Married South Dakota Couple Die of Cancer Hours Apart on the Same Day – Marriage Doesn’t Guarantee Happiness, Great Health

Married South Dakota Couple Die of Cancer Hours Apart on the Same Day – Marriage Doesn’t Guarantee Happiness, Great Health

Such real life stories blow the lid off conservative marriage and nuclear family propaganda. I’m a conservative myself, and I am not against marriage or the nuclear family, but so many other conservatives have elevated marriage, parenthood, and the nuclear family to such an absurd degree that they’ve deified it.

Studies have shown that marriage does not make people healthier or happier, but I’ve seen some conservatives, including Christian ones, such as Al Mohler, gleefully (gleefully!) share inaccurate studies that claim to show that single adults are unhappy, miserable, and die younger.

Imagine how perverse and deep into pro-marriage and pro-nuclear family propaganda and idolization you have to be to TAKE DELIGHT in studies that (falsely) purport to show that single adults are unhappy or die younger.

Look at the married couple in the example here – being married (and they had children too) didn’t guarantee them a super long life and never-ending bliss. They’re both dead of cancer in their 50s.

(Link): South Dakota EMS worker, 58, and his ‘soulmate’ wife, 52, both die of different forms of cancer just 10 hours apart – two days before Christmas – leaving their three children devastated

Dec 27, 2022
by Keith Griffith

A married couple in their 50s from South Dakota both died of cancer within 10 hours, two days before Christmas, leaving their three children distraught.

Steve Hawkins, 58, and Wendy Hawkins, 52, died from different types of cancer in the same hospital in Yankton on Friday, family members said.

Steve had been battling the disease for five years, while Wendy died after a shorter illness, according to a statement confirming the deaths from the Yankton County EMS, which Steve had overseen since 2009. It remains unclear what type of cancer each of them had.

A Husband and Father Died on Thanksgiving After Flames Burst Over His Body When Hospital Staff Used Defibrillator Paddles – Wife Relied on Dead Husband’s Social Security

A Husband and Father Died on Thanksgiving After Flames Burst Over His Body When Hospital Staff Used Defibrillator Paddles   – Wife Relied on Dead Husband’s Social Security

 Being married and a father didn’t save this guy.

His wife is now alone again. Marriage didn’t ultimately make her happy or protect her from loss and stress.

Also, Complementarian Christians and anti-Feminist conservatives are in error to brainwash women into thinking they can or should always count on a husband to rescue them, pay their way, etc, because what happens if that married woman doesn’t have a career of her own, no savings, and her husband dies, and she was relying on his income or social security (as was the case here)?

I am a conservative, I’ve never been a feminist, but, I also do not buy into the usual sexist, backwards propaganda other conservatives push on to women about marriage and motherhood, either.

Other conservatives think the way to ‘own the libs’ on these issues is to stupidly go in the 180 degree (opposite) direction of neo-marxist, anti-motherhood feminist, and progressive views,
and then “double down” even more on marriage, natalism, and motherhood.

They’re actually creating more problems than they’re solving with that approach, but that is their comfort zone, and they seem determined to stick to it.

This woman, if she had a career of her own and savings, might not have fallen into this situation.
And Christian Patriarchists and Complementarians actually double down on this faulty approach of advising or pressuring women to be nothing but stay at home wives and mothers, leaving them with possibly no fall-back income by which to pay their bills, if their husband dies or leaves them.
It’s very unwise advice or an unwise way to approach life.

(Link): A Tennessee husband and father died on Thanksgiving after flames burst over his body when hospital staff used defibrillator paddles

by Katie Balevic
Sat, December 3, 2022

• • A Tennessee man died after he caught on fire while hospital staff used a defibrillator on him.
  • The man’s wife was in the room when her husband caught ablaze, telling WKRN that “it just blew up.”
  • The hospital system said they are reviewing the “functionality of equipment” following the incident.

A father died in Tennessee on Thanksgiving day after he caught on fire as hospital staff attempted to use a defibrillator on him.

Bobby Ray Stark was bedridden for seven years and relied on his wife of 35 years, Kathy Stark, for care, according to WKRN. He went to the hospital for a foot infection and bed sores last month was later transferred to TriStar Centennial, where he coded and staff tried to revive him with a defibrillator, Kathy told the outlet.

“Then they started the paddles, and it just blew up, everything,” Kathy told WKRN. “I saw that, and I just burst out.”

Kathy told the outlet that she watched the flames cover her husband’s body.

37 Year Old Man Dies Within Hours After Marrying

37 Year Old Man Dies Within Hours After Marrying

Sorry that this guy has died – but for the purposes of my blog, this is kind of illuminating or amusing – NOT that it’s amusing that he’s dead, mind you (truly, sorry he’s passed away) –  but that it so acutely points out the problem with the “marriage will make you happier, safer, and more healthy in life” propaganda my fellow conservatives are always peddling.

Obviously, being married didn’t make this guy any happier or more secure, and it didn’t magically improve his health – he’s deceased now.

Getting married is NOT a fairy tale guarantee that it will give you a “happily ever after” ending.

I have more news stories on my blog that are similar – news reports of other people who were killed moments before, during, or after their wedding. You can see some of those similar stories at the bottom of this post, under “Related.”

(Link): Oklahoma singer-songwriter Jake Flint died in his sleep just hours after celebrating his marriage to his wife Brenda. His cause of death remains unknown.

Oklahoma singer-songwriter Jake Flint died in his sleep Sunday, just hours after celebrating his marriage to his wife Brenda.

The 37-year-old’s sudden death shook the state’s music scene with tributes pouring out to honor the fallen country singer.

His wife took to Facebook early Monday to post a video from their wedding with the caption, “I don’t understand.”

(Link): Country singer Jake Flint, 37, dies in his sleep just HOURS after his wedding

Nov 29, 2022

Oklahoma singer-songwriter Jake Flint died in his sleep hours after his wedding, leaving his new bride heartbroken.

Jake, 37, and Brenda were exchanging wedding vows at a remote homestead between Claremore and Owasso near Tulsa on Saturday night. Hours later the groom died in his sleep, The Oklahoman reported.  The cause of death has not yet been determined.

Divorcee Learns to Enjoy Life Again After 35 Year Marriage Ends by J. Ivey

Divorcee Learns to Enjoy Life Again After 35 Year Marriage Ends by J. Ivey

I could not find a copy of this online, so I cannot link to it. I have a print copy.

Someone did upload a copy to Scribd, but you have to have a subscription or whatever to read past the first few paragraphs

Girlfriend Power

Excerpts:

February / March 2022

It was the first Valentine’s Day after my marriage ended. The last thing I wanted to do was go to a party with a bunch of single ladies

Girlfriend Power by Jennie Ivey

[The author opens the piece by explaining that she and her husband George were divorcing after 35 years of marriage.]

… For the first time in decades, I wasn’t part of a couple. For the first time in my life, I was living alone.

… Why oh why had I said I’d go to my friend Pat’s Valentine’s party? “Celebrate with other singles at a girls’ night in,” the invitation read. “Food! Music! Games! Fun!”

[Initially, she called her friend who was throwing the party to decline. The friend told her the reason for the party started years before, when her husband served her divorce papers on Valentine’s Day, and her father died on Valentine’s Day a few years prior. The friend replied,]

… “instead of moping around because we’re not coupled up, we get together to have a good time.” She wouldn’t take no for an answer.

“And one more thing, Jennie – you have to wear pink or red. It’s a Valentine’s party rule!”

[She mentions that her ex husband George was a surgeon, and while he wasn’t the greatest husband, he did okay on Valentine’s – he’d bring her flowers or candy in heart shaped boxes and so on]

Before I left for Pat’s I said a quick prayer. I hadn’t done a whole lot of praying since the breakup of my marriage. Sometimes I felt mad at God. Furious even.

Did he care that I was suddenly single at 60, an age when most couples were looking forward to retirement and spending time with their kids and grandkids together?

My prayer that evening was short and to the point: God, please show me how to be single.

Dear Abby: I’m Happy Now That My Abusive Ex is Dead

Dear Abby: I’m Happy Now That My Abusive Ex is Dead

 This is not the first time I’ve come across this sort of thing. I have another blog post or two from the past several years detailing letters by widowed women who say their dead husband was abusive or a big jerk, and they are thrilled the husband is dead.

(Link): Dear Abby: I’m Happy Now That My Abusive Ex is Dead

DEAR ABBY:
I have been a widow for six months.

My late husband was a physically and verbally abusive alcoholic.

I spent numerous nights in the ER waiting to be seen and nursed many black eyes throughout the years.

During all those years of abuse, which was witnessed by numerous friends and family, I remained faithful and dedicated to him and our marriage, but due to the toxicity of our relationship I was severely depressed and needed antidepressants.

I tried many times to get him help and had family interventions, only to end up being threatened with getting all my teeth knocked out.

Single by Choice: Why I Am Content to Be Without a Plus-One by M. Weldon

Single by Choice: Why I Am Content to Be Without a Plus-One by M. Weldon

(Link): Single by Choice: Why I Am Content to Be Without a Plus-One

Excerpts:

And, no, I don’t have an affliction in need of a cure.

By Michele Weldon
October 17, 2022

…Married for nine years (we were together for 12) from the mid-’80s to the mid-’90s and divorced for the past 26 years, I have been in one serious, nearly seven-year relationship since my divorce. It was a mostly calm alliance that he ended with his declaration that he never was number one in my life, and needed to be.

…Proposing a rebuttal to Three Dog Night’s 1969 cover of “One Is the Loneliest Number,” I suggest that for many women 50 and older, being single is not just a holding pattern until the next best person comes along.

In her latest book, Not Too Old for That: How Women Are Changing the Story of Aging (2022), award-winning journalist and author Vicki Larson writes, “What if being self-partnered is nothing to fear, but something actually to celebrate?”

UK Court Says Widower Can Use Late Wife’s Frozen Embryo for Surrogate

UK Court Says Widower Can Use Late Wife’s Frozen Embryo for Surrogate

(Link): Widower wins right to have baby using embryo created with his late wife

Landmark ruling allows Ted Jennings, 38, to use embryo to have child via a surrogate

(Link): Widower, 38, fights for the right to have a baby with embryo he created during IVF with wife after she died of a ruptured uterus while pregnant at the age of 40

May 5, 2022

An investment manager is fighting for the right to have a baby using the last remaining embryo he created with his late wife, after they spent a years desperately trying to have children.

Widower Ted Jennings, 38, of Highbury, north London, used his sperm to create multiple embryos with Fern-Marie Choya during several rounds of IVF treatments between 2013 and 2018.

He has now asked Mrs Justice Theis at the High Court to rule that it would be lawful for him to place the last embryo – which was created in 2018 and has been stored –  ‘in treatment with a surrogate mother’.

But lawyers representing the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority said Mr Jennings’ application should be dismissed.

They argued that it would not be lawful to use the embryo because Mr Jennings’ accountant wife, who died in 2019, had not provided written consent.

(Link): UK court says widower can use late wife’s frozen embryo for surrogate

Ted Jennings said his wife previously agreed upon using their embryos if she were to pass

June 23, 2022
By Haley Chi-Sing

A U.K. High Court judge ruled in favor of a man requesting to use his late wife’s frozen embryo with a surrogate on Wednesday.

Ted Jennings, 38, had submitted his application to the High Court after his wife, Fern-Marie Choya, died suddenly in 2019 while pregnant with twins and did not give written consent as to how her embryos could be used following her untimely death.

The couple had previously engaged in fertility treatments, according to The Guardian. Choya later became pregnant with twins and died suddenly 18 weeks into her pregnancy after experiencing complications.

Con Artists Scammed Widow Woman Out of $800,000 by Pretending to Be Leonardo DiCaprio and Claiming He Was Enslaved by the Church of Scientology

Con Artists Scammed Widow Woman Out of $800,000 by Pretending to Be Leonardo DiCaprio and Claiming He Was Enslaved by the Church of Scientology

A few months ago, con artists were using Keanu Reeves to con women, now it’s Leonardo DiCaprio.

(Link): Con artists pretending to be Leonardo DiCaprio enslaved by Scientology scam widow out of $800K

May 12, 2022

A Texas woman says she’s lost over $800,000 to scammers attempting to extract money from her to ‘save’ actor Leonardo DiCaprio from the Church of Scientology.

The woman, 54, told The Daily Beast she was first contacted by what she thought was the Oscar-winning actor and activist via Twitter, which she was new to in around 2018.

Newlywed Bride Killed in Gold Buggy Accident on Holiday with Husband

Newlywed Bride Killed in Gold Buggy Accident on Holiday with Husband

I periodically like to post these news stories about grooms or brides who die on the same day (or shortly after) their wedding day, because it goes to show you that even if you do marry, that’s not a guarantee it will last.

(Link): Newlywed bride killed in golf buggy accident on holiday with husband

by Jon Rogers
June 21, 2022

A NEWLYWED bride has died on her honeymoon in a horror golf buggy accident.

Marina Morgan, 29, and her new husband Robbie were on a dream holiday when their buggy overturned while trying to do a U-turn on June 20.

Mr Morgan, who was driving, was uninjured but his new wife died at the scene.

The accident took place on Whitsunday Boulevard at the northern end of Hamilton Island, Queensland, Australia.

Another Misleading Christian Propaganda Piece About Marriage: ‘She Was Widowed With 3 Kids At 25 But God Had Plans For Her And A Widower To Find Love Again’

Another Misleading Christian Propaganda Piece About Marriage: ‘She Was Widowed With 3 Kids At 25 But God Had Plans For Her And A Widower To Find Love Again’

If this married couple is happy, I’m happy for them.

My problem is not with the couple particularly (well, maybe a little bit, but more on that way below), but my primary concern is that Christian outlets keep carrying these stories, stories which can be very misleading to single, Christian adults who read them and wonder,
“Why did God bless these two in this story with a spouse, but God never sent me a spouse? Where is the spouse I spent years praying for and trusting in God for?”

There are a lot of Christian women out there who wanted to be married, but it never happened for them, including devout Christian women who followed all the evangelical, Baptist, or otherwise Christian, rules they were taught to follow when younger on how to get married.

A devout Christian single who desires marriage can live a godly life, devoted to Jesus, and follow all the “how to get married” books and magazine articles by Christians – but still never get married. Such a person can find him or herself single into his or her 30s, 40s, 50s, or older.

I don’t see too many Christians or publications admit to that possibility and reality – and it’s not just me. In my years of blogging here, I’ve seen many other single, Christian women (and some men) say they are in the same situation, and not just online but on occasionally on Christian television shows that take viewer questions for advice.

I have a lot more to say below this link and excerpts, so please keep reading and scrolling:

(Link): She Was Widowed With 3 Kids At 25 But God Had Plans For Her And A Widower To Find Love Again

Excerpts:

By Mel Johnson On June 23, 2022

Brittany and Daniel Brooker were both widowed at young ages and both had small children to raise. But God led them through their grief to one day find love again as the Brooker Bunch!

At weddings, a couple vows to love one another for “as long as they both shall live.” And most of us assume that life will span multiple decades.

Sadly, though, that’s not always the case. Sometimes lives are cut short. And that was the case for the first marriages of Brittany and Daniel Brooker.

‘Wonder Woman’ Star Lynda Carter Honors ‘Vibrant’ Robert A. Altman After Losing Spouse of 37 Years

‘Wonder Woman’ Star Lynda Carter Honors ‘Vibrant’ Robert A. Altman After Losing Spouse of 37 Years

This goes to show that even if you marry, your spouse can die – of old age, a medical problem, in a car accident, what have you – which will leave you single again.

(Link): ‘Wonder Woman’ Star Lynda Carter Honors ‘Vibrant’ Robert A. Altman After Losing Spouse of 37 Years

The gaming CEO passed away in February 2021 at age 73

April 25, 2022
By Stephanie Nolasco | Fox News

Lynda Carter is determined to keep the legacy of her late husband Robert A. Altman alive.

The “Wonder Woman” star attended the TGen awards, an affiliate of City of Hope, where she was given the John S. McCain Leadership Award for her advocacy of research and clinical advances.

The 70-year-old took to Instagram on Monday and shared her spouse of 37 years passed away from a rare type of cancer that impacts the body’s normal production of blood cells.

Being Bitter and Blaming Others Can Ruin Your Health by Elizabeth Cohen

Being Bitter and Blaming Others Can Ruin Your Health by Elizabeth Cohen

(Link): Being Bitter and Blaming Others Can Ruin Your Health

Excerpts:

August 2011
By Elizabeth Cohen, Senior Medical Correspondent

…Feeling persistently resentful toward other people — the boss who fired you, the spouse who cheated on you — can indeed affect your physical health, according to a new book, “Embitterment: Societal, psychological, and clinical perspectives.”

In fact, the negative power of feeling bitter is so strong that the authors call for the creation of a new diagnosis called PTED, or post-traumatic embitterment disorder, to describe people who can’t forgive others’ transgressions against them.

“Bitterness is a nasty solvent that erodes every good thing,” says Dr. Charles Raison, associate professor of psychiatry at Emory University School of Medicine and CNNHealth’s Mental Health expert doctor.

What bitterness does to your body

Feeling bitter interferes with the body’s hormonal and immune systems, according to Carsten Wrosch, an associate professor of psychology at Concordia University in Montreal and an author of a chapter in the new book.

Studies have shown that bitter, angry people have higher blood pressure and heart rate and are more likely to die of heart disease and other illnesses.