Why Are Marriage Rates Down? Study Blames Lack Of ‘Economically-Attractive’ Men

Why Are Marriage Rates Down? Study Blames Lack Of ‘Economically-Attractive’ Men

(Link): Marriage rates down due to a shortage of ’economically attractive’ men 

Sept 2019

Sorry, guys, women are not saying “I do” because you’re not making enough dough.

It’s even worse for African-Americans.

According to a new (Link): study by Cornell University professors cited by the National Council on Family Relation’s Journal of Marriage and Family, one reason marriage rates are down nationwide is because prospective husbands can’t provide enough financial security.

Continue reading “Why Are Marriage Rates Down? Study Blames Lack Of ‘Economically-Attractive’ Men”

Supposedly Woman-Honoring and Pro-Marriage Focus On the Family Group Wants Wives to Blame Themselves If or When Their Husbands Commit Adultery – Re: Book: ‘How God Used the Other Woman,’ by Tina Konkin

Supposedly Woman-Honoring and Pro-Marriage Focus On the Family Group Wants Wives to Blame Themselves If or When Their Husbands Commit Adultery – Re: Book: ‘How God Used the Other Woman,’ by Tina Konkin

I have some new developments in my personal life that have kept me busy the last month or two, which is why I’ve not been blogging as often.

During this time, I do recall seeing comments on other people’s blogs and on Twitter, about some idiotic, sexist, stupid book that “Focus On The Family” was recommending or selling.

Here is a page about the book by Tina Konkin that created an uproar:

(Link): How God Used “the Other Woman”: Saving Your Marriage After Infidelity via Focus On The Family site

Excerpts about that book from the site:

In How God Used “the Other Woman,” Konkin shares how she and her husband Ron saved their marriage after his affair and fought to make it better than ever before.
——

I am horrified to see that this Tina Konkin works as (or claims to be) (Link): a “relationship expert.”

This awful book of hers is also being sold at Wal-Mart.

From what I can recall, it’s a book for Christian wives that tells them how to approach their husband or their marriage if and whenever their husband should commit adultery,
and their view is that you, you Christian wife, should blame yourself for  your husband’s adultery, don’t hold him accountable, and just write off the situation as a learning experience.

Below you will find a few links or videos to work by other people refuting such a disgusting viewpoint.

Before I get to those resources, though, I wanted to point out how utterly hypocritical these conservative secular and conservative Christian groups are, who proclaim they respect women, and marriage, and The Nuclear Family. Continue reading “Supposedly Woman-Honoring and Pro-Marriage Focus On the Family Group Wants Wives to Blame Themselves If or When Their Husbands Commit Adultery – Re: Book: ‘How God Used the Other Woman,’ by Tina Konkin”

Dear Prudence, Help! I’m Glad My Awful Husband Is Dead.

Dear Prudence: Help! I’m Glad My Awful Husband Is Dead.

(Link): Dear Prudence: Help! I’m Glad My Awful Husband Is Dead.

August 19, 2019

Question.
Happy: I am a 38-year-old widow. The day my husband died was the happiest day of my life.

He was a miserable, vindictive man whose greatest joy was tearing me down.

He cheated on me constantly and would cheerfully recount all my inadequacies compared with his mistresses.

If I left, he would “pursue me to the ends of the earth.”

He never hit me, for what it is worth. At the end, I was isolated and alone; my only social outlet was my family. They all knew how horrible my marriage was, which is what makes their reaction now more hurtful.

I am going to travel. I am going to visit exotic places, drink wine, and learn a foreign language.

I have enough money to be quite comfortable for the rest of my life.

I would rather shoot myself than ever get married again.

Continue reading “Dear Prudence, Help! I’m Glad My Awful Husband Is Dead.”

Christian Rock Star Arrested In Connection With Child Sex Assault Probe Before Going on Stage

Christian Rock Star Arrested In Connection With Child Sex Assault Probe Before Going on Stage

The article says that this Christian rock star has a son. So, this guy is a father. I would assume that the rock star was married at one point (unless he had his son out of wedlock).

I point this out to say that a lot of conservative Christians and conservative secular think tanks keep arguing that “family values” and being “pro marriage” and people having children will somehow “fix” the United States. No, it won’t.

First of all, no passage in the Bible argues that the way to “fix” culture is to have more marriage and more natalism – chapter seven in 1 Corinthians actually says it is better to remain single than it is to marry. The Bible says a person must be changed by accepting Jesus as her savior, not by getting married and having kids. The Bible doesn’t talk about cleaning up culture.

Secondly, personal observation. There are way too many married people with children we all know, or have read about who are selfish, rapists, child molesters, or into selling drugs and what all (see some examples of that on this blog (Link): here and (Link): here).

Marriage and parenthood are not guarantees of making a person more mature, ethical, godly, principled, and responsible – but conservatives keep arguing otherwise, and it’s a highly deceitful and unbiblical argument for them to continue to advance.

Please see the bottom of this post for more remarks by me.

(Link): Christian Rock Star Arrested In Connection With Child Sex Assault Probe Before Going on Stage

Excerpts:

By BRIAN NIEMIETZ
NEW YORK DAILY NEWS |
AUG 14, 2019 | 2:48 PM

A Christian rocker had to cancel his performance at eastern Minnesota’s Wood City Music Festival after Cloquet, Minn., cops arrested him on two charges of felony sex assault against a child, according to an ABC News affiliate in Duluth.

Continue reading “Christian Rock Star Arrested In Connection With Child Sex Assault Probe Before Going on Stage”

Don’t Settle for Crumbs: Hope for Christian Singles (video)

Don’t Settle for Crumbs: Hope for Christian Singles

Why a Woman’s Sex Life Declines After Menopause (Hint: Sometimes It’s Her Partner) By T. Parker-Pope

Why a Woman’s Sex Life Declines After Menopause (Hint: Sometimes It’s Her Partner) By T. Parker-Pope

(Link): Why a Woman’s Sex Life Declines After Menopause (Hint: Sometimes It’s Her Partner)

Excerpts:

By Tara Parker-Pope
August 2019

A revealing new analysis gives voice to the many reasons a woman’s sex life often falters with age.

For many women, sex after menopause is not as satisfying as it used to be. But is menopause entirely to blame?

New research suggests that the hormonal changes that come with menopause are only part of the reason a woman’s sex life declines with age. It’s true that many women experience symptoms after menopause, including vaginal dryness, painful intercourse and loss of desire — all of which can affect the frequency and pleasure of sex.

But the new study shows that the reasons many women stop wanting sex, enjoying sex and having sex are far more complex.

While women traditionally have been blamed when sex wanes in a relationship, the research shows that, often, it’s the health of a woman’s partner that determines whether she remains sexually active and satisfied with her sex life.

(Most studies have focused entirely on heterosexual women, so less is known about same-sex couples after menopause.)

Continue reading “Why a Woman’s Sex Life Declines After Menopause (Hint: Sometimes It’s Her Partner) By T. Parker-Pope”

Family Values Won’t Stop Mass Shootings – Lawmaker Who Blamed Dayton Massacre on Same-Sex Marriage and Break Down of the Family Urged by GOP Leader to Resign

Family Values Won’t Stop Mass Shootings – Lawmaker Who Blamed Dayton Massacre on Same-Sex Marriage and Break Down of the Family Urged by GOP Leader to Resign

I’m a conservative person and was a life-long Republican until 2014/2015. So, I’m certainly not a left wing, family- or family-values hating person.

However, I do believe that other conservatives over-estimate the importance of, or the effects of, the nuclear family, marriage, and “family values.”

I have (Link): plenty of examples on my blog of self-professing, God-fearing “family men,” who even tout family values, who do things like rape children or beat their wives.

Even if every one in our nation was married with children, and professed belief in Christ, we’d still continue to have sin – we’d have mass shootings, rapes, and the like.

Granted, if people were sincere about following Christ and his teachings, maybe some of those things would decline, but I don’t believe any of those things would give us a crime-free society.

The Bible doesn’t say any where the marriage, the nuclear family, and (Link): being a parent will make people into better, more ethical people. The Bible points people to Christ, not to marriage or pro-creation.

Family values, the family unit, marriage, and natalism have not stopped men from raping children and beating their wives – again, I have plenty examples on my blog of married men who are fathers to children who have been arrested for raping their own children, selling their own children to other men for sex, for beating and murdering their wives (see here and here).

And, by the way, I don’t think video games or homosexual marriage causes mass shootings, either. This lady is wrong.

(Link): Ohio lawmaker blames mass shootings on open borders, homosexuality, video games

Excerpts:

Candice Keller is a Republican state representative from Middletown, a small city 30 miles south of Dayton, where a gunman killed at least nine people and wounded 27 others early Sunday. In a now-deleted Facebook post, she wrote: “After every mass shooting, the liberals start the blame game. Why not place the blame where it belongs?”

 The post listed reasons Keller thought the United States is grappling with mass shootings, including “the breakdown of the traditional American family,”… Continue reading “Family Values Won’t Stop Mass Shootings – Lawmaker Who Blamed Dayton Massacre on Same-Sex Marriage and Break Down of the Family Urged by GOP Leader to Resign”

Aspiring Pastor Drowns on Honeymoon in Florida: ‘3 Days of Wedded Bliss Turned into a Nightmare

Aspiring Pastor Drowns on Honeymoon in Florida: ‘3 Days of Wedded Bliss Turned into a Nightmare

I have several news stories similar to this on my blog: people who marry, but within minutes or hours or days, one or both married people are dead.

This goes to show that marriage is not a guarantee of lifelong companionship, stability, or happiness, as so many marriage-promoting conservative Christian and secular groups depict it as being.

(Link): Aspiring Pastor Drowns on Honeymoon in Florida: ‘3 Days of Wedded Bliss Turned into a Nightmare

August 2019

After three short days of “wedded bliss” a young Iowa woman went from bride to widow after her husband tragically drowned while on their honeymoon.

Continue reading “Aspiring Pastor Drowns on Honeymoon in Florida: ‘3 Days of Wedded Bliss Turned into a Nightmare”

Thoughts Regarding ‘Both Purity Culture and Hook-Up Culture Failed Me’ by A. Murrish

Thoughts Regarding ‘Both Purity Culture and Hook-Up Culture Failed Me’ by A. Murrish

First, here is a link to the page I will be discussing:

(Link): Both Purity Culture and Hook-Up Culture Failed Me

I don’t care for this editorial.

For one thing it sort of spiritualizes the status of singleness, which is grating to any adult over the age of 35, who had hoped to marry, but is still single.

Next, the author points to the church as a solution for singles.

She is essentially telling marriage-desiring singles to lose themselves in church, to find belonging in church groups.

The problem with this is that for many never-married adults (and some divorced and widowed) over the age of 30, most churches either ignore adult singles, or they insult adult singles, because they are too preoccupied with promoting marriage and catering to the needs of married couples.

Continue reading “Thoughts Regarding ‘Both Purity Culture and Hook-Up Culture Failed Me’ by A. Murrish”

Matt Walsh V. Marriage Idolaters Such as Bradford Wilcox and Mark Regnerus

Matt Walsh V. Marriage Idolaters Such as Bradford Wilcox and Mark Regnerus

So, hyper conservative Matt Walsh tweeted this out in regards to a lady (I think she’s a model or actress? – her name is Julianne Hough) who says after she married her husband (who is a biological man) that she is “not straight” (which I assume means she is attracted to women – as well as to men(?)).

Here is Walsh’s tweet on the matter:

Oh so she lied to her husband and married him under false pretenses. What an inspiration.
—-

I’ve been a conservative for the duration of my life, but conservatives (who usually claim to be “Pro Family” and “Pro Marriage”) are often hypocritical about these topics, or hold some pretty odd, troubling views.

Many conservatives, especially ones who promote Male Headship Complementarianism, and the ones who are members of pro-family organizations and think tanks – such as Bradford Wilcox of the Institute For Family Studies – promote marriage at the expense of singleness (they regularly slam, insult, and put down singleness), or they promote some unethical, unbiblical views, as I’ve outlined in previous posts on my blog.

Continue reading “Matt Walsh V. Marriage Idolaters Such as Bradford Wilcox and Mark Regnerus”

I Called Off My Engagement. I Didn’t Feel God’s Peace. by L. Wilbert

I Called Off My Engagement. I Didn’t Feel God’s Peace. by L. Wilbert

I’m not sure I agree completely with this editorial, which I have linked to and excerpted further below. I think it over-spiritualizes things.

When I was engaged, I didn’t feel God’s peace of lack thereof. I had to decide for myself if the guy I was engaged to was right or not. After several years together, I prayed for guidance, because I didn’t know if I should stay or go.

I never did get any guidance from God, not even when I was praying hardest. I ultimately had to make up my own mind.

I really wish that Christians would stop offering this view that if one just trusts God, that God will direct one’s life choices (such as if to marry a certain person or not).

God has never, ever guided me – not when I was engaged, not when I was in my twenties and asking God which college major and career I should pursue. I never felt God’s peace, nor did I feel God saying, “No” to any of those things (and I didn’t feel or hear God saying, “Yes,” either).

I think this article below is just as bad as those articles by Christians who claim God “led them” to their spouse, like the lady who says God sent her a spouse when she went for a walk on the beach (see links about all that at the bottom of this post, under “related”).

Sometimes, the Spirit is going to remain totally silent – the Spirit is not going to give you his blessing or with-hold it.

(Link): I Called Off My Engagement. I Didn’t Feel God’s Peace. by L. Wilbert

Excerpts:

Looking for the right fit in a spouse is often less important than praying for the Spirit’s blessing.

Continue reading “I Called Off My Engagement. I Didn’t Feel God’s Peace. by L. Wilbert”

The War Over Marriage Is Raging; Single People Are Winning by B. DePaulo

The War Over Marriage Is Raging; Single People Are Winning by B. DePaulo

(Link):  The War Over Marriage Is Raging; Single People Are Winning

Excerpts:

Once again, the claim that marriage is greedy has people riled up

July 11, 2019

To everyone who has been rooting for, and working on, the telling of a more accurate and affirming story about single people, and the shattering of myths about married people, there is good news: We are winning.

Continue reading “The War Over Marriage Is Raging; Single People Are Winning by B. DePaulo”

Pastor’s Wife Charged With Sexually Assaulting Student by L. Blair

Pastor’s Wife Charged With Sexually Assaulting Student by L. Blair

Do Marriage and Parenthood, as so many pro-Nuclear Family Christians and conservative think tanks suggest, improve people or make society better, or cause individuals to become more godly, ethical, responsible, and loving? Nope. Here’s another example.

(Link): Pastor’s Wife Charged With Sexually Assaulting Student

Excerpts:

By Leonardo Blair, Christian Post Reporter

A pastor’s wife and teacher from Burbank, Illinois, has been arrested and charged after she allegedly supplied alcohol to a 15-year-old student at Jordan Baptist School, a ministry of Jordan Baptist Church, and had sex with him at least five times before it was legal for her to do so.

Continue reading “Pastor’s Wife Charged With Sexually Assaulting Student by L. Blair”

Deviant Father Who Raped His Screaming One Year Old Infant Daughter for Dark Web Jailed

Deviant Father Who Raped His Screaming One Year Old Infant Daughter for Dark Web Jailed

Do Marriage and Parenthood, as so many pro-Nuclear Family Christians and conservative think tanks suggest, improve people or make society better, or cause individuals to become more godly, ethical, responsible, and loving? Nope. Here’s another example.

Did being married and being a father cause this man to behave in a loving, godly, ethical, responsible manner? Why no, it did not.

Also, ask yourself this: is this guy perfect? No, obviously he is not perfect. Yet, growing up, I often read in Christian content about singleness that if one wants to marry one day, that one must become perfect, or a really great and morally upstanding person if one wanted to be granted a spouse by God.

Obviously, such teaching is total bunk, seeing as how many examples I have on this blog of people who did get a spouse but later went on to be arrested for pedophilia, murder, or God knows what else.

If there is a deity, that deity obviously does not with-hold a spouse from people if they are not “perfect,” since that deity is permitting dirt-bags to marry.

(Link): Deviant Father Who Raped His Screaming One Year Old Infant Daughter for Dark Web Jailed

Jimmy McCloskey
Friday 12 Jul 2019

James Lockhart, 31, received the maximum sentence possible at a court hearing Thursday for producing the four videos between March 2016 and February 2018.

Harrowing court documents said that during at least one of the clips, the young victim ‘continues to scream and cry’ as she is sexually assaulted by her father.

Continue reading “Deviant Father Who Raped His Screaming One Year Old Infant Daughter for Dark Web Jailed”

Twisted Rapist Dad ‘Not Satisfied With Sex Attacks’ Turned Into Serial Killer

Twisted Rapist Dad ‘Not Satisfied With Sex Attacks’ Turned Into Serial Killer

Do Marriage and Parenthood, as so many pro-Nuclear Family Christians and conservative think tanks suggest, improve people or make society better, or cause individuals to become more godly, ethical, responsible, and loving? Nope. Here’s another example.

(Link): Twisted Rapist Dad ‘Not Satisfied With Sex Attacks’ Turned Into Serial Killer

Excerpts:

William Choyce raped and murdered three women and sexually attacked several others – he is now on death row

William Choyce seemed like the perfect, middle-class family man – but he was hiding a dark secret behind his respectable facade.

To the outside world, he looked like the perfect husband and father but Choyce is hiding a sinister sexual deviation.

Crime+Investigation’s I Lived With A Killer examines what drove a seemingly devoted dad and partner to become a serial rapist and murder .

Growing up in “good” family, Choyce wanted for little and along with his parents, went along to church every Sunday.

Continue reading “Twisted Rapist Dad ‘Not Satisfied With Sex Attacks’ Turned Into Serial Killer”

Study Says More American Couples Meet Online and in Bars Now than Through Family, Friends (2019)

Study Says More American Couples Meet Online and in Bars Now than Through Family, Friends (2019)

I think it’s sad, frustrating, and unfortunate for Christian singles who’d like to marry that so many churches and Christians do NOT want to take practical steps to help marriage-desiring singles to get married.

And as this study shows, when that happens, when friends, family, and church community refuse to get involved, people use bars and dating sites.

I don’t understand the Christians who promote the “Equally Yoked” rule and yet won’t help Christian singles who’d like to marry – if you’re an “Equally Yoked” advocate (I am not one), wouldn’t you want to ensure that your Christian single friend marries another Christian, rather than take her chances and dates Non-Christians she meets on dating sites and at night clubs?

(Link): Our Deepest Fears Realized: Most Couples Meet Online Now

Meeting online is trending upward, and fewer and fewer people are meeting at work, school, or through friends or family.

Continue reading “Study Says More American Couples Meet Online and in Bars Now than Through Family, Friends (2019)”

Mother of a Two-Day-Old Baby That Was Burned To Death as Part of a Satanic Ritual Has Been Caught by Police (Child’s Father Also Involved in Baby’s Murder)

Mother of a Two-Day-Old Baby That Was Burned To Death as Part of a Satanic Ritual Has Been Caught by Police (Child’s Father Also Involved in Baby’s Murder)

In light of the appearance of news stories such as this one (link below), I never again want to hear Christians or “pro family” propaganda organizations acting as though single or child-free or childless adults are “less” than married people who have children.

I never again want to see their pro-Nuclear Family, pro-Marriage propaganda spewed, where they frequently argue or suggest that marriage (or parenthood) makes (and is necessary to make) people more godly, responsible, mature, and ethical.

(Link): MOTHER OF BABY BURNED TO DEATH IN SATANIC RITUAL ARRESTED AFTER TWO YEARS ON THE RUN

Excerpts:

July 2019
by A. Joyner

The mother of a two-day-old baby that was burned to death as part of a satanic ritual has been apprehended by police after evading capture for two years.

Continue reading “Mother of a Two-Day-Old Baby That Was Burned To Death as Part of a Satanic Ritual Has Been Caught by Police (Child’s Father Also Involved in Baby’s Murder)”

What Christians Really Think About the Church’s Relationship Advice by Anna Broadway

What Christians Really Think About the Church’s Relationship Advice by Anna Broadway

The following article (book review) from Christianity Today covers several topics about singleness and the church I’ve been pointing out on this blog for literally years now.

One big point it brings up that I have: there are more single Christian women in the church than there are single Christian men. This means if a Christian single female insists upon following the “equally yoked” rule (that states a Christian may only marry another Christian), she will remain single.

If you are a single Christian woman who desires marriage, it is imperative you ditch the ‘equally yoked’ rule. You must learn to judge men based on their character, not what their stated religious beliefs are.

(Link): What Christians Really Think About the Church’s Relationship Advice by Anna Broadway

Excerpts:

New survey research sheds light on how believers navigate the stickier matters of dating and marriage.

July 10, 2019

Over the years, Christians have produced and read far more books on how relationships and singleness should work than on how these things actuallydo pan out. Vicky Walker’s new book Relatable: Exploring God, Love, & Connection in the Age of Choice, based on a survey of more than 1,400 people, aims to change that.

Walker writes from a more-or-less Protestant British perspective, but American Christians will find much they recognize.

Over the course of 12 chapters and several appendices, Relatable covers everything from the history of marriage to typical teachings on gender roles to, of course, sex. But she also gets into stickier matters like the role of technology and the church’s significant sex-ratio gap—the latter a topic that raises questions of dating outside the faith.

Continue reading “What Christians Really Think About the Church’s Relationship Advice by Anna Broadway”

Mom and Dad ‘Fantasized About Raping Their Own Unborn Baby’ by Debbie White

Mom and Dad ‘Fantasized About Raping Their Own Unborn Baby’ by Debbie White

Ah, tell me again, Southern Baptist talking head Al Mohler and other conservative Christians and secular conservatives how parenthood supposedly makes people more godly, responsible, giving, self-less, and ethical, especially in light of headlines such as this one.

(Link): Mom and Dad ‘Fantasized About Raping Their Own Unborn Baby’

Excerpts:

July 8, 2019

A MUM and dad “fantasised about committing incest with their unborn baby” after sexually assaulting their two-year-old daughter, horrific court papers reveal.

Gerrad Coddington, 25, and Christina Nelson-Coddington, 29, allegedly handcuffed, beat and raped the toddler, says an affidavit lodged in Oklahoma, US.

Continue reading “Mom and Dad ‘Fantasized About Raping Their Own Unborn Baby’ by Debbie White”

What You Lose When You Gain a Spouse – What if marriage is not the social good that so many believe and want it to be? by M. Catron

What You Lose When You Gain a Spouse

What if marriage is not the social good that so many believe and want it to be? by M. Catron

This is similar to a study that came out a few years ago that I blogged about, where researches dubbed marriages “Greedy Marriages,” because when people get married, they tend to turn inwards and ignore neighbors and family members (single adults generally do not do this, according to the study).

(Link): What You Lose When You Gain a Spouse

Excerpts:

July 2019

In America today, it’s easy to believe that marriage is a social good—that our lives and our communities are better when more people get and stay married.

There have, of course, been massive changes to the institution over the past few generations, leading the occasional cultural critic to ask: Is marriage becoming obsolete? But few of these people seem genuinely interested in the answer.

More often the question functions as a kind of rhetorical sleight of hand, a way of stirring up moral panic about changing family values or speculating about whether society has become too cynical for love.

In popular culture, the sentiment still prevails that marriage makes us happy and divorce leaves us lonely, and that never getting married at all is a fundamental failure of belonging.

But speculation about whether or not marriage is obsolete overlooks a more important question: What is lost by making marriage the most central relationship in a culture?

Continue reading “What You Lose When You Gain a Spouse – What if marriage is not the social good that so many believe and want it to be? by M. Catron”