The Rhetoric of Singleness Blog – Links, Comments, Thoughts

The Rhetoric of Singleness Blog

Warning: I discovered through further reading that the author of the blog is a complementarian. I disagree with complementarianism; more on that below.

Had I known from the start she is a complementarian, I may not have started composing this post. I am leery of pointing anyone to a complementarian resource, but here we are.


As of today, I see only a small number of posts on the The Rhetoric of Singleness blog, dating from April 2017, and this blog appears to be from a Christian perspective – but then, her blog does not display a list or pull down menu of all her posts.

Even though the blog looks to be on hiatus, I’ll link to it on the off chance the blogger resumes writing again.

The person behind this blog says she’s single, in her 30s, and has yet to marry but would like to.

(Link): The Rhetoric of Singleness Blog – main page

Some of the only posts I am seeing on this blog include:

(Link): Pursuing Marriage

In that “Pursuing Marriage” post, she says she is a believer in gender complementarianism.

For example, here’s part of what she writes:

So, what options does that leave me, a woman with a complementary view of gender roles, of pursuing marriage? I know for some women who see no options left to them there is a strong temptation to bitterness, resentment, and to denigrate our single brothers who are called by God to the leadership role in the pursuit of marriage.

// end excerpt

Oh no. I (Link): used to be a complementarian myself but ditched it by my mid 30s.

I heard all the same stuff from conservative Christians growing up, as this other blogger likely did, such as, how (Link): men are supposed to be the heads in marriages, God supposedly created women pretty much to exist (Link): only to wait on menand so on.

(And I remained a conservative, even after I realized that complementarianism is false and actually quite sexist – it doesn’t just teach that men and women “complement” one another but that there should be a male hierarchy, of men ruling over women.

Contrary to what complementarians would have you believe, abandoning gender complementarianism will not turn you into a left wing, abortion-supporting, man-hating feminist. I am still right wing, even after leaving complementarianism.)

I am no longer a complementarian, but can pin point complementarianism, among a few other things, as being (Link): one reason as to why I am in my 40s and never got married.

Continue reading “The Rhetoric of Singleness Blog – Links, Comments, Thoughts”

One Foot in Christianity, One Foot in Agnosticism – In a Faith Crisis

One Foot in Christianity, One Foot in Agnosticism  – In a Faith Crisis

November 2016. (There is a moderate amount of swear words in the post below)

Some of the points in the post, in brief (the long explanation is below):

  • I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior before I was ten years old
  • I have read the entire Bible.
  • I spent many years reading books ABOUT the Bible (e.g., books about its formation and history)
  • I spent years reading Christian apologetic literature
    – so do NOT tell me that I “do not understand Christianity” or that I was “never a REAL Christian to start with”
  • I currently have doubts about the Christian faith and/or aspects of the Bible
  • I have not rejected Jesus Christ Himself
    (he’s pretty much Christianity’s only good feature or selling point, as far as I can see at this point)
  • I am not an atheist
  • I am not a Charismatic
  • I am not a “Word of Faither”
  • I was brought up under conservative, Southern Baptist and evangelical teachings and churches
  • Even though conservative Christians claim to believe in the Bible, they
    • cannot agree on what the Bible means or how to apply it – this is a huge problem as I see it in the faith
    • they diminish the role of the Holy Spirit or deny Him and that He can work for Christians today, because they are “hyper sola scriptura” and have reduced the Trinity to “Father, Son, and Holy Bible,” (this is also problematic),
      they usually do this because they are hyper-cessationist and paranoid or hateful of Charismatic teachings or practices
    • they teach that most to all of the biblical promises are not for Christians today but are only for the Jews of 5,000 years ago, there-by teaching that the Bible is NOT relevant for people today  (this is also problematic)
  • If you are a Christian, do not act like a smug dick about any of this and immediately disregard any points I have to make about God, the Bible, or other topics, because in your view, I am a “Non-Christian who was ‘never’ really saved” -not to mention, that is not even true.
    I was in fact “truly” saved, and I am / was, a “real” Christian.
  • No, I don’t want to enumerate a detailed list of reasons why I have doubts about God, the Bible, or the faith.If I were to provide such a list or explanation, your average Christian would only want to debate each and every point to argue me back into fully believing. (A witnessing tip to Christians: doing that sort of thing is NOT an effective way of “winning back a lost sheep to Jesus.”)

DETAILED EXPLANATION

I find that people who are both Christian and Non-Christian (and several other categories of people I bump into on Twitter and other sites) get frustrated when they cannot easily box me in.

People seem to be more comfortable with labels, but I’m not sure what label I would give myself these days.

I have briefly tried to explain my current religious beliefs on my Twitter bio, and I explain them a little more on my blog’s “About” page and have mentioned them in a post or two over the course of the last few years I’ve been blogging here.

Here is my background:

I accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior prior to turning the age of ten.

That means: I believed that Jesus took my sins upon himself, he was without sin, he paid the price for my sins, and was raised from the dead three days after having been crucified – and if I believe in all that, if I put “saving faith in” Jesus (as opposed to mere intellectual assent), my sins have been forgiven by God, and I go to heaven when I die.

I read the entire Bible through when I was 18 years old, and afterwards, I read a lot of the Bible in the years after. Prior to that age, I had read portions of the Bible when younger.

Continue reading “One Foot in Christianity, One Foot in Agnosticism – In a Faith Crisis”

Evangelical Russell Moore Criticizes Other Conservative Christians For Supporting Sexually Smarmy Donald Trump but Moore Has Attacked Adult Virginity

Evangelical Russell Moore Criticizes Other Conservative Christians For Supporting Sexually Smarmy Donald Trump but Moore Has Attacked Adult Virginity

In the midst of the current election season, we have some conservative Christians who are upset with other conservative Christians for supporting Republican nominee Donald Trump.

The media have been reporting around the clock the last couple of weeks with all sorts of allegations that Trump has groped women and so on. In spite of some of this questionable to clearly sexist behavior, some conservative Christians have spoken up to defend Trump in public, which really angers Russell Moore.

Considering that Moore has criticized adult, Christian virgins in the past (see this post and this post), I find it pretty rich that he wrote an editorial, which was carried by the Washington Post recently, criticizing other Christians for not supporting biblical sexual ethics in light of Donald Trump’s smarmy behavior towards women.

I have additional commentary below this long excerpt:

(Link): If Donald Trump has done anything, he has snuffed out the Religious Right by Russell Moore

Excerpts:

…Journalist Mark Halperin (Link): noted this weekend that virtually all of the “reaffirmation of support” for Trump, following the disclosure of his sexually predatory recorded comments, were from religious conservative leaders. This is a scandal and a disgrace, but it should not be a surprise.

…We know nothing new about Donald Trump. He has told us about his view of women, his view of sexuality, his views of marriage and family for more than 30 years. He has gloried in reality television decadence before reality television was even invented, in his boasts to tabloid reporters. He reaffirmed who he is over and over again, even during this campaign — from misogynistic statements to racist invective to crazed conspiracy theorizing.

And yet here stands the old-guard Religious Right establishment. Some are defending or waving this away, with the same old tropes they’ve used throughout this campaign.

Continue reading “Evangelical Russell Moore Criticizes Other Conservative Christians For Supporting Sexually Smarmy Donald Trump but Moore Has Attacked Adult Virginity”

Revolting Attitudes Towards Abused Wives From a Southern Baptist Seminary Student – Southern Baptists Don’t Make Marriage Sound Appealing / Christian Singles: Dump the Equally Yoked Teaching

Revolting Attitudes Towards Abused Wives From a Southern Baptist Seminary Student – Southern Baptists Don’t Make Marriage Sound Appealing / Christian Singles: Dump the Equally Yoked Teaching

Please consider that if you found this blog post from someone else sharing it on Twitter or Facebook, that the person (especially if a Christian) may not necessarily agree with all my statements and opinions in this post! They might only agree with portions of this message.


Earlier today, Christian Janeway (whom I follow on Twitter) re-tweeted someone else’s post about this guy’s post on Facebook, and awhile after that, Amy Smith (WatchKeep on Twitter) also shared screen caps of this guy’s Facebook posts.

You can see the guy’s post here (mobile Facebook page): (Link): Wife Beating

Here is the link to the regular (non mobile) version: (Link): Wife Beating

This “wife beating” post is in a group called “Friends of Biblical Counseling.”

I have warned readers of my blog before to stay away from Biblical Counseling (sometimes called “Nouthetic Counseling”) in a previous post, when I was giving Christian singles reading this blog this message:

(Link):  Consider The Source: Christians Who Give Singles Dating Advice Also Regularly Coach Wives to Stay in Abusive Marriages

I think the screen name of guy who posted this is named ‘Corriell Savannah Brotherwood,’ and his Facebook bio says he studies theology at SBTS (The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary).

God help us all, or any abused woman this joker may counsel, should he become a pastor or counselor.

Wiki description of SBTS:

 The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary, in Louisville, Kentucky, is the oldest of the six seminaries affiliated with the Southern Baptist Convention.

This Brotherwood individual states in his post that he does not believe that a husband hitting his wife is sin, nor does he think the Bible permits an abused wife to divorce her husband.

Continue reading “Revolting Attitudes Towards Abused Wives From a Southern Baptist Seminary Student – Southern Baptists Don’t Make Marriage Sound Appealing / Christian Singles: Dump the Equally Yoked Teaching”

The Eclipse of White Christian America

The Eclipse of White Christian America

(Link): The Eclipse of White Christian America

Excerpts:

  • A once powerful demographic group is losing ground in American politics.
  • For most of the country’s history, white Christian America—the cultural and political edifice built primarily by white Protestant Christians—set the tone for our national conversations and shaped American ideals. But today, many white Christian Americans feel profoundly anxious as their numbers and influence are waning.
  • ..The key question is not why one white Protestant subgroup is faring worse than another, but why white Protestantism as a whole—arguably the most powerful cultural force in the history of the United States—has faded. The answer is, in part, a matter of powerful demographic changes.

Continue reading “The Eclipse of White Christian America”

I Waited to Have Sex Until I Was 26, And Now I Can’t Have an Orgasm (by a Woman Raised in Christian Purity Culture) – Provides Yet Another Reason to Ditch the Equally Yoked Teaching

I Waited to Have Sex Until I Was 26, And Now I Can’t Have an Orgasm (by a Woman Raised in Christian Purity Culture) – Provides Yet Another Reason to Ditch the Equally Yoked Teaching

—————————————

  • I would not be surprised if (Link): my Blog Stalker, John Morgan, still visits my blog (and sometimes my Twitter account) and steals links and story ideas to blog on at his blog. He’ll probably swipe the following story I found and feature it on his own blog.

—————————————–

I did not see an author’s name on this. It just says “Anonymous”

I have a few comments below this long excerpt:

(Link): I Waited to Have Sex Until I Was 26, And Now I Can’t Have an Orgasm (by a Woman Raised in Christian Purity Culture)

  • by Anonymous
  • May 27, 2016
  • I can’t even talk to my sister or some of my closest friends about it because they all still think I’m a virgin, living my life of purity for the Lord.
  •  ——–
  • I was raised in an almost cult-like Southern Reformed Baptist church. I was told that sex was wrong, lustful thinking was wrong, and basically anything that involved sex before marriage would send me straight to hell. It wasn’t until last year that I had the first physical step of courage to go against my upbringing and risk losing everyone around me to do what I thought was right and okay as a woman — not what I was told by evangelical men.

  • ….The church taught us that sex was one of the cardinal sins. Once defiled, always defiled. Women could not make decisions without a father or husband to do it for them, and how would we earn a husband if we were not pure?
  • They trained the young girls in our church, myself included, that we should live and die to find a husband. Education was fine, as long as it contributed to getting a husband. “Be fruitful and multiply” was the mantra.

  • I went along with this. It was all I knew, and I had no mother figure to tell me otherwise. As I grew older, though, I grew indignant of my small amount of options.

  • They told us to find a husband within the church, one who was “equally yolked,” but no man in the church chose from the church. They left the church to find wives and left a congregation of deserted and bewildered home-schooled hearts. Yet they were applauded for their fine, godly choices in women. Meanwhile, the women of the church were left to rot.

Continue reading “I Waited to Have Sex Until I Was 26, And Now I Can’t Have an Orgasm (by a Woman Raised in Christian Purity Culture) – Provides Yet Another Reason to Ditch the Equally Yoked Teaching”

Women Are More Interested In Sex Than You Think, (2016) Studies Show – Men underestimate their wife’s or girlfriend’s sexual desire; read the signals

Women Are More Interested In Sex Than You Think, (2016) Studies Show – Men underestimate their wife’s or girlfriend’s sexual desire; read the signals

The majority of Christians will disregard this study, because it does not fit their culturally- based gender stereotypes that men are sexual animals and visually oriented while all women are supposedly, basically uninterested in sex and only interested in emotional closeness, weeping at beautiful poetry, and knitting scarves.

It is true: for all their bloviating on how they adhere to “sola scriptura,” many Christians take their secular-cultural based assumptions about women and read them back into the Bible. The Bible no where teaches that “God designed men to be visual” or that “men are more interested in sex than women are.” Christians get those assumptions from their culture or perceived personal experiences – not from the Bible.

(Link): Women Are More Interested In Sex Than You Think, (2016) Studies Show

Excerpts

  • by E. Bernstein
  • Men underestimate their wife’s or girlfriend’s sexual desire; read the signals
  • Rarely are researchers’ findings so satisfying. Women may want more sex than their husbands or partners think.
  • New research by psychologists at the University of Toronto and the University of Western Ontario, (Link): published earlier this month in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, found that men in long-term relationships often underestimate how often their wives or girlfriends want to be intimate.
  • The research consists of three studies, following a total of 229 long-term couples, most of whom are heterosexual. (The sample of homosexual couples was too small to be statistically significant, the researchers say.) Participants ranged in age from 18 to 68 years old; the couples had been together six years on average, and they reported they had sex an average of one to two times a week.
  • ….All three studies showed the same thing: Men consistently underestimated their female partner’s desire, while the women had an accurate read on whether or not their partner was interested in sex. And on the days when the men thought their partner was less sexually interested than she actually was, the women reported being more satisfied in and committed to the relationship.

Continue reading “Women Are More Interested In Sex Than You Think, (2016) Studies Show – Men underestimate their wife’s or girlfriend’s sexual desire; read the signals”

Bride Presents Father With ‘Certificate of Purity’ on Wedding Day – My Thoughts On the Matter

Bride Presents Father With ‘Certificate of Purity’ on Wedding Day

I actually am not terribly interested in discussing this particular news story, but it is right up the alley for this blog, so I feel obligated to a point.

I’ve seen this news story show up on my Twitter account from other people, and in various Christian groups or blogs I visit. I figured that may be another reason I should hop into the fray.

Here is a link about it:

(Link): Md. bride presents father with ‘certificate of purity’ on wedding day

Here is an excerpt from that page with some comments by me below the excerpts:

  • To some people, the idea of waiting for marriage might seem old fashioned, but not for Timothy and Brelyn Bowman. The 20-somethings tied the knot earlier this month in Prince George’s County, and they were virgins when they wed.
  • To prove it, Brelyn presented her father, Pastor Mike Freeman, with a ‘certificate of purity’ on her wedding day. Soon after the wedding, the couple’s social media posts went viral.
  • Appearing on Good Day DC, Brelyn said she signed a pledge to remain a virgin until marriage when she was 13. FOX 5’s Steve Chenevey asked Brelyn how her father reacted to the certificate that she presented to him.
  • “He was so excited because it’s not nothing he required. He didn’t ask, ‘I need you to go and present this.’ It was something because I kept my word,” said Brelyn Bowman. “My sister, who was a virgin when she got married, did the same thing. And she was an example for me, so now I can be an example for others.”

This news story has been discussed on various sites, including

Here is an excerpt from the coverage at SSB, which I believe was written by SSB’s founder, Julie Anne (whom I do really like and respect):

  • I am disgusted that this young lady felt the need to go to a doctor to get a note from him to prove her virginity. Would her father not take her at her word?

To be fair to the father, I have so far not seen a news story saying that the father insisted that the daughter go through a medical exam to prove her virginity (or that she possessed an intact hymen) to him.

Yes, some people, especially ones who are angered at this news story, are attempting to make a distinction between virginity and having an intact hymen.

Yes, it is true that some females can tear their hymen by playing sports and so on, but I think this is a semantic quibble.

Generally speaking, having an intact hymen is part of female virginity; it is usual for women virgins to have an intact hymen. The two concepts are usually linked. So, for whatever reason, I don’t get as angry or upset as others are by this part of the story.

I do think that men who are utterly obsessed with a woman’s virginity or hymen and insist on marrying only a virgin may be  on the sexist side. Although I think these sorts of men are few and far between: most men today prefer to marry NON-virgin women (see (Link): this page on this blog for more on that issue).

I, a virgin woman, would prefer to marry a male virgin, but I know by this time in life, most guys I meet to date will be non-virgins, guys who are divorced or who are widowers, and I’d assume most of them were sexually active with their previous wife. I’ve learned to accept that fact of life and consider other factors in a guy – so men need to do the same with women.

One article I read, from New York Post, I think it was, made it sound like it was the young woman’s, Bowman’s, idea to pursue the “intact hymen” certificate and to publicize it, not her father’s (link to that is below, under the “additional off site links” section).

Here are some of my thoughts on this story, based off the handful of news articles and commentary I’ve seen online.

Off the top of my head, I’m not quite sure what I make of the story.

I’m not really sure if I am for or against this woman getting a certificate of intact hymen signed by a doctor and making this information public.

What I will say is this….

Continue reading “Bride Presents Father With ‘Certificate of Purity’ on Wedding Day – My Thoughts On the Matter”

The Conservative Definition of ‘Family Values’ Is B.S. by K. Holloway

The Conservative Definition of ‘Family Values’ Is B.S. by K. Holloway

I am a conservative but tend to agree with liberals in their critiques of how other conservatives idolize the nuclear family.

Christians above all should REFRAIN from turning marriage and “the family” into idols, but they constantly do so, which marginalizes singles, divorced, childfree, or widowed people.

I am socially conservative and the older I get I find it unrealistic and frustrating that other conservatives decline on dealing with people where they already are, but sit around complaining that things today aren’t as good as they were in “the good old days” (which is usually, to them, the 1950s).

I fail to see how reminiscing about how things were 60 to 70 years ago is supposed to help anyone today with whatever challenges or life circumstances they’re facing.

I also agree that the phrase “Family Values” is often mis-used by the right wing.

I have blogged before about how conservative Christians mis-use the term:

Here is the left wing article that I wanted to post about:

(Link): The Conservative Definition of ‘Family Values’ Is B.S. by K. Holloway

  • Two advocates launch an initiative to push back against nuclear family privilege.
  • In a recent piece for (Link): Salon, family advocates Mia Birdsong and Nicole Rodgers note that at “its peak in the late 1950s, 65 percent of children were living in this type of…family unit. Today, it’s just 22 percent.”
  • Fed up with all the negative representations of non-nuclear families they encountered, the two decided to launch a new initiative called (Link): Family Story to change the way we talk about what family means. “[I]t’s past time that we take back the conservative claim to family” the Family Story website states. The organization is focused on countering the idea that there is a single “right” kind of family.
  • Conservatives constantly (Link): bemoan changes in the American family structure as proof of moral failing, and they have long vilified families with working mothers, single parents, LGBT parents, and non-parental caregivers.
  • But these types of families defy conservative stereotypes and outdated stigmas. Family Story, which allows real families to tell their own stories via powerful videos and other media, will push back against these pathologizing narratives.

Continue reading “The Conservative Definition of ‘Family Values’ Is B.S. by K. Holloway”

Time to End ‘Nuclear Family Privilege’ – Let’s Overcome Irrational Nostalgia for a Version of Family Long Since Transformed

Time to End ‘Nuclear Family Privilege’ – Let’s Overcome Irrational Nostalgia for a Version of Family Long Since Transformed

This site appears to be pretty left wing. I am right wing, but I agree with many of the left’s criticisms about the right’s preoccupation with the nuclear family.

(Link): Time to End ‘Nuclear Family Privilege’ – Let’s Overcome Irrational Nostalgia for a Version of Family Long Since Transformed by M. Birdsong

Excerpts:

  • We’re finally talking about stressed, toxic work worlds, but in a way that benefits wealthy, traditional families.
  • On Sunday, (Link): Anne-Marie Slaughter took to the New York Times to persuasively indict the toxic, anxiety-producing expectations of the modern workplace. It’s the product, she argues, of an “antiquated and broken” system, and it simultaneously hinders America’s competitiveness and the ability for us all to care for our families.

  • Says Slaughter: “We used to have [an infrastructure of care]; it was called women at home.” Slaughter argues that “a workplace designed for the ‘Mad Men’ era, for ‘Leave It to Beaver’ families in which one partner does all the work of earning an income and the other partner does all the work of turning that income into care” is holding all of us back.

  • …There has been an explosion in the diversity of family structures in the U.S. over the last several decades, much of it the result of delayed and declining marriage rates and higher nonmarital birthrates. Forty-one percent of babies born in the U.S. today have parents who are not married, and among millennials, it’s over half.
  • The traditional family, which dominated for just over a decade, wasn’t replaced by one kind of family, but by many kinds of families. Unlike in the early ’60s, today, there is no single-family arrangement that encompasses the majority of children.
  • More individuals live alone, there are more families with married parents who are both employed, more single-parent homes, children living with grandparents, children living with unmarried, cohabitating parents, and households composed of people who are not biologically related or legally bound. Family diversity is the new normal.
  • But despite these trends, the nuclear family is still favored with the most esteemed cultural visibility, still seen as “normal,” “good” and ideal. Divorce is generally seen as failure, cohabitating and raising kids without being married invites the assumption that there is a barrier to marriage, single-parents—especially teenagers, poor people, and/or people of color—are shamed for their “moral failing,” and if you’re an adult older than 35, single, and childfree, everyone from your friends to your bus driver is wondering when you’re going to “settle down.”

Continue reading “Time to End ‘Nuclear Family Privilege’ – Let’s Overcome Irrational Nostalgia for a Version of Family Long Since Transformed”

The Cruel, Capricious Loki-Sounding God of Naive Christians, Concerning Singleness and Marriage – If Only You Had Waited Five More Minutes!

The Cruel, Capricious God of Naive Christians, Concerning Singleness and Marriage – If Only You Had Waited Five More Minutes!

I had tinkered with doing a blog post about this very subject a year or more ago and never got around to it.

(I often have one or two topics mulling in my mind that I would like to blog about but sometimes never get around to writing about them, or only after many months.)

Since I recently addressed this topic in a post on SSB blog, I decided to repeat it here.

I have actually had this happen to me a handful of times on Twitter and Christian forums or blogs.

Someone at the SSB blog, a never married (I believe) adult male who is now past the age of 40 or 50, was remarking how he would have a billion dollars by now, if only he had five dollars every time a Christian had told him since he was a kid, “God will provide you with a spouse.”

I know exactly what he means, because I’ve encountered that cliche’ myself, or seen it repeated in articles for Christian singles many times since I was a kid, too.

Even worse than that is the variation I’ve gotten from one or two other Christians online.

The “If Only You Had Held On, Prayed and/or Trusted and Waited Another ‘X’ Number Minutes, God Was Going to Send You A Spouse” Obnoxious Cliche’

As I remarked on SSB (with a few variations and clarifications added to this version on my blog):

The Christians who utter this variation of the “Trust God to provide you with a spouse” cliche’ tell me not to give up faith in God on this matter right now, because…

(Hold on to your hats!! Get ready!)

What if God was planning on sending me my spouse five minutes from now, and just think,

if only I had held on for another two or five minutes, my dream of marriage would come true!!11!!!1

(I cannot possibly begin to add enough exclamation points to that last statement these types of Christians excitedly quote at me online.)

I don’t find that thought comforting at all, that if only I had waited two more seconds, God would have answered my prayer the way I had hoped and wanted.

On the contrary, it sounds like a cruel and capricious God.

Continue reading “The Cruel, Capricious Loki-Sounding God of Naive Christians, Concerning Singleness and Marriage – If Only You Had Waited Five More Minutes!”

Evangelicals and the Republican Party, as of September 2015

Evangelicals and the Republican Party, as of September 2015

While I myself am right wing and still pretty socially conservative, I’m not as into social conservatives necessarily using the politics or laws to try to make everyone else live life as they see fit (and the left wing does this as well – I do not support liberals who try to cram liberal life style choices or left wing views down people’s throats, either).

Here’s an interesting article that talks about social conservatives, evangelicals, and how they are faring politically, and how they view the GOP.

(Link):  Evangelicals and the Carson Illusion by 

Excerpts

  • September 2015
  • But evangelical culture, as James Davison Hunter notes in (Link): “To Change the World,” his magisterial account of recent Christian engagement with American politics, has a particular fondness for the idea of the history-altering individual, the hope that “one person can stand at the crossroads and change things for good.”

  • As Hunter’s book points out, neither political nor cultural change usually happens like this. Instead, it comes from networks, institutions, interest groups, and it requires strategy, alliance-building and steady pressure.

  • This is part of why evangelical Christians, notwithstanding their numbers, tend to have less influence over actual Republican governance than fiscal conservatives or foreign-policy hawks. They’re always looking for a hero (or heroine), while the party’s other factions focus on staffing decisions and policy commitments, where the real work of politics takes place.

  • In this election cycle, though, the evangelical hero quest is particularly self-defeating. With same-sex marriage established nationwide and social liberalism ascendant, religious conservatives have a clear policy “ask” they should be pressing every major Republican contender to embrace.

  • They need guarantees that the next G.O.P. administration will move proactively — through something like Senator Mike Lee’s evolving First Amendment Defense Act — to protect religious schools and charities from losing grants or accreditation or even tax-exempt status because they maintain a traditional position on sexual ethics.

Duggar Pastor to Married Couples: Have Lots of Sex or Lose your Spouse to the ‘Sexual Revolution’ – (A Brief Critique of This View)

Duggar pastor to married couples: Have lots of sex or lose your spouse to the ‘sexual revolution’

I have several news articles I wanted to blog about, a few pertain to Josh Duggar and the Ashley Madison hack (in addition to the link you see in this post, farther below). I don’t know how I’m going to get around to making all the posts I want to make.

There is so much wrong with this item I’m blogging about right now, I’m not sure where to begin.

I’m an unmarried adult over the age of 40. I don’t have a spouse to have sex with, so how does this Floyd dork (he’s head of the SBC) propose I not fall into the “sexual revolution”? See, churches never think about adult singles who may be trying to be celibate.

I get that, yes, this guy’s sermon was probably prompted by marital infidelity (the Josh Duggar Ashley Madison story), but think about how telling a mixed congregation (mixed as in never married adults, divorced, widowed, and married couples) that the way to get someone from falling into sexual sin is to have lots of marital sex with that person.

What are the divorced and other singles supposed to do, then? Preachers never consider how their sermons will impact or come across to the singles.

Secondly, Josh Duggar’s issue extends beyond adultery. He molested some of his sisters and a babysitter when he was a teen-aged boy.

Or, maybe I’m not putting it the right way, but I don’t think having more sex or consistent sex with a spouse is necessarily always going to keep a spouse from cheating, but preachers often present this advice as though marital sex is some kind of magical protection that will keep a married person from sexual sin.

Conversely, when or if a Christian husband commits adultery, rather than hold that husband squarely accountable for his sexual sin, which should be the proper course of action, sexist pig preachers, who often subscribe to gender complementarianism, blame the wives!

These preachers will often say that if a husband has an affair, it’s because the wife was not giving him enough sex, not the right kind of sex, or she “let herself go” (as in, she probably gained weight or whatever).

Famous Christians preacher Mark Driscoll and TV host Pat Robertson have been on record before as saying if a woman lets herself go, doesn’t “put out” enough, or nags her husband too much, all these behaviors can and will drive a man to cheat.

Not only is this attitude sexist, not only does it not put the blame squarely on the cheating man where it belongs, but, most often, it’s not even true.

I have seen interviews in years past with married men who admit they were cheating. They explain that they had affairs for reasons like they enjoyed feeling validated by another woman, or they were feeling depressed, or wanted excitement.

These same men said the problem or blame was not with their wives!

They said their wives were attractive, wonderful, pretty, sexy, put out enough great sex, and so forth. It’s not that these men were married to ugly, fat, frigid, nagging wives, but that they were bored or empty and trying to fill that empty spot, and they thought the way to fill it was by having affairs.

Look at professional golfer Tiger Woods. The guy was married to a drop dead gorgeous super model wife, and he still had numerous affairs on her. I saw photos online of some of his mistresses, and they were no where near as attractive as his wife.

Consider movie actress Halle Berry. She is gorgeous, a multi-millionaire, I’d take it. One of her former husbands (or long time boyfriend) cheated on her.

The fact is, you can be wealthy and sexy and your spouse might still have an affair on you; I’ve seen this happen over and over to rock singers and movie actors.

Being beautiful or having a lot of money is not necessarily going to keep a spouse from straying, yet most Christian preachers keep spreading this lie that if only you are sexy or pretty enough that this will keep your husband from straying.

This approach does not work for Hollywood actors, so what on earth makes these preachers think it will work for Christian married couples?

Considering that Josh Duggar was molesting his own sisters as a teen, I’d say there is maybe something more going on there than a randy guy who cannot “keep it in his pants.”

That is, I seriously doubt having more sex with his wife Anna would have kept this guy from signing up for porn sites, Tweeting at porn actresses, and paying $1500 to have sex with call girls.

Considering that Josh Duggar’s wife Anna had four of his babies in a five or six year time span, it’s obvious to me that they were having sex once in awhile. It’s not as though Anna was withholding sex all the time, if he was getting her pregnant once a year or so.

The only other angle I wonder about in all this is if Josh Duggar, due to his strict Quivering type upbringing, which pretty much presents women as being nothing more than baby factories, has a mind frame where he sees women as either being Virgin Marys or as Total Whores.

I would guess he views his wife as a pro-creational sex mate and the porn star he paid to have sex with as being good for recreational sex. He probably felt duty bound to have sex with his wife.

Based on what I’ve read of Quivering families, or some extreme Christian fundamentalist families, wives are for creating heirs; they are not for having enjoyable sex with. That is what a mistress or prostitute is for.

Also remember one theme I hammer on here on my blog is that much of Christian culture depicts single women (unmarried ones) as being horny slutty slut bags, but these same Christians depict married women as being un-interested in sex.

Ergo, one will often come across preachers in sermons or blogs guilting or shaming married women into “putting out” more often. Supposedly, married women hate sex and have to be shamed into having sex.

Sex and more sex is not always a solution to every problem in life, not even in married life. Sermons like the ones by Floyd covered in the following demonstrate a naive or ignorant view about sex.

To reiterate, sermons like the ones summarized below bother me because they almost always blame the wives. Women are always being blamed by the sexual sins of men, inside the Christian religion as well as others, such as Islam.

I think the guy below, Floyd, mentions men and women, but the undercurrent is always “blame women, even if the man is at fault – find some way to pin blame on the wife for the husband’s sexual sin.”

(Link):  Duggar pastor [SBC Ronnie Floyd] to married couples: Have lots of sex or lose your spouse to the ‘sexual revolution’

  • Aug 24, 2015, by T Gettys
  • …The pastor [Ronnie Floyd] at the Duggar family’s church devoted his sermon to infidelity — which he blamed on pressures created by the “sexual revolution” — just days after Josh Duggar admitted to adultery when his Ashley Madison accounts were revealed.
  • Ronnie Floyd — president of the Southern Baptist Convention and senior pastor of Cross Church in Springdale, Arkansas, where the Duggars have attended — spoke against homosexuality, divorce and couples living together before marriage during Sunday’s sermon, reported People.

Continue reading “Duggar Pastor to Married Couples: Have Lots of Sex or Lose your Spouse to the ‘Sexual Revolution’ – (A Brief Critique of This View)”

Christian Gender Complementarians, Target Removing Gender Store Signs, Women and Motorcycles, Social Science Doesn’t Confirm that Men Are From Mars / Women From Venus

Christian Gender Complementarians, Target Removing Gender Store Signs, Women and Motorcycles, Social Science Doesn’t Confirm that Men Are From Mars / Women From Venus

I discussed on an older post how, since girlhood, I have really liked motorcycles and still do. I was a tom boy when I was a kid.

I was not into most girly hobbies, but my mother, who was a traditional Christian, tried to pique my interest in girly things by buying me dolls when I was a little girl.

My mother later relented a bit and bought me Evel Knievel toysI was a big fan of Evel Knievel back in the day, and I loved motorcycles.

Evel Knievel
Evel Knievel

I still maintain an interest in motorcycles but have never owned one. I was also into other people, things, or hobbies that were considered more boyish.

Should you wonder: I am a heterosexual woman who does not act or look “butch.” I can wear jeans with chucks and turn around and look damn stunning in short skirts and high heels the next. Men flirt with me and ask me out on dates.

Me being interested in motorcycles and things considered boyish since childhood did not result in me becoming terribly unfeminine or a lesbian.

I mention this because I think one reason some Christians assume if they can make little boys and girls adhere to narrow parameters of what they consider “manly” and “womanly” (which is almost always built on secular cultural stereotypes), that they can keep kids from becoming homosexual later in life.

I’ve written a little bit more about some of these subjects in an older post here:

I have discussed before how the conservative, gender Christian gender complementarian approach to gender has been a big turn-off to me, and how it’s one factor of many that makes it difficult to remain in the Christian faith.

Though I will say that Christians who teach and promote Christian gender egalitarianism are a source of encouragement, such as (Link): Christians For Biblical Equality, or (Link): these guys.

I was raised as a gender complementarian – both my parents are Christians who are into traditional gender roles, and my mother encouraged me to be a typical girly girl. (My mother has since passed away.)

For years and years, I felt and believed that the Bible does endorse the Christian gender complementarian view, as is promoted by CBMW (Christians for Biblical Manhood and Womanhood organization. They have a web site. I hesitate to link to their site from my blog. I really hate linking to their site).

As I grew older, I began suspecting that GC (gender complementarianism) is not true, based upon a closer look at the biblical text itself, which has examples in both Old and New Testaments of women, with God’s stamp of approval, leading and teaching men and killing men. I later totally abandoned the GC perspective.

I still remain a right wing, socially conservative, Republican-voting individual who is, by and large, on board with traditional values. Therefore, and contrary to what GCs fear and promote, jettisoning their position on gender is not a slippery slope; it does not always or necessarily turn a person into a liberal, a Democrat, pro-choicer, or a militant secular feminist.

Several days ago, some writer at CBMW, Grant Castleberry,  wrote a paper about how Target stores are removing signage that says “Boys” and “Girls” from their toy sections. Here is a link to that page, hosted on CBMW:

There were several rebuttals to this CBMW post (most of these written by Christians), such as:

(Link):  Target Is Not Trying to Destroy Gender by Laura Turner

(Link):  Why is the Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood Targeting My Kids? by Tim Fall

(I have disagreed with Tim Fall on a previous topic, but he’s a good egg, and I agree with him more often than not. I certainly agree with him on this Target story)

(Link):  I’m a woman, and God created me to do math and build robots

(Link):   Bigots Lose It Over Target’s Boy Toy Policy by S. Allen

Excerpts:

  • Target’s move toward gender-neutral toy aisles has us celebrating. But some unhappy people are threatening to boycott the store.
  • …And after (Link): Breitbart falsely reported that Target would be “getting rid of the words ‘boys’ and ‘girls’ on clothing” in addition to toys, many on Facebook are under the impression that the company will be removing all gender-based signs from its stores. The original post made it clear that keeping gender-based signage for apparel sections “makes sense” due to “fit and sizing differences.” Target has since (Link): reiterated to several customers: “We are not making any changes to our Men’s, Women’s, Boys’, Girls’, or Baby sections.”
  • …“I have news for [Target] and for everyone else,” he wrote. “God created two different genders.”
  • Fox & Friends found (Link): a psychotherapist who said that the decision went “overboard” and implied that children might “question what their gender is” if they were taken into a Target store without gender-based signage. The caption on the segment: “‘Sign’ of the Times.” Nothing like some light Second Coming humor to kick off your morning.
  • (Link): Blaze contributor and self-declared “professional truth sayer” Mike Walsh blamed Target’s decision on “a few hypersensitive, hyperliberal parents” in a provocative post headlined, “Yes, Target, I Do Want My Daughter to Conform to Her Gender.”
  • Wrote Walsh: “I won’t attempt to defend every gender stereotype or ‘gender norm,’ but I do subscribe to the radical theory that boys and girls are different and distinct from one another in complex, concrete, and important ways, and many of the dreaded ‘norms’ are, well, normal and biological.”
  • Walsh conveniently lays bare the fundamental internal contradiction in the anti-Target outcry: If gender is a universal, biological, and God-ordained constant, then why do children need cultural reinforcement from a retail chain to figure it out? In the bizarro world of far-right logic, gender is at once the strongest force on the planet and the most fragile.
  • The God of Genesis may have created male and female but unless Target puts these words on signs for action figures and Barbie dolls, all of His hard work will be undone.
  • The protests seem to be motivated by the paradoxical fear that children will grow up genderless without Target’s help even though their biology should supposedly guide them into pink and blue aisles without any intervention.
  • But Target is not attacking gender itself, only the outdated idea that girls and boys should play with certain shapes and colors of molded plastic and not others.

Continue reading “Christian Gender Complementarians, Target Removing Gender Store Signs, Women and Motorcycles, Social Science Doesn’t Confirm that Men Are From Mars / Women From Venus”

Men Who Have Children Younger Die By Mid-Life -early marriage also involved, says researchers

Men Who Have Children Younger Die By Mid-Life -early marriage also involved, says researchers

So much for the evangelical, Reformed, and Southern Baptist method of guilt tripping and shaming people into early marriage – and parenthood.

They’ve been having fits about the fact that Christians are either not marrying at all (or not having children at all), or are not marrying or having children until later in life, so they’ve been screaming at Christians to marry before they are 25 and to start cranking out kids really young.

Check this out:

(Link):   How the Age You Become a Father Predicts Mortality

  • August 4, 2015
  • By Patricia Reaney
  • NEW YORK, Aug 4 (Reuters) – First-time dads in their early 20s may have the energy and agility to keep up with their young children, but a new study shows early fatherhood can pose perils later in life.
  • Research by Finnish researchers showed that becoming a father before the age of 25 is linked to a higher chance of dying in middle age.“Men who have a child before the age of 22 have a very clear higher midlife mortality than men who have children later, at an average age of 25 to 26,” said Dr. Elina Einio of the University of Helsinki.

Continue reading “Men Who Have Children Younger Die By Mid-Life -early marriage also involved, says researchers”

Don’t Listen to Assh-les Who Tell You When to Have Kids

Don’t Listen to Assh-les Who Tell You When to Have Kids

This editorial applies to anyone and everyone, but I’ve noticed that evangelicals, Baptists, and other conservative Christians are quite fond of shaming, arguing, or guilt tripping Christians into getting married and having children and by a certain age.

I would encourage you to click through and read this entire link below. I am not in the mood to copy or paste the whole thing here, and some people don’t like it when you reproduce an entire blog post from their blog on yours.

So do click through to read the whole thing, because there are huge chunks of arguments this author raises to defend you making your own choices on when to have children rather than being shamed into having kids when other people say you should – ones that don’t appear in my excerpts below.

(Link): Don’t Listen to Assh-les Who Tell You When to Have Kids

Excerpts

  • by Tracy Moore
  • For the first time in seven years, the birth rate has (Link): risen. The 1 percent increase is attributed to women in their 30s and 40s popping ‘em out a smidge faster.

  • But, before you begin to celebrate the expansion of motherhood’s age range, here are a bunch of statistics from a piece at Quartz that says that those older moms and dads are miserable—and that it’s high time they stopped pretending otherwise.

Continue reading “Don’t Listen to Assh-les Who Tell You When to Have Kids”

Baptists Still Advocating Unbiblical Bedroom Evangelism as Growth Strategy (2015)

Baptists Still Advocating Unbiblical Bedroom Evangelism as Growth Strategy (2015)

Before I get to the story about Baptists I wanted to share this link:

(Link): Blogger Guy,  John H. Morgan, Who Accused Me Of Being Untrustworthy Apparently Finds My Blog Trustworthy Enough to Use As A Resource

———————

Baptists Still Advocating Unbiblical Bedroom Evangelism as Growth Strategy (2015)

While the Bible does not speak against a married Christian couple having children and raising them to hopefully be Christians, the Bible nowhere advocates “bedroom evangelism,” yet I continue to see Christians promoting this notion, which marginalizes people who are unmarried, child free, or infertile.

The Bible’s main approach to evangelization is to tell believers to go to other towns and cities and spread the Gospel. The Bible does not tell Christians to marry and make babies and raise babies as Christians.

To put this much attention on to procreation and marriage is to exclude infertile Christians, the divorced, widows, the child free (couples who choose not to have children) and the never married.

It is to tell the divorced, never married, widows, the child free, and the infertile and anyone else who does not fit the “Married with Kids” trope that spreading the Gospel is not for them, it is a task only for married couples who are fertile and who want to have children.

(Link): Here are three reasons why Southern Baptists are on the decline

Excerpt:

  • June 16 2015
  • But evangelism is multifaceted. It includes everything from planting new churches to bringing up children in the faith.
  • Retention is especially important for generational continuity in churches.
  • Although Pew’s numbers suggest that evangelicals do tend to replace those they lose with new members, virtually all churches depend upon “children of the church” – people raised in Christian families – for the bulk of their members.
  • SBC churches need to make sure its parents are equipped to explain and model the Christian life to their children.

This authors, who are presumably Baptist, I take it – are in error to encourage Baptist growth by Baptist biological procreation.

They should instead be telling all Baptists, whether single, divorced, infertile, or childfree, to tell their Non Christian neighbors about Jesus.

They do, earlier, discuss the following:

  • Few [Christians] tell others about their faith, or invite co-workers and neighbors to church

But then the authors follow that paragraph with the one I excerpted above, advocating for bedroom evangelization. The solution is not for Christians to marry and have children, but for Christians of all martial statuses to share their faith with Non-Christians.

——————-

Related Posts:

(Link):  If the Family Is Central, Christ Isn’t, by John B. Carpenter, CP Guest Contributor

(Link):  Conservatives and Christians Fretting About U.S. Population Decline – We Must “Out-breed” Opponents Christian Host Says

(Link):  Really, It’s Okay To Be Single – In order to protect marriage, we should be careful not to denigrate singleness – by Peter Chin

(Link):  Southern Baptist Leaders Highlight Benefits Of Youthful Matrimony – Southern Baptists downplay adult singleness, uphold trope that virginity past 25 is impossible etc

(Link):  “Who is my mother and who are my brothers?” – one of the most excellent Christian rebuttals I have seen against the Christian idolatry of marriage and natalism, and in support of adult singleness and celibacy – from CBE’s site

(Link):  Southern Baptists open to reaching out to LGBT – but still don’t give a flying leap about HETERO CELIBATE UNMARRIED ADULTS

(Link):  Southern Baptists Pushing Early Marriage, Baby Making – Iranians Pushing Mandatory Motherhood – When Christians Sound Like Muslims

(Link):   Typical Erroneous Teaching About Adult Celibacy Rears Its Head Again: To Paraphrase Speaker at Ethics and Public Policy Center: Lifelong Celibacy is “heroic ethical standard that is not expected of heteros, so it should not be expected of homosexuals”

(Link): Southern Baptists (who don’t TRULY support sexual purity) Announce 2014 Sex Summit

(Link): Southern Baptist’s New Sexist “Biblical Woman” Site – Attitudes in Total Face Palm of a Site One Reason Among Many This Unmarried and Childless Woman Is Saying Toodle-Oo to Christianity

(Link): Southern Baptists – Still Majoring in the Minors and ignoring the never married (singles) – Why Church Membership is Down

(Link): Never Married Christians Over Age 35 who are childless Are More Ignored Than Divorced or Infertile People or Single Parents

(Link): Southern Baptists Perpetuate Myths About Genders, Sex, and Adult Singles at 2014 ERLC Summit – All Women Are harlots, men cannot control themselves

(Link): Divorce Rates in America Decreasing But Divorce Rates on Increase Among Southern Baptists

(Link): Are Marriage and Family A Woman’s Highest Calling? by Marcia Wolf – and other links that address the Christian fallacy that a woman’s most godly or only proper role is as wife and mother

(Link):  Are Single People the Lepers of Today’s Church? by Gina Dalfonzo

(Link):  Biblical Womanhood Does Not Hinge Upon Marital Status or Parenthood – also: Christians who portray all women as sexual temptresses – by S. Burden

Woman Who Helped Inmates Make Prison Break Cheated on Her Husbands – Her First Husband Claims

Woman Who Helped Inmates Make Prison Break Cheated on Her Husbands Her First Husband Claims

Early this morning, I was watching news coverage about the woman who helped the two guys escape from some prison.

The anchor person said that the woman’s first husband said that she had two or more affairs on him when they were married, and I believe the news program said she was cheating on husband two with one of the inmates, or was being flirted with by the inmates, which is why she helped them.

I find this funny.

And I am so terribly sorry to keep beating this very dead horse here on my blog, but, any time I come across news stories of married people behaving badly – whether they are having affairs, mugging little old ladies, or helping inmates in prison breaks – It makes me laugh.

I grew up in a Baptist and evangelical culture that told me constantly, in sermons, books, TV shows and so on, that being married (and a parent) were necessary milestones in life. That if you remain single and/or childless, you are obviously immature and ungodly.

A lot of conservative Christians really feel that marriage and pro-creation are necessary life steps to attain maturity and other positive characteristics.

The Bible, of course, teaches none of this CRAP, but these assumptions by 95% of conservative Christians never stop.

Here are links about the woman who helped the men to escape (and again, she was married. I do not know if she had children or not).

I will see if I can find online reports confirming that she had affairs in the past, or with the inmates.

After having read more stories about this woman, Joyce Mitchell, she sounds like a whore-bag.

(Link):  EXCLUSIVE: Prison worker who agreed to drive ‘Shawshank’ escapees is ‘a troublemaker’ and a ‘serial cheater’ claims EX-HUSBAND, who says he could see her falling for someone in prison

  • Joyce Mitchell, 51, known at Tillie, worked at Clinton Correctional Facility and confessed she planned to drive getaway car for escapees
  • Tillie is suspected of helping the two killers escape, thinking that she had a future with one of them – Richard Matt
  • Her ex-husband Tobey Premo, 51, tells Daily Mail Online that his wife was a serial cheater
  • ‘I was devastated,’ he said. ‘I kissed her on the bus when I was 16 and I liked her ever after’
  • Former colleague Nancy Hewitt tells Daily Mail Online Tillie was caught having sex on the railroad tracks near her former place of employment
  • She was cheating on Premo with Lyle Mitchell, her current husband

(Link): Watch Live: Cuomo, Shumlin give update on prison break

  • After all the meticulous planning Richard Matt and David Sweat put into breaking out of prison, their plan on the run may be much less sophisticated.
  • Two convicted killers escaped from the maximum-security facility in Dannemora, N.Y.
  • He said officers have been asked to be “extra vigilant” in light of the continuing search. “My windows are locked and everything”. They were married for five years until she had at least two affairs, according to the Daily Mail. Among them is Joyce Mitchell, a training supervisor in the tailor shop where Sweat and Matt worked.

Investigators believe Mitchell planned to pick up the inmates after their escape, but changed her mind at the last minute, a source familiar with the investigation told CNN.

(Link):  Prison employee arrested, charged with aiding escape of two murderers

  • The female prison employee at the center of an investigation into the escape of two killers was arrested Thursday and charged with helping them flee the maximum security facility.
  • Maj. Charles Guess of the New York State Police told an evening press conference Joyce Mitchell, 51, faced one felony and one misdemeanor charge related to aiding Richard Matt and David Sweat, who escaped from the Clinton Correctional Facility in upstate New York one week ago.

(Link):  Prison worker is ARRESTED for helping ‘Shawshank’ escapees – amid claims she ‘gave them hacksaws, had affairs with BOTH of them and that her husband helped too’ 

  • Mitchell ‘admitted to giving Richard Matt and David Sweat prohibited items’
  • These included hacksaw blades, drill bits and goggles with attached lights
  • Married mother-of-one also ‘agreed to be getaway driver, but got cold feet’
  • The female prison worker who allegedly helped two murderers escape from a New York prison last weekend by supplying them with prohibited items has been charged in the breakout.

  • Joyce Mitchell, an industrial training supervisor at Clinton Correctional Facility in Dannemora, also reportedly agreed to be the getaway driver for Richard Matt and David Sweat, but got cold feet.

  • The 51-year-old grandmother was arrested on Friday evening on charges that she aided the pair in their extraordinary escape last Saturday.

  • She will be arraigned on counts of promoting prison contraband in the first degree – a felony – and criminal facilitation in the fourth degree – a misdemeanor – on Friday night, officials said.

  • Mitchell is rumored to have had affairs with both Matt, 48, and Sweat, 34, before providing them with contraband for their escape, including hacksaw blades, drill bits and goggles with lights.

(Link):  Prison Worker in Love Arrested for Helping Murderers Break Out of Prison

  • Joyce Mitchell, an industrial training supervisor in the tailor shop at Clinton Correctional Facility in Dannemora, New York, has been arrested for her part in helping two convicted murderers, Richard Matt and David Sweat, break out of the prison.
  • Mitchell had developed a romantic relationship with Richard Matt, 48, who violently tortured and killed his elderly boss in 1997 before gruesomely dismembering him with a hacksaw.  The relationship had been the subject of a complaint by a co-worker earlier this year, but the department of corrections’ investigation came back inconclusive.

SBC President Floyd: God Forgives Child Molesting (i.e., Josh Duggar) But Not Transgenderism (Bruce / Caitlyn Jenner)

SBC President Floyd: God Forgives Child Molesting But Not Transgenderism

Floyd is president of the SBC, if I am not mistaken.

It is very inconsistent for a person to say God can and does forgive child molesting but not transgenderism, which is what Floyd has done.

I myself do not support either. Child molesting is revolting, sick, immoral and criminal. I don’t support transgenderism, either.

Transgenderism is a topic I seldom discuss here at my blog for different reasons, one of which, I don’t have a lot of interest in the topic.

I don’t agree with transgenderism, but I do not hate transgender people.

I think it’s hypocritical to support Josh Duggar the self professing child molester, say God can forgive him, but then turn around and condemn Bruce Jenner for dressing like a lady and getting breast implants and insist God cannot or will not forgive that.

In my view, a boy or man molesting a little girl is a hundred billion times worse than an adult male who decides to get breast implants and wear lipstick and skirts.

(Link):  Arkansas pastor says Caitlyn Jenner is defying God but Josh Duggar can be forgiven

  • BY MEG WAGNER
  • NEW YORK DAILY NEWS
  • Wednesday, June 3, 2015, 9:43 AM
  •  The conservative pastor who claimed God can forgive Josh Duggar amid (Link): his molestation scandal said during a fire-and-brimstone sermon that Caitlyn Jenner is defying the way God made her.Ronnie Floyd, the Duggar family’s pastor who heads the Pinnacle Cross Church in Arkansas, said Jenner was a sinner and should no longer be considered an American hero.God made two genders, and “there’s no fluidity to that,” he said.

    But hours after the scathing homily, he (Link): told People that Josh Duggar, who is accused of molesting at least five underage girls when he was a teenager, can be forgiven for his wrongdoing.

  • Jenner, formerly known as Bruce, came out as transgender in (Link): an April interview with Diane Sawyer. The Olympic gold medalist (Link): made her debut as Caitlyn on the cover of Vanity Fair on Monday.Fans praised Jenner for the bold debut — but a day before the magazine cover was released, Floyd called her transition “sad.”
  • (Link): He said in the recorded Sunday address: “But let me tell you what else is sad: the comments from the American culture. Comments like, ‘Once a champion, always a champion.’ Comments like ‘An American hero once again,’”

    Floyd refused to call Jenner by her preferred gender and called her “Bruce” throughout the hourlong speech.

    “Did God make him this way? Absolutely not,” he said.

  • Floyd urged his congregants to raise their children to be the gender in which God created them, saying: “Gender is not fluid. God made you male or female. There’s no fluidity to that.“No such thing as gender neutral. No such thing as unisex,” he said. “Couples, you raise your girls to be girls. Don’t raise them to be anything else other than girls. If they’re decreed by God to be a girl, then they need to be girls.”

    Later that day, Floyd spoke to People about Duggar’s molestation scandal.

     The 27-year-old admitted to “acting inexcusably” and “hurting others” after he was accused of fondling the breasts and genitals of at least five underage girls as a teenager. A (Link): new report released Wednesday revealed that he confessed to molesting his 5-year-old sister when he was 15 years old.

    “Everyone does wrong, and what was wrong was very wrong as to what was testified to and it’s completely unacceptable,” Floyd said of Duggar’s confession. “But I’m thankful, whether it’s him or any other one, that I serve a God who can forgive everything.”

  • Duggar, the eldest of the 19 Duggar children featured on “19 Kids & Counting,” resigned his position as a lobbyist with the Family Research Council, an organization dedicated to preserving family values in America.

(Link):  Duggar family pastor likens Caitlyn Jenner’s ‘sins’ against God to abusing children and family members

(Link): Bruce ‘Caitlyn’ Jenner’s Sexual Transition Is a Sin Against God, Says ’19 Kids and Counting’ Duggar Family Pastor

(Link):  Josh Duggar Pastor Likens Molestation Scandal to Caitlyn Jenner Transition

(Link):  Just Look At This Asshole: Duggar Pastor Says Caitlyn Jenner Is “Defying God”

(Link):  Pastor Says Josh Duggar, Caitlyn Jenner Are Both ‘Sinners’

  • The Duggar family pastor has some thoughts about the Josh Duggar molestation scandal and Caitlyn Jenner.
  • “Everyone does wrong, and what was wrong was very wrong as to what was testified to and it’s completely unacceptable,” Dr. Ronnie Floyd of the Pinnacle Cross Church in Rogers, Arkansas, told People magazine, referring to the allegations that Duggar molested five underage girls when he was a teenager. “But I’m thankful, whether it’s him or any other one, that I serve a God who can forgive everything.”
  • Floyd’s definition of “sin” evidently extends to Caitlyn Jenner as well. On Sunday, he gave a sermon criticizing the Olympic gold medalist and reality star whose July 2015 cover of Vanity Fair is being hailed by people around the world this week. Jenner recently gave an inspirational interview with Diane Sawyer in which she came out as transgender.
  • “You dads, make sure you raise your sons around men who are manly,” Floyd said, according to People magazine. “What’s remarkable about this is the world is applauding. Gender is not fluid.” But added that the Bible says “all humans be treated with dignity and respect,” whatever their sins.
  • “Bruce Jenner is no different from all of us,” Floyd reportedly said in his sermon, using the name by which Caitlyn Jenner was formerly known. “We are all sinners. The key is cleansing our sins through Christ’s grace.”
  • Joel Watts, author of From Fear to Faith: Stories of Hitting Spiritual Walls, explained to The Huffington Post why Floyd might consider Duggar being absolved of sin, but not Jenner.
  • “I think the story with Caitlyn is that [fundamentalists] see the story with Caitlyn as controlling [her] own body, which, for a fundamentalist, is a giant paradox they can’t wrap their head around,” said Watts.
  • “Josh Duggar is a victim [to them], and Caitlyn is making it where God is the victim. Somehow God has made a mistake. It’s hard for them to understand — they generally reject science and psychology anyway.”
  • “For them, they see it as a sin against God directly and they don’t understand. For them, it’s a perversion,” Watts continued. “Josh prayed for his sins and is clearly forgiven. Caitlyn didn’t try hard enough.”

    Floyd was not immediately available for further comment.

(Link):   Duggar family pastor defends ’19 Kids and Counting’ family: God is always forgiving

(Link):  ’19 Kids and Counting’ Duggar Family Church Pastor ‘Surprised’ at Josh Duggar Molestation Charges, But Says ‘We Serve a God Who Can Forgive Anything’

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Related Posts:

(Link):   Christian Josh Duggar Resigns from Family Research Council after Sexual Abuse Allegations

(Link):  Christians Teaching That All Sexual Sins Are Equal – Thoughts and Reflections

(Link): Focus on the Family Members Practice Infidelity or Homosexuality and Get Divorced and Remarry – links to exposes

(Link):  Marriage Made Into An Idol by Christians, Christians Who Believe Christian Men Are All Potential Rapists – Examples of these and other Topics

(Link):   A Response To J D Hall’s Vomit-tastic Post about Village Church’s Handling of Certain Members, Covenants, and Marriages

(Link): Where Are America’s Virgins? Discouraging the Virtuous by Julia Duin

Singles Advocate DePaulo Responds to Right Wing, Conservative Critics of Singlehood, Who Blame Singles For Breakdown of The Family (reminder: I myself am right wing)

Singles Advocate DePaulo Responds to Right Wing, Conservative Critics of Singlehood, Who Blame Singles For Breakdown of The Family

For anyone who is new to this blog:

I am conservative, I vote Republican, and don’t agree with Democrats and left wingers on many topics.

I am NOT against traditional marriage or pro-creation.

However, where I part company with many other conservative Christians and right wingers is their tendency to demonize anyone who does not happen (for whatever reason) to marry young, to not marry at all, or who do not have children.

Right wingers and most Christians tend to make an idol out of marriage and the nuclear family, and I am opposed to that tendency.

There is nothing wrong with marriage or the nuclear family.

If you want to marry and have kids (I myself would like to marry), that is swell. Go for it.

My problem is how other conservatives assume the worst of people who are, for whatever reason, whether by choice or by circumstance, single or childless.

A few months ago, I found a bizarre article or two by a conservative Christians who blames HETERO SINGLE CHRISTIANS for the rise in homosexuality.

Seriously. I have no idea how anyone can connect Christian hetero singles to more homosexuality, but they tried.

Here is a link to that former page:

Here is the new page, where DePaulo refutes the idea that hetero singles are causing the breakdown in family and culture.

I agree with much of this editorial by DePaulo, and maybe disagree with only one or two points.

(Link): Who’s Afraid of Single People? by B. DePaulo, October 2014

  • Who should be blamed for the supposed breakdown of family and community ties?
  • There are people who are very afraid of single people. I’m not just talking about the (Link): stereotype of single men as scary criminals (which, by the way, is a  myth (edit: I removed this link, it is to her book Singled Out on Amazon, you may visit Amazon to view it therel) and not a truth).
  • No, there are people who believe that the growing number of single people in America is a threat to our nation. Getting pinned on us single people are “the sharp decline of social trust and the breakdown of community ties.”

Continue reading “Singles Advocate DePaulo Responds to Right Wing, Conservative Critics of Singlehood, Who Blame Singles For Breakdown of The Family (reminder: I myself am right wing)”