Spain Is Outraged Because a 68-Year-Old TV Star Had a Surrogate Baby With Son’s Sperm – Also: Woman Has Sperm Extracted from Dead Fiance To Make a Baby

Spain Is Outraged Because a 68-Year-Old TV Star Had a Surrogate Baby With Son’s Sperm – Also: Woman Has Sperm Extracted from Dead Fiance To Make a Baby

These news stories seem rather weird and creepy .

Other than that, I’m not quite sure what to make of this, except to say I find conservative pearl clutching about it hypocritical, since my fellow conservatives are forever pressuring women to marry and make babies – you’d think they’d be THRILLED that these women want to bring another baby into the world, even if the fathers of the infants are dead.

You cannot win with some conservatives – if you stay single and celibate (hence, no pregnancies for you), or you are single, sexually active but use birth control, they get upset and angry with you, and they bleat on about you supposedly being selfish or complain about falling birth rates.

But if you do have a baby – while single, or via your dead son’s or dead fiance’s sperm – they don’t like that, either.

(Link): Spanish actress uses dead son’s sperm to conceive baby, works around Spain’s surrogacy ban

(Link): Socialite reveals her surrogate baby is actually her dead son’s

Ana Obregón, 68, says she could have as many as ‘five children’ using her deceased son’s sperm as this was his ‘last wish’

(Link): Fiancée Of Slain Reporter Plans To Create Fatherless Baby Using Sperm Harvested Hours After His Death – via The Federalist

Excerpt:

If Casey Fite conceives a child with the sperm she had harvested from her deceased fiance, she will be knowingly welcoming a child into fatherlessness.

by Jordan Boyd, March 9, 2023

The fiancée of slain Florida TV reporter Dylan Lyons hired someone to harvest his sperm hours after his death and plans to use it to manufacture a child in a lab.

The same day a rogue gunman shot and killed her 24-year-old future spouse while he was on the job, the grieving Casey Fite, along with Lyons’ mother, Beth Lyons, began researching how she could posthumously extract his biological matter and have his baby.

Conservative Motherhood Idolaters Once Again Upset Over People Finding Mother’s Day Painful, Re: Companies Allowing People to Opt Out of Mother’s Day Ads Has Them Incensed

Conservative Motherhood Idolaters Once Again Upset Over People Finding Mother’s Day Painful, Re: Companies Allowing People to Opt Out of Mother’s Day Ads Has Them Incensed

Let me get the usual out of the way:
I am a conservative.
I am not feminist.
I am not anti-motherhood. I do not support abortion.
I am not progressive, liberal, nor a Democrat, and I am fed up and sick and tired of seeing Rainbow Flags plastered all over social media by corporations during “Pride Month,”
and I am tired of companies hiring men such as Dylan Mulvaney who say they’re girls to advertise Tampons and Sports Bras.

Having said all that, I do believe that my fellow conservatives have gone down the 180 degree opposite wrong route from anti-motherhood, anti-Nuclear Family positions that neo-Marxist progressives hold to the degree they have turned motherhood (as well as natalism, the nuclear family, parenthood, marriage) into Idols, which goes against the Bible,
and they shame and insult anyone, but especially any woman, over the age of 30 who has never married, can’t marry, doesn’t want to, or doesn’t have kids, doesn’t want to have kids.

Companies presenting the public with the chance to not have to view Mother’s Day ads is not necessarily woke, Marxist, or progressive, and it’s not inherently “anti family” or “anti motherhood.” Stop conflating or confusing those issues, if you’ve been doing so.

Conservative Upset Over Companies Allowing Mother’s Day Marketing Opt Outs

About three or four days ago, I saw a well known Twitter conservative, Jack Posobiec, tweet about how some companies this year began letting others opt out of receiving Mother’s Day ads, and I saw another conservative also tweet out an alarm about this.

I saw another lady tweet about it, and I commented under her tweet. After that some lady (maybe a man?) named “Rae” started sending me rude tweets.

Before I get to those tweets – I will link to a few, maybe embed a few, I wanted to make the following observations.

I am not opposed to Mother’s Day or to Motherhood.

I am not demanding that anyone “cancel” Mother’s Day.

I am not asking or demanding that the general public each NOT honor their own mothers or give their Mom a Mother’s Day card, or take their Mom out for brunch for the day, if they wish.

That companies are allowing people to opt out of Mother’s Day marketing doesn’t bother me in the least.

I don’t see it as an “anti family” attack. To me, it’s not the same thing as a company plastering Rainbows all over their ads.

There are actually some people – including conservatives – who find Mother’s Day a painful holiday to endure, and they’d rather avoid as many Mother’s Day ads as they can; that is their personal choice, and that is okay.

If you’re a conservative who adores Mother’s Day and you choose to keep accepting Mother’s Day ads in YOUR in-box, I am fine with that. I am not telling you to skip the Mother’s Day ads if you enjoy them.

Why Some May Find Mother’s Day Disturbing or Painful

The reason some may want to avoid Mother’s Day advertisements is that they find Mother’s Day painful, because it reminds them that their mother died months or years ago (they’re still in the grieving process), their Mom is or was abusive to them, or, they are infertile, want to have a baby but cannot, due to physical health problems.

None of those reasons for not wanting to see Mother’s Day commercials or advertisements derives from a place of “devaluing” motherhood or hating motherhood – but even if it did, so what?

If you’re a mother, and you demand that others validate YOUR life choice to have children, you are in error.

If you had children to receive attention, pity, or validation from your family, your church, or the culture, you had children for all the wrong reasons.

Pride Month Marketing

Just as companies give people a choice to opt out of Mother’s Day ads, they should also do so concerning Father’s Day ads and LGBTQ and Pride Month ads.

Other conservatives keep bringing up Pride Month ads as a comparison, but I believe it’s an Apples Vs. Oranges situation.

If companies did give the public a choice to opt out of LGBTQ marketing, some of the far left progressives may be offended, but based on the average, conservative or libertarian LGB persons I follow on social media, most of them would be okay with that and would even opt out of the Pride Month ads too.

Where-as some people find Mother’s Day painful because perhaps they are infertile, their Mother is abusive, or their Mom died two years ago and they’re still grieving, I don’t think the same types of emotions are attached to Pride Month.

I don’t think too many gays are going to be completely upset to see Pride Month ads or not see them, or are as apt to become infuriated if a company gives users an opportunity to avoid them. It’s a month long holiday about sexual orientation, which as compared to death of a loved one (a mother), isn’t the same thing, and is no where near the same thing.

I mention that last point because so many motherhood idolizers keep screaming on Twitter about how companies keep cramming “Pride Month” down everyone’s throats.

And yes, they do.

Woke companies are annoying like that, and I too wish they’d stop.

I’m a hetero conservative, but as I am someone who is opposed to progressive transgenderism, I follow a lot of lesbians and homosexuals on twitter, because they are opposed to leftist trans activism, and some of them have said THEY too are sick and tired of “Pride Month” and all the rainbow flags everywhere.

Some of these LGB persons are liberal, conservative, or libertarian.

But woke companies cramming Pride Month marketing down everyone’s throats doesn’t change the fact that some people still find Mother’s Day, or Father’s Day, painful and do not want to see reminders of either one.

Churches and Mother’s Day

On the matter of churches, that is a little bit more tricky for me.

Back when I was a regular, and later, a semi-regular, church attender, I would choose to stay home around Mother’s Day, because sadly, too many churches celebrate Mother’s Day during Sunday morning services, making the audience in the pews a captive audience.

There are people in the pews who find the holiday a painful reminder that they’re infertile, or all their pregnancies have resulted in miscarriage, or their mother is dead, or their mother was abusive. I understand why they may not want to be subjected to Mother’s Day sermons or Mother’s Day ads.

Virginia Woman Convicted of Killing Two Young Daughters in Twisted Revenge Plot on Ex-Husband

Virginia Woman Convicted of Killing Two Young Daughters in Twisted Revenge Plot on Ex-Husband

To counter-act some of the usual talking points I heard from fellow conservatives as I grew up, and that I still hear now from them:

Does marriage or parenthood make a person more godly, responsible, ethical, or loving? Nope. Did this woman have to achieve some level of perfection or loving-kindness before God granted her a spouse? Apparently not.

(Link): Va. Mom Murdered Her 2 Daughters, Then Called Their Father to Tell Him What She’d Done

Veronica Youngblood allegedly gave her daughters sleeping pill gummies before she shot them

March 23, 2023

.. Prosecutors argued that Youngblood murdered her children to get back at her ex-husband who was allegedly scheduled to move out of the state with Brooklynn, the Post reported.

(Link): Virginia Mother Found Guilty of Killing Her Two Daughters

Excerpts:

March 22, 2023

A Virginia woman was found guilty of murder in the 2018 shootings of her two daughters.

Prosecutors said Veronica Youngblood shot 5-year-old Brooklynn and 15-year-old Sharon in their McLean apartment just days before Brooklynn was supposed to move to live with her father.

…“She said her mom came into the room and said, ‘I’m gonna take you to see God,’ and then shot her,” the officer testified.

Youngblood was arrested after calling her ex-husband and leaving him a voicemail confessing and telling him she hated him.

(Link): Virginia woman convicted of killing 2 young daughters in twisted revenge plot on ex-husband

March 26, 2023
By Steve Janoski

A Virginia woman has been found guilty of murdering her two young daughters in what prosecutors said was a twisted attempt to get revenge on her ex-husband, who planned to move away with one of the girls.

Veronica Youngblood, 37, had admitted that she killed her kids, 15-year-old Sharon Castro and 5-year-old Brooklynn Youngblood — but she pleaded not guilty by reason of insanity to the Aug. 5, 2018 murders, according to the Washington Post.

However, the jury was not convinced that mental illness was a major factor in the slayings.

U.S. Maternal Death Rate Rose Sharply in 2021, CDC Data Shows, and Experts Worry that Problem is Getting Worse

U.S. Maternal Death Rate Rose Sharply in 2021, CDC Data Shows, and Experts Worry that Problem is Getting Worse

Since I’ve been running this blog, for over a decade now, it seems that about once every few years, a new study comes out saying that maternal deaths are on the rise in the USA.

I would like to remind the reader that I am not against people having babies, if that is their honest to goodness desire in life, and I’m not pro-choice regarding abortion, but – in light of the fact that a woman can still lose her life due to pregnancy is a pretty sobering fact, and while the left needs to stop pushing abortion, the right needs to stop shaming or pressuring women to have children.

Unless I am mis-reading the infographics included with some of the articles below, Hispanics have lower maternal death rates than Whites, yet all the news reports I’ve seen so far keep contrasting this as “Black Women Vs. White Women.”

(Link): COVID Worsened a Health Crisis Among Pregnant Women

Excerpts:

March 16, 2023
by Roni Caryn Rabin

…The National Center for Health Statistics reported Thursday that 1,205 pregnant women died in 2021, representing a 40% increase in maternal deaths compared with 2020, when there were 861 deaths, and a 60% increase compared with 2019, when there were 754.

The count includes deaths of women who were pregnant or had been pregnant within the last 42 days, from any cause related to or aggravated by the pregnancy. A separate report by the Government Accountability Office has cited COVID as a contributing factor in at least 400 maternal deaths in 2021, accounting for much of the increase.

Even before the pandemic, the United States had the highest maternal mortality rate of any industrialized nation. The coronavirus worsened an already dire situation, pushing the rate to 32.9 per 100,000 births in 2021 from 20.1 per 100,000 live births in 2019.

Judge Orders Man to Pay Ex-Wife Over $200K for 25 Years of Housework – Doesn’t Jibe With Sexist Complementarian or Trad Wife Propaganda

Judge Orders Man to Pay Ex-Wife Over $200K for 25 Years of Housework – Doesn’t Jibe With Sexist Complementarian or Trad Wife Propaganda

The sub-heading of the news article below is

“Ex-wife claimed her dedication to housework left her without career prospects”

I am not anti-marriage. I am not opposed to women who, if they understand what they’re getting into, decide of their own accord to marry and be a housewife (however, I do not respect this choice if it’s done primarily or only because of church teachings, societal expectations, or family pressure).

If you are a woman, and you know in your heart of hearts that one of your big dreams or goals in life is to marry and be a housewife, then go for it! But it has to be YOUR freely chosen goal or dream, not that of your church, your parents, or your culture.

I do oppose the rigid, sexist societal, family, and religious views that tell women that their only or highest purpose in life is to marry and get pregnant.

I oppose the flip side of this rhetoric, where a society, family, or religion (or cultural, conservative commentators) shame, mock, or criticize women for not marrying or for not having children (for whatever reasons).

Too often, I’ve seen moderate to higher level complementarians argue that women should not get college degrees, and/or should not get a paying job or career.

There’s also been a new-ish trend the last year or two called “Trad Wife,” that seems mostly composed of secular women who want to live out a 1950s, June Cleaver housewife lifestyle (I may be doing a post about this later).

Super hard core wacko patriarchist Lori Alexander, of The Transformed Wife, even goes so far as to say (if I remember correctly) that single women shouldn’t get a job outside of the home and just “trust the Lord to provide.”

(Side note: that is the same advice given to Christian single women: just trust the Lord to send you a husband! Yeah, well, I did a lot of trusting in the Lord, I also tried dating sites and church single classes, and I’m still single, so that advice is bogus.)

Anyway. I have another news story on this blog of a married woman who was jobless, and she was depending on her husband’s disability (or social security? I forget which) payments, but he died in a hospital when his body bursts into flames… so now, this woman, with no job, no income, and a dead husband, has no financial means.

It’s not a wise life choice for a woman to skip college (or a trade school of some kind) and to depend wholly on a husband for financial support, when he may divorce her, she may have to divorce him, or he may die from a heart attack, car accident, or from another factor.

(Link): Court Orders Woman’s Ex-Husband to Pay Her $215K for 25 Years of Housework During Their Marriage

Ivana Moral of Spain will be paid by her former husband, who owns a flourishing gym business, according to multiple reports

(Link): Judge orders man to pay ex-wife over $200K for 25 years of housework

Ex-wife claimed her dedication to housework left her without career prospects

March 12, 2023
by Michael Lee

A Spanish judge ordered a man to pay his ex-wife $215,000 for 25 years of housework that she “exclusively” handled while they were a couple.

Ivana Moral won the judgment after arguing she was burdened by chores for the couple during their 25 years of marriage, according to a report from WSB, citing the Spanish language newspaper El Pais.

Bizarre: Women Who Are Genuinely Fine With Being Single or Childless and Who Publicly Admit It Deeply Disturb or Infuriate Sexist Incel Types and My Fellow Conservatives, Who Want Such Women to Harbor a Victim Mindset

Bizarre: Women Who Are Genuinely Fine With Being Single or Childless and Who Publicly Admit It Deeply Disturb or Infuriate Sexist Incel Types and My Fellow Conservatives, Who Want Such Women to Harbor a Victim Mindset

I have been a conservative person my entire life. I am not liberal, woke, or progressive.

I am not opposed to marriage, motherhood, the nuclear family, or parenthood. I do not support abortion on demand.

For years now, I have noticed the oddest, most disgusting behavior from other conservatives: many of them become unhinged, unsettled, or very angry about women who are truly happy with being single or childless or childfree. It didn’t cross my mind to blog about this observation until now.

The cherry on top of Conservative Outrage on this topic is that the fury seems to be particularly directed at single, childless women who mention on social media or in televised interviews that they’re enjoying life single and childless.

That is, from the angry conservative pro-family types, if you are single, childless (or childfree) and happy about it as a woman, you damn well just better keep it to yourself.

These pro-family conservatives, many of whom even profess to be Christian, further sometimes say things to or about those childless women and tell them personally on social media, how miserable they must be.

They chortle things at them things like, “You will die alone in a house full of cats,” and they say this as though they are filled with glee and happy at the thought of childless women dying alone and unhappy. How perverse.

Some of them, like Catholic Matt Walsh, even like to get ageist, and toss in comments about age at these women, saying to them, “You’re nearing 40…” or, “You’re almost 50….” (See (Link): example Tweet of his here.)

Ditto regarding “incels” or other types of men who are deeply sexist and ageist towards women. They too get very agitated and unglued if a woman publicly admits to being okay, content, or happy with being single or childless.

It’s as though these groups need and desperately want to believe that women who are and remain single or childless (or childfree) are lonely, bitter, miserable, and unhappy, or will become so in the future – and they need to believe that such women are deeply unhappy precisely because those women are single, childless, or childfree.

In the reverse situation, every once in awhile a woman celebrity may publicly say she’s sad that she was never able to have children – and what do the sexist conservatives and d-bag incels do, but immediately take screen captures of the comments, share them all over social media, as if to say,

“See? See?! Feminism has made women miserable. All women obviously want to marry and have babies! They are depressed if they don’t marry and have children, see, see, see!!!
“Women are unable to enjoy life or find contentment if they never marry or never have children, here is your proof, right here, this lady movie star saying she is lonely at 62 and regrets she never had children!!!!”

I’ve never been a feminist, but may I add: if some women are unhappy being childless or single, it may be in part precisely because conservatives and churches are constantly brainwashing women to think their only purpose in life, and their only road to happiness, resides in marrying and becoming pregnant.

If a woman grows up in a family, societal, or religious context that conditions her to think that she can be happy and have meaning only if she marries or has children, well, duh, don’t be surprised if yes, some women may get to adulthood and feel a little down that they’re not married or don’t have kids.

But that would be a result, in part, due to conservative, traditional, old school “family values” brainwashing. That would not be due to “feminism,” of all things

It’s as though many conservatives and sexist lunatics want single and childless women to be unhappy. It’s utterly bizarre to me.

Before I go on further, here is a pertinent article from the WSJ:

(Link): What’s That Ticking Sound? The Male Biological Clock

Men are also at the mercy of age when it comes to having kids

June 25, 2011
By Jennifer Vanderbes

A man’s age when he has children is turning out to be an important factor in that child’s health, according to WSJ contributor Jennifer Vanderbes. Kelsey Hubbard talks to the author about the role a man’s biological clock plays in a child’s risk for diseases and disorders.

Conservatives and the Double Standard Re: Lonely, Single Hetero Men

By the way, I’ve seen more and more articles the last several years that say more and more hetero men are single, and those hetero men either don’t want to date or marry (they’ve lost interest), or, some of them do want to date or marry women, but they can’t seem to get girlfriends and do not know how to go about getting dates or getting a girl friend.

So, I then began seeing news stories such as these about men who are single, some of whom are lonely:

(Link): Guy So Depressed Over Being Single He Cut Off His Own Penis (article)

(Link): ‘Transmaxxing’: Meet The Online Community Encouraging Gender Transitions For Sexually Frustrated (Incel) Men

(Link): Number of ‘Lonely, Single’ Men is on the Rise as Women with Higher Dating Standards Look for Partners Who are ‘Emotionally Available, Good Communicators, and Share Similar Values’, Says Psychologist

(Link): Dear Abby: I (Older, Single Man) Gave Up Dating Women, and 30 Years Later, I’m Lonely

(Link): Bitter, Frustrated 22 Year Old Male Virgin and Member of Men’s Rights / PUA Groups Kills Several Women Because He Couldn’t Get Dates – what an entitled sexist doof

Funny how I seldom see other conservatives mocking such men as the ones mentioned in those news articles for being single and lonely.

If anything, when these topics and news reports of men “falling behind” in culture are brought up, both conservative men and women rush to the men’s defense, to pity them and portray men in culture as being victims.

Often times, such conservatives who paint men as a group as being victims blame women for the men’s victim status, or else, they blame feminism or feminists, for the failings of men – it is so hypocritical and laughable.

By the way, as a conservative, I’ve also noticed that any time a new study or news story is published about men being single and lonely, that conservatives such as (but not limited to) Tucker Carlson will offer very understanding, compassionate, nuanced examinations about these shifts in culture leaving men out in the cold, and how society has supposedly let men down.

Carlson especially likes to invite on conservative women guest speakers on to his television program on Fox News who back Carlson up on this issue, and these women cluck in worry over those poor, poor, single men who are allegedly being kept down and single by a supposedly “feminized” culture of raving, men-hating feminists.

However, if women are under discussion – let’s say there’s a study or news story about women finding it difficult finding suitable marriage partners to marry, or what have you – those very same conservatives who pity men will revoke deep, thoughtful, compassionate analysis to instead snigger in contempt that, “feminism has made you women miserable, ha ha ha, look how  you’ve traded the bliss of family and marriage to being chained to a corporate desk! Ha ha, it’s so wonderful to see single and childless women suffering!”

The culture-wide problems that men face and the ones that women face are treated completely differently by such conservatives, with pity and empathy (and lots of excuses and justifications) being made for the failings or sadness of men,
while women, on the other hand, get roasted, demonized, mocked, and criticized, often for things and problems that they actually did not bring about, but are blamed for anyhow.

I see this phenomenon come up quite often by Tucker Carlson, Matt Walsh, sometimes Ben Shapiro, Candace Owens, and so on.

The men always get a pass, and always get rationalizations and lots of hugs, kisses, and reassurances, and the men’s failings get blamed on women, or on feminism, while the women, on the other hand, usually (wrongly), get blamed for problems they did not create, and they get ridiculed or criticized, too.

39-Year-Old Woman Goes Viral For Honest Videos On What Her Childfree Life Looks Like

39-Year-Old Woman Goes Viral For Honest Videos On What Her Childfree Life Looks Like

(Link): This Woman Went Viral For Sharing That She Ultimately Had To End A Relationship Because Her Partner Wanted Kids And She Didn’t, And It’s Something That Should Be Talked About More

“People need to stop asking women when they will have kids. Women need to be encouraged to do whatever the hell they want with their lives. Like any stigma, the more we normalize it, the better it will get.”

(Link): 39-Year-Old Woman Goes Viral For Honest Videos On What Her Childfree Life Looks Like

Excerpts:

In recent years, there has been a growing number of women who have been vocal about remaining child-free. The reasons behind their choice vary, but common ones are concerns about financial stability, the desire to focus on personal interests and careers, and broader things like overpopulation.

39-year-old Vancouver-based photographer and artist Jackie Dives is one of these advocates. In addition to her creative work, Jackie uses social media to break the ice and invites the public to talk about (not) having children.

Photographer Jackie Dives has made a conscious decision not to have kids

To normalize the discussion about this choice, she runs a TikTok vlog series

“I was surprised by how many people have commented that they experienced the same thing,” Jackie explained to BuzzFeed. “I think the root cause of this is that everyone tells women they will change their mind. You might have a strong conviction that you don’t want kids, but if everyone in your life is telling you that you will change your mind or that you will regret not having them, it can be very difficult to walk away from someone you love to stay true to your convictions.”

“People need to stop asking women when they will have kids,” Jackie said. “Women need to be encouraged to do whatever the hell they want with their lives. Like any stigma, the more we normalize it, the better it will get. People need to stop gaslighting women about what they want from their own lives.”

I’m Full of Regret at Ever Having Children Because I Miss My Old Life So Much – Why Didn’t Someone Warn Me Not to Do It?, by E. Coughland

I’m Full of Regret at Ever Having Children Because I Miss My Old Life So Much – Why Didn’t Someone Warn Me Not to Do It?, by E. Coughland

(Link): I’m full of regret at ever having children because I miss my old life so much – why didn’t someone warn me not to do it?

Feb. 1, 2023
by E. Coughland

A mum-of-two has revealed she is ‘full of regret’ at having had children and said she misses her old life.

Taking to the parenting platform Mumsnet, the British woman explained that she missed the ‘freedom and luxury’ of not having to think of everyone else all the time.

She admitted that she didn’t feel that parenting was particularly ‘rewarding’ and if someone had warned her not to have kids she might have listened.

Some people suggested that she was probably depressed, while others said they agreed that having kids was not for everyone.

The mother explained: ‘I’ve got two children who I love and they are sweet children who will (hopefully) grow into lovely people one day, and I adore them 80% of the time when there’s no tantrums etc.

‘But despite loving them, I feel deeply full of regret at ever having children. I miss my “old life” so, so, so much, I miss the freedom of just every single thing that comes without having children.

‘I miss my husband and how we used to be/how our relationship was then. I miss lazy weekends, not having to get up. And the travel I used to do… this is probably the biggest thing.

‘Yes I know I can still do things, and we do. But I mean that I miss the freedom and luxury of not having to think all the details/about everyone else. Everything is so much more of an effort, and I just basically really wish I’d stayed without children.

‘I don’t feel that parenting is particularly ‘rewarding’ even when they do something pretty amazing. It’s cute but I don’t get any joy from it per se.

‘Probably one of the only things in life that you genuinely can’t change once it’s happened.

‘I don’t want people of offer ‘fixes’ on how I can do this or that. I guess I just wanted a safe space to voice my feelings because I can’t really say this out loud in real life.

The Chelsea Handler Childless Woman Upset: Other Conservatives Wrongly Conflating Married Motherhood with Womanhood or Happiness, Meaning, Purpose

The Chelsea Handler Childless Woman Upset: Other Conservatives Wrongly Conflating Married Motherhood with Womanhood or with Happiness, Meaning, or Purpose

After entertainer Chelsea Handler uploaded (Link): a Tweet with a video of herself listing the numerous ways she enjoys life due to being childless – I didn’t see anything in the video mentioning abortion – a lot of other conservatives jumped to shame and scold Handler for being happy about being childless and publicly expressing that happiness.

Others have said that Handler had two or three abortions in the past. The fact that Handler previously had abortions does not change the substance of my problems with conservative reaction to Handler’s video.

I am pro-life, not pro-choice, so I don’t agree with Handler’s actions to terminate her pregnancies.

However, again, I don’t recall Handler’s “happy to be childless” video advocating abortion or mentioning anything about abortion.

I don’t think her video criticized or shamed women for being mothers or for wanting to be mothers.

The only possible, even remotely “anti motherhood” take away one can get from her video is that mothers – assuming they are good, non-abusive mothers – invest a lot of time in child-rearing, but Handler doesn’t frame it in an anti-motherhood way.

It’s Okay For Women to Be Childless at Any Age and to be Happy About Being Childless, Just Like It’s Okay For Mothers to Be Happy About Being Mothers

Handler was just showing ways she has more free time because she doesn’t have to participate in childcare – which is not the same thing as being “anti-motherhood,” or telling other women they are wrong to be mothers.

It’s perfectly fine for a woman to be single and childless and to be happy about it.

Women can and should find meaning and purpose apart from marriage and motherhood. It’s unhealthy for any person to wrap up all their happiness, meaning, or purpose into one identity, station of life, or role.

If you are a married mother, your children will grow up, move out, and seldom visit you once they’re gone. Your husband may develop dementia, abuse you, or cheat on you, so that you will be without emotional support or you will have to divorce him.
In all these situations, you will be left with yourself, by yourself, and god help you if you never forged purpose, identity, happiness, or meaning apart from a spouse and children.

There’s no reason to criticize or shame an adult, man or woman, for being single and childless and for being happy about it and posting about it.

My fellow conservatives often push motherhood (via podcasts, tweets, magazine articles, church sermons, blog posts, etc) to a loopy, creepy, fevered pitch, about how super awesome, fulfilling, and wonderful motherhood supposedly is – but goodness forbid a childless woman lists or publicizes the ways she’s happy with being childless – and do so without criticizing motherhood or mothers. That’s a huge double standard.

I also didn’t agree with Handler’s mockery of single women who choose to remain virgins until marriage or to remain chaste (I blogged about that (Link): here a few years ago).

Unfortunately, in the midst of criticizing Handler, a lot of conservatives today were conflating “womanhood” to married motherhood. 

However, a woman remains a woman regardless if she has a child or is infertile, childless, or childfree, or whether she wants to have children or not.

The Bizarre, Misguided Shaming of Single and Childless or Childfree Women by Pro-Lifer Abby Johnson – (Not All Single, Childless Women are Liberal, Pro-Choice Feminists)

The Bizarre, Misguided Shaming of Single and Childless or Childfree Women by Pro-Lifer Abby Johnson – (Not All Single, Childless Women are Liberal, Pro-Choice Feminists)

When I was on Twitter the other day, someone who I follow on Twitter commented on a Tweet by a lady calling herself Abby Johnson.

A reminder: I sometimes follow people on social media who I don’t fully agree with on all topics. I’m a conservative, but I follow some liberals and progressives, including women who call themselves “radical feminists.” A lot of those radical feminists are pro-choice; they support abortion, I do not.

Like me, most of those radical feminists do not support “sex work” (strip clubs, prostitution, etc), and they do not support transgender activism.

Here is how Abby Johnson is currently describing herself on her Twitter bio (@AbbyJohnson):

Planned Parenthood Director turned Pro-Life Advocate! CEO of @ATTWNministry
. Global Ambassador for @COL1972official
. Best selling author & speaker. Mama/Wife
— end Twitter bio —

I am sincerely glad to hear that Johnson flipped her opinion on abortion, that she went from being pro-choice to pro-life.

Johnson seems a bit familiar. I think I may have seen her interviewed on Christian television program “The 700 Club,” in one of their CBN news segments, or perhaps I saw her on Fox News at some point?

At any rate, I am dismayed by her Twitter feed. Unfortunately, she, like many of my other fellow conservatives, falsely equates motherhood and wifehood with womanhood. I corrected her on that under a few of her other tweets.

(I’m not sure if Johnson is a Christian or not, but from her tweets, I can see that she leans right – as I do – and she also is pro-life, does not support transgenderism. I too am pro-life, and I sure as heck do not support progressive transgenderism, ie, allowing biological men who say they are women into women’s prisons, women’s locker rooms and so forth).

Also like a lot of other conservatives, Johnson holds a lot of false stereotypes about secular, liberal feminists. Not all feminists support trans activism, are anti-men, anti-nuclear family, and so on. There are actually women feminists who are married mothers.

If you’ve followed my blog, you will already know that I am middle-aged, I am single by circumstance (not by choice – not that men or women who choose to be single should be criticized for that, either), I am a conservative, I am anti-progressive trans agenda, and I am pro-life.

I am not opposed to The Nuclear Family, parenthood, and marriage, but I am opposed to the deification of such by other conservatives.

(Yes, most conservatives have unfortunately turned “the family,” motherhood, fatherhood, and marriage into idols, and they frequently love to make negative assumptions about, and insult anyone, who isn’t married or who doesn’t have children).

Let’s look at some of Johnson’s tweets – here’s the first one that I saw the other day, because someone I followed on Twitter commented below it (link to her tweet):

So, what does Johnson do with conservative, pro-life, anti- leftist transgender activism, middle-aged never married women such as myself, who was a devout Christian for decades, who had expected to get married, never met the right guy, remained faithful to biblical sexual ethics – no sex outside of marriage, hence no pregnancies?

Why is Johnson lumping pro-life, conservative, single, childless women, such as myself, into the same group with progressive, pro-choice, pro-progressive- gender- ideology women? Which is what she’s doing, because she’s equating being a woman, and/or a decent, happy woman, with being married and a mother.

Johnson is unnecessarily insulting other pro-life, conservative women who never did marry, who may never marry, and who do not have children, and she’s doing this to score a few points against what she terms “radical feminists,” who she (like many of my other fellow conservatives) wrongly assume, are all man-hating, baby-hating, single women who are lonely, miserable Cat Ladies.

(The Cat Lady trope is very sexist and needs to die off already. I usually see men tossing this at women. It feels a little more gross to see a woman tossing this sexist stand-by at other women to insult them with.)

In trying to score points against radical feminists, many of whom are actually married with children (and possibly cats) of their own, Johnson creates collateral damage.

Meaning…
Not all conservative, anti-trans agenda, pro-life women are married, can get married, or want to get married. Not all conservative, anti-trans agenda, pro-life women have children, can have children, or want to have children.

Why is Abby Johnson throwing such conservative women under the bus? To get some cheap shots in at liberal, feminist, pro-choice women?

I’m a conservative, and while I do not agree with feminists (radical or otherwise) on every issue, I am not okay with Johnson (or other conservatives) shaming or insulting liberal or pro-choice women over their marital or parenting status, or that of mine or that of other conservative women.

I cannot imagine how Johnson hopes to change any pro-choice minds by carrying on like she is?

Third Baby ‘Strangled by Mom’ Dies in Hospital Three Days After His Two Siblings – Parenthood Doesn’t Make People Happy

Third Baby ‘Strangled by Mom’ Dies in Hospital Three Days After His Two Siblings – Parenthood Doesn’t Make People Happy

Such a sad story.

Another example of how being a parent doesn’t make a person happy, more ethical, or safeguard their mental health.

(Link): Massachusetts mother who strangled her 3 children to death was on a dozen prescription drugs

Feb. 3, 2023

“It’s over medication, absolutely over medications — possibly with a component of post-partum depression.”

(Link): Third baby ‘strangled by mom’ dies in hospital three days after his two siblings

January 27, 2023
by Jessica Kwong

An infant boy who was allegedly strangled by his mother has died three days after his two siblings were pronounced dead.

Eight-month-old Callan Clancy, who was discovered unconscious in his home in Duxbury, Massachusetts, died at 11.18am on Friday, according to the Plymouth County District Attorney’s Office.

Callan was hospitalized on Tuesday after prosecutors found ‘evidence of harm’.

The district attorney’s office earlier this week said Callan’s mother Lindsay Clancy, 32, was suspected of strangling her two older children, Dawson, 3, and Cora, 5.

Man Legally Changed Genders to Gain Custody of His Kids; Trans Groups Concerned

Man Legally Changed Genders to Gain Custody of His Kids; Trans Groups Concerned

Progressive causes like LGBTQ can have all kinds of terrible and unintended consequences, one of which is, perverted men claiming to be trans getting access to women’s bathrooms so they can sexually assault women, but then, there are other odd ball, troubling, or strange ramifications, such as this one (and why would Trans groups be upset about this? Their weird views about sex and gender are responsible for opening this can of worms in the first place)…

Also way further below, I discuss the apparent hypocrisy of conservatives, including Christian gender complementarians, about their inconsistency of when and where to support motherhood, and I also comment on conservative commentator Tucker Carlson’s sexist attitudes about women having careers.

(Link): Man Legally Changed Gender to Gain Custody of His Kids. Trans Groups Are Concerned. – via VICE:

Excerpts:

René Salinas Ramos says the legal change is an attempt to gain full custody of his daughters, because Ecuadoran law favors mothers in custody battles.

By Nathaniel Janowitz
January 5, 2023

A cisgender man in Ecuador legally changed his gender to female in an attempt to gain custody of his two daughters. But LGBTQ groups are concerned about the man’s use of a law designed to promote transgender rights, and what effect it could have in the future.

René Salinas Ramos, 47, told local media that the change was not related to his sexuality or identity, but rather that the Ecuadorian legal system gives preferable rights to mothers over fathers when it comes to the custody of children.

… “I am very sure of my sexuality. What I have sought is that I want to be a mother, so that I can also give the love and protection of a mother.”