The Indian Woman Who Chose A Bull Over Marriage

(Link): The Indian Woman Who Chose A Bull Over Marriage

Excerpts:

January 2018

Selvarani Kanagarasu, a daily wage labourer from the south Indian state of Tamil Nadu, has shunned marriage so that she can take care of a prize-fighting bull. BBC Tamil’s Pramila Krishnan talks to her about her life.

Ms Kanagarasu, now 48, was only a teenager when she decided that she wanted to follow in the footsteps of her father and grandfather, who raised bulls that competed in the state’s traditional bull taming contests known as Jallikattu.

Continue reading “The Indian Woman Who Chose A Bull Over Marriage”

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Sex, Lies, and Micro-Cheating: Why Every Dating Trend is Fake News by M. Stadtmiller

(Link): Sex, Lies, and Micro-Cheating: Why Every Dating Trend is Fake News

Excerpts:

“What is microcheating and are you a little bit guilty of it?” the headline asks in (Link): Metro. “What is micro-cheating? It’s the newest infidelity trend to mess up your relationship,” (Link): Bustle tells us. “Micro-cheating: The small actions that some say is as bad as full betrayal,”(Link):  The Independent warns.

 As a writer who has made a living in the made-up “dating term” buzzword space for more than a decade, I don’t know if I can take it any longer. It’s lies, all of it.

None of this is real. It’s filler.

It’s a distraction from the headache of complicated issues involved in figuring out intensely personal and widely variant emotional boundaries with a significant other.

It’s bullshit. All of it.

Continue reading “Sex, Lies, and Micro-Cheating: Why Every Dating Trend is Fake News by M. Stadtmiller”

Joanne The Widow Lady Wants to Know Why God Didn’t Answer Her Prayer to Keep her Husband With Her

Joanne The Widow Lady Wants to Know Why God Didn’t Answer Her Prayer to Keep her Husband With Her

Several months ago, the viewer question segment of the 700 Club’s show was called “Bring It On,” but for whatever the reason, they changed the name of the segment to “Your Questions, Honest Answers.”

On today’s (January 3, 2018) program, a woman named Joanne wrote Pat Robertson with this question (video below). I will type up a transcript of her letter (which was read aloud by the lady co-host) and then I will opine about the letter below the transcript:

Viewer Question Transcript:

My husband and I were happily married for 37 years. Every single night I prayed to God thanking him for my husband and the life we had together.

I asked God to never take him from me, for I had hoped that we would grow old together.

Then one day out of nowhere, my husband was diagnosed with a terminal brain tumor. I was devastated and I felt like my sincere prayer must not have meant anything to God.

Continue reading “Joanne The Widow Lady Wants to Know Why God Didn’t Answer Her Prayer to Keep her Husband With Her”

This Christmas, I’m Defining Family by My Single Friends by L. Wilbert

This Christmas, I’m Defining Family by My Single Friends by L. Wilbert

(Link): This Christmas, I’m Defining Family by My Single Friends by L. Wilbert

Excerpts:

Blood relatives are key to the holiday. But I share a deeper DNA with the body of Christ.

Every Saturday, after evening church services, my husband and I open our home to friends— mostly unmarried ones.

Sometimes it’s four or five friends, sometimes one, sometimes it’s just my husband and me and our housemate, a 24-year-old intern at our church. Whatever the number, we gather around the table in the nook of our kitchen, light candles, listen to one another, pray, sometimes play a game, sometimes mourn with each other, and usually laugh.

Continue reading “This Christmas, I’m Defining Family by My Single Friends by L. Wilbert”

40 Percent of US Pregnancies Out of Wedlock, ‘Shotgun’ Marriages Have Plummeted: Report

40 Percent of US Pregnancies Out of Wedlock, ‘Shotgun’ Marriages Have Plummeted: Report

Some guy from “Institute of Family Studies” is quoted in this – I think that is the same organization that marriage-idolator and singleness-hater (Link): Bradford Wilcox works for, though I don’t see Wilcox himself mentioned in this. (Or maybe Bradford works for a similarly named organization, but not the same one? Hmm.)

One of the women quoted in this article talks about equality of the biological sexes as though equality for both is “bad.” She hissingly spit out the phrase “gender equality” as though the concept is terrible. I disagree.

As a celibate chick, I for one want, need, and appreciate gender equality.

My guess is that her outfit is a conservative Christian one that espouses the sexist “Gender Complementarian” view, which, unfortunately, confuses equality for women with being the same thing as “secular liberal feminism,” when the two are not necessarily the same thing. (I believe in equality for women, but I am not a liberal feminist.)

The last part of the article mentions that young people today are having sex more often, which is (Link): disputed by other articles I’ve seen where both liberals and oddly, conservatives, are freaking out because adult singles (young ones) are NOT having sex – they are celibate.

More commentary is below this link with excerpt:

(Link): 40 Percent of US Pregnancies Out of Wedlock, ‘Shotgun’ Marriages Have Plummeted: Report

Excerpt:

A new Senate report is highlighting the effects of unwed childbearing and family breakdown as approximately 40 percent of births in the United States now occur outside of wedlock. And what are known as “shotgun” marriages are largely a thing of the past.

The sharp rise in nonmarital births is a result of a complex mixture of moral, behavioral, and social changes given how the Sexual Revolution overhauled the American landscape, noted Robert VerBruggen, deputy managing editor of National Review, writing on the blog of the Institute for Family Studies Monday. Two out of every five pregnancies in the United States now occur outside of wedlock.

Continue reading “40 Percent of US Pregnancies Out of Wedlock, ‘Shotgun’ Marriages Have Plummeted: Report”

Mother of Obnoxious Single Guy Who Was Condescending to Single Woman Puts Her Son In His Place

This is from a European paper, hence the use of “Mum” rather than “Mom.”

This story appeared a few days ago, in a different article.

A guy was connected with a single woman named Samantha on a dating site and sent her all sorts of condescending advice. For example, he told her on the dating app that if she just lost some weight that he might be interested in dating her.

The young lady said his behavior hurt her feelings, and she ended up blocking him.

His mother found out what her son did, and she replied.

(Link): Mum shares home truths about ’10 out of 10′ son who shamed woman on dating app

Excerpts:

Michael Blanchard, 24, was talking to Samantha Drain, 23, on the dating app Bumble, when he crossed more than a few lines.

The self-confessed ’10 out of 10’ called the dance teacher from Kent a ‘5 or 6 out of 10’ and sent her a photo of another woman to taunt her.

Continue reading “Mother of Obnoxious Single Guy Who Was Condescending to Single Woman Puts Her Son In His Place”

The Creepy, Sad, and Weird Love Life of Actor Tom Cruise

The Creepy, Sad, and Weird Love Life of Actor Tom Cruise

If you’re a singleton who sometimes reads my blog, and you’re fed up with being single (because you’d like to marry but haven’t been able to find the right person), this 2012 article from Vanity Fair might cheer you up.

Rest assured that your love life (or life as a single) cannot possibly be AS BAD or bizarre as Cruise’s.

There is a link way down the page to a Vanity Fair magazine article about how Tom Cruise’s church “auditions” women to be his girlfriends or wives.

Before I get a bunch of haters and get to the VF link: I don’t hate Tom Cruise, though he does come across as sounding like a weirdo, insensitive, and just as, or almost, self-absorbed as my ex fiance, in the Vanity Fair article I’m featuring farther below.

I don’t even know as I care so much that he’s into Scientology.

I only remark on Scientology in so far as it reminds me of the Protestant, Baptist, sort of evangelical Christianity I was raised in, in regards to the stupid and confining views on dating and marriage.

I read this Vanity Fair article about Cruise the other day, and it relates to a few of the subjects I blog about on here at times.

Continue reading “The Creepy, Sad, and Weird Love Life of Actor Tom Cruise”

Single Mom Writes to Ask Amy: She’s Into Her Best Friend, But He’s Using Her

It sounds to me as though this guy is stringing her along, and she’d be better off without him.

It’s the second letter on this page:

DEAR AMY: I am a single mom. I’m in love with my best friend. He means more to me than anything, but the one thing he can’t give up is his freedom of being single. He loves me, but wants his cake and to eat it, too.

When I try to move on and date other people, he pulls me back into thinking that he wants to be with me.

I love him so much that I keep letting him play with my heart.

I am having a hard time trying to be “friends with benefits” because I have such strong feelings for him. His family loves me, his daughter loves me and my kids love him and his family.

We’ve been doing this for almost two years. I practically live there when my kids are not with me. I am afraid of letting him go. I’m afraid I won’t find someone like him. What should I do?

(Signed), Confused Heart

 

Study Says: More Women Than Men Content Being Single

Study Says: More Women Than Men Content Being Single

(Link): Study Says: More Women Than Men Content Being Single

(Link): More women are content while single than men, study says

(Link): Women Are More Likely To Have a Close Network of Friends They Can Turn to For Support

Nov 12, 2017

Women are happier being single than men are, because being in a relationship is harder work for women, new research suggests.

According to a study by data analysts Mintel, 61 per cent of single women are happy being single, versus 49 per cent of single men.

The survey also found that 75 per cent of single women have not actively looked for a relationship in the last year, compared to 65 per cent of single men.

Continue reading “Study Says: More Women Than Men Content Being Single”

Dating And Sex: Men Who Find Talking to Women Difficult May Soon Have a Hormone Treatment

Dating And Sex: Men Who Find Talking to Women Difficult May Soon Have a Hormone Treatment

This doesn’t sound like something women would like – the article says this drug or hormone or whatever it is –  causes males to be even more persistent towards females, and that it does so in part by lowering their anxiety or inhibitions.

Oh no. The world is already filled with over-confident, dweeby, too-persistent men who don’t take hints from women we are NOT interested in them romantically or sexually and want them to stop hitting on us or trying to flirt with us out in public, at school, or at jobs.

(Link): Dating And Sex: Men Who find Talking to Women Difficult May Soon Have a Hormone Treatment

Researchers have identified a hormone that can embolden men sexually and make them less anxious about pursuing women.

Continue reading “Dating And Sex: Men Who Find Talking to Women Difficult May Soon Have a Hormone Treatment”

First Evidence That Online Dating Is Changing the Nature of Society

First Evidence That Online Dating Is Changing the Nature of Society

(Link): First Evidence That Online Dating Is Changing the Nature of Society

Excerpts:

Dating websites have changed the way couples meet. Now evidence is emerging that this change is influencing levels of interracial marriage and even the stability of marriage itself.

Continue reading “First Evidence That Online Dating Is Changing the Nature of Society”

Fewer People Are Getting Married – And That’s A Good Thing by J. Wright

Fewer People Are Getting Married – And That’s A Good Thing by J. Wright

If you are new to my blog, I’d like to inform you that I am a conservative, a right winger.

I am not against “the family unit” or against marriage, but, I have noticed that a lot of other conservatives have disparaged singleness and have elevated marriage (as well as parenting and natalism) in to false idols they worship.

So, I’m not against marriage, babies, or the nuclear family, but I am opposed to the over-emphasis upon those things by my fellow conservatives.

(Link): Fewer People Are Getting Married – And That’s A Good Thing by J. Wright

Excerpts:

In a week full of terrible things, the Wall Street Journal published an essay entitled  (Link): “Cheap Sex and the Decline of Marriage” that pondered, “Why is marriage in retreat among young Americans? Because it is now much easier for men to find sexual satisfaction outside marriage.”

“Women: They’re Destroying Everything with Their Sluttery” is, I suppose, kind of a fun theory for an article if your readers hate women.

But the notion that unmarried young people are having an unprecedented amount of sex is without basis in fact. Studies from the (Link): Archives of Sexual Behavior indicate that extramarital sex is actually on the decline. Baby boomers are estimated to have 11 average sexual partners over their lifetimes, while millennials are expected to have only eight.

It stands to reason that women as well as men are having less cheap and easy sex.

Oh, well.

Continue reading “Fewer People Are Getting Married – And That’s A Good Thing by J. Wright”

Stop Asking People Whether They’re Married – Even As An Icebreaker

Stop Asking People Whether They’re Married – Even As An Icebreaker

Another suggestion: if you’re meeting someone over age 35, and they’re alone, do NOT assume they have been previously married or have had kids (don’t ask them, “So, how long has it been since you divorced”).

A lot of church people are bad about that. Any time I’ve walked into a church post age 35, they always ASSUME I am divorced (I have never been married, so this really annoys me).

(Link): Stop Asking People Whether They’re Married – Even As An Icebreaker

Excerpts:

by Bella DePaulo and Joan DelFattore

…. But what one of you probably would say before long is, “Are you married?” It’s seen as the most natural of ice-breakers, as if it’s the first thing strangers need to know about each other.

We, and dozens of people we’ve asked about this, encounter the question everywhere. Even random strangers sitting next to us in a train or plane will ask, “Are you married?”

Sometimes the questioner assumes you’re married— like the car dealer who asks if your husband is with you, or the job interviewer who says, “Do you need to talk it over with your wife?” When setting up online accounts, security questions such as “Where did you go on your honeymoon?” or “What is your maiden name?” seem inescapable.

Cue the music from the Twilight Zone, because what we have here is a time warp.

Continue reading “Stop Asking People Whether They’re Married – Even As An Icebreaker”

Formerly Jailed Pedophile Looking for Dates with Women on Dating Site

Formerly Jailed Pedophile Looking for Dates with Women on Dating Site

Disgusting. This is from a UK site. There are several photos of this person on the page linked to below:

(Link): LONELY HEART PAEDO Hulking perv who was caged for sex attacks on schoolgirls is looking for love on Plenty of Fish

August 2017

Kelvyn Jackson tells potential dates he ‘doesn’t want kids’ and describes himself as a ‘teddy bear’

He was caged in 2011 for eight years but has now set up a profile on the popular online dating site after being released from prison.

Jackson calls himself a “teddy bear” and a “coffee snob” and even tells potential dates he is “medically retired” – but fails to mention he is on the Sex Offenders’ Register.

The bald paedo has also uploaded a string of images – including a pouting selfie showing off his beard.

Continue reading “Formerly Jailed Pedophile Looking for Dates with Women on Dating Site”

Why You Shouldn’t Date the Guy Who Acts the Most Interested by J. Birch

Why You Shouldn’t Date the Guy Who Acts the Most Interested by J. Birch

(Link): Why You Shouldn’t Date the Guy Who Acts the Most Interested by J. Birch

Excerpts:

…. Despite lingering doubts, she ended up in a marriage by her mid-20s — with a husband whose enthusiasm was not, in fact, all it had seemed to be. It waned over time.

He did not defend her in front of his family members, they fought constantly, he did not consider her feelings. By her late 20s, she was divorced, with a whole slew of different (and correct) thoughts about “how things should be” the next time around.

Addison isn’t alone in her previous beliefs about dating and relationships. Somewhere along the way, women were told, “You deserve to be pursued!” and, yeah, we just went with it.

Through my research (and even among friends), I’ve met plenty of women who’ve literally gone their entire lives letting men sort themselves by early, most-evident interest.

Their “single girl” dating ritual is simple: Strongest pursuer wins. (Side note: This is a heteronormative exploration of dating rituals and for that reason a heteronormative article on said rituals.)

With a (Link): culture of ghosting, bread-crumbing, zombie-ing, and just flat-out constant shuffling, I get that things seem inherently fragile out there, and lots of people want to insulate against rejection.

Continue reading “Why You Shouldn’t Date the Guy Who Acts the Most Interested by J. Birch”

Woman Who Paid $150K for Dating Service Sues After Meeting ‘Married Men And Criminals’

Woman Who Paid $150K for Dating Service Sues After Meeting ‘Married Men And Criminals’

This does sound like a very crummy dating service.

(Link): Ex-QVC honcho shopped for love, then sued her matchmaker

(Link):  Woman Who Paid $150K for Dating Service Sues After Meeting ‘Married Men And Criminals’

by McAteer

August 2017

A retired corporate executive claims a high-end matchmaking service set her up with a string of highly unsuitable men, according to a lawsuit.

Darlene Daggett, former president for US commerce for the home shopping channel QVC, says she paid $150,000 for the service but was set up with married or mentally unstable men. Some were even convicted criminals, reports philly.com.

Continue reading “Woman Who Paid $150K for Dating Service Sues After Meeting ‘Married Men And Criminals’”

Author Claims Andrea Tantaros’ Book About How Feminism ‘Made Women Miserable’ Was Ghostwritten by a Man

Author Claims Andrea Tantaros’ Book About How Feminism ‘Made Women Miserable’ Was Ghostwritten by a Man

Judge Won’t Let Andrea Tantaros Keep Secret Her Feminism Book Was Ghostwritten By Man

I wrote a review (or critique) of this book a few months ago. In my review, I noted it was a variation on the old conservative saw to blame feminism for why single women are having a difficult time getting dates or getting married.

I disagree. I lived life as a June Cleaver house-wife type (meaning, though I was single, I very docile, passive, sweet, ladylike) for decades, and I never got married.

Being a conservative ideal of a woman is not a guarantee you’re going to get dates or get married, so my fellow conservatives can kindly stop promoting that view.

So, as it turns out, a man – yes, a man – wrote the “anti feminist” book with Tantaros’ name on it, telling women if they want to get a man and keep one, to ditch their independence, their agency, and behave like doormats.

(Link):  Judge Will Not Allow Former Fox News Host to Conceal Identity of Her Feminism-Bashing Book’s Male Ghostwriter

(Link): Author Claims Andrea Tantaros’ Book About How Feminism ‘Made Women Miserable” Was Ghostwritten by a Man

Excerpts

Former Fox News starlet Andrea Tantaros made a name of herself in the conservative echelons of cable news punditry by (Link): blaming feminists for everything from the decline of marriage to statutory rape.

So when her book Tied Up in Knots: How Getting What We Wanted Made Women Miserable was released last year it seemed par for the course that she would dedicate hundreds of pages to how she— a capable, self-sufficient, feminine anti-feminist— was so much better off than her feminist counterparts.

Continue reading “Author Claims Andrea Tantaros’ Book About How Feminism ‘Made Women Miserable’ Was Ghostwritten by a Man”

Welcoming Singles Into Your Church by E. Metaxas via Gina Dalfonzo

Welcoming Singles Into Your Church by E. Metaxas via Gina Dalfonzo

(Link): Welcoming Singles Into Your Church by E. Metaxas via Gina Dalfonzo

Excerpt

… Many churches today “don’t know what to do with the single and childless,” Gina notes. “While churches offer couples’ weekends to strengthen marriages, and Ultimate Frisbee games for families, many are not able to offer much help, or opportunities for service for the singles in their congregation.”

And sadly, fellow Christians, sometimes unknowingly, make singles feel as if they themselves are to blame for their unmarried state. That somehow if they haven’t tied the knot yet, they must be too self-centered, or too picky, or too focused on their career.

The truth is many singles deeply desire and pray for marriage.

Continue reading “Welcoming Singles Into Your Church by E. Metaxas via Gina Dalfonzo”

How Single Men and Women are Making Politics More Extreme by Ed West

How Single Men and Women are Making Politics More Extreme

I’m a single woman, but I’ve never been liberal.

(Link): How Single Men and Women are Making Politics More Extreme

….The more freedom we have, the more there will be very feminine and masculine subcultures too, and this might explain a great deal of recent political developments — in particular the campus identity politics movement and the alt-right.

The former is heavily female, while the latter is overwhelmingly male — in fact, not just male, but populated by men who seem to have difficulties with women.

…Single women tend to be politically very liberal, voting for the Democrats in huge numbers….

Generally speaking, the culture wars are far more intense between women because women have to make more sacrifices — whether children or career — and this inevitably influences their worldview.

Continue reading “How Single Men and Women are Making Politics More Extreme by Ed West”

Only Couples Allowed? The Need to Celebrate Singleness in the Church. by P. Greer

Only Couples Allowed? The Need to Celebrate Singleness in the Church by P. Greer

A guy I follow on Twitter, and who follows me, named Andrew W. shared this link on his Twitter profile. I see in the comment box that my one-time stalker left a comment on that page.

(Link): Only Couples Allowed? The Need to Celebrate Singleness in the Church.

Excerpts (to see the full list, please click link above to visit the page):

…But I see a different story in Scripture. Jesus chose to remain single. Another bachelor, the apostle Paul said, “I wish that all of you were [single] as I am” (1 Corinthians 7:7).

Paul celebrated singleness and referred to it as a gift.  At the very least, in today’s world, let’s not put so much pressure on singles or only view the world through the “you-have-to-be-married” lens.

To my married friends, here are several dos and don’ts on how to celebrate singleness:

Continue reading “Only Couples Allowed? The Need to Celebrate Singleness in the Church. by P. Greer”