“Protect Yourself”: Gen X Woman Warns People Against The Tradwife Trend After Being One Herself

“Protect Yourself”: Gen X Woman Warns People Against The Tradwife Trend After Being One Herself 

(Link): “Protect Yourself”: Gen X Woman Warns People Against The Tradwife Trend After Being One Herself 

April 16, 2024
By Miglė Miliūtė and Ilona Baliūnaitė

There are so many trends on social media nowadays, it can be hard to keep track of them all. But one of them has caused quite a buzz recently, as it seems to have split people into camps about it—it’s tradwife content.

An intuitive life coach, energy worker, and medium, Meredyth Willits, recently went viral for sharing her views on the topic in a TikTok video. By pointing out certain negative aspects of such a lifestyle, she started a debate as fellow netizens expressed varying opinions. Scroll down to find Meredyth’s video below, where you will also find her recent interview with Bored Panda.

The so-called tradwife content seems to be getting increasingly popular among internet users, many of whom are rather young

A representative of Gen X shared her views on the matter, pointing out some negative sides of said lifestyle

“Why is trad wife content suddenly blowing up? Because people my age that were traditional wives are getting divorced and realizing that they threw 20 years of optional, available, could-have-been energy into the workforce, into their future, they threw that away doing laundry and watching their kids.”

“Now, don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t trade staying home with my children for anything. However, I would have insisted on some sort of investment into my future, either by way of a 401k, a home in my name, or I would have had to have some sort of side gig where I could have put that on a resume if anything happened to my husband or our marriage.

“And so people my age, women that are in their 40s and 50s that have raised their children, who have been traditional wives are coming forward and talking about the realities of that, because someone like my grandmother, who couldn’t have left her husband no matter what, because she went from high school and her parents into being a stay-at-home wife and mother, she could never have left. Ever.”

“So I being 51, I am like one of the first or second generations of women being traditional stay-at-home wives who are coming out and saying, “Don’t do this to yourself.” Trad wife content is becoming super popular right now.

“Because what’s happening is the trad wife is glamorizing staying home, and being a homemaker, and a stay at home mother, which again, there’s nothing wrong with that. As long as you talk about the fact that if your husband dies, you’re screwed, like triple double screwed.

I have a family member that if her husband died or left her tomorrow, she would be a stay-at-home wife broke on her a** with four kids and no way to support herself. Or if he died, she’s completely screwed.

“And for all of you out there that say, “Just marry a really good man,” and that’s great and all, but what if you’re sick of this really great man? What if he dies? What if he becomes incapable of going to work?

“It’s not that ‘trad wife content is extremely popular right now, everyone is just being mean’, what’s happening is is that we are the second generation of women coming forward to say ‘quit being so goddamn stupid and protect yourself’.”

“50% of marriages end in divorce. And while he’s making $100,000+ a year, you have no skills, no career, no resume, nothing except for kids and a dog and god knows what else. You will be living in an apartment while he’s got his new 20 something in his penthouse or the family home. So good luck.

“This content isn’t becoming popular because we’re mean, this content is becoming popular because you’re glamorizing a lifestyle that you have know nothing about. You know nothing about. You’re just the baby trad wife and that’s okay, too.”

“And by the way, I’m not angry or bitter. I own an island and a Porsche. I have an amazing husband, but don’t get it twisted. My kids were eating 99 cent pizzas when I was a single mom, we didn’t go on vacation, and we had no money to go to Burger King. It’s not bitterness, it’s reality. If you get traded in, that’s all there is to it. Your entire life is dependent on whether or not he still likes you. Good luck”

Article: What Happens To Christian Influencers When They Get Married? (They Act Like Marriage Gives Them a License to Become Salacious)

Article: What Happens To Christian Influencers When They Get Married? (They Act Like Marriage Gives Them a License to Become Salacious)

If you’ve visited this blog before, you may be surprised to discover I rarely go to You Tube and look up videos about Christian views on singleness, marriage, dating, and sex. I also don’t visit TikTok much.

All of this means I’m not hip to all the dopey, no doubt annoying, cloying, Christian or goody two shoes Mormon channels and accounts that pertain to dating, singleness, marriage and sex.

It does seem that some of these religious influencers who emphasize abstinence are being a little inappropriate, weird, and hypocritical upon marriage by doing a sharp turn into “sex positive” content.

And you know, as a life long celibate, let me tell all the married religious people out there: while the Bible is fine with sex within marriage, it is salacious to go on and on about it the way these influencers do, or the way pastors like Mark Driscoll do in their sermons and videos.

If you’re a pastor, maybe keep the “sex tips” type garbage behind closed doors, for married couples only, so that singles don’t have to hear “45 saucy ways for a wife to give her husband a blow job” messages in church sermons or Christian podcasts (because you know these sexists will never expect the men to perform cunnilingus).

This doesn’t mean that single Christian adults cannot or should not be allowed to discuss sex or sexuality, but I’d say, partition it off, so that the singles discuss those topics from the singleness perspective, rather than force your singles to sit through sermons for married couples about “why and how married sex is hot and steamy.”
It’s insensitive, tasteless, and stupid, like making your friend who is on a diet sit and watch you eat a big piece of chocolate cake.

(Link): What Happens To Christian Influencers When They Get Married? 

Excerpts:

by Kelsey Weekman
BuzzFeed News Reporter
Posted on July 6, 2022

….There’s no shortage of influencer couples doing vaguely sexy gags on the platform, but this post was a striking departure from Beal’s former content.
For 12 years, she encouraged single people to avoid all sexual content (including, for example, watching TV shows and Instagram Reels that mention sex) on Girl Defined, the Christian lifestyle blog and YouTube channel she shares with her sister Kristen Clark.
After first going viral in 2021 about how she saved her first kiss for her wedding day at 30, Beal pivoted to content about sex, like selling a $12 PDF with tips for wives on how to talk about it.

Beal and Clark’s content was predominantly known only in Christian circles until YouTuber Cody Ko shared a video of himself and Noel Miller reacting to videos from the Girl Defined YouTube channel such as “Is It OK to Be Obsessed With Guys?” and “Six Guys You Shouldn’t Date, Court, or Marry.” As a result, Redditors and YouTubers called Beal and Clark out as promoters of harmful purity culture.

Beal is one of several purity influencers who are now posting sexual content after years of posts encouraging abstinence and shame around premarital sex.
Bailey McKnight, a 22-year-old Mormon who skyrocketed to YouTube fame with her identical twin Brooklyn, shifted to selling vibrators after getting married last year. Chelsea Hurst used to dispense “Christian teen advice” on avoiding sexual situations, and now she’s made multiple videos about her “first time” with her husband, which she described as “joyful … not painful.”

…It’s not necessarily inconsistent for Christian women who talk about not having sex before marriage to then start talking about sex after marriage. But the change can be jarring for some followers who are used to the influencers’ pro-abstinence messaging, and the swerve typically happens without any explanation of the transition.

Married St. Louis Principal Pleads Guilty to Hiring Hitman to Kill His Pregnant Teacher Girlfriend and Her Unborn Baby

Married St. Louis Principal Pleads Guilty to Hiring Hitman to Kill His Pregnant Teacher Girlfriend and Her Unborn Baby

Marriage and parenthood do not make people more godly, loving, responsible or ethical, as so many of my fellow conservatives keep insisting.

(Link): Married St. Louis principal pleads guilty to hiring hitman to kill his pregnant teacher girlfriend and her unborn baby

Cornelius M. Green pleaded guilty Wednesday in a plea agreement that will see state charges — which carry the possibility of the death penalty — dropped if he’s sentenced to life.

March 1, 2024
By Marlene Lenthang

A married Missouri middle school principal who hired a friend to kill his pregnant girlfriend and her unborn child has pleaded guilty to the 2016 murder-for-hire plot.

Cornelius M. Green, who was principal at Carr Lane Visual and Performing Arts Middle School in St. Louis, was accused of orchestrating the murder of 30-year-old Jocelyn Peters and her unborn baby on March 24, 2016.

Green pleaded guilty to the federal charges of murder for hire conspiracy and murder for hire on Wednesday.

Can Christian Singles Thrive? How Singles Around the World Confront the Likelihood of Remaining Unmarried By Anna Broadway

Can Christian Singles Thrive? How Singles Around the World Confront the Likelihood of Remaining Unmarried By Anna Broadway

This author, Anna Broadway, has a new book about adult singleness being released soon (March 2024), I think it’s called “Solo Planet.”

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This essay she wrote I am featuring excerpts of here touches on several topics I’ve raised before, one of which is Bedroom Evangelization, where some Christians mistakenly think God teaches that the way to grow the kingdom of God is via biological reproduction – married couples having sex and making children. The Bible does not teach that.

The Bible repeatedly teaches, in the New Testament, that one’s spiritual siblings (other Christians) are of equal, or more, import than one’s biological family, and that God’s kingdom is grown by Christians sharing the Gospel with non-believers.

But many Christians prefer a worldly, secular solution and approach – they prefer the idea of getting more Christians married off to enlarge the church (which again the Bible does not teach) – but it’s the same situation as to how God warned the Israelites in the Old Testament that having a king, as they kept asking for, was not a good idea.

Just because you marry and have children does not mean that your children will accept your beliefs. They may later reject them as they age.

(Link): Can Christian Singles Thrive? How Singles Around the World Confront the Likelihood of Remaining Unmarried By Anna Broadway

Excerpts:

by Anna Broadway
August 2021

…Researching singleness was not the academic project I’d have wished for myself. By the time of my May 2018 departure, the question of whether Christian singles could still thrive without a partner had become an urgently personal one. I was weeks from my fortieth birthday and starting to face the likelihood of dying barren and unmarried.

For most of my life, well-intended Christians had assured me that the fact I wanted marriage must mean God intended to give it to me. Yet the more I’ve learned about racial injustice, the less this view holds up. If so many long for a justice they don’t receive in their lifetimes, how dare I assume my longing for marriage is any likelier to resolve as I want?

The global church has at least eighty-five million more women than men among adults thirty or older; the US church has twenty-five million more women. Even if some of those women have or find spouses outside the faith, that leaves millions who can’t ever marry – a reality the church has yet to face. Instead, most Christians I met around the world treated heterosexual marriage as the primary narrative axis in life. Marrieds and singles alike seemed largely unaware of or unwilling to reckon with this significant demographic disconnect.

And the gap may be worse than it seems. For one thing, not all Christian men can or will marry. Those who do marry may not seek Christian wives. In her 2019 book Relatable, Vicky Walker reports that almost two-thirds of women in her survey, but only half the men, deemed a Christian spouse “non-negotiable.” The numbers get far worse as age and the sex gap increase. Factor in the more pronounced unevenness caused by genocide, war, mass incarceration, and other factors, and women’s prospects for marriage get worse yet.

Yet most Christians continue to act – and churches to teach – as if nearly all will marry, with the corollary implication that it’s singles’ fault when we don’t. With that comes a tendency to view singleness as a second-class status – as missing out and falling short.

I’m 64, Was Married for 35 Years and Have Had Five Children. But I’ve Never Had an Orgasm – by C. Baker

I’m 64, Was Married for 35 Years and Have Had Five Children. But I’ve Never Had an Orgasm – by C. Baker

Growing up Southern Baptist and exposed to Protestant evangelical teachings, I often heard it said that if one remained a virgin until marriage, that married sex would be great, regular, and mind-blowing – at the very least, marital sex was framed as being vastly superior to pre-marital sex.

I don’t know if this lady was chaste until she married (I’ve since finished reading the article, and yes, I believe she says she was a virgin when she married), but it sounds like the sex was disappointing and a let down.

She says her husband died nine years ago, and while married, her husband did not sound attentive to her or her needs. Another example (I have many others on this blog) of how getting married is not a guarantee or regularly (if ever) getting your needs (emotional, sexual, or otherwise) met.

(Link): I’m 64, was married for 35 years and have had five children. But I’ve never had an orgasm

by Carole Baker
January 24, 2024

Whatever activities I imagined I’d be doing on my honeymoon, phoning my mum in floods of tears wasn’t one of them. But my husband Alan and I had just consummated our marriage — and it had been a huge disappointment.

Far from sensuous and thrilling, it was a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it perfunctory affair. And it didn’t help that as soon as he’d finished, Alan plonked himself down in front of the TV to watch football in the Devon hotel, where we were staying for a week after our summer wedding. Convinced I’d made a terrible mistake, I rang my mum and told her I wanted to come home. Not sure what to say, she put Dad on the phone, who reassured me it was just early days.

This was back in 1978 and you’d be forgiven for thinking that after getting to know each other’s bodies, we went on to have a fulfilling sex life during our 35-year marriage. Particularly as we would have five children together. But though I was devoted to Alan, who sadly died nine years ago having suffered from Parkinson’s, I did not have a single orgasm in our entire marriage.

In fact, now 64, I have never had an orgasm with a man — or indeed without a man.

In our sexually liberated times, it can feel like I’m the only woman in England in this frustrating predicament. We overshare in so many ways but female sexual gratification is still something of a taboo — especially for older women.

My Fiancé Wants Me to Sign a Prenup that Says I Won’t Stop Sleeping With Him After We’re Married – but It Makes Me Feel Like I’m a Sex Slave by L. Lefroy

My Fiancé Wants Me to Sign a Prenup that Says I Won’t Stop Sleeping With Him After We’re Married – but It Makes Me Feel Like I’m a Sex Slave by L. Lefroy

I can understand someone wanting a prenup to protect their finances (if they’re well off), but this is a creepy level of control freakery.  If I were this lady, I would run in the opposite direction.

Also, let this go to show that never-married adults over the age of 39 are not the creepy ones – sometimes, some people suggest something must be wrong with someone if they’re not been married yet by, say, age 35 or so.

Here we have a guy who is divorced, he was married at least once previously, but he’s wanting his wife to basically sign a sex slave contract (the woman’s depiction of this is accurate), which is why creepy.

(Link): My fiancé wants me to sign a prenup that says I won’t stop sleeping with him after we’re married – but it makes me feel like I’m a sex slave

Excerpts:

by Emily Lefroy
January 2024

A pre-nuptial agreement is not uncommon in modern marriages – but one man’s very unusual stipulation in his marital arrangement has left people up in arms.

The bizarre prenup note was revealed by the man’s enraged fiancée, who expressed her horror at her future husband’s demand in a recent post on Reddit’s ‘Am I The A**hole’ thread.

She explained that, in addition to financial terms, her partner wanted to add a clause to their prenup in which she would be forced to guarantee having sex with him a certain number of times every single week.

…She shared that before they were dating, her fiancé – also 34 – had a terrible marriage that ‘ended in a dead bedroom’.

‘He’s determined to never go back to that life again,’ she wrote. ‘Understood, I think that sucked for him to experience.’

While she took no issue with his concerns, it was what he wanted to add to their already existing prenup next that shocked her.

‘He wants a prenup and literally write in the prenup that we will have sex x amount of times a week, or else I get absolutely nothing in the divorce,’ she shared.

‘I had already agreed to a 50/50 prenup of marital assets, and we keep what we came into the marriage with,’ the unnamed woman detailed.

‘Now that’s not enough for him. He wants me to “prove” that I won’t stop having sex with him in the future.

‘I tell him I can’t prove the future, and putting something in writing doesn’t prove that,’ she wrote.

Dear Abby: I Can’t Satisfy My Wife, Should I Let Her Sleep with Her Client?

Dear Abby: I Can’t Satisfy My Wife, Should I Let Her Sleep with Her Client?

Nope. No. No. No. No. No, you don’t allow, or even entertain the thought of your spouse, having sex with another person because you think you’re not pleasing them sexually in bed, or because they ask you to.

Christians, as I’ve said before, need to stop assuming that all single adults are fornicating (we’re not – I’m a celibate single),
and so, on those rare occasions they bother to lecture or preach against sexual sin, they need to stop aiming “sexual purity” messages ONLY at SINGLES – because there are a lot of married men and married women having affairs, making porn, looking at porn, joining “swingers” groups and etc.

There is nothing intrinsic in marriage that makes the people who enter the institution more godly, mature, ethical, loving, or responsible.

If you were selfish, immature, evil, abusive, and a great big jerk PRIOR to marriage, get a wedding ring on your finger is not going to transform you.

This is just revolting and makes a mockery of marriage.

Just divorce, go your separate ways, and she can fornicate as a single adult, which is, imo, a little less sinful and disgusting than being a married person screwing around with someone else.

Better yet – your wife won’t die without sex; stay married and tell her under no circumstances should she fornicate.

Just because you cannot give her the type of sex she wants doesn’t mean she’ll die from lack of it.

Too many people have turned sex into an idol. You won’t die without sex.

I think this man’s letter to Dear Abby also puts to rest some of the stupid, sexist teachings I’ve seen from Christian gender complementarians over my life, and from other types of Christians – that is, many Christians incorrectly assume that women are not interested in sex, that women don’t want sex, or don’t enjoy it.

This also goes to show that the old Christian saw about “wait until you get married to have sex, and the sex will be regular and mind-blowing” is also false.

(Link): Dear Abby: I can’t satisfy my wife, should I let her sleep with her client

DEAR ABBY: 
I’ve been married to the most amazing woman for 30 years. She became a personal trainer and is in incredible shape.

I’m not in her kind of shape, and I can’t perform too well sexually, even with ED meds.

She recently asked if she could have her (sexual) needs taken care of by a young client she trains.

I’m OK with it, since I’m sympathetic to her desires, as long as she doesn’t fall in love. Your thoughts?
— WANTS WHAT’S BEST FOR HER

Married Mother of One Year Old Daughter Arrested for Allegedly Sending Explicit Videos to Student, Inviting Boy to Home for Sex When Husband Was Away

Married Mother of One Year Old Daughter Arrested for Allegedly Sending Explicit Videos to Student, Inviting Boy to Home for Sex When Husband Was Away

“…when her husband was away.”
This mother clucker is a MARRIED woman. She’s married. She is also mother to a one year old child says one news report.

As I was saying not too long ago in another post about another married teacher who was allegedly abusing children:

Does marriage make people more godly, mature, responsible, loving, self-sacrificing, or holier, as my fellow conservatives so often insist it does? No. No it does not.

I have many other examples on my blog, taken from news sites, of married persons who were found out to be serial cheaters, pedophiles, animal abusers, and reports of married men who hired hitmen to murder their wives.

Does being part of a Nuclear Family make one more godly, loving, ethical, or responsible than being single and childless? Nope, not at all.

Does God require the single adult to better herself in someway, or improve herself, before God will permit her to have a spouse? Nope.

I’ve seen too many news stories over my life of married persons who are total scum buckets to believe God with-holds spouses from people due to personal sins and failings. Some serial killers even were married – including John Wayne Gacy, for God’s sake!

My fellow conservatives are out there regularly shaming and criticizing single women for being single – and being single is not a sin (see 1 Corinthians 7 among other Bible passages) – when there are pond scum, pieces of vomit, like this married woman, who is fondling children, and soon after her wedding!

(Link): Missouri teacher arrested for allegedly sending explicit videos to student, inviting boy to home for sex when husband was away

Missouri teacher arrested for allegedly sending explicit videos to student, inviting boy to home for sex when husband was away

by Paul Sacca
October 26, 2023

A Missouri teacher was arrested for reportedly sharing explicit photos and videos with a 16-year-old student. The teacher also allegedly invited the minor to have sex with her at her home while her husband was away.

Rikki Lynn Laughlin – a 25-year-old teacher at St. James High School, located about 95 miles southwest of St. Louis – is accused of being involved in a teacher sex scandal by police in Missouri.

(Link): Teacher, 24, allegedly sent nude photos to student, 16, propositioned him for sex

Oct 26, 2023
By Yaron Steinbuch

A 24-year-old Missouri teacher allegedly exchanged nude images with a 16-year-old student and invited him to her home to have sex while her husband was away.

(Link): Missouri teacher Rikki Lynn Laughlin, 24, faces 20 years in prison for sending nudes to 16-year-old student and inviting him over for sex while her husband was away

Excerpts:

by Martha Williams
October 26, 2023

A female teacher allegedly sent nudes to a 16-year-old student and then invited him over for sex while her husband was out of town.

Rikki Lynn Laughlin, 24, sent the explicit photos to the boy at St. James High School in Missouri  – where Laughlin worked as a special education teacher, according to Maries County Sheriff Department.

The married mother-of-one faces six felony charges for allegedly pursuing the 16-year-old, sending him pornographic images and soliciting photos from him.

Laughlin married Grant Laughlin, 23, in June 2022 and the pair have a one-year-old daughter.

Wagner’s Response to TGC’s Morris’s Review of “Non Toxic Masculinity” – and Morris is Incorrect About Singleness, Among Other Issues

Wagner’s Response to TGC’s Morris’s Review of “Non Toxic Masculinity” – and Morris is Incorrect About Singleness, Among Other Issues

TGC is the same group that brought us all that cringe, weird book about sex called “Beautiful Union,” whose author claimed that sex can point us all to God, which is a disaster for those of us over 30 who are still virgins and living celibately.

I had a few comments I wanted to make below this:

(Link):  A Response to Shane Morris’s TGC Review of Non-Toxic Masculinity

Excerpts:

[The review that Wagner is responding to is located here, on TGC’s site: Sexual Ethics Is More than Not Being Evil]

by Zachary Wagner

…I want to note some of my ongoing disappointment with The Gospel Coalition on their engagement with issues of sexuality, gender, and masculinity.

…For many of my friends who have left Christianity, the straw that broke the camel’s back was not merely that Christianity was sexually restrictive. It was the hypocrisy of those who condemned the culture’s sexual permissiveness while indulging in sexual sin themselves or excusing it on the part of Christian leaders and heroes.

…In particular, the juxtaposition between purity culture on the one hand and sexual scandal on the other has opened a floodgate of apostasy for Millennials in particular, including members of my family and many very dear friends. How should evangelical pastors respond to this? Morris has little to say on this point, but he seems to imply that defending purity culture and doubling down on its good intentions is the correct approach. …

This is pastorally irresponsible. Parents, pastors, and authors were the ones who should have known better, not teenagers with raging hormones and half-developed brains. The sons and daughters of purity culture have repeatedly been told that they were the problem. Any suffering or frustration or confusion they experienced was their fault, a result of their sinful and broken inclinations.

Four Friends Who Drugged Their Wives and Watched as They Raped Each Others’ Partners Now Face Jail

Four Friends Who Drugged Their Wives and Watched as They Raped Each Others’ Partners Now Face Jail

This is beyond wicked. It is beyond depraved.

And let this go to show that my fellow conservatives are in very deep, grave error in combatting anti-nuclear family, anti-marriage rhetoric by progressives by perpetuating falsehoods about the benefits of marriage.

Contrary to what most “family values” conservatives argue, marriage does not make every person who marries (or who becomes a parent) more ethical, godly, loving, or responsible.

The Bible does not teach that being married heals sin, or that marriage (or being a parent) stops a person from sinning.

The Bible teaches the only “cure” for sin is acceptance of Jesus as Lord and Savior.

Some of the men charged with raped mentioned in the article below also have biological children with those wives; these men are fathers, but parenthood did not make them more godly, mature, loving, or ethical.

Let such news stories also go to show that God is not with-holding spouses from single adults who don’t meet certain criteria. Contrary to what some teaching by Christians about marriage says, a person doesn’t have to be godly, perfect, or wonderful to “merit” a spouse from God.

God is allowing all kinds of trashy, disgusting, perverts to marry, like the men in the article below.

(Link): Four friends who drugged their wives and watched as they raped each others’ partners now face jail in Singapore

Nov 3, 2022
by James Callery

Four friends who drugged their wives, watched as they raped each others’ partners and congratulated each other for ‘putting on a good show’ face jail in Singapore.

One woman was raped several times over a period of at least seven years by different men while unconscious, having been drugged and blindfolded by her husband, Channel News Asia reports.

The case came about when the woman found naked pictures of herself in a chat on her husband’s phone.

The four men, who are under gag orders placed by the court, pleaded guilty on Monday to two charges each of conspiracy to rape, with various other charges taken into consideration.

They are K, M, L and N.

According to Channel News Asia, the main accomplice linked to their cases is a fifth man, J, who married his wife in 2008 and with whom he has four children.

Cop Named Detective of the Year, Who Is a Married Father, Only Gets a Misdemeanor Charge After Sending Sexually Explicit Messages to Someone He Thought Was a 14- Year- Old Girl

Cop Named Detective of the Year, Who Is a Married Father, Only Gets a Misdemeanor Charge After Sending Sexually Explicit Messages to Someone He Thought Was a 14- Year- Old Girl

This is a news story about a married guy who has a child of his own who was caught trying to engage in sex acts with someone he believed to be a teen girl – marriage does not make a person  more ethical, godly, loving, responsible, or moral.

Married people are destroying marriage all on their own, with no help from progressives.

That deviants like this man get married goes to show that common Christian teachings about marriage – at least in the content I saw when growing up years ago – is false; one does not have to become perfect, or improve themselves in some way, before God will grant the person a spouse or allow them to get married.

If God is permitting perverts like this man to get married, rest assured, he’s more than likely not with-holding a spouse from you over far lesser sins or mistakes.

This also belies the common misperception by Christians that married sex is so great and mind-blowing that married people won’t commit sexual sin. Despite being married, this married guy was trying to find a way to have sex with a 14 year old girl… obviously, being married doesn’t make a person immune from sexual sin.

(Link): California ‘Detective of the Year’ busted for sending sexually explicit messages in child sex sting

A veteran police officer who was named “Detective of the Year” in 2019 was charged with exchanging sexually explicit messages with someone he thought was a 14-year-old girl.

(Link): ‘Detective of the year’ accused of sending graphic messages to girl he believed was 14

(Link): One-Time ‘Detective Of The Year’ Allegedly Sent Sexual Messages To Woman He Thought Was A Child

(Link): California cop named ‘Detective of the Year’ only gets a misdemeanor charge after sending sexually explicit messages to someone he thought was a 14-year-old girl

August 3, 2022
by Melissa Koenig

A California cop who was once heralded as a Detective of the Year is now facing a misdemeanor charge after he allegedly sexted someone he thought was a 14-year-old girl.

Gregory Daniel Beaumarchais, 43, a married father of one, faces a maximum sentence of one year in prison on a misdemeanor charge of annoying or molesting a victim believed to be under the age of 18.

He will also have to register as a sex offender if convicted.

Authorities say the Santa Ana officer exchanged sexually explicit messages with someone posing as a 14-year-old girl on social media from December 2021 through January 2022.

Mom Dumped in Son’s Hockey Bag Allegedly Had Affair With Handyman Accused of Killing Her: Police

Mom Dumped in Son’s Hockey Bag Allegedly Had Affair With Handyman Accused of Killing Her: Police 

Not saying this woman ‘deserved’ to be murdered by this guy she had the affair with, but if she hadn’t have had an affair, maybe this would not have happened to her.

So… does being married make a person immune from sexual sin? Why no, it does not. Does being married make a person more godly, responsible, or ethical (as many hyper pro marriage advocates teach, such as Al Mohler and Brad Wilcox)? Nope, it does not.

This news story, and ones like it, also betray a common Christian teaching that married sex is so totally awesome (especially if you wait until marriage to have sex) that you will never, ever seek sex outside the marriage. Obviously, that is not so, because I frequently see news stories of married people who commit adultery.

I do feel very bad for her children – they will be without a mother now.

(Link):  David Bonola, suspected handyman lover, charged in Orsolya Gaal murder

April 21, 2022

The handyman lover of Queens mom Orsolya Gaal was charged Thursday with her murder – and police said he committed the “horrendous” crime during a fight her over their recently-ended on-off affair of two years.

David Bonola, 44, was already on the NYPD’s radar Wednesday evening when officers canvassing for surveillance video spotted him near the crime scene and took him back to the 112th precinct.

There, Bonola made “incriminating statements” about the slaying, NYPD Chief of Detectives James Essig said at a press conference.

He was charged with murder, criminal tampering and criminal possession of a weapon for allegedly stabbing Gaal, 51, nearly 60 times in the basement of her Forest Hills home with a kitchen knife early on Saturday, cops said.

…Bonola, who cops said has no prior arrests, was “a handyman who was employed by Mrs. Gaal” for about two years — and during that time they had “an intimate affair,” Essig revealed Thursday.

They had re-sparked their on-off affair earlier this month, just to break up again — and Bonola “came back … to speak about the relationship again,” added Chief Julie Morrill, who led the investigation.

(Link): Mom dumped in son’s hockey bag allegedly had affair with handyman accused of killing her: Police

Orsolya Gaal, 51, was stabbed dozens of times, according to police.

by Emily Shapiro

A New York City mother found stabbed to death inside a duffel bag was allegedly killed by a handyman she’d been having an off-and-on affair with for two years, the NYPD said.

The suspect, David Bonola, was arrested just before 1 a.m. Thursday, days after he allegedly dumped Orsolya Gaal‘s body in her son’s hockey bag, police said at a news conference Thursday.