning to See Your Single Neighbor

The more the church recognizes our worth, the better we can integrate into the church.

…Doing life alone. I’m far from the only single Christian who is regularly exhausted by it.

Singles who have great family and friends and churches still regularly experience loneliness and feelings of powerlessness. From ordinary Saturdays to life-changing events, singleness can often make you feel like you are hiding in plain sight.

This is not how it’s supposed to be. In the kingdom of God, partnership is not reserved for married couples.

Continue reading “Learning to See Your Single Neighbor by H. Stallcup”

If You’re Choosing Not to Have Kids, You’ll Want to Read This by K. Langslet

If You’re Choosing Not to Have Kids, You’ll Want to Read This by K. Langslet

(Link): If You’re Choosing Not to Have Kids, You’ll Want to Read This by K. Langslet

Excerpts:

I don’t know what it is about my decision to not have kids that absolutely infuriates so many people who have nothing to do with my womb or life choices, but the topic seems to come up on a weekly basis—sometimes even two or three times a week.

The thing is, I love children, and I totally respect the decision of my friends and family members who have had or plan on having kids. I just don’t want any of my own.

Continue reading “If You’re Choosing Not to Have Kids, You’ll Want to Read This by K. Langslet”

Married To Person With Kid From Previous Marriage: Guy Says His Wife is Putting Her Son Before Their Marriage – on Not Wanting to Date Single Parents

Married To Person With Kid From Previous Marriage: Guy Says His Wife is Putting Her Son Before Their Marriage – On Not Wanting to Date Single Parents

This following letter to an advice columnist (which is linked to and excerpted much farther down this blog post) is interesting, because I guarantee you had the guy written to “Ask Amy” of the “Ask Amy” column with the same concern, Amy would  not have been sympathetic to the guy.

Amy would’ve raked him over the coals for not oozing with love and compassion for the misbehaving stepchild.

Amy, as I’ve seen, always sides with the kids or the biological parent.

If you are a person married to someone who has a bratty kid who is driving you crazy (and even to the point of wanting to divorce!), Amy will shame you terribly over it.

Amy will scream and yell about you being selfish, and she will ask you to empathize with the misbehaving, rotten kid.

(That I can recall in all my years of reading her advice column, Amy has never shown empathy to the adult who is stressed and whose marriage is strained over a hard- to- handle step-child.)

This advice columnist,  though, takes the opposite approach and blames the biological mother; he holds her accountable for the poor marital dynamics.

Continue reading “Married To Person With Kid From Previous Marriage: Guy Says His Wife is Putting Her Son Before Their Marriage – on Not Wanting to Date Single Parents”

The Millennial Caregiver – from WSJ – Some Adult Singles Have No Choice But to Delay Marriage Because They Are Too Busy Acting As Caretakers to Elderly Family

Some Adult Singles Have No Choice But to Delay Marriage Because They Are Too Busy Acting As Caretakers to Elderly Family

(Link): The Millennial Caregiver

The Call to Care for Aging Parents Comes Sooner Now

More millennials are responsible for their parents and grandparents, sometimes derailing careers and family life.

… As the country grows older, its caregivers are growing younger and more squeezed. Millennials now make up 24% of the nation’s unpaid caregivers, up from 22% of young adult caregivers in 2009.

…Their numbers are expected to grow and so, too, are their challenges.

Maria Aranda, an associate professor of Social Work and Gerontology at the University of Southern California, says caregiving responsibilities can come at pivotal times in the lives of millennials and threaten to derail expected milestones, like starting families and buying a house. “Those things are being eclipsed,” says Dr. Aranda, who conducted a study of millennials … who are caring for those with dementia.

Continue reading “The Millennial Caregiver – from WSJ – Some Adult Singles Have No Choice But to Delay Marriage Because They Are Too Busy Acting As Caretakers to Elderly Family”

‘Jennifer Aniston is right that being childless does not define you’

‘Jennifer Aniston is right that being childless does not define you’

(Link): ‘Jennifer Aniston is right that being childless does not define you

Excerpts:

August 2018

Jennifer Aniston is right that being childless does not define you — the Friends star and Kylie Minogue shouldn’t have to justify themselves
Friends legend Jennifer Aniston has been met with quizzical responses to her personal decision not to procreate

FOR two decades, Jennifer Aniston has been the subject of frenzied and almost constant speculation about when she would become a mum. Most frustratingly for her, it was always a question of when and not if.

After all, how could a beautiful rich woman with an equally beautiful and rich man(whether it be Brad Pitt, John Mayer or Justin Theroux) possibly not want to have beautiful babies together?

…This week, Jen had enough, letting rip in her most forthright interview ever to InStyle magazine.

Continue reading “‘Jennifer Aniston is right that being childless does not define you’”

Mega Church Preacher Bill Hybels in Trouble Again For More Sexual Harassment

Mega Church Preacher Bill Hybels in Trouble Again For More Sexual Harassment (2018)

I don’t think I ever blogged about this Hybels guy before.

He was first in the news many months ago for sexually harassing several different women in his church years before, who had worked as church staff.

His church first denied that this was true, and they attempted to say the women who stepped forward to discuss their harassment or abuse by this guy were lying.

There are so many of these pervy pastors it’s hard to keep up with them all. If all I ever did was blogged about perverted pastors, it would be a full time job, and I’d never have a break from this blog!

I’m pretty sure that Hybels is a married guy, too. Christians keep teaching that marriage is necessary to make a person a godly, responsible adult, and to keep them out of sexual sin, but as we see (yet once again!) marriage does not necessarily instill character into anyone, nor does it keep anyone from sexual sin or from sexually abusing others.

Let this story also go to show that a person does NOT have to become perfect, godly, or sinless to “earn” a spouse from God.

Yes, there are some Christians out there who teach that if you are single and want to get married, God will with-hold your spouse from you unless you become more godly, mature, or whatever quality. As  you can see from news reports such as this one, that is total bunk.

God did not withhold a spouse from Hybels (again, I’m fairly certain he has a wife), even though God had to know what a pervert the man is.

(Link): He’s a Superstar Pastor. She Worked for Him and Says He Groped Her Repeatedly.

Excerpts:

Bill Hybels built an iconic evangelical church outside Chicago. A former assistant says that in the 1980s, he sexually harassed her.

SOUTH BARRINGTON, Ill. — After the pain of watching her marriage fall apart, Pat Baranowski felt that God was suddenly showering her with blessings.

She had a new job at her Chicago-area megachurch, led by a dynamic young pastor named the Rev. Bill Hybels, who in the 1980s was becoming one of the most influential evangelical leaders in the country.

Continue reading “Mega Church Preacher Bill Hybels in Trouble Again For More Sexual Harassment”

‘Bachelorette’ Star Shamed For His Virginity Defends Himself

‘Bachelorette’ Star Shamed For His Virginity Defends Himself

Yeah, see, both secular and (Link): Christian culture mocks, de-values, and shames virginity, celibacy, as well as virgin and celibate people.

So, when I see some Christians or (Link): secular feminists rattling on and on about how society supposedly “slut shames” all women for their sexual behavior, I’m not so sure.

Society has even become a tad more tolerant towards asexual adults.

But God help you if you’re an adult who has voluntarily chosen to sexually abstain for whatever the reason, then both secular and Christian culture will mock you, question you, suspect there’s something weird or freaky or repressed about you.

And, people who do sexually abstain are expected to tolerate and accept any and all sexual behavior by others – we’re supposed to be non-judgmental about people who have a lot of casual sex, or who engage in homosexual behavior, or what have you. But no such tolerance is shown to adult virgins or celibates.

This guy should not be shamed for being a virgin.

He should not have to “defend” himself over this.

All you people out there who may be mocking or insulting this guy for his sexuality status can go get bent.

(Link): ‘Bachelorette’ Star Shamed For His Virginity Defends Himself

Colton Underwood, a 26-year-old retired NFL player and ex-boyfriend of Olympian Aly Raisman, has been in the spotlight on the most recent season of the Bachelorette for being the one out-and-proud virgin on the show, and has gotten quite a bit of flack for it.

During Monday night’s “Men tell All” episode, some of the other guys had some particularly nasty comments regarding Underwood’s virginity.

Continue reading “‘Bachelorette’ Star Shamed For His Virginity Defends Himself”

Health Officials Are Reminding People That Condoms Are Not Resusable

Health Officials Are Reminding People That Condoms Are Not Resusable

People actually have to be taught this? It should be self-evident.

(Link): Health Officials Are Reminding People That Condoms Are Not Resusable

Excerpts:

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention tweeted on its sexually transmitted disease site that condoms are for single use. Officials say they needed to tweet the message because people are washing or reusing condoms instead of throwing them away.