We’re ‘Anti-Mother’s Day’ Moms — We Love Our Kids, But We Deserve a Vacation to Do Whatever We Please This Sunday by A. Grace – Mother’s Day Should Be Abolished
As if I needed more proof that Mother’s Day is a garbage holiday that everyone is wasting their time with – even people who are Mothers themselves are turned into insufferable cows who demand to be worshipped by everyone on Mother’s Day, some of them fight and squabble about Mothers’ Day and get angry at other Mothers for being celebrated on the day. I blogged about that here.
Time to abolish Mother’s Day, it serves no good purpose. All it does is stir up strife and resentment.
Nobody owes you recognition for being a Mother, not even your own children.
(“Honor your mother” in the Bible is not referring to giving non-stop validation to an attention-seeking, self pitying narcissist, which is what a lot of the obnoxious Mothers are who attack anyone who suggests maybe Mother’s Day should be scaled back for the well-being of others. Gratitude is not the same thing as obsequiousness or sycophancy (ass kissing).
Most women are mothers by choice. You chose to become a mother.
You should have known the risks and problems with it prior to becoming a mom.
One reason of several I was never keen on having children myself is because I recognized even as a kid how tiresome and unrewarding motherhood is, and you get no medals or awards for it, and you receive no help.
I knew all that even when I was a pre-teen watching my mother parent my two older siblings who were verbally abusive, obnoxious, bratty teens. Most of the parenting fell to my mother. My Dad would just come home from his job, zone out, and watch TV.
I knew from age five, seeing what other mothers put up with in stores – my Mom would take me along on her grocery shopping trips, and I would see kids around my age or younger pitching fits or screaming for candy and toys, while their mothers looked absolutely frazzled.
I saw such examples (even as a young child) and thought, “Yikes, I don’t think I am up for years and years of putting up with that, I don’t think I want to be a mother. It looks like a huge hassle.”
This article quotes various mothers who go on and on about how the greatest gift they can have for Mother’s Day is a day or two at an adult-only hotel where they get to sleep in all day and just scroll through their cell phones uninterrupted.
One person interviewed says to make sure you send the Mother in your life to an adults-only environment, not a “family friendly” one, because, she says, no mother wants to be around other people’s screaming children.
So, obviously, from what a lot of Mothers themselves say, Motherhood is an exhausting, un-rewarding lifestyle choice.
The following is coming from women who are Mothers, it’s not coming from Marxist, anti-Nuclear Family far leftists or from man-hating, liberal feminists.
If a lot of Mothers’ greatest, best idea for how to spend Mother’s Day is to spend time apart from their children and other people’s children (as this article states that it is), that is truly revealing of how terrible and draining Motherhood actually is.
Motherhood is not fun, full of joy, it doesn’t pump up one’s self esteem, or give one inner peace.
It’s monotony, one gets no time for one’s self, it is exhausting.
And yet, my fellow Conservatives keep trying to brainwash all women – the younger ones in particular – that their lives will be so! much! better! if only they have babies.
And screw the traditional family set up in this scenario, because this is one reason why Mothers suffer burn out.
That is, I am not against the Nuclear Family in and of itself but rather with how the Nuclear Family is typically organized in such a way that most of the responsibilities fall to the woman – especially in regards to housework and childcare.
Most housework and childcare is administered by the wives in marriages.
The men hold down jobs, come home from work, then plant their ass down on the sofa, tune out their wife and kids, to just sit and “zone out” while playing video games.
Studies have shown that married mothers have less free time than married husbands do, so women do not have as much time to re-charge, engage in whatever their hobbies are ((Link): Pew: Working husbands in U.S. have more leisure time than working wives do, especially among those with children)
Here’s one of the comments in this article that really stood out to me:
Sharkey [married mother who got to spend a Mother’s Day away from her children all day] basked in the kid-free, responsibility-free glory of the “anti-Mother’s Day” movement.
— end excerpts —
Women like me who recognize how draining motherhood is, how time consuming it is, how many responsibilities it comes with, who take that into consideration and decide, “Maybe motherhood is not for me,” and then there are other women who know that they know they do not want motherhood, get reamed and insulted up and down by my fellow Conservatives for being childless.
People who do not want to have children should not have them. In the areas of marriage and parenthood, Conservatives should not be shaming people (as they typically do) for knowing themselves, their limits, and what they want, don’t want, and know they would not be good at or what they are not cut out for.
For some women, that is parenting.
Some women realize they don’t have the mindset or stamina to put up with all the non-stop crap that comes with motherhood.
The fact that this woman, and so many other women – all mothers – interviewed for this article below, who say the BEST, greatest Mother’s Day gift is to spend time AWAY from their children and all the Motherhood responsibilities is a full-on admission that Motherhood is not a woman’s best, highest, most rewarding, valuable role in life!
This article’s discussion of what mothers really want for Mother’s Day – time alone, so they can escape Motherhood Responsibilities – shows how false Conservative propaganda about motherhood is.
Think about it, for all the idiots online who scream at people like me who point out that society actually over-reveres Motherhood, that corporations offering opt-outs from Mother’s Day ads is a good thing (it’ s not “anti motherhood”) – they argue it’s a day not just for society to “honor mothers,” but for families to honor their mothers, but the mothers themselves do not want to spend time around their own children, or other people’s children!
That really tells you all you need to know about “Motherhood” and Mother’s Day.
And to any new-comers to my blog: I am not against motherhood, but I am opposed to the false narratives around it (usually put out by other Conservatives), and for the shaming, criticism, and judgement by excessively pro-parenthood types, who insult adults for being childless.
Motherhood and Fatherhood do not make people more godly, loving, ethical, or responsible.
If a person lacks good character prior to marriage and parenthood, they will still lack it if they marry and have children. Getting married and having children are not instant short cuts nor guarantees to developing good ethics or standards.
The article below says that a person cannot pour from an empty cup, which is true. Unfortunately, a lot of Complementarian (Christian) and secular Conservatives brainwash women into sacrificing themselves, into becoming Codependent, or People Pleasers, and neglecting their health, hobbies, and whatever aspirations, to raise children.
Many Conservatives frown on married mothers carving out any time for themselves. Most of them would probably deny this, but they do in fact do so – they confer sainthood on to women who lose themselves to parenthood. Conservatives may not explicitly tell women to wholly sacrifice themselves, but they never-the-less convey the message in a subtle fashion.
Conservatives expect married women to always be subservient to a husband and children, and this is all aligned with secular gender stereotypes, where women are supposed to be natural at being care-takers, we women are supposed to desire to be care-takers (news flash, we do not), women are expected to give up on themselves to raise a kid and be a bang-maid for a husband.
No wonder so many married mothers are burnt out.
(Link): We’re ‘anti-Mother’s Day’ moms — we love our kids, but we deserve a vacay to do whatever we please this Sunday
by Asia Grace
May 9, 2024
Motherhood is the gift that keeps on giving — and giving, and giving until sometimes it seems you can’t take it anymore.
Brooke Sharkey, a married Brooklyn mom of a 2-year-old daughter, had nearly reached her limit just ahead of Mother’s Day last year.
But instead of having a breakdown, she got a much-needed break.
“My husband booked me a one-night stay at the Walker Hotel Tribeca the Saturday before Mother’s Day,” Sharkey, 30, a personal assistant from Bed-Stuy, told The Post. “I took a long shower, watched whatever I wanted on TV, ordered room service, scrolled through social media in peace, treated myself to a fancy dinner and caught a Broadway show.”
“It was the best Mother’s Day gift ever.”
Rather than enduring long restaurant wait times for a platter of pancakes and cold eggs at Sunday brunch, or receiving yet another bouquet of store-bought roses, Sharkey basked in the kid-free, responsibility-free glory of the “anti-Mother’s Day” movement.
It’s a trend away from the sweet, albeit stale, holiday traditions. The unconventional gift grants mom a mini “me time” vacation to sleep, nosh, primp, shop or do absolutely nothing.
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