Bizarre: Women Who Are Genuinely Fine With Being Single or Childless and Who Publicly Admit It Deeply Disturb or Infuriate Sexist Incel Types and My Fellow Conservatives, Who Want Such Women to Harbor a Victim Mindset

Bizarre: Women Who Are Genuinely Fine With Being Single or Childless and Who Publicly Admit It Deeply Disturb or Infuriate Sexist Incel Types and My Fellow Conservatives, Who Want Such Women to Harbor a Victim Mindset

I have been a conservative person my entire life. I am not liberal, woke, or progressive.

I am not opposed to marriage, motherhood, the nuclear family, or parenthood. I do not support abortion on demand.

For years now, I have noticed the oddest, most disgusting behavior from other conservatives: many of them become unhinged, unsettled, or very angry about women who are truly happy with being single or childless or childfree. It didn’t cross my mind to blog about this observation until now.

The cherry on top of Conservative Outrage on this topic is that the fury seems to be particularly directed at single, childless women who mention on social media or in televised interviews that they’re enjoying life single and childless.

That is, from the angry conservative pro-family types, if you are single, childless (or childfree) and happy about it as a woman, you damn well just better keep it to yourself.

These pro-family conservatives, many of whom even profess to be Christian, further sometimes say things to or about those childless women and tell them personally on social media, how miserable they must be.

They chortle things at them things like, “You will die alone in a house full of cats,” and they say this as though they are filled with glee and happy at the thought of childless women dying alone and unhappy. How perverse.

Some of them, like Catholic Matt Walsh, even like to get ageist, and toss in comments about age at these women, saying to them, “You’re nearing 40…” or, “You’re almost 50….” (See (Link): example Tweet of his here.)

Ditto regarding “incels” or other types of men who are deeply sexist and ageist towards women. They too get very agitated and unglued if a woman publicly admits to being okay, content, or happy with being single or childless.

It’s as though these groups need and desperately want to believe that women who are and remain single or childless (or childfree) are lonely, bitter, miserable, and unhappy, or will become so in the future – and they need to believe that such women are deeply unhappy precisely because those women are single, childless, or childfree.

In the reverse situation, every once in awhile a woman celebrity may publicly say she’s sad that she was never able to have children – and what do the sexist conservatives and d-bag incels do, but immediately take screen captures of the comments, share them all over social media, as if to say,

“See? See?! Feminism has made women miserable. All women obviously want to marry and have babies! They are depressed if they don’t marry and have children, see, see, see!!!
“Women are unable to enjoy life or find contentment if they never marry or never have children, here is your proof, right here, this lady movie star saying she is lonely at 62 and regrets she never had children!!!!”

I’ve never been a feminist, but may I add: if some women are unhappy being childless or single, it may be in part precisely because conservatives and churches are constantly brainwashing women to think their only purpose in life, and their only road to happiness, resides in marrying and becoming pregnant.

If a woman grows up in a family, societal, or religious context that conditions her to think that she can be happy and have meaning only if she marries or has children, well, duh, don’t be surprised if yes, some women may get to adulthood and feel a little down that they’re not married or don’t have kids.

But that would be a result, in part, due to conservative, traditional, old school “family values” brainwashing. That would not be due to “feminism,” of all things

It’s as though many conservatives and sexist lunatics want single and childless women to be unhappy. It’s utterly bizarre to me.

Before I go on further, here is a pertinent article from the WSJ:

(Link): What’s That Ticking Sound? The Male Biological Clock

Men are also at the mercy of age when it comes to having kids

June 25, 2011
By Jennifer Vanderbes

A man’s age when he has children is turning out to be an important factor in that child’s health, according to WSJ contributor Jennifer Vanderbes. Kelsey Hubbard talks to the author about the role a man’s biological clock plays in a child’s risk for diseases and disorders.

Conservatives and the Double Standard Re: Lonely, Single Hetero Men

By the way, I’ve seen more and more articles the last several years that say more and more hetero men are single, and those hetero men either don’t want to date or marry (they’ve lost interest), or, some of them do want to date or marry women, but they can’t seem to get girlfriends and do not know how to go about getting dates or getting a girl friend.

So, I then began seeing news stories such as these about men who are single, some of whom are lonely:

(Link): Guy So Depressed Over Being Single He Cut Off His Own Penis (article)

(Link): ‘Transmaxxing’: Meet The Online Community Encouraging Gender Transitions For Sexually Frustrated (Incel) Men

(Link): Number of ‘Lonely, Single’ Men is on the Rise as Women with Higher Dating Standards Look for Partners Who are ‘Emotionally Available, Good Communicators, and Share Similar Values’, Says Psychologist

(Link): Dear Abby: I (Older, Single Man) Gave Up Dating Women, and 30 Years Later, I’m Lonely

(Link): Bitter, Frustrated 22 Year Old Male Virgin and Member of Men’s Rights / PUA Groups Kills Several Women Because He Couldn’t Get Dates – what an entitled sexist doof

Funny how I seldom see other conservatives mocking such men as the ones mentioned in those news articles for being single and lonely.

If anything, when these topics and news reports of men “falling behind” in culture are brought up, both conservative men and women rush to the men’s defense, to pity them and portray men in culture as being victims.

Often times, such conservatives who paint men as a group as being victims blame women for the men’s victim status, or else, they blame feminism or feminists, for the failings of men – it is so hypocritical and laughable.

By the way, as a conservative, I’ve also noticed that any time a new study or news story is published about men being single and lonely, that conservatives such as (but not limited to) Tucker Carlson will offer very understanding, compassionate, nuanced examinations about these shifts in culture leaving men out in the cold, and how society has supposedly let men down.

Carlson especially likes to invite on conservative women guest speakers on to his television program on Fox News who back Carlson up on this issue, and these women cluck in worry over those poor, poor, single men who are allegedly being kept down and single by a supposedly “feminized” culture of raving, men-hating feminists.

However, if women are under discussion – let’s say there’s a study or news story about women finding it difficult finding suitable marriage partners to marry, or what have you – those very same conservatives who pity men will revoke deep, thoughtful, compassionate analysis to instead snigger in contempt that, “feminism has made you women miserable, ha ha ha, look how  you’ve traded the bliss of family and marriage to being chained to a corporate desk! Ha ha, it’s so wonderful to see single and childless women suffering!”

The culture-wide problems that men face and the ones that women face are treated completely differently by such conservatives, with pity and empathy (and lots of excuses and justifications) being made for the failings or sadness of men,
while women, on the other hand, get roasted, demonized, mocked, and criticized, often for things and problems that they actually did not bring about, but are blamed for anyhow.

I see this phenomenon come up quite often by Tucker Carlson, Matt Walsh, sometimes Ben Shapiro, Candace Owens, and so on.

The men always get a pass, and always get rationalizations and lots of hugs, kisses, and reassurances, and the men’s failings get blamed on women, or on feminism, while the women, on the other hand, usually (wrongly), get blamed for problems they did not create, and they get ridiculed or criticized, too.

Continue reading “Bizarre: Women Who Are Genuinely Fine With Being Single or Childless and Who Publicly Admit It Deeply Disturb or Infuriate Sexist Incel Types and My Fellow Conservatives, Who Want Such Women to Harbor a Victim Mindset”

A Vaccine Or This Marriage: Conspiracy Theories Are Tearing Couples Apart

A Vaccine Or This Marriage: Conspiracy Theories Are Tearing Couples Apart

Ha ha ha haaaaa! And marriage-idolaters such as Al Mohler, and secular and Christian “pro nuclear family” organizations like to assure me, and try to brainwash me, to believe that marriage makes people more mature, giving, and ethical – and that it will “fix” society! LOL!

Marriage-idolater Bradford Wilcox has written articles in the past year to try to convince people that marriage makes people weather the Covid-19 virus fall out better than singleness.

Please understand, though, that the following is from left-leaning Huffington Post, and they will, of course, as liberals and leftists do, try to portray anyone who may have legitimate fears or concerns of coronavirus vaccines as being “conspiracy” crackpot kooks.

(This, from the same people who said when Trump was in office, that they’d not use any vaccines that were rushed out under or by the Trump admin. For example, see this CBS news article or this one from CNN. You liberals and Democrats have not been consistent on this vaccine situation.
You liberals and Democrats were against the vaccines before you were sniping at conservatives to hurry up and get vaccinated already.)

(Link): A Vaccine Or This Marriage: Conspiracy Theories Are Tearing Couples Apart

“He said if I take the vaccine I could pack my bags and leave his kids here.”
by Jesselyn Cook

For Lucy, a 59-year-old metastatic breast cancer patient from Washington state, getting vaccinated against COVID-19 was a matter of life and death.

After undergoing aggressive chemotherapy for months, the coronavirus almost certainly would have killed her.

Yet as relief washed over her upon receiving her final Pfizer dose in March, she knew she’d have to keep it to herself. Her husband had begged her not to get the shot.

Continue reading “A Vaccine Or This Marriage: Conspiracy Theories Are Tearing Couples Apart”

Dear Therapist: My Husband and I Don’t Have Sex Anymore

Dear Therapist: My Husband and I Don’t Have Sex Anymore

~INTRODUCTION (the letter from the sexless marriage lady to the therapist is below)~
Even today, some Christians run around (from what I’ve seen online) making this bogus promise that if people just wait until marriage to have sex, that the sex will be great, and it will be regular.
(This is something Christians did back in the 1980s and 1990s, and they are still doing this today in 2021 – maybe not as much(?), but it definitely still happens on occasion.)

A lot of Christians (and secular conservatives) shame and insult adults who do not have children. They have this false Gospel that The Nuclear Family will save mankind – as in culture, a nation, etc (parenthood and marriage are also included in this).

Well, every so often, I see people write in to advice columnists to say they are in sexless marriages, and quite a few of them say they are unhappy being in a sexless marriage.

Even more interesting is that many of those writing in to the columnists are WOMEN.
As in, these women like sex and want to be having more sex, but their husband, for whatever reason, is totally not into having sex.
Why mention this? Because a lot of idiot Gender Complementarian Christians have this false stereotype that women don’t want sex – they think only men want sex.

Just keep all that in mind as you are reading this, and please check out the links at the bottom, under “Related Posts.”

(Link): Dear Therapist: My Husband and I Don’t Have Sex Anymore

Excerpts:

by L. Gottlieb
June 22, 2019

“I miss the closeness we had before our baby was born.”

Dear Therapist,

[Woman writes in to say she and her husband had a great romance, and after a few months, moved in together. They were engaged, married about two years later, and she got pregnant]

….Our sex was always good before I got pregnant. When our baby was born, my husband had postnatal depression and I had to keep everything together. I was finding it hard inside, but just had to act strong for the both of us. That really put a strain on our marriage.

Our beautiful baby boy is now 15 months old and we never have sex. Our son has just started to sleep through the night, and I think we have gotten so used to taking care of our son at night and not having sex that now it feels so awkward.

Continue reading “Dear Therapist: My Husband and I Don’t Have Sex Anymore”

Mom Blows $10K on Veneers, Botox While Refusing Kids’ Christmas Gifts

Mom Blows $10K on Veneers, Botox While Refusing Kids’ Christmas Gifts

And yet, in spite of headlines I see like the one below, via the New York Post, the Al Mohlers, Bradford Wilcoxes, and other Christian and conservative marriage and parenthood promoters keep on peddling these lies about marriage and parents, such as (but not limited to),
marriage and parenthood makes people more ethical, godly, responsible, giving, and loving, and marriage (Link): and parenthood makes people humans (we’re not human until we procreate – Jesus never procreated, so I guess he was an in-human, sub-species loser by those standards).

(Link): Mom Blows $10K on Veneers, Botox While Refusing Kids’ Christmas Gifts – New York Post

Dec 17, 2020
By Lia Eustachewich

A self-obsessed mom in the UK is making Christmas jingle hell this year by blowing $10,000 on herself — and refusing to spend a single penny on her two children.

Carla Bellucci, 38, boasted about using a stocking full of cash for new veneers, Botox, manicures, facials and brand new duds ahead of Christmas Day, while demanding that her kids, Tanisha, 15, and Jayden, 13, make their own money if they want gifts under the tree.

Continue reading “Mom Blows $10K on Veneers, Botox While Refusing Kids’ Christmas Gifts”

People Who Get Divorced Are More Likely To Die Early Than Those …  Who Never Got Married In the First Place, Study Shows (2020)

People Who Get Divorced Are More Likely To Die Early Than Those …  Who Never Got Married In the First Place, Study Shows

(Link): People who get divorced are more likely to die early than those who drink heavily, have money problems or never got married in the first place, study shows

Excerpts:

By Luke Andrews

People who get divorced are more likely to die than heavy drinkers, people with money problems and those who never got married in the first place, a study has shown.

Scientists revealed the disparity after asking 13,611 American adults aged between 50 and 104 about their lives over the previous 16 years, between 1992 and 2008.

They then collected data on those that died between 2008 and 2014, either through national mortality records or interviews with relatives.

Continue reading “People Who Get Divorced Are More Likely To Die Early Than Those …  Who Never Got Married In the First Place, Study Shows (2020)”

Southern Baptist Al Mohler Intimates That Childless And Childfree Adults Are Not Human (2019) – and He Thinks This is a Good and Biblical Worldview

Southern Baptist Al Mohler Intimates That Childless And Childfree Adults Are  Not Human (2019) – and He Thinks This is a Good and Biblical Worldview

I am amazed that (Link): Mohler’s tweet / blog post / podcast from August 2019, where he indicates that anyone who doesn’t biologically pro-create is not fully human, did not get far more blow-back and attention than it did. Because it most certainly deserved a lot of push back.

(Please note: this post has been edited a few times since I published it, so that I could add more commentary and more links, and I may (or may not) edit it more in the future.)

At the time Mohler’s comment about this happened (August 2019),  I was too busy at the time to blog about it (or even months later). Hence, my post tackling this issue now, in June of 2020.

Mohler did (rightfully) get a lot of flack under the tweet at the time (I would ask that you (Link): click on the tweet link and read the replies he received), and one or two blogs ripped his attitude apart, but by and large, most did not tackle this.

Here is how Mohler’s tweet read (it is also embedded below):

Americans are basically, by the millions, giving up on the fact that to be human is to be a parent, eventually to take on that responsibility to get married and have children, to take on the responsibility of passing on civilization itself.
— end Mohler Tweet content —

Mohler also had a (Link): web page with either an essay or a podcast about this topic, but as of June 2020, the page does not seem to be working (you might be able to view an archived version of that page (Link): here – or view Mohler’s page on (Link): Google Cache).

At this point in time, I do not care to re-explain, for the billionth time, why the Bible and the God of the Bible does NOT support the “nuclear family,” marriage and natalism (and parenthood) to the insane degree that so many social conservatives and Christians and guys like Al Mohler assume.

I refer you to these older posts of mine which explain that no, the Bible does not endorse “the nuclear family,” marriage or parenting, not in the way conservative Christians presume it does (I have many more blog posts discussing this, I will only be sharing a few of them here – also some related posts here):

(Link): Conservatives Have Now Abandoned All Pretense of Advocating For Sexual Abstinence and They Actually Lament the Lack of Fornication – The Bradford Wilcox Piece, 2019

(Link):  “Who is my mother and who are my brothers?” – one of the most excellent Christian rebuttals I have seen against the Christian idolatry of marriage and natalism, and in support of adult singleness and celibacy – from CBE’s site

(Link):   If the Family Is Central, Christ Isn’t, by John B. Carpenter, CP Guest Contributor

(Link): Salvation By Marriage Alone – The Over Emphasis Upon Marriage by Conservative Christians Evangelicals Southern Baptists

(Link): Why Christians Need To Stress Spiritual Family Over the Nuclear Family – People with no flesh and blood relations including Muslims who Convert to Christianity – Also: First World, White, Rich People Problems

(Link): This Christmas, I’m Defining Family by My Single Friends by L. Wilbert

(Link): Family as “The” Backbone of Society? – It’s Not In The Bible

(Link):  Ever Notice That Christians Don’t Care About or Value Singleness, Unless Jesus Christ’s Singleness and Celibacy is Doubted or Called Into Question by Scholars?

(Link):  Really, It’s Okay To Be Single – In order to protect marriage, we should be careful not to denigrate singleness – by Peter Chin

(Link): Parents Who Regret Having Children Speak Honestly About Why It Was A Huge Mistake

(Link): The Bible Does Not Teach Christians to “Focus On The Family” – The Idolization of Family by American Christians (article)

(Link): Why Having Kids Won’t Fulfill You

Mohler Judging If Someone is Human Or Not Based on Their Childed Status

I’m pretty sure that the Bible says all humans are fully human because God deemed them so, and because all humans are created in the image of God.

The Bible says nothing about one’s value or worth or humanity being defined by marital or parental status.

God does not love childless or childfree people any less than he does people who have children.

Continue reading “Southern Baptist Al Mohler Intimates That Childless And Childfree Adults Are Not Human (2019) – and He Thinks This is a Good and Biblical Worldview”

The Rhetoric of Singleness Blog – Links, Comments, Thoughts

The Rhetoric of Singleness Blog

Warning: I discovered through further reading that the author of the blog is a complementarian. I disagree with complementarianism; more on that below.

Had I known from the start she is a complementarian, I may not have started composing this post. I am leery of pointing anyone to a complementarian resource, but here we are.


As of today, I see only a small number of posts on the The Rhetoric of Singleness blog, dating from April 2017, and this blog appears to be from a Christian perspective – but then, her blog does not display a list or pull down menu of all her posts.

Even though the blog looks to be on hiatus, I’ll link to it on the off chance the blogger resumes writing again.

The person behind this blog says she’s single, in her 30s, and has yet to marry but would like to.

(Link): The Rhetoric of Singleness Blog – main page

Some of the only posts I am seeing on this blog include:

(Link): Pursuing Marriage

In that “Pursuing Marriage” post, she says she is a believer in gender complementarianism.

For example, here’s part of what she writes:

So, what options does that leave me, a woman with a complementary view of gender roles, of pursuing marriage? I know for some women who see no options left to them there is a strong temptation to bitterness, resentment, and to denigrate our single brothers who are called by God to the leadership role in the pursuit of marriage.

// end excerpt

Oh no. I (Link): used to be a complementarian myself but ditched it by my mid 30s.

I heard all the same stuff from conservative Christians growing up, as this other blogger likely did, such as, how (Link): men are supposed to be the heads in marriages, God supposedly created women pretty much to exist (Link): only to wait on menand so on.

(And I remained a conservative, even after I realized that complementarianism is false and actually quite sexist – it doesn’t just teach that men and women “complement” one another but that there should be a male hierarchy, of men ruling over women.

Contrary to what complementarians would have you believe, abandoning gender complementarianism will not turn you into a left wing, abortion-supporting, man-hating feminist. I am still right wing, even after leaving complementarianism.)

I am no longer a complementarian, but can pin point complementarianism, among a few other things, as being (Link): one reason as to why I am in my 40s and never got married.

Continue reading “The Rhetoric of Singleness Blog – Links, Comments, Thoughts”